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Leaving 9 yr old in car?

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24

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    #32
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    facehugger99 wrote: »
    How many don't go on fire?

    The issue isnt about potential for the car going on fire. Its horribly uncomfortable to be left sitting in a car. So what if its locked. They unlock it to get out and you've a car lying around that's unlocked. Its not worth the hassle.


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    #33
    Bob Harris
    Registered Users Posts: 3,462 ✭✭✭Bob Harris


    If you can't leave a 9-year old in a car for a few minutes then we may as well give up.


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    #34
    facehugger99
    Registered Users Posts: 7,225 ✭✭✭facehugger99


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    The issue isnt about potential for the car going on fire.

    So why did you reply "every day" to the question of how often cars go on fire?

    You obviously thought it was relevant.


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    #35
    sydthebeat
    Subscribers Posts: 41,021 ✭✭✭✭sydthebeat


    If a nine year old refuses to go into a shop and wants to be left in the car.....

    WTF is the problem???

    Leave the windows down a notch.
    The doors will open from the inside.


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    #36
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    facehugger99 wrote: »
    So why did you reply "every day" to the question of how often cars go on fire?

    You obviously thought it was relevant.

    I just answered a question.


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    #37
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    sydthebeat wrote: »
    If a nine year old refuses to go into a shop and wants to be left in the car.....

    WTF is the problem???

    Leave the windows down a notch.
    The doors will open from the inside.

    A notch in the windows doesn't create any airflow for a parked car.


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    #38
    Bob Harris
    Registered Users Posts: 3,462 ✭✭✭Bob Harris


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    The issue isnt about potential for the car going on fire. Its horribly uncomfortable to be left sitting in a car. So what if its locked. They unlock it to get out and you've a car lying around that's unlocked. Its not worth the hassle.

    Ah here now....


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    #39
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    Bob Harris wrote: »
    Ah here now....

    Check out the video I posted earlier. Or sit in one with the windows up and the ac off for 15 minutes later.


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    #40
    olestoepoke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,386 ✭✭✭olestoepoke


    I leave my 9 year old son in the car alone when I run into our local spar all the time. Don't see any problem with it at all.


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    #41
    sydthebeat
    Subscribers Posts: 41,021 ✭✭✭✭sydthebeat


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    A notch in the windows doesn't create any airflow for a parked car.

    First off that's BS.
    All you need for air flow is a pressure differential which a bare breeze can cause.
    Second off, your idea of a notch and mine could be competely different.

    And third off....
    They're nine years old, not nine months.
    If they want to get out of the car, they can.
    My nine year old walks to the shop himself.
    If they come into the shop, give them the keys and tell them to go lock the car.

    Seriously.... The utter scare mongering and over mothering in this thread is baffling


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    #42
    Bob Harris
    Registered Users Posts: 3,462 ✭✭✭Bob Harris


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    Check out the video I posted earlier. Or sit in one with the windows up and the ac off for 15 minutes later.

    If it's 30 degrees and the car is in the sun then it gets hot.
    If it's -5º and blowing a gale you'd be delighted to be in a car.


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    #43
    olestoepoke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,386 ✭✭✭olestoepoke


    This is how snowflakes are created, mollycoddled children end up being useless adults that can do nothing for themselves.


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    #44
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    olestoepoke wrote: »
    This is how snowflakes are created, mollycoddled children end up being useless adults that can do nothing for themselves.

    My kid is far from mollycoddled.


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    #45
    pconn062
    Registered Users Posts: 5,370 ✭✭✭pconn062


    olestoepoke wrote: »
    This is how snowflakes are created, mollycoddled children end up being useless adults that can do nothing for themselves.

    A bit like adults who can't think for themselves and just spout stupid catchphrases and buzzwords they've heard imported from the States.

    My bigger issue would be the 9 year old not wanting to get out of the car. They're nine, when I was 9 that wouldn't have been my choice!


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    #46
    Foweva Awone
    Registered Users Posts: 1,740 ✭✭✭Foweva Awone


    When I was nine and even much younger, my dad (self-employed engineer) would very often bring me to work with him for the day and I'd be left sitting in the car for hours on end outside his workshop or outside whatever pub or hotel or restaurant he was working in. I'd know to bring plenty of books, colouring books, games, whatever to keep myself entertained. (Obviously mobile phones/tablets weren't around back then!) If the car got too hot, I'd open the windows or I'd get out of the car and sit in the shade. By 9 years old I certainly had enough cop on not to mess with the handbrake or controls.

    I'm certainly not endorsing leaving a 9 year old alone in a car for hours at a time in this day and age, but I see no problem whatsoever in leaving a responsible child that age for a few minutes while running into a shop. You have to start giving them independence and responsibility in small chunks eventually. I wouldn't do it with my 5 year old, but would really hope he'd be sensible enough to leave alone for a few minutes by the time he's 9, if not sooner.


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    #47
    olestoepoke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,386 ✭✭✭olestoepoke


    pconn062 wrote: »
    A bit like adults who can't think for themselves and just spout stupid catchphrases and buzzwords they've heard imported from the States.

    My bigger issue would be the 9 year old not wanting to get out of the car. They're nine, when I was 9 that wouldn't have been my choice!
    Funny I never heard a yank say "mollycoddled" I always thought that was an Irish phrase. Sounds like you had very controlling parents, probably the reason for your aggressive reply


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    #48
    pconn062
    Registered Users Posts: 5,370 ✭✭✭pconn062


    olestoepoke wrote: »
    Funny I never heard a yank say "mollycoddled" I always thought that was an Irish phrase. Sounds like you had very controlling parents, probably the reason for your aggressive reply

    Don't be such a snowflake. ;)


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    #49
    spurious
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 27,120 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    'Didn't want to go to the shop'.
    She's nine. She does what her parent says, or there are consequences.
    I would start with leaving her in the car while I went in, but it wouldn't finish there. Little madam. She does what she is told, or she cleans her room/misses her TV show/gets the wifi turned off, whatever.

    What happens when she 'doesn't want' to go to school/do her homework/pick up after herself?


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    #50
    sydthebeat
    Subscribers Posts: 41,021 ✭✭✭✭sydthebeat


    spurious wrote: »
    What happens when she 'doesn't want' to go to school/do her homework/pick up after herself?

    its called teaching personal responsibility.....

    all those youve mentioned above have a consequence on the childs life.... going into a shop doesnt. So if nine year old asks why do i have to go into the shop and the response is "because i said so"... well thats just poor parenting.


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    #51
    spurious
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 27,120 CMod ✭✭✭✭spurious


    sydthebeat wrote: »
    its called teaching personal responsibility.....

    all those youve mentioned above have a consequence on the childs life.... going into a shop doesnt. So if nine year old asks why do i have to go into the shop and the response is "because i said so"... well thats just poor parenting.

    Apparently she could be incinerated for her freedom of choice if you go by the nonsense here.


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    #52
    Darc19
    Registered Users Posts: 3,817 ✭✭✭Darc19


    spurious wrote: »
    'Didn't want to go to the shop'.
    She's nine. She does what her parent says, or there are consequences.
    I would start with leaving her in the car while I went in, but it wouldn't finish there. Little madam. She does what she is told, or she cleans her room/misses her TV show/gets the wifi turned off, whatever.

    What happens when she 'doesn't want' to go to school/do her homework/pick up after herself?

    That would not be my way of dealing with it.

    She's 9, she's starting to become independent. As a parent you need to know the important issues.

    Not wanting to come into a shop is not important. You let them win those battles.

    Not wanting to go to school is important. You don't give in on that battle.

    Imo the OP did right and allowed the daughter have her alone time. There was no risk.


    As for others

    How many children have been abducted by total strangers in Ireland in the past 10 years? Just one in Athlone and he was caught and is serving life.

    How many children been hurt by car going on fire whilst parked? Don't think there's ever been a case.


    The world is far safer now than ever for children. Only problem is fake news on social media.


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    #53
    facehugger99
    Registered Users Posts: 7,225 ✭✭✭facehugger99


    People's assessment of risk is hilarious.

    Will happily drive at 100kph down a 2-lane road but won't leave a child for 5 minutes in a carpark?

    There is probably a greater risk of being injured in the walk from the car to the shop and back again.


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    #54
    biko
    Registered Users Posts: 81,223 ✭✭✭✭biko


    I'd be happy to leave her in the car as long as I know she won't unlock it and wander off.
    It actually means I get my shopping done faster and there is no nagging to get this or that cereal or chocolates.


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    #55
    eagle eye
    Registered Users Posts: 37,527 ✭✭✭✭eagle eye


    sydthebeat wrote:
    its called teaching personal responsibility.....
    all those youve mentioned above have a consequence on the childs life.... going into a shop doesnt. So if nine year old asks why do i have to go into the shop and the response is "because i said so"... well thats just poor parenting.
    Wrong.
    There is already a strong relationship there. Just saying that is not poor parenting because it's likely there has been many conversations about situations where the child didn't want to do something before.
    Parents might be under a lot of pressure and in a rush so they'll use that line and then sit the child down later when they have time and explain it to them.
    Personally I'd tell the child that I'm not comfortable with them staying in the car on their own so it's not happening.


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    #56
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    olestoepoke wrote: »
    This is how snowflakes are created, mollycoddled children end up being useless adults that can do nothing for themselves.


    Would you leave your Ray Bans/ Laptop/ Wallet on the passenger seat with the window partially cranked down for 10-15 minutes to go into a shop out of eye-line of the car?
    I doubt it.


    Road Safety Authority of Ireland advise against leaving children unattended in cars - that's good enough for me, as they are the people who know a bit more about the risks than the rest of us.


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    #57
    KatyMac
    Registered Users Posts: 1,209 ✭✭✭KatyMac


    When my daughters were that age and they didn't want to come into shop or whatever with me I would leave them the keys. They were able to lock themselves in but also be in a position to get out if necessary.


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    #58
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    spurious wrote: »
    Apparently she could be incinerated for her freedom of choice if you go by the nonsense here.


    https://www.usfa.fema.gov/downloads/pdf/statistics/v19i2.pdf


    This is US statistics: Approximately one in eight fires responded to by fire departments across the nation is a highway vehicle fire. This does not include the tens of thousands of fire department responses to highway vehicle accident sites.

    It's smoke inhalation that kills people in a fire, not incineration.



    I used to work in a job that dealt with car breakdowns. At least once a day our office would get a call about a car on fire. In Ireland. And our office was only one of 3 such offices. So a conservative estimate for me would be that about three cars a day in Ireland caught fire in some minor way. A child might not even realise that smoke is coming into the interior of the car until they've become unconscious. Or they could already be asleep (like my 7yo always does in the car) and not notice any smoke.


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    #59
    Effects
    Registered Users Posts: 9,761 ✭✭✭Effects


    Neyite wrote: »
    Would you leave your Ray Bans/ Laptop/ Wallet on the passenger seat with the window partially cranked down for 10-15 minutes to go into a shop out of eye-line of the car?
    I doubt it.

    I'd be more worried about someone stealing my laptop/wallet than my child to be honest.


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    #60
    sydthebeat
    Subscribers Posts: 41,021 ✭✭✭✭sydthebeat


    eagle eye wrote: »
    Wrong.
    There is already a strong relationship there. Just saying that is not poor parenting because it's likely there has been many conversations about situations where the child didn't want to do something before.
    Parents might be under a lot of pressure and in a rush so they'll use that line and then sit the child down later when they have time and explain it to them.
    Personally I'd tell the child that I'm not comfortable with them staying in the car on their own so it's not happening.

    Im not wrong.

    you should do some research into early chiildhood education and sociology if you think your way of doing things is "right".

    Teaching your child independence and self though is much more important at that age than to be scare mongering them about bogey men coming to take them, the car going on fire etc.......

    perhaps you should step back and take a look at yourself and ask why YOU have a problem with a 9 year old staying in the car for 10 minutes while you go into a shop...

    what are YOU afraid of?


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    #61
    meeeeh
    Registered Users Posts: 11,624 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    It depends. Sometimes it's easier to leave them in the car. If I need to pay for petrol it will be easier, cheaper and quicker to leave them in the car than have an argument why they can't have crisps. And frankly there is a lot more chance someone will steal your laptop bag than decide to kidnap a child. I don't like leaving them in the car when going to supermarket because you never know when you will be stuck behind a donkey having a big ling chat with the cashier.


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