Going to posh place for drink and meal don't know how to conduct myself!

One eyed Jack · 09-07-2019 02:09AM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

What do I do?

What do I wear?

Is it ok for me to ask the other person what I should order???

How should I speak?

I am most discombobulated !
:eek:

There isn’t a formal dress code in Chapter One, but elegant casual would be the way to go - your favourite little black dress, some fine jewellery and not too heavy on the makeup.

It’s perfectly ok to ask the other person what to order, but you can also cast your eye over the menu here, plenty of variety -

https://www.chapteronerestaurant.com/menus/four-course-dinner/

Speak as you normally would, it’s not that pretentious. I’ve got an accent somewhere between a bogger and a city knackcent, and as long as you’re not loud or drawing attention to yourself, you’ll be fine.

Lastly, speaking of not drawing attention to yourself, this is obvious for most people, but for Gods sake don’t go getting all affectionate with each other at the dining table. Save that for afters

kowloon · 09-07-2019 02:10AM

Tasting menu is always good, if there's something you don't like someone else with you is bound to want it. If I just want a big feed that I already know I like I end up in Iskanders or Zaytoon.

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 09:05PM

JayZeus wrote: »

What’s the occasion?

Business dinner.

Capt'n Midnight · 09-07-2019 09:12PM

You gotta watch them fancy restaurants they'll try and shaft you every time if they think you're an imposter

You need to assert dominance.

Start with Gazpacho Soup - warn them that if it's not pipping hot you'll send it back

Steak Tartare - insist on getting it rare, not medium rare. very important.

now that you've established control let the waiter recommend the wine , agree sagely , but demand that it's corked , after all half the fun is uncorking it

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 09:15PM

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

You gotta watch them fancy restaurants they'll try and shaft you every time if they think you're an imposter

You need to assert dominance.

Start with Gazpacho Soup - warn them that if it's not pipping hot you'll send it back

Steak Tartare - insist on getting it rare, not medium rare. very important.

now that you've established control let the waiter recommend the wine , agree sagely , but demand that it's corked , after all half the fun is uncorking it

I am more worried about covering up the fact that our HR director is acting head of sales right now and we have no idea what we are doing.

But maybe this will help distract them!

Capt'n Midnight · 09-07-2019 09:33PM

Reminds me of the time the wife sat for ten minutes wondering what to choose from the menu.

Eventually I had to step in and select, "Play Movie."

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 09:40PM

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Reminds me of the time the wife sat for ten minutes wondering what to choose from the menu.

Eventually I had to step in and select, "Play Movie."

I shall take 20 mins at least not to be outdone!

ToddyDoody · 09-07-2019 09:52PM

Here we go. No need to thank me.

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

What do I do? Panic.

What do I wear? Mixture of lycra / pvc

Is it ok for me to ask the other person what I should order??? Order what's cheapest

How should I speak? Incredibly loudly

Edgware · 09-07-2019 09:54PM

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Reminds me of the time the wife sat for ten minutes wondering what to choose from the menu.

Eventually I had to step in and select, "Play Movie."

Does it take that long to decide between the 7 inch and the nine inch pizza with pineapple toppings?

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 09:55PM

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Here we go. No need to thank me.

I look ****in hot in lyrca. Dont think i won't either!

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 09:56PM

If its nice i might go there again.

ToddyDoody · 09-07-2019 09:57PM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

I look ****in hot in lyrca.

Me too

banie01 · 09-07-2019 09:58PM

Surely you've seen Pretty Woman?
For Cutlery start on the outside and work your way in

If Escargot are on the menu, the OAP waiter will be a deft catcher of any that fly off...

Reviews and Books Galore · 09-07-2019 10:20PM

You'd swear the restaurant is paying the customers with all these rules of decorum

@Iloveyourvibes

I wonder what country your from? I was thinking Polish, but you seem more cheerful.

I don't think.Ukrainian. Maybe Czech?

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 10:25PM

ToddyDoody wrote: »

Me too

K.Flyer · 09-07-2019 11:36PM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

Business dinner.

Go on, give us all the where and when and we will all randomly pass your table and stop and with a ..
"... Heey L.Y.V., great to see you, thanks for all your help with that last project, Great Job, see you soon" or other similar great bundles of praise, nothing too cheesy mind, but anything to help get the job

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 11:41PM

K.Flyer wrote: »

Go on, give us all the where and when and we will all randomly pass your table and stop and with a ..
"... Heey L.Y.V., great to see you, thanks for all your help with that last project, Great Job, see you soon" or other similar great bundles of praise, nothing too cheesy mind, but anything to help get the job

Ooooh!

Don't forget to wear Hawaiian shirts! There is a 20 in it for each of you!

For Forks Sake · 09-07-2019 11:48PM

Do pretty much everything in this :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRgwbkdoIcY

Bobblehats · 09-07-2019 11:48PM

I really don’t know what advice I can give just don’t make a meal of it?

Which of course would defy the whole point. It’s a difficult one

ILoveYourVibes · 09-07-2019 11:54PM

For Forks Sake wrote: »

Do pretty much everything in this :

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VRgwbkdoIcY

That's HILARIOUS where is it from!? :P

K.Flyer · 10-07-2019 12:19AM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

That's HILARIOUS where is it from!? :P

Withnail and I (1987) imdb
Classic movie, Richard E. Grant at his best.

ILoveYourVibes · 10-07-2019 12:20AM

K.Flyer wrote: »

Withnail and I (1987) imdb
Classic movie, Richard E. Grant at his best.

Unusual title.

Seems very different and funny.

I think i would like it.

Edgware · 10-07-2019 05:18PM

Dont ask for ketchup when you order the risotto

ILoveYourVibes · 10-07-2019 05:24PM

Edgware wrote: »

Dont ask for ketchup when you order the risotto

Does that have cheese in it?

Ten of Swords · 10-07-2019 05:38PM

Edgware wrote: »

Dont ask for ketchup when you order the risotto

Ambience is important

ILoveYourVibes · 10-07-2019 05:43PM

I need ambient lighting...they better have ambient lighting.

harry Bailey esq · 10-07-2019 05:53PM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

What do I do?

What do I wear?

Is it ok for me to ask the other person what I should order???

How should I speak?

I am most discombobulated !
:eek:

Smart casual, if the person/people you're dining with are familiar with the restaurant then by all means ask for recommendations, its not considered rude not to adhere to these recommondations, especially if you're eating with a party of three or more. Speak the way you always speak, but be mindful of other diners. I.e, if you've a large hearty booming voice consider toning it down a bit. This is just a suggestion, if yer in good form don't let me dampen your evening. Its the height of importance to be especially nice to front of house staff. They are the ones who can make the difference between a potentially great night out or a pricey, damp squib.
If however all these efforts on your behalf fall flat, and food and service are sub par, then its acceptable to defecate in the sink. Staff will take no offence, as its a subtle hint for them to smile a little more the following evening. Worst kept secret in the industry. Have a shyte in the sink and you'll be treated like a god if you darken the door again. Trust me.

Bobblehats · 10-07-2019 06:01PM

ILoveYourVibes wrote: »

I need ambient lighting...they better have ambient lighting.

How about really harsh spotlighting all the establishments seem to favour nowadays :cool: you’ll be fine...

Edgware · 10-07-2019 06:09PM

Ten of Swords wrote: »

Ambience is important

The original risotto with ketchup man.
( also has a good sketch about peeping out the curtains!)

ILoveYourVibes · 10-07-2019 06:36PM

Bobblehats wrote: »

How about really harsh spotlighting all the establishments seem to favour nowadays :cool: you’ll be fine...

I am paying for ambient lighting! :mad:

I DEMAND THE FINEST AMBIENT LIGHTING AVAILABLE TO HUMANITY!:D

Going to posh place for drink and meal don't know how to conduct myself!

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