How is a Woman supposed to find a Man in the 21st Century

KungPao · 20-06-2019 06:01PM

Easy for any halfway decent lookin woman can a get a man with barely any effort.

Now to keep him, Don’t hassle him if he wants to watch 4 premier league matches on a Saturday, in just his underpants.

Go out with the girls or something.
And bring him back an 8 pk of Heineken on your way home. He’ll love you for all eternity.

Dial Hard · 20-06-2019 06:03PM

Daisy78 wrote:

Honestly itâ€™s probably an age thing, as in there are fewer single men out there in their late thirties/early forties.You might not see it as a positive but at least you have had some short term things even if they didnâ€™t mature into something long term. Plenty of women donâ€™t even get that.

I was married!

Daisy78 · 20-06-2019 06:15PM

Dial Hard wrote: »

I was married!

Yes I know, you said. But you also mentioned that you had some short term flings/relationship. That’s what I was referring to?!!

EmmetSpiceland · 20-06-2019 06:18PM

Dial Hard wrote: »

I was married!

At least that should stop people telling you “your time will come” while giving you that look that goes with it.

Daisy78 · 20-06-2019 06:34PM

KungPao wrote: »

Easy for any halfway decent lookin woman can a get a man with barely any effort.

Now to keep him, Don’t hassle him if he wants to watch 4 premier league matches on a Saturday, in just his underpants.

Go out with the girls or something.
And bring him back an 8 pk of Heineken on your way home. He’ll love you for all eternity.

Without any effort? If that you was the case threads like this would not exist!!

messy tessy · 20-06-2019 06:45PM

My online dating profile was deleted this week for some reason! I'm off to get myself a cat*!

*Dog obviously!

TuringBot47 · 20-06-2019 06:47PM

ToddyDoody wrote: »

How is a Woman supposed to find a Man in the 21st Century

Maybe start before your biological clock is playing the tune to "Countdown".

But typically long term single women tend to get more girly and it's harder for them to share interests, films etc with men.
The ones that get into yoga, rekki, spirituality, angels, Bridget Jones, vegetarianism etc... totally alien to men.

Harvey Weinstein · 20-06-2019 06:50PM

ToddyDoody wrote: »

I mean, with so much rubbish to contend with

True right?

Best get your subscription to Cat Fanciers weekly sorted now rather than later and when they tell you that childless middle aged women are generally miserable and depressed just remember its not true!

Childless middle aged Women have all the fun and spend their days politely turning down all the young studs lining up to hook up with them

And that old canard about middle aged Women becoming invisible? Sure everyone knows Women only get more attractive with age!

Too harsh?

20-06-2019 06:54PM

Daisy78 wrote: »

Honestly it’s probably an age thing, as in there are fewer single men out there in their late thirties/early forties.You might not see it as a positive but at least you have had some short term things even if they didn’t mature into something long term. Plenty of women don’t even get that.

Surely there is a 50/50 ratio - unless men die in droves in this age group, or polygamy is legal?

I guess it could be that men of this age can go for younger women and women their own age whereas women tend not to go younger.

Daisy78 · 20-06-2019 06:57PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Surely there is a 50/50 ratio - unless men die in droves in this age group, or polygamy is legal?

I guess it could be that men of this age can go for younger women and women their own age whereas women tend not to go younger.

Hmm yea I guess so. Which leaves a lot of single women in that bracket.

Galwayguy35 · 20-06-2019 06:59PM

Daisy78 wrote: »

Without any effort? If that you was the case threads like this would not exist!!

A woman will get approached more on a night out by men than men by women and this increases the chances of meeting someone.

And before anyone says it yes I know there are ugly drunk guys who try to chat up women but there are lots of decent lads as well out for the night.

leahyl · 20-06-2019 07:02PM

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

A woman will get approached more on a night out by men than men by women and this increases the chances of meeting someone.

And before anyone says it yes I know there are ugly drunk guys who try to chat up women but there are lots of decent lads as well out for the night.

I can count on one hand the amount of times in my life I’ve been approached on a night out - it’s even less likely to happen of recent years, people just don’t seem to bother anymore.

20-06-2019 07:03PM

Personally if I was single I would go for a woman who is good craic and not a drama queen or the type who wants to "change" me. She should have a positive energy about her and actially enjoy sex. Able to hold a conversation on various topics. Able to be faithful to one man.

Looks wouldn't be important as long as she was a reasonably normal weight and not hideously ugly.

Somehow I think I'd have a small pool to choose from. Most fitting this description are married or in long term relationships. If God forbid I ended up divorced I don't think I'd remarry. I sometimes look around at the women I know and there are 2 that I would consider, one is so gorgeous looking it would be pointless trying - kinda ruins it actually as she had a fabulous personality - and the other one, I think that would work. For the rest, nothing floats my boat at all.

If you'd asked me in my 20s I'd have given very different answers. Maybe men get more picky as they get older?

A bit like with cars when you are young you jump in head first but when older you are much more discerning and look for low running costs and reliability over flashy looks.

20-06-2019 07:12PM

leahyl wrote: »

I can count on one hand the amount of times in my life I’ve been approached on a night out - it’s even less likely to happen of recent years, people just don’t seem to bother anymore.

The whole Metoo stuff has had a chilling effect on this. I also think that people assume older women are married.

leahyl · 20-06-2019 07:14PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

The whole Metoo stuff has had a chilling effect on this. I also think that people assume older women are married.

When you say older... am I in the older bracket now at 34? :-( :-P

fash · 20-06-2019 07:14PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Surely there is a 50/50 ratio - unless men die in droves in this age group, or polygamy is legal?

I guess it could be that men of this age can go for younger women and women their own age whereas women tend not to go younger.

Not really. In a lot of fields, men are spread over a large range while women are clumped in the middle. Which means more women are functional adults than men.
Once you start getting into mid/late thirties, a lot of the"eligible" men have settled down. What you are left with are some (but not all) of the "amazing" men who have decided to keep playing the field, you also have a large contingent who are not capable of forming relationships or are dysfunctional in a major way (alcoholic, violent, gambling, failed to launch, weird etc.). There are some eligible males who haven't hooked up of course as well as "had been in a relationship but now divorced/widowed" men.
This significantly changes the market place - demand for functional males goes up, supply dries up - adding pressure to the dynamic for the "amazing" guys to keep playing the field.
So the guys in that market place have lots of options and tend to select younger women.

Galwayguy35 · 20-06-2019 07:14PM

leahyl wrote: »

I can count on one hand the amount of times in my life I’ve been approached on a night out - it’s even less likely to happen of recent years, people just don’t seem to bother anymore.

I wonder is it that people don't know who is single or not and are afraid to approach in case they make a mistake.

Found this out myself once when I approached a woman who was at the bar and just started talking when a fella started shouting at me for trying to chat up his wife.

He calmed down after a few seconds but it was an embarrassing situation to be in!

leahyl · 20-06-2019 07:15PM

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

I wonder is it that people don't know who is single or not and are afraid to approach in case they make a mistake.

found this out myself once when I approached a woman who was at the bar and just started talking when a fella started shouting at me for trying to chat up his wife.

He calmed down after a few seconds but it was an embarrassing situation to be in!

Lol I got a chuckle out of that, thanks :-P

banie01 · 20-06-2019 07:19PM

fash wrote: »

demand for functional males goes up, supply dries up .

That's so romantic, my functionality is precisely how I want to be judged of I was on the market.

Tho it really does depend on what functionality is required?

I know it's a selective quote

Just trying to be a little light hearted...

Jimmy Bottlehead · 20-06-2019 07:20PM

leahyl wrote: »

When you say older... am I in the older bracket now at 34? :-( :-P

At this point, as I want children, I'd class 34 as on the outer region of my range as if you're talking even just two years before having a child (and that's short enough as is), she's 36 and the associated risks increase.

For me, it became an increasingly important factor while I was single.

20-06-2019 07:22PM

leahyl wrote: »

When you say older... am I in the older bracket now at 34? :-( :-P

Well many people are married before 34 I guess.

leahyl · 20-06-2019 07:24PM

Jimmy Bottlehead wrote: »

At this point, as I want children, I'd class 34 as on the outer region of my range as if you're talking even just two years before having a child (and that's short enough as is), she's 36 and the associated risks increase.

For me, it became an increasingly important factor while I was single.

Lovely, I’ll steer clear of you so :-P

fash · 20-06-2019 07:24PM

banie01 wrote: »

That's so romantic, my functionality is precisely how I want to be judged of I was on the market.

Tho it really does depend on what functionality is required?

I know it's a selective quote
Just trying to be a little light hearted...

I accept I am being brutally harsh - and typing on a phone doesn't help. I've seen a lot of guys (acquaintances, even friends and family) who are not suitable partners - much more so than the women who have to put up with it. I certainly have sympathy for women in that age group.

EmmetSpiceland · 20-06-2019 07:24PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

The whole Metoo stuff has had a chilling effect on this.

It’s really only had an effect on the type of guy who thinks leering stares, passing ass grabs and cornering drunken young ones are an acceptable way to “break the ice”.

20-06-2019 07:27PM

fash wrote: »

Once you start getting into mid/late thirties, a lot of the"eligible" men have settled down.

A lot of the more stable men don't do very well in their 20s with women so tend to settle down with the first decent one they find. Meanwhile a lot of women in their 20s go after the alcoholic dysfunctional types and then by their 30s look for the more stable option only to find they are mostly gone.

Outlaw Pete · 20-06-2019 07:30PM

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

I approached a woman who was at the bar and just started talking when a fella started shouting at me for trying to chat up his wife!

Same happened to me in Las Vegas of all places. Guy went bonkers but I was doing quite well at the time so I offered him a million dollars for one night with his wife. They told me to get lost at first but returned the next day and agreed. Ultimately he couldn't deal with the fact that she'd enjoyed herself and they broke up. She moved in with me for awhile and the poor chap had a breakdown so I let her go back to him.

20-06-2019 07:32PM

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

It’s really only had an effect on the type of guy who thinks leering stares, passing ass grabs and cornering drunken young ones are an acceptable way to “break the ice”.

Really? I am certainly way more careful talking to women now than I used to be unless I get to know them well. I certainly never did ass grabs or any of that crap.

Most guys I know tell me the same when I talk to them in private. All it takes is some imagined slight to utterly destroy your reputation as a man. Some women think bumping into them in a crowded bar with your back to them is sexual assault. I've had this happen me once, didn't even see the woman in question until she started roaring at me.

fash · 20-06-2019 07:33PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

A lot of the more stable men don't do very well in their 20s with women so tend to settle down with the first decent one they find. Meanwhile a lot of women in their 20s go after the alcoholic dysfunctional types and then by their 30s look for the more stable option only to find they are mostly gone.

It's often to do with the change in the market place - a lot of (or at least some) women up to that age (late 20's) get used to their "invincibility" - there is more demand (from males) than supply ( of females in this age group) - and some of those guys are great fun to be with - there is time to settle down later.

jcorr · 20-06-2019 07:33PM

I just feel like going into a bar like this sometimes and going to a woman:

https://youtu.be/WYGUKCINF_w

fash · 20-06-2019 07:34PM

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

Same happened to me in Las Vegas of all places. Guy went bonkers but I was doing quite well at the time so I offered him a million dollars for one night with his wife. They told me to get lost at first but returned the next day and agreed. Ultimately he couldn't deal with the fact that she'd enjoyed herself and they broke up. She moved in with me for awhile and the poor chap had a breakdown so I let her go back to him.

you should sell your story as a script- I certainly would be interested in seeing that on screen.

How is a Woman supposed to find a Man in the 21st Century

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