Baby showers in Ireland?

SmallgirlBigcity · 12-06-2019 5:22pm #1

Do women in Ireland have baby showers? I'm listening to American podcasts about pregnancy and they are making me wonder if Irish women have baby showers or is it mainly an American thing? Thanks!

Milly33 · 12-06-2019 7:29pm

I had one but a small one nothing too mad.. Had ones for other friends also but again nothing crazy, I doubt somehow it is anything like the Americans.. Recently watched Yummie Mummies on netflix oh tis gas (Oz programme) they keep going on about Push Presents, such a horrible thing to call it. They got rolex watches and Jeeps... Madness

vkus6mt3y8zg2q · 12-06-2019 7:30pm

It's the Instagram generation, of course they have to inflict baby showers on people

shesty · 12-06-2019 7:39pm

It's a very American thing that has spilled over here a bit as far as I can see.There, it seems to be all about buying stuff for the parents, like big things like moses basket, steriliser etc, but here it's a much lesser affair, if it even happens.We tend to give presents after the birth too, so it's a bit much to expect people to stump up twice for gifts.
I know some people who made a date with some friends to go for an afternoon tea somewhere as a "baby shower' - no gifts, just some time out with friends before the arrival.That sits better with me, but then I like cake :-)

whiskeyman · 12-06-2019 7:43pm

Lots of them around the past few years.
Aldi had baby shower decorations in the other week.
I'd reckon it's fairly the norm now.
Gender reveal parties are probably next...

Mam of 4 · 12-06-2019 7:47pm

Milly33 wrote: »

I had one but a small one nothing too mad.. Had ones for other friends also but again nothing crazy, I doubt somehow it is anything like the Americans.. Recently watched Yummie Mummies on netflix oh tis gas (Oz programme) they keep going on about Push Presents, such a horrible thing to call it. They got rolex watches and Jeeps... Madness

Absolutely hilarious series , no one would believe it if you told them !

Baby showers , becoming a big thing around here anyway . Expecting lots of presents on the night , and not just one outfit or gift .

Then expecting more when the baby arrives .

Could put a lot of people under pressure to spend more than they'd like to , especially at the baby shower when everything is opened in front of others .

I just give what I can afford , if it's not up to their expectations , not my problem .

Dial Hard · 12-06-2019 7:54pm

They're definitely majorly on the increase alright, although I've managed to avoid having to go to any so far, thankfully. Americanised nonsense. People can say what they want about not expecting presents but most people will feel obliged to bring one anyway. And then another one when the baby is born and then a Christening present too. I can't stand the practice.

MiliMe · 12-06-2019 8:30pm

shesty wrote: »

I know some people who made a date with some friends to go for an afternoon tea somewhere as a "baby shower' - no gifts, just some time out with friends before the arrival.That sits better with me, but then I like cake :-)

A friend of mine organised this for me as a surprise, they gave me a small basket of baby things - wipes and creams, which was much appreciated and completely unexpected.
Tho i really hate opening gifts in front of people, i find it so freaking awkward.

SmallgirlBigcity · 12-06-2019 8:48pm

I agree with most posters here. It's a nice idea but it does seem a bit much. Especially because we give presents once the baby is born as well. It seems like a lot of pressure to put on people. Thanks for the input because I was wondering what the norm is here

Anne_cordelia · 12-06-2019 11:51pm

I’m firmly in the baby stage for the last 5 years as are most of my peers and none of us either had a shower nor attended one. I think they seem to be more common in Dublin.

Lia_lia · 13-06-2019 12:14am

They are getting very popular. A friend of mine had one last year. I didn’t have one but lots of people asked me was I having one and encourage me to! Wouldn’t be for me. I’d be mortified with all the presents and don’t like fuss in general. Saying that I enjoyed my friend’s one. Just not for me.

JustAThought · 13-06-2019 12:37am

A bit of a sex in the city celtic tiger fad - Often despised and derided and seen as money hungry and tacky. Many I know who had one and had to recriprocate for their friends didn't have one for their second or third. I'd avoid like the plague if I didnt want to piss people off and look greedy..

vicwatson · 13-06-2019 12:47am

Please leave this in America where it belongs with The Kardashians

Saysay19 · 13-06-2019 8:04am

My friend threw me a surprise ‘shower’ 6 years ago. To be honest I was a bit embarrassed when I first realised but as the evening went on it was lovely. My mam helped organise it and she more or less told people no presents as She knew I didn’t like it.

I have been to a few since and are more now like afternoon tea get togethers in hotels.
I’m expecting my second and have warned closest to me I don’t want anything. They are nice for your first but not for second or third and so on....

Now don’t get me started on gender reveal parties!

jlm29 · 13-06-2019 8:05am

I’ve known people to have baby showers, but from what i knew, they weren’t big present giving affairs, more a get together, with games, nibbles etc. That said, I’m sure people didn’t arrive with their hands swinging, so probably did bring along some small gift, as well as buying something after baby was born.
It’s definitely creeping in more and more here now, but it wouldn’t be for me!

NewMom19 · 13-06-2019 9:17am

An in law of mine had a baby shower and there was a list of things that they would like to receive. If they weren't family I would not have gone!! They were asking when is my baby shower, i said it's not really my kind of thing so there won't be one. In fairness it was a lovely day once there and the party itself wasn't over the top as my anxiety had led me to anticipiate, it was just a lovely gathering of lots of her friends, nibbles to eat etc. But I do wonder if an additional gift will be required/expected when their little bundle arrives and then if they have a christening...

PhoenixParker · 13-06-2019 9:21am

They're creeping in over hear. I think we need to fight back. They seem to be universally hated by attendees in the US.

meeeeh · 13-06-2019 9:38am

I've never been to one and I think I'm old enough now to safely assume there won't be any invitations in the post.

I have an issue with it. It's another excuse to sell people more rubbish. We got enough tacky picture frames that we don't use after the birth of kids so I would rather avoid getting them before they are born too. It puts financial pressure on the people and frankly since quite a few of my friends had trouble conceiving or can't have kids the last thing I'd want to do is a party celebrating my pregnancy to rub it in their face.

shesty · 13-06-2019 9:38am

I think they are awful!!I have no problem with a get together with friends, but all the other stuff, I don't like.Funnily enough, most mothers to be don't like them much, and they are definitely more of a first baby thing, than for any subsequent babies.But I think it is too much to ask of people to buy several presents for a new baby, one for a shower, one on arrival and then potentially a christening one-it's ridiculous.Even if they are only small things, it's still too much.

oopsies · 13-06-2019 1:27pm

My sister and sister in law organised a surprise one for me. And my God was I surprised! I really had no clue. It was in a local fancy hotel and we had afternoon tea. 20quid a head and everyone paid for their own. Everyone did bring a small gift, clothes bibs etc. It was a bit awkward opening them! I didn't receive any gifts from the same people after the birth which I was totally ok with. We got plenty from others and we were pretty much all set up at that stage anyway.

I enjoyed it. I don't see it becoming as grabby and elaborate as the American versions, but it was lovely to have an afternoon with a few female friends and family before baby arrived. I'm not someone who likes being in the spotlight so it was a nice size group that came. About 10.

That being said I have told my other half if anyone mentions it to him this time round (I'm 31 weeks), it is a firm NO!

I think its a nice thing to do for your first. Mamas need to be spoilt too! I don't see the harm personally.

NashD · 13-06-2019 1:46pm

I live in Dublin and have never been invited to one or known any of my friends or wider circle to have one. I have met friends for lunch before their baby was due etc. And for close friends I try to give gifts before the baby arrives anyway as I think it's useful to receive blankets etc to have when the baby arrives.
I hate the idea of a "baby shower" but I also hate engagement parties... I'm that kind of person

Think the American concept of them where there is a registered list etc is horrible. Hope it never comes to that here. Although according to the What to Expect app forums grandmother showers are the latest thing in the States....

NashD · 13-06-2019 1:49pm

oopsies wrote: »

I think its a nice thing to do for your first. Mamas need to be spoilt too! I don't see the harm personally.

Totally agree with this - it's nice to make a big deal of being pregnant! On my first I was horrified that people weren't laying down before me when I walked - it's a big deal!!
I have no issue with meeting for food/chats/catchups with a group of friends before the big arrival.
I think my issue is with what the words "baby shower" conjures up!

bertsmom · 13-06-2019 2:06pm

Been invited to three of girls I'm not even proper close friends with just acquaintances really replied no thanks in each case.
I think they are tacky and grabby. I guess being pregnant and having a baby is a very big deal for the close family and friends but to be honest unless I'm very close to some one I wouldn't be a bit interested in giving up an afternoon to go out for afternoon tea and give a gift small or otherwise just because someone is going to have a baby in the near future.
Now if someone has had a new dog or cat join their family from a rescue that's a different story they deserve a massive giftðŸ˜

eviltwin · 13-06-2019 2:07pm

I hate them. Just another way of getting stuff off people and don't get me started on the stupid games.

meeeeh · 13-06-2019 3:37pm

bertsmom wrote: »

Now if someone has had a new dog or cat join their family from a rescue that's a different story they deserve a massive giftðŸ˜

I disagree. They are getting a pet because they want a pet. Everyone can own a pet, that's not hard. Not everyone takes proper care of their pet though. Organising a pet shower would be even more ridiculous.

bertsmom · 13-06-2019 3:44pm

It was a lighthearted comment...hence the smiley face. I wasn't suggesting anybody should organize a pet shower at all as I think the human ones are bad enough!
I was simply saying that I would find a new rescue more deserving of my time or a gift. Anyway dont want to derail the thread so I'm done.

SusieBlue · 13-06-2019 4:07pm

They're becoming increasingly common, I've been to maybe 5/6 over the last 3 years or so.
I think if done tastefully with no expectations they can be a nice get together for family and friends before the arrival of the baby.
But two of the ones I went to had a colour theme with photographers, a flower wall, candy cart etc. and it was way OTT.

One relative in particular had her Gender Reveal on Christmas Eve (which totally took away from the spirit of the night - it was all about her), an extravagant baby shower like the one I outlined above and actually had a Name Reveal a few weeks ago on Easter Sunday.

I'd never been to one, but all the family and friends gathered at her mams house with nibbles & prosecco and she "revealed" the name with icing on a three tier cake and balloons. I wouldn't mind if she'd picked something really unusual and unique but the child is to be called a very common Irish girls name beginning with C and rhyming with Reeva - hardly something to be throwing a party over.

I brought some homemade scones as a gift as I'd already bought presents for the gender reveal and baby shower and she was very unimpressed. Most people actually brought nothing - mainly because no one knew wtf you buy someone to celebrate revealing their childs name! But another gift will be expected when the child is born and for the christening.
I'm so fatigued from hearing about her pregnancy and all her various parties I feel like I'm pregnant myself :pac:

So I think they're fine and a lovely celebration if done tastefully and appropriately, but the mini weddings and various "reveals" are a big fat No from me.

Loveinapril · 13-06-2019 8:34pm

eviltwin wrote: »

I hate them. Just another way of getting stuff off people and don't get me started on the stupid games.

All of this x2.

I think they are just another self indulgent way to get presents from people. I am pregnant on my second child and made it very clear from my first pregnancy that I would leave if one was thrown for me. I have also never been to one. I just couldn't fake enjoyment enough and thankfully my friends get it so wouldn't expect me to.

lazygal · 14-06-2019 9:49am

I hate them. Thankfully in my circle of friends they're just not a thing. I've noticed others do one for the first of a gang to have a baby and then they fizzle out. They're second only to christenings for things I wish would disappear.

theteal · 14-06-2019 9:56am

I assumed they're a common thing these days but in my (very sparse, being a bloke an' all) experience it's the mammy-to-be's friends/sisters that stage it as a kinda surprise thing. Not in any way a new phenomenon

CheerLouth · 14-06-2019 11:39am

I've had two "baby showers" if you could call them that & been to a few. They are mostly just lunch with friends. One of mine was a surprise in my best friends house - thought we were going for a playdate with her kids & then my other friends were there too. It was lovely, no pressure on anyone to spend money, no gifts!

I think it's a nice way to celebrate the mama - but I definitely don't understand gender reveal parties! What is that about?! But then we have never found out the gender of our babies until they arrive! We like the surprise

Baby showers in Ireland?

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