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Baby showers in Ireland?

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 8,036 ✭✭✭ SusieBlue


    CheerLouth wrote: »
    - but I definitely don't understand gender reveal parties! What is that about?! But then we have never found out the gender of our babies until they arrive! We like the surprise :D

    With the gender reveal I went to, we all brought gifts in neutral white/cream/yellow colours as we obviously didn't know the sex prior to the party.
    The day after the party the mum-to-be text everyone looking for gift receipts as she wanted to exchange it all for pink stuff :P


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,318 ✭✭✭ JustAThought


    oopsies wrote: »
    My sister and sister in law organised a surprise one for me. And my God was I surprised! I really had no clue. It was in a local fancy hotel and we had afternoon tea. 20quid a head and everyone paid for their own. Everyone did bring a small gift, clothes bibs etc. It was a bit awkward opening them! I didn't receive any gifts from the same people after the birth which I was totally ok with. We got plenty from others and we were pretty much all set up at that stage anyway.

    I enjoyed it. I don't see it becoming as grabby and elaborate as the American versions, but it was lovely to have an afternoon with a few female friends and family before baby arrived. I'm not someone who likes being in the spotlight so it was a nice size group that came. About 10.

    That being said I have told my other half if anyone mentions it to him this time round (I'm 31 weeks), it is a firm NO!

    I think its a nice thing to do for your first. Mamas need to be spoilt too! I don't see the harm personally.


    10 people at twenty quid a head to go, 10 sets of drinks to be paid for and 10 presents - at least fourty quid each to go. Its a tax on friendship and puts a burden on people that they might not be able to afford it - particularly if they have a few pregnant friends. Hair,nails , outfit, night out,taxi,babysitter. Not to mention when the baby is born and christening gifts which are expected or hoped for too. Sure everyone likes to be spoiled but the bottonless expectation of spending and gifts and lunches or nights out is becoming a significant burden and pressure on couples who might like to spend an occasional non themed night out .land who don't have a bottomless well of cash. It starts with the engagement party, then the stag/hen, 2 day weddings, and edges into baby showers, baby gifts,christening gifts and parties - its an endless churn of expectation and expexted spending. And its never just family. Its the same expectation and tax on friendship over and over.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,993 ✭✭✭ CheerLouth


    SusieBlue wrote: »
    With the gender reveal I went to, we all brought gifts in neutral white/cream/yellow colours as we obviously didn't know the sex prior to the party.
    The day after the party the mum-to-be text everyone looking for gift receipts as she wanted to exchange it all for pink stuff :P

    Oh crikey, that feels a bit rude to me!


  • Registered Users Posts: 220 ✭✭ voldejoie


    I've been to 4 so far this year and have another at the end of June.

    One of them was for a very close friend who sadly lost a baby last year, so her mother organised a small baby shower and it was actually lovely because it was so chill and there weren't too many people there. Her sister had a baby three weeks before so maybe that's why it was a little more subdued :pac: The nice thing was that while there were a few balloons it really was just an evening with a few friends and the ones who already have kids talking about their experiences of pregnancy and motherhood.

    The others were the most Americanised and cynical events I've ever attended. I brought what I genuinely thought to be quite generous gifts but very strongly got the impression that they weren't 'enough'. At one of the showers there were games that reminded me a lot of the kind at hen parties - one of them was where you had to lick a nappy that was covered in melted chocolate and guess which kind of chocolate it was. :rolleyes: There were also professional photographers and waaaay too many people - I went to a baby shower in February with 90 attendees and I honestly think I've been to weddings that were more relaxed! That baby has since been born and of course we've all been out a fortune on gifts for his birth and then later for his christening.

    Moral of the story: there are different kinds of 'baby showers' and they're definitely becoming more and more popular (a cousin of mine is expecting and has been getting a lot of disbelieving reactions when she has said she isn't having one). I think it's nice when the focus is on spending time with people and it's low key, but it can become gaudy and obnoxious pretty quickly.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,510 Mod ✭✭✭✭ shesty


    Gender reveals and name reveals...no.Just no.They are a totally American thing and if someone was having a baby shower, gender reveal and name reveal parties I would be turning down the invitation to two out of three of them.Totally OTT.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 3,281 ✭✭✭ Gatica


    We'd 2 or 3 baby showers for our close group of friends a few years ago as they were the first to have kids. They were organised by friends in a friend's house. We brought small presents, and then gave another after baby was born because it felt awkward visiting them empty-handed. The parties were low key, there were 7 of us maybe, just the girls, there were 2-3 games organised by one of the girls, which were fun tbh, we had nibbles like crisps and cupcakes. It wasn't over the top and it was fun.

    We didn't have any more showers for any of the girls after the first couple of kids as I think everyone just got wrapped up with their own kids and family and didn't have time for organising more for the rest of the group. There weren't any for second kids anyway.

    From other posters' comments, I think having more than one party for the same baby (fetus), is a bit exuberant and demanding. I would be embarrassed for them if they were my friends. TBH I never got the whole thing of surprising people with the gender of your child (we'd friends that knew gender that didn't wanna reveal til baby was born, but they prob didn't realise no one else cared one bit what baby they had, at least I didn't), I think it's a bit self-absorbed. I can see how grandparents would love to know or maybe be surprised instead by gender of your baby but why would anyone else care? We mentioned baby gender if it came up, but never imagined that anyone would be overly excited one way or another. It's not their baby and doesn't affect them really.


  • Registered Users Posts: 87 ✭✭ oopsies


    10 people at twenty quid a head to go, 10 sets of drinks to be paid for and 10 presents - at least fourty quid each to go. Its a tax on friendship and puts a burden on people that they might not be able to afford it - particularly if they have a few pregnant friends. Hair,nails , outfit, night out,taxi,babysitter. Not to mention when the baby is born and christening gifts which are expected or hoped for too. Sure everyone likes to be spoiled but the bottonless expectation of spending and gifts and lunches or nights out is becoming a significant burden and pressure on couples who might like to spend an occasional non themed night out .land who don't have a bottomless well of cash. It starts with the engagement party, then the stag/hen, 2 day weddings, and edges into baby showers, baby gifts,christening gifts and parties - its an endless churn of expectation and expexted spending. And its never just family. Its the same expectation and tax on friendship over and over.

    Jeez don't hold back or anything!!

    There was no additional drinks, outifts etc. at mine. It was v laid back. Just tea and chats. I highly doubt anyone spend even close to 40euro. A good few of the gifts I got were second hand from their own kids!
    As well as that I didn't receive anymore gifts from those friends for the baby, and we don't do Christenings so nothing for that either.

    Friendship doesn't have to involve money! And if its obligatory that it does then you need to have a good look at that friendship!


  • Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,604 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭ Neyite


    I think they are awful, sorry!


    The only time I heard of one that I didn't roll my eyes at was where the theme was books. You were not allowed to bring any other gift except a copy of your favourite childhood book. I really like the idea of sharing the joy you got from a book with a new generation.

    I love books and I read a lot to my son, and in turn, he loves books as well. So I'd say yes to a book shower but not any other kind and certainly not gender reveal stuff.


  • Registered Users Posts: 351 ✭✭ CavanGal


    I am so relieved by the responses on here. I also think they are a load of nonsense. I am 18 weeks pregnant with our first and while its a massive deal to my husband and I and to a lesser extent our families (first grandchild on both sides), I do not expect it to be much more than a blip on the radar of our friends. Yes they will be delighted for us and I'm sure some will give gifts when the baby arrives but that's it.

    I find baby showers so grabby and self involved. I have friends who are trying and friends who are long time single and I think a shower is unfair to both sets. Those who are trying do not need my fertility rubbed in their faces and those who are single have bought engagement presents and been to so many hen parties and weddings in the last few years, that they are out a fortune.

    Some friends have mentioned a lunch before the baby comes and that would be lovely but any shower mention will be nipped in the bud immediately. I've already told my sisters this.

    Anyway rant over before I start on gender reveals :D


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