What do you do when you feel sad?

Ariadne · 27-03-2019 12:57AM #1

So folks, as the title says. What do you do when you feel sad or lonely? I'm in one of those moods where it feels like no matter what I do I'll still feel completely alone in this world, unable to connect to another human. Does this happen to all of us at times? How do you comfort yourself? I seem to spend my whole life trying to distract myself to stop myself from feeling anything. Anything to fill the hole (heh). The void.

dartboardio · 27-03-2019 01:02AM

Nothing.

I just keep doing what I'm doing and every few minutes I remember I'm feeling kinda sad.. Continue doing what I'm doing and then whenever it's gone it's gone.

Which is a good or a bad thing i dunno. I don't dwell on it anymore so i guess that's good

I suppose if I had to do something I'd get into my cosiest pair of pyjamas with a hot water bottle and force myself asleep. Sleep is the best cure!

Or watch a funny movie, distract myself with an interesting film or youtube video.

Eat my favourite food maybe.

I rarely connect with people either but I've gotten used to it. Ive grown distant from everyone I generally know and usually am just glued to one person, which is my partner the last few years.

Its weird for me say in work when people started working there after me and you see them all forming friendships and bonding with the people i struggle to move past the formality with, even though i should be and do get on with them. Like I have a mental block at times maybe.

Its embarassing, maybe i just think into it too much. Trying to be more positive these days rather than thinking the world is out to get me.

bassy · 27-03-2019 01:05AM

get on with it.

Ariadne · 27-03-2019 01:06AM

Sometimes I try to just wait it out, read something or do something to try to forget but sometimes I don't have the concentration for it. I find it difficult to sleep then too. Food is a big distraction and alcohol and sex and talking.

dartboardio · 27-03-2019 01:08AM

This might sound cringe but yeah years ago when I was really depressed most of the time i used to mAsTUrbate a lot of the time (cant believe i just said that)

Of course alcohol but thats **** cause i associate alcohol with fun not sadness. Yay!

27-03-2019 01:09AM

Yeah, I don't know really.. I feel like that regularly enough, and like, sometimes I'll listen to more depressing music, and sometimes I just kind of wait for it to blow over..I used to think it would all kind of work out eventually, but I struggle to think that now.. hope you are ok..

shaneon77 · 27-03-2019 01:10AM

Bob Marley and the wailers - Don't rock my boat.
After that I just get lost in their back catalogue.

Tell me how · 27-03-2019 01:11AM

Yes, I think it definitely happens everyone from time to time. Some people do seem to be able to push through it nearly like it doesn't affect them but if they do I think they pay for it in other ways.

My tools for this?
Text a friend and tell him we should meet up next week.
Watch a sure fire easy watching comedy. It's always Sunny in Philadelphia is practically medication for me in this way.
Try to sleep it off. Seriously, some days I know I'm off and I try deliberately to get a long deep sleep that night.
Exercise (not a clear option for you maybe), But an hour or two out on the bike is very helpful.
Visit my parents because I'll get a greeting from the dog like I've just returned from a 2 year excursion with a bag of treats for him.

dartboardio · 27-03-2019 01:11AM

Fleetwood mac - the chain

Has filled me with love and sadness today for some reason!

And nick cave - red right hand

Baron Kurtz · 27-03-2019 01:15AM

dartboardio wrote: »

This might sound cringe but yeah years ago when I was really depressed most of the time i used to mAsTUrbate a lot of the time (cant believe i just said that)

Of course alcohol but thats **** cause i associate alcohol with fun not sadness. Yay!

Cranking, I think it's called.

Ariadne · 27-03-2019 01:19AM

Thanks for the replies everyone and for letting me know how ye cope.

@Dartboardio I actually do find masturbating relaxes me when I'm anxious or struggling to go to sleep!

@CQD, I tend to listen to depressing music too when I just want to give in to it and stop fighting how I feel.

@Tell Me How, I'm planning on going for a walk, and I'll see if a friend of mine is free for a coffee at the weekend. I just seem to have fallen into a hole but I'll get out again. Maybe book flights to go and see my cat and get my animal fix

Prominent_Dawg · 27-03-2019 01:22AM

You're definitely not alone, we all feel like this at times.. I find podcasts are a good way of relaxing and switching off

27-03-2019 01:22AM

I put on a song that lifts my mood.

Your Face · 27-03-2019 02:08AM

I listen to Hulk Hogan's theme song.

I'm not joking.

NSAman · 27-03-2019 02:10AM

Watch Long Lost Family on YouTube.

Nothing like a happy onion peeling session to cheer you up...

Rubberchikken · 27-03-2019 02:16AM

i simply remember my favourite things and then i dont feel so bad...

so raindrops.on roses
whiskers on kittens..you know how it goes:)

RobertKK · 27-03-2019 02:25AM

dartboardio wrote: »

This might sound cringe but yeah years ago when I was really depressed most of the time i used to mAsTUrbate a lot of the time (cant believe i just said that)

Of course alcohol but thats **** cause i associate alcohol with fun not sadness. Yay!

Don't worry, people who say they don't are liars...

I also listen to music.

Yer Da sells Avon · 27-03-2019 02:25AM

I eat lots of food. And if that doesn't work, I eat more food. And then I start thinking about the sheer amount of food I've just eaten and I get even more depressed. So I eat even more food. It's a delicious vicious circle.

Watching comedy is another thing that I've always used as a crutch, ever since I was a miserable teenager. The more mindless, the better. And if that fails, there's always YouTube compilation videos of Russian car crashes, classic scenes from '90s soaps, and giant dogs interacting with babies.

I hope you feel better soon.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts · 27-03-2019 02:26AM

Go somewhere private and cry. I avoid public waterworks but a good private cry is a very cathartic thing. And I am often able to think more clearly about what’s making me sad after a good cry too.

Gimme A Pound · 27-03-2019 03:05AM

Remember how good I have it. I know this isn't easy for a person who has clinical depression or who is going through extremely difficult times, but for run of the mill feeling down, I find having perspective a huge help.

Arghus · 27-03-2019 03:34AM

Depends on what is I feel sad about.

Mister Vain · 27-03-2019 04:09AM

Sometimes I lift weights or go for a run. Those endorphins are great. I find running in particular really clears my head. Although it can be hard on the joints.

Beanntraigheach · 27-03-2019 04:45AM

I try to get absorbed in a good, interesting film.
A comedy film wouldn't work for me at all as the contrast between the tone of the film and how I'm feeling would just worsen my mood

But getting drawn into the 'world' of a really engaging, rich story ('Goodfellas' is a recent example) takes me out of my own problems to some extent, for a couple of hours anyway.

Ariadne · 27-03-2019 08:41AM

Thanks for the suggestions everyone

I decided to go with listening to a "sad song" compilation on Spotify until I fell asleep! There are good parts to After Hours

Cina · 27-03-2019 08:46AM

Always found exercise really helped. Takes your mind off it, gets the endorphins releasing, and you feel better about yourself for having done it.

Plopsu · 27-03-2019 09:48AM

Pick one of two paths. Either fight it off (distraction, exercise, etc.) or dive in (sad movie, music) and let it burn itself out. Option two is often a good idea. Sadness is like a fart; holding it in doesn't improve the situation.

biko · 27-03-2019 09:51AM

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Deebles McBeebles · 27-03-2019 09:51AM

Hasn't been mentioned here but housework can really distract you. Or doing something in the garden. Walking the dog gets you out of your own head too.

But yeah, mainly music and anything to escape for a little bit, like a good documentary.

Wibbs · 27-03-2019 09:57AM

Giselle Better Cigar wrote: »

Remember how good I have it. I know this isn't easy for a person who has clinical depression or who is going through extremely difficult times, but for run of the mill feeling down, I find having perspective a huge help.

This. When hundreds of millions of people today on this planet are going to bed hungry, if they even have a bed, I look at my life at its worst and thank pure dumb luck for my situation.

Tom Mann Centuria · 27-03-2019 10:02AM

Off topic but I loved how Pixar described sadness in Inside Out.

Tell me how · 27-03-2019 10:05AM

Wibbs wrote: »

This. When hundreds of millions of people today on this planet are going to bed hungry, if they even have a bed, I look at my life at its worst and thank pure dumb luck for my situation.

That might imply that feeling sad is linked with selfishness. That is not necessarily the case. Many might have that sense of sadness because of their empathy and awareness towards others as opposed to solely being focused inwardly.

Watching the news today (as ever) can be a difficult task made more so because of peoples awareness as to how lucky they have it and this can in itself be a root cause for low feelings.

Just yesterday there was a horrific story about an event at a hospital in Cork. That saddened me and I spent time thinking about it throughout the evening.

What do you do when you feel sad?

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