Terrible interviews

bear1 · 26-02-2019 05:52PM #1

Just had a fecking nightmare of an interview which I admit was my own doing.
I was contacted by a recruiter for the position of team leader in one of the big banks.
Told me to send my cv and the managers would review and get back to me.
So I uploaded the cv and sent it on.
Within an hour I had the interview set up.
Went in and the interviewer started to ask about my cv.
I began talking about my past experiences and dates, the interviewer looks confused.
He then stops me and says "there isn't anything about this on the cv".
"Err it should be there"
"Nope"
So he sighs and asks me to give him my experience so he can work out the dates.
I get flustered and desperately tried to remember the exact dates.
I apologies and advised that I obviously sent the cv incorrectly, to which he gets slightly snotty.
Went on with the interview and did the best I could but seems I fecked that up nice and good.
So... ah'ers, what say ye? Anything to make me feel better?

Pauliedragon · 26-02-2019 05:56PM

Did he not read the cv before calling you for an interview?

Outlaw Pete · 26-02-2019 05:57PM

I just get pure shy with the interviewer, cats. I get all nervous and I can't answer any of their questions.

ELM327 · 26-02-2019 05:57PM

you went from 1 hour ago uploading your CV to interviewing?
They obviously didn't prep.

beejee · 26-02-2019 06:01PM

Outlaw Pete wrote: »

I just get pure shy with the interviewer, cats. I get all nervous and I can't answer any of their questions.

You were interviewed by multiple cats, posing as one entity? Were they all sellotaped together?

bear1 · 26-02-2019 06:09PM

ELM327 wrote: »

you went from 1 hour ago uploading your CV to interviewing?
They obviously didn't prep.

Sorry, was called on Friday and today the interview.
Desperate I suppose.

Your Face · 26-02-2019 06:10PM

bear1 wrote: »

Sorry, was called on Friday and today the interview.
Desperate I suppose.

I'd say so.

Fr_Dougal · 26-02-2019 06:10PM

What are your strengths?
Attention to detail.

Ten of Swords · 26-02-2019 06:13PM

Santan · 26-02-2019 06:13PM

Ray Darcy just said "hold my beer".

Outlaw Pete · 26-02-2019 06:16PM

beejee wrote: »

You were interviewed by multiple cats, posing as one entity? Were they all sellotaped together?

Yeah, cool. Whatever you say.

You're the dude in the chair.

I am merely here.

26-02-2019 06:17PM

"Tell me a little about yourself."

"Well, it all started before electricity..."

road_high · 26-02-2019 06:17PM

Ten of Swords wrote: »

That’s fecking brilliant, laughed out loud at that one!

road_high · 26-02-2019 06:19PM

I think the fact the cv didn’t match works against you on several levels- attention to detail and preparation clearly lacking.
Also credibility in that you couldn’t talk ad lib which makes the interviewer wonder if any of it is even true.
Also bring a copy of your cv, you should have it in front of you and know it in detail.

Signore Fancy Pants · 26-02-2019 06:24PM

Did you not picture them naked?

Thats where you fell down.

Force Carrier · 26-02-2019 06:30PM

'What's your greatest weakness"? should never be answered with "chocolate"

crustyjuggler · 26-02-2019 06:31PM

bear1 wrote: »

Just had a fecking nightmare of an interview which I admit was my own doing.
I was contacted by a recruiter for the position of team leader in one of the big banks.
Told me to send my cv and the managers would review and get back to me.
So I uploaded the cv and sent it on.
Within an hour I had the interview set up.
Went in and the interviewer started to ask about my cv.
I began talking about my past experiences and dates, the interviewer looks confused.
He then stops me and says "there isn't anything about this on the cv".
"Err it should be there"
"Nope"
So he sighs and asks me to give him my experience so he can work out the dates.
I get flustered and desperately tried to remember the exact dates.
I apologies and advised that I obviously sent the cv incorrectly, to which he gets slightly snotty.
Went on with the interview and did the best I could but seems I fecked that up nice and good.
So... ah'ers, what say ye? Anything to make me feel better?

What exactly attracts you to the leisure industry?”

bodhrandude · 26-02-2019 06:39PM

This Aphex Twin interview from 1994 comes to mind, god knows whats going on in the Russian interviewer's mind.

:pac:

Lorelli! · 26-02-2019 06:41PM

Hard luck op if you don't get the job.

I think its good to bring in a copy of your own CV for yourself that you can use for reference or even just to hold and glance at during awkward moments.

I can't remember anything too bad except going to a recruiter where I wasn't prepared at all. At the time I was thinking of it as just a chat and didn't treat it as an interview at all. Can't remember exactly what I said but I was too honest and got a few weird looks from him.

DopeTech · 26-02-2019 06:52PM

In general I'm terrible at selling myself so I'm terrible at all the typical interview questions.

Had a few interviews before my last job that were trainwrecks either because I froze when asked a question or because I hadn't prepared for their questions. In one interview I had 4 people intervieing me in a small room almost I'm a semi circle. It was more of a grilling than an interview. Thankfully I got a job in the end which I really enjoy and pays better than all the others I interviewed for so it was their loss!

The key is to prepare but also treat each interview separately. They won't all be terrible. Some interviews can be nice people too!

pleas advice · 26-02-2019 06:56PM

Parkinson interviewing Meg Ryan was one..

JustAThought · 26-02-2019 07:09PM

Lucky you - getting an interview onna one day turnaround - your cv must be good - you mwver know it might have gone well - unterciewers who can only ask what month and day from q0 or 15 years of detailed synopses should be retured to man the uswage of cups in the office waterfont - its about as meaningful and as much a waste of the companys time in paying them a salary

Church on Tuesday · 26-02-2019 07:25PM

beejee wrote: »

You were interviewed by multiple cats, posing as one entity? Were they all sellotaped together?

Ah that's cat altogether.

petes · 26-02-2019 07:40PM

JustAThought wrote: »

Lucky you - getting an interview onna one day turnaround - your cv must be good - you mwver know it might have gone well - unterciewers who can only ask what month and day from q0 or 15 years of detailed synopses should be retured to man the uswage of cups in the office waterfont - its about as meaningful and as much a waste of the companys time in paying them a salary

Did you upload their cv?

Ficheall · 26-02-2019 08:04PM

I've had multiple interviews where I've either decided mid-interview that I didn't want the job, or decided I couldn't do the job, and just panicked, and asked to end the interview.

One such instance was an interview for a postdoc, which I was just doing for much-needed practice - 'twas via phone and there were three of them at the other end, which I hadn't expected. The only guy who spoke was Chinese and that, combined with the poor connection on my mobile, made what he was saying almost completely unintelligible.
I did manage to work out that I had neither any relevant experience or knowledge, and that the position didn't really sound like my cup of tea. I couldn't answer their questions about what I hoped to bring to the table, and the final straw was when I found myself unable to a fairly basic question about the software I'd worked on for my phd, so I said
"Look guys, this isn't going very well, but thanks for your time..."
The interviewer insisted that we drag things out for a couple more minutes, but things didn't really improve, save for my relief at having the pressure off.

True story.

Then they offered me the job, and that is how I ended up spending nearly two years working in the University of Birmingham, never really figuring out what exactly I was supposed to be doing.

I have, of course, made up for it since, by failing many times to get jobs which I would definitely be good at.

Vela · 26-02-2019 08:18PM

If it was a recruiter they might have been putting pressure on you to see how you'd act in a job interview. Recruiters are also told to get a minimum number of interviews a day to build up their books, even when they don't always have an actual position, so it's likely the person didn't pay much attention to your CV before getting you in.

somesoldiers · 26-02-2019 08:28PM

I got one of those “is there anything you dislike” curve balls once, I said I didn’t like computers, interview was for an Insurance company.

In fairness, it was only an 8 week internship/ summer thing... I was only a young fella, still in college and they had just recently introduced downloadable lecture notes, I could never seem to log in.

Didn’t really want the job anyhow was having too much fun working in a City Centre pub

26-02-2019 09:06PM

I had an interview last week. I'd usually be pretty hard on myself for any little error I make in those situations but This time everything went perfect. Couldnt fault myself. I answered everything really well (I was told this during and after the interview) , I got on really well with the interviewer and even cracked some inoffensive little joke which he laughed at.

.......I didn't get the job.

Likewise, I've gotten offered stuff after doing what I thought were terrible interviews in the past.

Maybe they'll give you a 2nd chance to prove yourself. If not, f*ck it. Learn and move on. There will be other opportunities.

good luck!

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1 · 26-02-2019 09:14PM

JustAThought wrote: »

Lucky you - getting an interview onna one day turnaround - your cv must be good - you mwver know it might have gone well - unterciewers who can only ask what month and day from q0 or 15 years of detailed synopses should be retured to man the uswage of cups in the office waterfont - its about as meaningful and as much a waste of the companys time in paying them a salary

petes wrote: »

Did you upload their cv?

And run it through a spell check first.

26-02-2019 09:14PM

I got asked once about my Master's Thesis and I couldn't remember what it was about. Couldn't even remember what it was called!

Tbh I'm struggling to remember anything about it now.....

road_high · 26-02-2019 09:22PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I got asked once about my Master's Thesis and I couldn't remember what it was about. Couldn't even remember what it was called!
Tbh I'm struggling to remember anything about it now.....

I hate that about interviews- they can go back over ten years and focus on some relatively insignificant aspect of work or education that you’ve long since buried in the back of your mind and you struggle to string two sentences together about it...despite having a plethora of far more relevant and trying experience since then- they want to talk about something that’s virtually irrelevant to the present day!

Terrible interviews

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