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do you look at porn?

30-08-2003 07:12PM

#1

Memnoch

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I'm not sure if it belongs on this board but couldn't think of anywhere else to put it.

Anyways had a stupid arguement with my gf about it so i'm wondering...

HOw often do u guys look at porn?
Do any guys who have gf's ever look at porn? DO ur gf's mind?
Do any girls look at porn?
Do any girls that are in a relationship look at porn? Do ur partner's mind?

How do girls feel about their boyfriends occasionaly/rarely looking at porn, provided their bf's still fancied them a lot and shagged them on a regular basis?

Just trying to get some honest info here for a prob of mine cause i'm kinda confused....
be nice pls :P

p.s. really looking for input from girls here aswell

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#2 30-08-2003 07:17PM

Typedef

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Originally posted by Memnoch

How do girls feel about their boyfriends occasionaly/rarely looking at porn, provided their bf's still fancied them a lot and shagged them on a regular basis?

Girls look at porn too...

Besides, how do men feel when they see their girlfriend drooling over some himbo on TV?

Quid pro quo. Give up the himbos and we'll give up the porn.[1]

[1] Lie

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#3 30-08-2003 07:21PM

Memnoch

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pardon me ignorance but whats a himbo?

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#4 30-08-2003 07:26PM

Typedef

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Bimbo : Silicon chick

Himbo : (Shurg) TV types women drool over. I dunno, some of the guys, girlfriends of mine lust after from the TV are pretty damn unattractive in my book.... but, still, no accounting for a complete lack of taste on that front.

Himbo : Prince what's his face in England.
Himbo : Justin Timber_what's_name
Himbo : Westlife (especially the fat one)

You know.. general public eye male moron, lust figures of varying degrees of (a) actual attractiveness (b) heterosexuality (which doesn't stop throngs of girlies fancying them... aka Stephen Gately) (c) Intelligence (d) Ability to walk without dragging knuckles along the ground (Robbie Williams).

Himbo.

[Back on topic]

Yes I look at occasional porn.
In fact, I'd say most women look at either (a) porn or (b) boybands for the same effect.

Quite a few couples look at porn too I'd suspect. There's nothing wrong with looking at porn... but, of course the pron industry is predicated on all sorts of exploitative methods, so I suppose upon analysis.. watching porn is probably immoral.

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#5 30-08-2003 07:32PM

Memnoch

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cool thanks for explaining the lingo, come on peeps if ur reading the thread post ur opinion pls
especially u girls i know ur out there

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#6 30-08-2003 07:33PM

skipn_easy

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girls do look at porn also, why wouldn't they? I wouldn't have a problem if a bf of mine was looking at porn as long as its not ALL the time. I'd probably look with him

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#7 30-08-2003 07:37PM

Memnoch

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my gf is of the opinion that if i look at porn then she should be allowed to flirt with guys online and cyber with them. Maybe I'm being obtuse as a guy or something.. but the two just don't seem to correlate here.

I mean I don't mind if she looked at porn or whatever, i'd think it was cool... anyways...

I welcome more comments and continued enlightenment on this issue pls

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#8 30-08-2003 07:49PM

skipn_easy

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yea, i don't really think cybering with guys online is comparative to looking at porn. I wouldn't be ok with that, but if thats the way she thinks than i guess you'll have to come up with a compromise where you're both happy and comfortable with the situation.

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#9 30-08-2003 07:52PM

Typedef

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Originally posted by Memnoch
my gf is of the opinion that if i look at porn then she should be allowed to flirt with guys online and cyber with them.

Boy are you getting hosed!

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#10 30-08-2003 07:59PM

Memnoch

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Originally posted by Typedef
Boy are you getting hosed!

heh its not like that
She is a really cool girl and we get along great, but she is very possessive and can get kinda jealous, so we have hit a little snag on this issue. I'm just trying to see if looking at porn is as evil in the opinions of all women as she makes it out to be etc. Tbh I don't mind giving up looking at porn, its not something I do very often, maybe once a week for a short while. I dunno its strange, even when I'm having sex on a regular basis, I sometimes get the urge to look at porn... kinda wierd I guess.

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#11 30-08-2003 08:07PM

bugler

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No it isn't. Just because you're having sex with person A doesn't mean you should not want to stop looking at pictures/videos of various other unattainable persons.

Your girlfriend is going to boil your bunny.

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#12 30-08-2003 08:16PM

Memnoch

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sorry agian but whats "boil ur bunny" ?

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#13 30-08-2003 08:42PM

skittishkitten

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Yessssssss , Girls look at porn , at least those with high sex drives do

There is nothing wrong with watching / looking at porn as long as your not doing it constantly or wanting us to look like "them" .

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#14 30-08-2003 08:59PM

Mercury_Tilt

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This post has been deleted.

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#15 30-08-2003 09:13PM

Fry

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well it think all girls love soft-porn, its was they cant c that turns them on. Guys have to see the hard-stuff really...
Thats why they love all that romantic sh/te....:D

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#16 30-08-2003 09:25PM

sceptre

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Originally posted by Memnoch
sorry agian but whats "boil ur bunny" ?

Go watch Fatal Attraction.

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#17 30-08-2003 09:32PM

Mercury_Tilt

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This post has been deleted.

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#18 30-08-2003 09:34PM

Memnoch

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Memnoch's GF here... my take on this....

well the way I see it... my b/f is looking at pics of porn stars... whom he fancies at some level... and I'm often solicited to give my opinion about them as well!

As I see it...there are girls out there whom he finds attractive...a lot of the time when I'm asleep I see him drooling over the pics of these ladies...why can't I find other fellows attractive too and act on it like he does. The only difference is I'm not really into looking at porn because it basically treats people like objects...which turns me off every time. I have to know SOMETHING about a guy before I can find him the least bit attractive...something that can only happen if I actually TALK to this guy...cyber with him I guess.

If guys can fantasize about girls other than their g/f...I guess girls should be allowed to do the same...its not your fault if a guy has to have some kind of intelligence to turn you on...as opposed to being a face and a body in an artificially contrived pose on a screen!!

And very very importantly... fidelity is important to me too... i wouldn't ever cheat on my b/f in real life..ever

Memnoch's GF (Anonymous)

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#19 30-08-2003 09:42PM

bugler

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Fair enough, but I think you need to understand that this interaction with other guys is a lot more 'serious' than your boyf's looking at mere pictures. If you're allowed to talk/cyber with other guys online, you're a hypocrite for not allowing him to do the same in my opinion. Can't be having double standards in a relationship, leads to all sorts of trouble. Mild trouble here...but you could extend it to "well I should be allowed to go with other guys/girls occasionally because my sex drive is really high and I get bored, but my girlf/boyf can't because (s)he doesn't have a high drive and is happy with one person alone".

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#20 30-08-2003 09:43PM

Memnoch

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Originally posted by Memnoch
Memnoch's GF here... my take on this....

well the way I see it... my b/f is looking at pics of porn stars... whom he fancies at some level... and I'm often solicited to give my opinion about them as well!

As I see it...there are girls out there whom he finds attractive...a lot of the time when I'm asleep I see him drooling over the pics of these ladies...why can't I find other fellows attractive too and act on it like he does. The only difference is I'm not really into looking at porn because it basically treats people like objects...which turns me off every time. I have to know SOMETHING about a guy before I can find him the least bit attractive...something that can only happen if I actually TALK to this guy...cyber with him I guess.

If guys can fantasize about girls other than their g/f...I guess girls should be allowed to do the same...its not your fault if a guy has to have some kind of intelligence to turn you on...as opposed to being a face and a body in an artificially contrived pose on a screen!!

And very very importantly... fidelity is important to me too... i wouldn't ever cheat on my b/f in real life..ever

Memnoch's GF (Anonymous)

boy it feels wierd to be quoting my own post, though since my gf typed it using my login it isn't really my post

Anyways.. I just wanted to clarify one or two things in regards to what she said.

The only reason I ask for her opinion and stuff in regards to porn is because its not something I consider should be behind her back or anything (since i know she's against it, and I didn't agree with her take on it). I wanted to try and involve her and be open about it.

I don't see how she can say that its okay to cyber online with guys but that fidelity is important to her. That seems like a contradiction and a paradox. Maybe some ladies out there reading this can translate that for me and tell me how cybering is the same as looking at porn?

P.s. just tell me what "boil ur bunny" means? I cba watching fatal attraction.

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#21 30-08-2003 09:50PM

Memnoch

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Originally posted by bugler
Fair enough, but I think you need to understand that this interaction with other guys is a lot more 'serious' than your boyf's looking at mere pictures. If you're allowed to talk/cyber with other guys online, you're a hypocrite for not allowing him to do the same in my opinion. Can't be having double standards in a relationship, leads to all sorts of trouble. Mild trouble here...but you could extend it to "well I should be allowed to go with other guys/girls occasionally because my sex drive is really high and I get bored, but my girlf/boyf can't because (s)he doesn't have a high drive and is happy with one person alone".

i think u might have gotten a bit confused there. Basically she doesn't consider cybering to be cheating, and she is okay with me cybering with girls as well. But personally I'm not okay with it, because I do think that cybering is cheating, since its more "serious" as you pointed out and not really like porn which is different.

I think u have to draw the line somewhere, and I think that line stops where another person becomes involved such as cybering or flirting with someone else.

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#22 30-08-2003 09:56PM

Victor

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This was going to happen sooner or later so check this out.

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#23 30-08-2003 09:59PM

bugler

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Ah I see. The way one of your initial posts was phrased it seemed that she was saying that for you to watch porn she'd have to be able to cyber, and they were directly linked.

In that case I think it's even clearer cut. If you're not comfortable with her cybering then you have to say so, and if you feel strongly enough about it then request that it stops. Unfortunately this can also be applied in reverse...and if she feels the same way bout porn then she should do the same. But it seems she doesn't actually have too much of a problem with it...so you should not be robbed of your god-given right as a man to love the porn.

This is a perfect example of too much communication in a relationship. You could both have gone behind eac others backs and things would be fine

And basically the rabbit gets boiled by the psycho obsessive lady, which was the reason I made the jest when you suggested your girlf was possessive/jealous.

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#24 30-08-2003 10:46PM

skittishkitten

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I'm surprised that your girlfriend see's cybering as OK and porn as bad. Personally I would be hurt if the person I was involved with emotionally would be wanting to cyber other people , I would hope that he would not want me to do so either. I've cybered people and have made some great friends doing so but I also tend to get emotionally attached to them. Funny thing is over the years I have basically stopped cybering as I would not want the one I'm emotionally involved with to feel that I have "cheated" on him. A couple of my "cyber regulars" have become great friends , we laugh , we talk , we tease but we no longer cyber , it's pretty much a mutual decision as they now have lady friends that they do not want to hurt , just as I dont want to offer hurt the man I'm attached to . To me those that cyber are seeking satisfaction on an emotional level.

Porn is not interacting with other people , if anything it is merely a means to seeking relief . It's fun to watch and can offer some great instruction for interesting things to try. As long as you don't get to attached to your hand , or push your girl to far with "trying things" you have seen , then where is the harm ? Personally I HATE soft porn , I probably have a hardcore collection that would put most guys porn collection to shame.

Oh and Merc ( and that is Merc only ).....if you need links to free porn sites I know of at least three Drop me a line I can send them your way Their updated daily

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#25 30-08-2003 11:32PM

skipn_easy

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I don't think his gf thinks cybering is ok and porn is bad, its more a case of if porn is ok, then so is cybering - shes lumping the two in the same bracket.

I'd agree with bugler, and just tell each other what you're not comfortable with.

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#26 31-08-2003 12:36AM

karma kabbage

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I would have thought that the argument that 'if you can do THAT, then I can do THIS' is something irrelevant. Would the gf in question want to do the cybering at all if it were not for the fact that she is upset (on some level) that her bf is looking at other women (i assume women)?!

Personally I wouldn't have a problem with it as I see it as harmless and if there is porn goin' I'm game to watch too, I also reckon cybering is crossing another line. But this girl clearly does!

I think if my bf had issues with me & porn I would question why he is so insecure and perhaps if he REALLY doesn't wanna join in and he meant THAT much to me, maybe I'd cut down or (dare I say it) quit!!! But then I'm not in that situ!

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#27 31-08-2003 01:29AM

sReq | uTeK

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Firstly I would like to start with thanks bit to **** for the single life after being tied down for 2 years its great to not have to deal with the little but incessive arguments like these

on a side note

girls do look at porn also, why wouldn't they? I wouldn't have a problem if a bf of mine was looking at porn as long as its not ALL the time. I'd probably look with him

^^will you marry me please

Basically I say get a divorce nah seriously it is a trivial argument which could have been resolved easily ie both of you should have hushed there is times when silence is always the best option

As to paying for a porn site lmfao @ that bs if you want me to set you up with a few porn sites user/password as well then no worries but you really need dsl to get the best streaming action

woot come on dsl in 2 weeks

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#28 31-08-2003 02:00AM

Lukin Black

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Porn is just looking at flesh, but cybering, it's the same as going out and finding someone for a one night stand, just without the contact.

My 2c anyhow.

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#29 31-08-2003 02:06AM

Moriarty

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Originally posted by Typedef
<snip>.. girlfriends of mine.. <snip>.... but, still, no accounting for a complete lack of taste <snip>

Aye, ill say.

Back on topic, every bloke with the net looks at copius amounts of porn. They might even deny it, but they still do. Actually, the ones that deny it are probably the sort that are into the gas-mask fetishes..

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#30 31-08-2003 02:33AM

Sarky

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Well, I don't look at all that much porn.

Then again, I have been stuck with a lousy 56K connection for a very long time...

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#31 31-08-2003 03:27AM

bug

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I kinda look at porn this way as far as my b/f is concerned. I like vice city although wouldn't sit and play it for hours straight to see how far I could get. It just doesn't appeal to me in the same way.

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