Cultural or what is it.

mariaalice wrote: »

I know this has come up before anyway anyone got a straight up answer why some people have their children partake in communion and confirmation despite never attending church themselves. Was in a church beside a couple who fidgeted sighed and sat down the whole time with there arms folded while what I presume was their daughter took part. They couldn't have looked less happy or interested in being there if they tried.

Why do they need the legitimacy of the church to throw a party why not just buy her the white dress and have a party and call it something else.

I am sure they were fussing and fidgeting and sighing when the relatives were handing over a lot of moolah to their kid. First communions and confirmations are all about coining it.

A friend of mine is a teacher and a girl in her class didn't show up for her Holy Communion. She said to her on Monday that she was sorry she missed it and the girl said no she didn't. It turns out she was at home getting ready and just missed the church bit, but they got to the hotel / restaurant okay, which was the important thing.

In a way it's kind of like Christmas in that it not about the religious side of it to a lot of people. To a lot of people it is about the dress and the meal and the party.

Why?

They fear the hell.

Satan is real and they know it.

mariaalice wrote: »

Why do they need the legitimacy of the church to throw a party why not just buy her the white dress and have a party and call it something else.

There's your mistake.

If you are an unbeliever (like myself) the church is really just the venue, albeit one with a lot of attached baggage, but it offers no more or less "legitimacy" than a hotel. If the whole class planned to have a big party in a random hotel where they dressed up as an alien and promised allegiance to zurg the galactic overlord, they'd probably end up doing just that, just because everyone else was.
I have young kids (pre school) and older kids (post school) The older ones made their communion + confo the younger ones almost certainly will - largely because their mother (also an unbeliever) just wants them too - who knows why, she certainly can't explain it when asked, some ill though out bollox about feeling left out is the best she can come up with (bitches be crazy and all that). I don't think any of them have seen the inside of a church other than on those days except for a funeral or wedding.

I'm just all about the quite life - I just don't care enough about making a stand on the issue to listen to repeated bouts of my missus moaning at me over it! It's far easier to just sit there for an hour, take a few photos and then go about my business.

eeguy wrote: »

Try telling some 8 year old she can't dress up like a princess and get loads of money with the rest of her class.

If they moved preparation for communion and confirmation to outside school time then you wouldn’t have to explain to an 8 year old about it.

Having preparation for it take time away from teaching actual useful subjects is ridiculous.

There was a priest in Enniscorthy that attempted to bar non mass attending parents from confirmations a few weeks ago.
Can only assume he had his wings clipped by management. Haven't heard a squeak since.

Sleepy wrote: »

It's mainly a result of the majority of our education system still being in the clutches of the Catholic Church. Were so many parents not forced to keep up the pretence of Catholicism in order to get their children educated and such sacraments were being organised, prepared for and run in a Sunday School type arrangement rather than by publicly paid teachers during the school day, they'd largely fall by the wayside.

Yes of course the RCC frogmarched them down to the church all dressed up like dogs dinners...it’s very unfair to accuse these victims of bullies of hypocrisy ...

mariaalice wrote: »

People are missing my point there are naming ceremonies for babies so how come there are not new ceremonies for those who are not religious but want something to base the dressing up and party around.

This is a great idea it is a 'religious community' for nonbelievers and atheists.

http://nationbuilder.sundayassembly.com/manchester

Ah but you wouldn’t have the lovely stained glass windows in the pictures or the fun water pouring bit, or the candle lighting bit... wouldn’t the pictures on Facebook look a bit odd?

o1s1n wrote: »

Social pressure and the need to conform.

Otherwise known as having neither a backbone or a mind of your own, or in a lot of cases, abject hypocrisy .

sbsquarepants wrote: »

There's your mistake.

If you are an unbeliever (like myself) the church is really just the venue, albeit one with a lot of attached baggage, but it offers no more or less "legitimacy" than a hotel. If the whole class planned to have a big party in a random hotel where they dressed up as an alien and promised allegiance to zurg the galactic overlord, they'd probably end up doing just that, just because everyone else was.
I have young kids (pre school) and older kids (post school) The older ones made their communion + confo the younger ones almost certainly will - largely because their mother (also an unbeliever) just wants them too - who knows why, she certainly can't explain it when asked, some ill though out bollox about feeling left out is the best she can come up with (bitches be crazy and all that). I don't think any of them have seen the inside of a church other than on those days except for a funeral or wedding.

I'm just all about the quite life - I just don't care enough about making a stand on the issue to listen to repeated bouts of my missus moaning at me over it! It's far easier to just sit there for an hour, take a few photos and then go about my business.

Please see my last post.

mariaalice wrote: »

It could be anything people liked why not, candles bells songs anything people wanted.

It could of course but you’d have to organize that yourself.
All these things are laid on in the church.
Just show up and it’s all there.

sbsquarepants wrote: »

And that in a nutshell is why it's not done outside school time. A lot of people just wouldn't bother - it's purely a numbers game - they know they're going to loose a lot of them along the way so they've got to widen the base as much as possible at the start.

Exactly. If it wasn’t for the pressure of exclusion on the children communion and confirmation would be reduced to the ~3 kids whose parents actually care enough to put the effort in.