The increase in incidence of small penis' will cause a downturn in childbirth

donegaLroad · 31-10-2017 10:52PM

Two large bags of junk arrived into this house tonight after trick or treating, and I'm going to put them out of sight now that the kids are asleep. Otherwise the stuff would be eaten before the week is over.

Diabetes, obesity, and everything that goes with it is on a major increase, Halloween used to be about apples and nuts when I was a kid.

Hammer89 · 01-11-2017 09:57PM

Martina1991 wrote: »

If obese men do not attract women to reproduce with then so be it. They are not passing on those lifestyle and genetic risks to their children.

This is in the territory of saying, 'obese people shouldn't have children'.

Martina1991 · 01-11-2017 10:40PM

I never said they shouldn't.
I'm saying obese people may find it harder to attract a partner and may impact their ability to have children.

One eyed Jack · 01-11-2017 11:04PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

This is in the territory of saying, 'obese people shouldn't have children'.

If you take it in the context of the rest of the post though -

Martina1991 wrote: »

I don't mean to sound cold or callous about this but: Survival of the fittest.

Those that are obese are at an increased risk of diabetes and heart disease among other things. We know that.

If obese men do not attract women to reproduce with then so be it. They are not passing on those lifestyle and genetic risks to their children.

Obese men (and women) should therefore make the effort to live healthier lives for themselves and future generations.

It's actually a hell of a lot more sensible and practical advice than encouraging young boys to base their self-worth on the size of their penis!

I thought you surely had to be taking the piss with an opening post like that, and I'm not sure you still aren't just taking the piss.

Donald Trump · 01-11-2017 11:12PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

If I was the Taioseach, or the Minister of Health, I'd round up 20 obese men and ask if they'd be willing to stand naked on a stage in a school hall in front of the parents of children who attend that school. I'm not even joking. These parents need a serious jolt to the system and that is certainly an effective method of achieving it.

Lookit, Br. Murphy. How many times do we have to tell you that those days are gone and you can't get away with that sort of craic any more

Hammer89 · 01-11-2017 11:35PM

One eyed Jack wrote: »

If you take it in the context of the rest of the post though

It's actually a hell of a lot more sensible and practical advice than encouraging young boys to base their self-worth on the size of their penis!

I thought you surely had to be taking the piss with an opening post like that, and I'm not sure you still aren't just taking the piss.

Why would I take the piss? It's an issue close to my heart.

I'm not encouraging young boys to base their self-worth on penis size. In fact, I don't need to because they have and will continue to do that regardless.

One eyed Jack · 02-11-2017 12:01AM

Hammer89 wrote: »

Why would I take the piss? It's an issue close to my heart.

I'm not encouraging young boys to base their self-worth on penis size. In fact, I don't need to because they have and will continue to do that regardless.

Because this is After Hours and you were suggesting that the way to tackle potential obesity in young boys is to make them self-conscious about the size of their penis?

I don't see anything to be gained from encouraging young boys to believe that their self-worth revolves around their penis, let alone how you managed to link that to women thinking a relationship should revolve around a mans penis, or indeed that having children still revolves around a mans penis.

Your opening post was just so bizarre that I don't even worry about it contributing to the rising numbers of young boys and men with eating disorders trying to conform to the pressures placed upon them by the imagery they're presented with in popular culture. I just couldn't take it seriously, and I wouldn't expect any parent to take it seriously either.

the2kwans · 02-11-2017 12:13AM

You are only addressing mens obesity and its effect on reproduction. What about the obese and overweight women? This surely must have a negative effect on reproduction. The problem is across 2 sectors, not just the one.

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 12:15AM

the2kwans wrote: »

You are only addressing mens obesity and its effect on reproduction. What about the obese and overweight women? This surely must have a negative effect on reproduction. The problem is across 2 sectors, not just the one.

You're right, but I've never been an obese woman so I'm far less reluctant to talk about things from their perspective.

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Because this is After Hours and you were suggesting that the way to tackle potential obesity in young boys is to make them self-conscious about the size of their penis?

I don't see anything to be gained from encouraging young boys to believe that their self-worth revolves around their penis, let alone how you managed to link that to women thinking a relationship should revolve around a mans penis, or indeed that having children still revolves around a mans penis.

Your opening post was just so bizarre that I don't even worry about it contributing to the rising numbers of young boys and men with eating disorders trying to conform to the pressures placed upon them by the imagery they're presented with in popular culture. I just couldn't take it seriously, and I wouldn't expect any parent to take it seriously either.

Is this your tactic or something? Just make up a bunch of sh*t? Either that or you horrendously missed the point. I have no idea what you're on about.

One of the things I'm saying if mothers and fathers in this country knew the real repercussions of mass weight gain, they, as the gatekeepers of their children's eating habits, would be far more mindful over what their kids are eating.

Having the appearance of a small penis, brought on by obesity and storing fat in the pubic region, can and does have a detrimental social and psychological affect on young boys. But I'm suddenly suggesting that young obese males should be penis shamed, just for bringing up the issue? Okay pal.

highdef · 02-11-2017 12:16AM

A fat man is generally going to be less attractive to a woman. So in theory, a fat man is likely to conceive a child than a healthy weight man... As someone said already, survival of the fittest. It's best not to pass on these bad traits.

One eyed Jack · 02-11-2017 12:31AM

Hammer89 wrote: »

Is this your tactic or something? Just make up a bunch of sh*t? Either that or you horrendously missed the point. I have no idea what you're on about.

If you're going to go there, how realistic do you think your suggestion that we ask 20 obese men to stand up naked on a stage in front of parents?

One of the things I'm saying if mothers and fathers in this country knew the real repercussions of mass weight gain, they, as the gatekeepers of their children's eating habits, would be far more mindful over what their kids are eating.

Why do you assume they aren't aware of it? I'd be more concerned about my child's physical and mental health than the size of his penis, and that's why I laughed off the idea of ever having that conversation with him. It just wouldn't happen.

Having the appearance of a small penis, brought on by obesity and storing fat in the pubic region, can and does have a detrimental social and psychological affect on young boys. But I'm suddenly suggesting that young obese males should be penis shamed, just for bringing up the issue? Okay pal.

Well you can call it what you like, but according to you men are already self-conscious about the size of their penis. I can't say I ever was tbh. I know what you mean and all, but can't they then if they feel the same way you did, lose the weight, the same way you did?

Avatar MIA · 02-11-2017 12:42AM

So, can we take it as given that this particular issue will have zero effect on future population?

It quite possibly will reduce those predisposed to obesity from furthering the gene pool. Therefore, a good thing.

Haz I got it right?

traveller0101 · 02-11-2017 12:48AM

Martina1991 wrote: »

I don't mean to sound cold or callous about this but: Survival of the fittest.

Those that are obese are at an increased risk of diabetes and heart disease among other things. We know that.

If obese men do not attract women to reproduce with then so be it. They are not passing on those lifestyle and genetic risks to their children.

Obese men (and women) should therefore make the effort to live healthier lives for themselves and future generations.

Who passed that lifestyle and genetic risks on to them?

LadyMacBeth_ · 02-11-2017 12:51AM

Jaysus, you'd swear us chubsters were lepers, never stopped me getting laid.

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 12:52AM

One eyed Jack wrote: »

If you're going to go there, how realistic do you think your suggestion that we ask 20 obese men to stand up naked on a stage in front of parents?

Don't confuse realism for effectiveness to be fair. I never said it was realistic but I do believe it would be a hell of a lot more effective. In fact I'm certain it would. I think we need to switch up our tactics personally because parents, for whatever reason, don't heed the health warnings. They clearly don't care about what might happen, so they need to be shown, not told, what will happen. Realistic? Of course not, but parents would leave that school hall with a much bigger moral dilemma than had some doctor told them about diabetes and heart disease for an hour and a half. I'm certain.

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Why do you assume they aren't aware of it? I'd be more concerned about my child's physical and mental health than the size of his penis, and that's why I laughed off the idea of ever having that conversation with him. It just wouldn't happen.

If he's obese then the size of his penis and mental health could be completely interlinked!

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Well you can call it what you like, but according to you men are already self-conscious about the size of their penis. I can't say I ever was tbh. I know what you mean and all, but can't they then if they feel the same way you did, lose the weight, the same way you did?

I didn't say men are self conscious about their penis - I said obese men and obese lads are, in all probability, because you don't gain massive amounts of weight without a lot of it going in the pubic region, concealing a large amount of the penis - if not the entire thing. They can lose weight and rediscover it, but they might not know that and who's to blame them? A huge motivational factor is being denied them because nobody speaks about this subject. It's really quite taboo.

Martina1991 · 02-11-2017 12:56AM

traveller0101 wrote:

Who passed that lifestyle and genetic risks on to them?

Well lifestyle choices aren't genetic.

I'd say the majority of people that are overweight are due to their diet than genetics.

Avatar MIA · 02-11-2017 12:59AM

Martina1991 wrote: »

Well lifestyle choices aren't genetic.

I'd say the majority of people that are overweight are due to their diet than genetics.

Are you sure there's no connection? What about addictive personalities, metabolisms ?!?

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 01:03AM

LadyMacBeth_ wrote: »

Jaysus, you'd swear us chubsters were lepers, never stopped me getting laid.

Women can get sex easier than men. And the aesthetic quality of a vagina won't diminish a great deal with mass weight gain. The vagina itself will look the same whether you're a size zero or size 25. Women get fatty pubic areas too, but would they be as self-conscious over that as an obese man with a very small penis? I'm not a woman so I don't know.

Hector Bellend · 02-11-2017 01:09AM

exceptionally large penis to this story

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 04:27AM

Hector Bellend wrote: »

exceptionally large penis to this story

Am I the large penis you're referring to? Maybe I'm totally wrong. I'm open-minded enough to consider that. I just think there's a lot of things we could be doing better.

I think you have to question just how committed our government is to tackling this epidemic when we insist on telling parents about the possibilities - like heart disease and diabetes - instead of drilling into them the probabilities and inevitabilities.

But we don't, and that's a problem. We have those idiots at SafeFood pulling the same stupid ideas out of their arse during the focus groups for the next ad, relying on the same tactic as before but in a re-modelled way.

"What if, we show a young girl reaching for a packet of crisps, and when the camera pans back on her she's five years older and five stone heavier?"
"That's outstanding, Rory. Top notch. It would illustrate to parents just how quickly obesity can occur. Can anyone better Rory's idea?"
"No but I also think we could mention diabetes again."
"Good idea, Sharon. We've only mentioned it six times in the first 35 seconds."
"Yes great idea Sharon, but instead of mentioning it, why don't we have it written across the screen, in big white writing for emphasis."
"We don't deserve you, Rory. We really don't. Bravo sir."
"Thanks Alan. Parents won't know what hit them this time. I can sense it."
"You're right. Alright team I think that's it for......"
"Hold on I think..........yeah I've just had another one."
"Alright Rory go on."
"Picture the scene: a young boy wants to put a bumper packet of crisps in the shopping trolley. The dad looks up to the ceiling as if to say, 'Ah go on then ye little scamp'. But when the camera pans back on him, he's five years older and five stone heavier."
"That's literally the same idea Rory......but I love it. Right, that's lunch gang. Lunch is on Rory because something tells me he's getting a pay rise. Someone get on the phone to that Northern Irish voiceover guy. I think we're ready to film it."
"Okay. I'll write up a script.
"No need there, Sharon. We'll just use the same one as last year."

According to Einstein, insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results. Sort it out Ireland. Sort it the f*ck out.

JupiterKid · 02-11-2017 04:37AM

If anything, from my escapades with younger men are anything to go by, willy size seems to be increasing, not decreasing.

But yes, being morbidly obese will make one's manhood look like an acorn. As for "hiding within a forest of bushy pubes", don't most guys trim these days? It's not the 1970s anymore and I hear the ladies prefer a well trimmed groin.

But I'd surmise that if one is morbidly obese, mickey size would (or at least should) be the last of your worries.

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 05:17AM

JupiterKid wrote: »

But I'd surmise that if one is morbidly obese, mickey size would (or at least should) be the last of your worries.

I think it depends on a man's age and weight.

For obvious reasons, a small mickey is going to be a bigger problem for a lusty, virile 23-stone young man than it is for some 67-year-old bloke of the same weight. When I was obese, I didn't give a sh*t about any of the health issues associated with obesity - I just wanted my cock back.

Pac1Man · 02-11-2017 08:51AM

Free Hammer's cock! I have written a pledge as a sign of solidarity. All original.

Night gathers but where does my cock begin?

I shall shed no tears,
For what used to be mine.
I shall pray for it daily,
To the God of Tits & Wine.

It was a sword in the darkness,
Now it is dwarfed by my balls.
I'll keep praying for it regardless,
Until it grows so tall.

For this night and all the nights to come.

professore · 02-11-2017 01:04PM

It's a feminist plot to turn men into women. Then the world will be perfect, as we all know women can do no wrong and never fight or harass each other. There will be a few "wild" males left in captivity to mate with all the available females.

valoren · 02-11-2017 01:26PM

Stand still and upright looking straight ahead.
Now keeping your shoulders aligned, look down.

Can you see your mickey?

If Yes, you are not overweight.
If No, you just got a reality check.

MrMorooka · 02-11-2017 02:32PM

professore wrote: »

There will be a few "wild" males left in captivity to mate with all the available females.

Where do I sign up to be one of them?

Avatar MIA · 02-11-2017 02:54PM

MrMorooka wrote: »

Where do I sign up to be one of them?

Legs and arms are surplus to your function. :pac:

And you'd still sign up wouldn't you! :P

jamesbere · 02-11-2017 03:35PM

Is this a send in dick pics thread

LadyMacBeth_ · 02-11-2017 03:43PM

jamesbere wrote: »

Is this a send in dick pics thread

Yes, yes it is........for research.

Hammer89 · 02-11-2017 04:14PM

jamesbere wrote: »

Is this a send in dick pics thread

Only the obese people.

I get the jokes though. But with over 4,000 views, you have to assume more than a few obese males have entered this thread and not spoken up, making me look more of a lunatic, which is perfectly fine because it can be a source of great embarrassment and shame, but the silence illustrates just how big of a problem it is.

Or maybe I'm a madman. Who knows.

The increase in incidence of small penis' will cause a downturn in childbirth

Comments