Girls who love boys who love girls..

Porklife · 27-09-2017 04:02PM #1

Hey Folks,

So I recently met a really great guy on a night out and have fallen pretty hard, pretty fast. I'm not putting him on a pedestal but I like everything I know about him so far and it helps that he's drop dead gorgeous. Que.. romantic music.

It got me thinking though if it's different for guys and girls. I know it all depends on the individuals involved, their background story, family and a whole variety of other factors but in general, do men and women fall in love the same way? Do men tend to fall harder or become smitten sooner or do women, and is the elusive emotion of 'love' similar for men and women or different for absolutely everyone?!

At the moment, I feel an enormous sense of happiness and warmth. I find myself smiling like a moron as I walk down the street and it's like there's a happy soundtrack playing in the background of my life. This is how I feel when I start falling for someone. I'm usually a hard ass cynic scowling at children and pushing old people in front of traffic.

How do you guys & girls feel?

frag420 · 27-09-2017 04:04PM

Girls who like boys who like girls??

Thinly veiled I want a threesome thread!?

Porklife · 27-09-2017 04:05PM

frag420 wrote: »

Girls who like boys who like girls??

Thinly veiled I want a threesome thread!?

Damn, I thought I was being deftly subtle!

Hammer89 · 27-09-2017 04:08PM

What a nice post. I don't even know you and I'm happy for you

Amirani · 27-09-2017 04:15PM

Happy for you!

In response to your general question - I think it really much depends. So many people are very quick to group men and women into separate camps, particularly when it comes to relationships, and in my experience it's not really been the case. Plenty of times I've seen guys fall hard for girls who are a little more restrained at first, but plenty of times I've seen the opposite.

If there's one generalisation I'd venture towards making, it would be that women tend to be less likely to make any sort of concrete first move (talking about more than just normal flirting here; but more around proposing a first date etc.), but again, I have seen it happen and increasingly regularly in recent times.

topper75 · 27-09-2017 05:25PM

Love is more about discussing who's turn it is to put out the bin and giving/getting an earful about being 'down in that pub the whole time'.

What you are experiencing OP is merely infatuation.

McMurphy · 27-09-2017 05:29PM

Do men tend to fall harder or become smitten sooner

You spelt "feel" wrongly.

foxy farmer · 27-09-2017 05:32PM

Love?
Love is a misunderstanding between 2 fools.:)

arayess · 27-09-2017 06:19PM

i have never been in love I've been very fond of people and attracted to some of those people but certainly not in the way others talk about it.
I could always walk away and felt like I could.

Although OP is a nice happy post. I hope all goes well

freshpopcorn · 27-09-2017 06:21PM

Don't let Louise O'Neill hear you use the word girl!

hatrickpatrick · 27-09-2017 06:34PM

frag420 wrote: »

Girls who like boys who like girls??

Thinly veiled I want a threesome thread!?

Well to be fair, a girl liking a boy who likes boys is going to get her heart broken one way or another... Actually seems to happen more often than you might think!

Grayson · 27-09-2017 06:38PM

I'm happy for the OP. However since I'm also single, and have been for a while I also hate them.

SEPT 23 1989 · 27-09-2017 06:39PM

two 90's songs in the OP

pipelaser · 27-09-2017 06:40PM

He's almost certainly cheating on you..

Ulysses Gaze · 27-09-2017 06:40PM

Most of us will never fall in love and will marry out of fear of dying alone.

pumpkin4life · 27-09-2017 06:49PM

For a second there, I thought this was going to be an Oasis vs Blur debate thread, but then I find some wan talking about being happy and there are no song links.

:mad::mad::mad:

Screw that. Blur all the way.

Mister Vain · 27-09-2017 07:01PM

When I was young and naive I was always falling in and out of love. Now I'm lucky if a girl smiles at me.

pumpkin4life · 27-09-2017 07:06PM

Serious posting though, I think there's a bit of truth in this clip:

Barry Badrinath · 27-09-2017 07:24PM

Good for you OP.

Love is great and also can be equally sh1t. I hope it stays good for ya!

Best of luck.

Grayson · 27-09-2017 07:28PM

Mister Vain wrote: »

When I was young and naive I was always falling in and out of love. Now I'm lucky if a girl smiles at me.

You are the exact opposite of your name

rafatoni · 27-09-2017 07:30PM

Following the herds down to greece, On holidays.

Hammer89 · 27-09-2017 07:31PM

Grayson wrote: »

You are the exact opposite of your name

Mrs Artery?

Mister Vain · 27-09-2017 07:54PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

Mrs Artery?

Ahh the girl who broke my heart when I was 21.

Porklife · 27-09-2017 07:59PM

My dilemma between Oasis and Blur was never the music..Blur all the way. It was more who i'd rather bang Damon or Liam. The answer is actually NoelðŸ˜

Hammer89 · 27-09-2017 08:08PM

Mister Vain wrote: »

Ahh the girl who broke my heart when I was 21.

Yeah I used to go out with her overweight French sister, Clogg'd.

MissTheDome · 27-09-2017 08:11PM

Porklife wrote: »

How do you guys & girls feel?

Giddy with the Autumnal joy that many layers of clothing brings.

Wibbs · 27-09-2017 08:14PM

I've been in fond a few times, but in love only twice. To me, Fond and love felt similar enough initially, but after a few months the Love version deepened. It was less about the butterflies of the first flush of it, but more about pure acceptance of another. Almost like a baby bird getting imprinted straight outa the egg. The downside for me was that my brains took a holiday. Went full moron.

In good and bad ways. Over time and in retrospect the bad was pretty bad. Worst being my normal natural and pretty honed BS detector and human reading machine was bypassed.

Allied to me seemingly being a bad judge of character while in Love Brain(failure) mode, I'd be fine with being in Fond again, but I'd personally avoid full on Love. Fantastic feeling, the best drug in the world, but like drugs the stronger the buzz, the worse the hangover and the Love trip hangover is about the worst in the world.

Actually I'd reckon Fond is better. Less frenetic, more practical. And if it goes down the tubes the hangover is much less.

Still, I'd not be one of those hardline cynics that boorishly whinge that "love is an illusion" or any of that. I've seen people head over heels and go on to have really good lives together and fair play to them. The cynic in me would say it's the minority, but hope springs eternal that folks will end up in that minority.

That part of me is still a romantic.

blueser · 27-09-2017 08:19PM

Porklife wrote: »

Hey Folks,

So I recently met a really great guy on a night out and have fallen pretty hard, pretty fast. I'm not putting him on a pedestal but I like everything I know about him so far and it helps that he's drop dead gorgeous. Que.. romantic music.

It got me thinking though if it's different for guys and girls. I know it all depends on the individuals involved, their background story, family and a whole variety of other factors but in general, do men and women fall in love the same way? Do men tend to fall harder or become smitten sooner or do women, and is the elusive emotion of 'love' similar for men and women or different for absolutely everyone?!

At the moment, I feel an enormous sense of happiness and warmth. I find myself smiling like a moron as I walk down the street and it's like there's a happy soundtrack playing in the background of my life. This is how I feel when I start falling for someone. I'm usually a hard ass cynic scowling at children and pushing old people in front of traffic.

How do you guys & girls feel?

"Que.. romantic music." Are you Spanish?

Bambi985 · 27-09-2017 09:28PM

Ah the honeymoon days. Personally I kind of hate those early days of infatuation, the heightened emotions and the uncertainty of what's going to happen if anything in the days ahead. Much prefer when you're a year or two in and that comfortable blanket of love has enveloped you, you're not on your best behaviour pretending to be Miss Universe anymore, you've accepted each other for all your faults and have a lovely warm body to come home to and make plans with.

That's kind of my experience of love. It's a lot less romantic and a lot more boring and a lot less Mills and Boon than all the hype about it. It's like a warm comfort blanket.

Anyways I digress. Enjoy it while it lasts OP. I think you're right that there's no real man-woman divide. I've been with as many men who were quick to jump in as the ones who were emotionally unavailable and impossible to read. I'd say one thing a lot of us have in common is that we become a bit more cynical about the whole thing the older and more experienced we get. Once bitten, twice shy I suppose. Heartbreak is one of the most ball-busting, earth-shattering, soul-destroyingly awful things to come through, not many of us willingly sign up for another potential dose of it all that easily in the aftermath of it.

Mister Vain · 27-09-2017 10:18PM

I'd be the opposite myself. I find the first few months new and exciting and then after that I start to feel suffocated and I want to be single again. I have zero tolerance for drama too. There's little drama in the early days.

Bambi985 · 27-09-2017 10:24PM

Mister Vain wrote: »

I'd be the opposite myself. I find the first few months new and exciting and then after that I start to feel suffocated and I want to be single again. I have zero tolerance for drama too. There's little drama in the early days.

Funny enough I find the "drama" of the intense crazy emotions and "OMG I'm walking on air!" and the obsession with each other in those early days far less comfortable than when you've settled into the relationship and sort of know and trust each other that bit more.

Different strokes I guess. I'd be someone that enjoys the partnership and company of a relationship much more than being single long-term, so it's what I'd naturally gravitate towards if I met someone I really liked.

Girls who love boys who love girls..

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