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girlfriend saying she will break up with me if I go on weekend away with the lads

24567…13

Comments

  • #32
    Annasopra
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,236 ✭✭✭✭Annasopra


    Tell her you are going and she needs to trust you and you would trust her with a group of her female friends.

    It was so much easier to blame it on Them. It was bleakly depressing to think that They were Us. If it was Them, then nothing was anyone's fault. If it was us, what did that make Me? After all, I'm one of Us. I must be. I've certainly never thought of myself as one of Them. No one ever thinks of themselves as one of Them. We're always one of Us. It's Them that do the bad things.

    Terry Pratchet



  • #33
    Graces7
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 32,634 ✭✭✭✭Graces7


    Sounds like SHE wants rid of YOU and has found a way to do it ;) Knows you well enough to be sure that you will take the bait. Clever lass.


  • #34
    Pkiernan
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,236 ✭✭✭Pkiernan


    It's a win win.
    You get to go away for the weekend, and you'll be single.

    This is the very definition of a no brainer.


  • #35
    derfderf
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,588 ✭✭✭derfderf


    Get a hooker at home tonight so she sees how pointless it is to stop you.


  • #36
    Tramore Tilly
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38 ✭Tramore Tilly


    Go. If she breaks up with you, fair enough, her choice, not your fault. If she doesn't break up with you, dont accept any guilt trips she may chuck at you!

    Enjoy the weekend!


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  • #37
    rustynutz
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 824 ✭✭✭rustynutz


    Move on, give in to this and it will get worse, trust me! Enjoy Amsterdam, has to be done at least once in a lifetime


  • #38
    TheAnalyst_
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,370 ✭✭✭TheAnalyst_


    Amsterdam with "the lads" is a pretty crap weekend btw.
    Expect to be ripped off, hated by locals, feel sick for most of it and you won't have a sniff of a girl unless you're paying.


  • #39
    .G.
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,427 ✭✭✭.G.


    gw80 wrote:
    Go, if you dont you,ll be setting a presidence and probably end up resenting her witch will probably end the relationship any way,

    Call her bluff, she will get over it, if not you have probably dodged a bullet

    Exactly this. You'll be making a rod for your own back if you relent on this one OP. She clearly has trust and security issues but that's for her to sort out. She has to trust you and you have to prove that her trust is not misguided. Without trust you have very little worth holding onto.


  • #40
    Cee-Jay-Cee
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,234 ✭✭✭✭Cee-Jay-Cee


    Tell her seeing as she has no trust in you after 9 months then it doesn't bode well for the future so maybe this is for the best. You can tell her you don't want her to finish with you but your going and she has to learn that she is not going to control your life just because she has trust issues.


  • #41
    Samuel T. Cogley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,679 ✭✭✭✭Samuel T. Cogley


    Make sure to drop the pet rabbit around to someone for safe keeping.


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  • #42
    Penny Tration
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,687 ✭✭✭✭Penny Tration


    I agree with those saying to go and she can deal with it or dump you.

    But I'd add that you should dump her before you go, too. Don't let her have the control like that. She's shown you she doesn't trust you, so why would you want to stay with her? End it, then go have fun with your mates.


  • #43
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Go. She sounds like a dose


  • #44
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 17,847 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    huggy15 wrote: »
    well a group of friends have decided to go away to Amsterdam for a lads weekend at the end of April. I've been with my girlfriend 9 months now and everything is great although I do sense she has a few security issues. well anyway there is about 10 of us going including me, most of them are single except 1 or 2. I'd only be goin over for a bit of craic and a few pints but as soon as she got wind of it she went off her head. now she is saying if i go that we are finished! is it just me or is this a bit much? I really don't know what to do now I do like the girl but I think she is being a bit controlling...

    Your answer is there. You "like" her, not love her. Time to move on.


  • #45
    Alf Stewart.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,789 ✭✭✭Alf Stewart.


    Send her a selfie of your smiling head, sandwiched between a Venezuelan hookers breasticles as a way of telling her you're missing her.

    Then go to the dam and smoke doobies.


  • #46
    marklazarcovic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,224 ✭✭✭marklazarcovic


    Change your number before you go too coz she will plague you when your there,still together or not,guilt tripping.

    Your too young for that crap,your not married


  • #47
    BBDBB
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    It's a shame she chose to give you such an ultimatum rather than talking with you openly about her fears


  • #48
    The_Kew_Tour
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 36,031 ✭✭✭✭The_Kew_Tour


    Dump Her.

    What would she be like if ye were married?

    Plenty of fish in the sea.

    EVENFLOW



  • #49
    blaze1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,559 ✭✭✭blaze1


    Yeah, wouldn't wait to see how that one plays out pal... Cut her loose now


  • #50
    nice_guy80
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,722 ✭✭✭nice_guy80


    bring her back a present, like a dildo

    then dump her.


  • #51
    gw80
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,102 ✭✭✭gw80


    nice_guy80 wrote: »
    bring her back a present, like a dildo

    then dump her.

    A used one


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  • #52
    Samuel T. Cogley
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,679 ✭✭✭✭Samuel T. Cogley


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Go. She sounds like a dose

    In fairness it might be what she's looking to avoid :pac:


  • #53
    Sephiroth_dude
    Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Paid Member Posts: 81,524 Mod ✭✭✭✭Sephiroth_dude


    Go, don't let this control freak blackmail you and try and control you like this, it will get worse down the line.

    "The robin in the garden,

    That was me,

    I'm still here, Loving you..

    Until we meet again. "



  • #54
    Firewalkwithme
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,054 ✭✭✭Firewalkwithme


    Opinions seem to be unanimous on this one OP, I think you have your answer by now.


  • #55
    mada82
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 577 ✭✭✭mada82


    It's a straight forward decision really. You're not going.


  • #56
    da gamer
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 940 ✭✭✭da gamer


    She is dead right. Why would you want to go away with 10 smelly lads when you could be at home with your beautiful girlfriend? Do you not love her?


  • #57
    arayess
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,707 ✭✭✭arayess


    TheAnalyst_ wrote: »
    Amsterdam with "the lads" is a pretty crap weekend btw.
    Expect to be ripped off, hated by locals, feel sick for most of it and you won't have a sniff of a girl unless you're paying.

    you sound like a barrel of fun :rolleyes:


  • #58
    Avatar MIA
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,748 ✭✭✭Avatar MIA


    da gamer wrote: »
    She is dead right. Why would you want to go away with 10 smelly lads when you could be at home with your beautiful girlfriend? Do you not love her?

    Yeah, like, is she not enough for you! She has given you a great 9 months, you sound like a user OP!


  • #59
    Fleawuss
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,681 ✭✭✭Fleawuss


    You're a lucky man: she has shown her paranoid controlling emotionally blackmailing side. Enjoy Amsterdam.


  • #60
    Widdershins
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,633 ✭✭✭✭Widdershins


    CINCLANTFLT wrote: »
    You're in AH so expect some odd answers... all jokes aside, there has to be trust in situations like this... my OH went on a Uni trip to Holland when we were going out a similar length of time... I just had to trust her like she trusts me when I go away on trips...

    Also she might think everyone in Amsterdam is a drug addled prostitution user... I went there a few years for a lads trip... I just got blind drunk and left the other elements of such a trip to others!

    Interesting. There are connotations of such elements to such a trip. I guess she might be worried he's off for hookers and stuff.

    Maybe if OP isn't interested in that, he should let her know. Or if you are then can you reasonably expect her to be ok with it.

    Personally I'd find the idea manky so I can see why she'd be a bit...
    But it should be talked through between the two of you OP instead of on After Hours where the default reply is ''dump that psycho''


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  • #61
    Widdershins
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,633 ✭✭✭✭Widdershins


    Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »
    In fairness it might be what she's looking to avoid :pac:

    exactly...ugh


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