Bullshít jobs

30-12-2016 01:26AM #1

So many to choose from. The people who direct traffic in UCD have always been at the top for me - most of us are capable of seeing if there's a parking space without the existence of such people to "guide" us. The lads waving traffic at roadworks in 2016 when automated signs could do it are in the same category.

Tonight in Dundrum I think people engaged in "branding" have to beat that. Roly's is now Ro ly. New image, right there in that space. Such creativity. Branding/advertising/marketing - the epitome of bullshít jobs.

The entire spin doctor/Terry Prone/Svengali/public relations "managing image" types. An entire industry of pointless self-satisfied, back-stabbing sleezebags who think they are really smart because their "friends in the media" obliged by publicising their latest bit of spin/truth distortion/lie/"news". Oooh the "influence". Irish society would have substantially less bullshít if we had a special Section 31 just for starving them of the oxygen of publicity.

Journalists, every single one of them in Ireland. There are perhaps 120 public interest investigative journalists in the world, all of whom are worthy of respect. In Ireland, such journalism doesn't exist outside about 3 RTÉ Investigates programmes per year so all we have as "journalists" in our "free press" are pushers of the spin of various vested interests (usually of the government, as they can give supply endless free stories to "accommodating" journalists). Bullshít, lazy-arsed pseudo profession which at the end of the day gives society nothing.

What's your least favourite bullshít job?

D Trent · 30-12-2016 01:29AM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

So many to choose from. The people who direct traffic in UCD have always been at the top for me - most of us are capable of seeing if there's a parking space without the existence of such people to "guide" us. The lads waving traffic at roadworks in 2016 when automated signs could do it are in the same category.

Tonight in Dundrum I think people engaged in "branding" have to beat that. Roly's is now Ro ly. New image, right there in that space. Such creativity. Branding/advertising/marketing - the epitome of bullshít jobs.

The entire spin doctor/Terry Prone/Svengali/public relations "managing image" types. An entire industry of pointless self-satisfied, back-stabbing sleezebags who think they are really smart because their "friends in the media" obliged by publicising their latest bit of spin/truth distortion/lie/"news". Oooh the "influence". Irish society would have substantially less bullshít if we had a special Section 31 just for starving them of the oxygen of publicity.

Journalists, every single one of them in Ireland. There are perhaps 120 public interest investigative journalists in the world, all of whom are worthy of respect. In Ireland, such journalism doesn't exist so all we have as "journalists" in our "free press" are pushers of the spin of various vested interests (usually of the government, as they can give supply endless free stories to "accommodating" journalists). Bullshít, lazy-arsed pseudo profession which at the end of the day gives society nothing.

What's your least favourite bullshít job?

Before any of what you say can be considered, you must give us your job title.

punisher5112 · 30-12-2016 01:29AM

Auto lights are so last year.

They actually cause more delays why you think they have people on point during the day.

Parking attendant is another thing that actually moves things along and eases congestion.

Should really be thinking what a tuff job and a thankless one at that.

30-12-2016 01:30AM

D Trent wrote: »

Before any of what you say can be considered, you must give us your job title.

Nah, I mustn't.

D Trent · 30-12-2016 01:31AM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Nah, I mustn't.

I bet you're a male Lollypop lady.

badabing106 · 30-12-2016 01:32AM

Health and safety officer

Avatar MIA · 30-12-2016 01:33AM

Deleted User wrote: »

Nah, I mustn't.

Says the student.

20Cent · 30-12-2016 01:37AM

Testing ejector seats in a helicopter factory. Won't fall for that one again.

Avatar MIA · 30-12-2016 01:40AM

Collecting the mess left behind by the cattle every evening so it can be used for fertiliser

Graigmanliam · 30-12-2016 01:43AM

I have to say being a binman doesn't seem like a good time at all, god bless them for doing it.

Pinch Flat · 30-12-2016 01:44AM

You work in morketing Op?

Dempsey · 30-12-2016 01:50AM

20Cent wrote: »

Testing ejector seats in a helicopter factory. Won't fall for that one again.

You can get ejector seats in some helicopters

Killergreene · 30-12-2016 01:57AM

Hospital Porter. Pushing people around on trolleys all day. Must get fair boring and depressing

That and stacking shelves in spar

punisher5112 · 30-12-2016 02:00AM

Killergreene wrote: »

Hospital Porter. Pushing people around on trolleys all day. Must get fair boring and depressing

That and stacking shelves in spar

Under the tree at spa

spoonerhead · 30-12-2016 02:02AM

Working on a 0 hour contract in Tesco

30-12-2016 02:03AM

Male bovine excrement collector.

bodice ripper · 30-12-2016 02:05AM

The wet loop at Hewlett Packard. Let's hire 5 college graduates to hit a single reset buttton. I'm afraid we'll have to move to Singapore to get these costs down...

Stonedpilot · 30-12-2016 02:08AM

Graigmanliam wrote: »

I have to say being a binman doesn't seem like a good time at all, god bless them for doing it.

Making the country clean, little supervision and craic with people with a good hourly rate. Never met a depressed binman.

Teacher to me is a bull**** job. Most simply dont care arent mature, whinge all the time and resent students. Outside of reading and writing very little wisdom taught in schools.

Senna · 30-12-2016 02:10AM

My place has a whole team for "social media monitoring"

30-12-2016 02:10AM

badabing106 wrote: »

Health and safety officer

Graigmanliam wrote: »

I have to say being a binman doesn't seem like a good time at all, god bless them for doing it.

I wouldn't call those bullshít jobs. Hard/boring/dirty etc, but necessary. Therefore not a bullshít/pointless job that society could function without.

maudgonner · 30-12-2016 02:10AM

Killergreene wrote: »

Hospital Porter. Pushing people around on trolleys all day. Must get fair boring and depressing

I have to say, when my Mam was in hospital last year the porters were fantastic. Great craic, very helpful and made her feel at ease. And they seemed to be enjoying their jobs, or else they're good at hiding it.

prinzeugen · 30-12-2016 02:15AM

Dempsey wrote: »

You can get ejector seats in some helicopters

They fire down.. Ground nails.. But if you are any good you will live. Chinock has a poor survival rate

I get idiots at work with " print at home tickets"..

Now the clue is in the "print" bit.

If you have it on the screen of the phone, no amount of shouting "I work for Google" or "do you know who I am" is going to get you in.

Printers.. Use them. That's why when we get the likes of the OP going all "tech", we Have people to help idiots that can't boil an egg..

Your Face · 30-12-2016 02:18AM

I'd rather someone working a bull**** job and paying taxes than being a dole scammer layabout.

Dempsey · 30-12-2016 02:28AM

prinzeugen wrote: »

They fire down.. Ground nails.. But if you are any good you will live. Chinock has a poor survival rate

The Kamov Ka-50 ejects upwards. Think there is a few sideways ejection systems in use aswell.

Any ejector system that fires downwards can only be used in certain conditions, id take my chances with autorotation over a system like that.

Stonedpilot · 30-12-2016 02:30AM

Your Face wrote: »

I'd rather someone working a bull**** job and paying taxes than being a dole scammer layabout.

How is collecting dole a scam exactly now?.

punisher5112 · 30-12-2016 02:31AM

Stonedpilot wrote: »

How is collecting dole a scam exactly now?.

When one is working under the tree at spa

30-12-2016 02:33AM

I thought that some helicopters jettisoned the rotors first, then deployed the ejector seats.

Your Face · 30-12-2016 02:34AM

Stonedpilot wrote: »

How is collecting dole a scam exactly now?.

Reading the post might help in understanding it correctly.
Maybe slow down and concentrate on each word.
Dictionary.com will help with big person words.
You're welcome.

Turtyturd · 30-12-2016 02:36AM

Dublin Bus driver. The driving part is fairly handy and hardly challenging, but having to be a complete c*nt towards the public for the duration of your shift must take a toll. I'd say it's even hard to dial back once your shift is over.

oneilla · 30-12-2016 02:37AM

maudgonner wrote: »

I have to say, when my Mam was in hospital last year the porters were fantastic. Great craic, very helpful and made her feel at ease. And they seemed to be enjoying their jobs, or else they're good at hiding it.

Yep, I'll not have a bad thing said about hospital porters, very helpful and often full of chat which can help many a patient break up the monotony of a hospital ward. Especially if it's a long stay.

Stonedpilot · 30-12-2016 02:46AM

Your Face wrote: »

Reading the post might help in understanding it correctly.
Maybe slow down and concentrate on each word.
Dictionary.com will help with big person words.
You're welcome.

You used the word scammer! .

Big person words? Oh it burns call the fire brigade.

Talk about avoiding the question with petty nonsense. Claiming dole doesnt make someone a scammer.

Bullshít jobs

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