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How come Tinder is so difficult?

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Comments

  • #602
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    Surreptitious wrote: »
    It's actually pretty funny. I met a man randomly about a week ago and he was chatting away to me just ended up matching with him on Tinder. I don't know if he remembers me or not though. Or if he recognises me. Ireland really is a small place.

    You going to hook up on first date?


  • #603
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Got a tinder date organised for this weekend!
    Seems to be full of financial/It/Drs/accountants though. Lots of matches today, but just one date.

    So whats a good first message that i can use to hook up with??


  • #604
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    So whats a good first message that i can use to hook up with??



    I don't know what a good first message would be to hook up with. Generally asking how their day was and commenting on something in her profile may get you a response?


  • #605
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    I don't know what a good first message would be to hook up with. Generally asking how their day was and commenting on something in her profile may get you a response?

    One of the most difficult aspects for me it to get matches to respond to messages. I have tried messages like that, but there are the same as all the other messages they get.


  • #606
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    One of the most difficult aspects for me it to get matches to respond to messages. I have tried messages like that, but there are the same as all the other messages they get.

    Then you need better photos. I only swipe right on guys that I think are hot. If they send a half decent message and I still think they're hot, I reply back. If they tell me how they got so drunk last night that they now have a black eye, or ask me to send the more pics straight away, I unmatch them immediately.


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  • #607
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Then you need better photos. I only swipe right on guys that I think are hot. If they send a half decent message and I still think they're hot, I reply back. If they tell me how they got so drunk last night that they now have a black eye, or ask me to send the more pics straight away, I unmatch them immediately.

    So what's the half decent message? Are you hot? I have already matched with them so they must have in some way liked my photos


  • #608
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Here's an example.

    "They there!
    *hey!! Well that wasn't a great start! *insert crying laughing emoji*
    How's your Sunday so far?"

    I responded to that because a) he's hot and b) he seems light hearted and fun


  • #609
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Here's an example.

    "They there!
    *hey!! Well that wasn't a great start! *insert crying laughing emoji*
    How's your Sunday so far?"

    I responded to that because a) he's hot and b) he seems light hearted and fun

    I doubt that works to be honest, will give it trial but i'm not optimistic. Does it have to be Sunday? So what has been the best first message you received verbatim?

    To clarify you think everyone you matched with is hot, cause why else would you right swipe right?


  • #610
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    For me? I don't like anything boring, serious or weird.
    Come across like a normal person thats easy to talk to, easy going, bit of craic.
    I got a message from some guy a few days ago that was like "omg dear, I'd like to make you laugh and give you orgasms". Straight away unmatched, I'm not a piece of meat. I don't like insincere fawning either. "You're beautiful, why do you need tinder?" Everyone's different, they're just my personal likes/dislikes


  • #611
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    For me? I don't like anything boring, serious or weird.
    Come across like a normal person thats easy to talk to, easy going, bit of craic.
    I got a message from some guy a few days ago that was like "omg dear, I'd like to make you laugh and give you orgasms". Straight away unmatched, I'm not a piece of meat. I don't like insincere fawning either. "You're beautiful, why do you need tinder?" Everyone's different, they're just my personal likes/dislikes

    But asking how was your day is boring and will be sent countless times as a first message. So tell me what was the best first message you received?


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  • #612
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    But asking how was your day is boring and will be sent countless times as a first message. So tell me what was the best first message you received?
    Off the top of my head I can't give you an honest answer. I can't remember the best. I've accidently swipes right on some people, there's a glitch that I've been matched with people I didn't swipe on and sometimes I've swiped right, got a better look and thought wtf was I thinking?

    "Hey"
    "Wua?"
    "You're unreal"
    Etc are lame and boring, sending a friendly interested message isn't


  • #613
    gitzy16v
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,093 ✭✭✭gitzy16v


    Ive tried plenty of witty openers(with no replies) but this worked the best...
    Hey,wanna meet up for sex the weekend?immediately followed by...coffee,coffee, i meant coffee, goddamn autocorrect.
    Got loads of crying laughing emoji replies,then in with the "hows your day been,how are you keeping etc.
    At least I knew the ones who replied had a similar sense of humour to me,or at least wasnt offended by mine.


  • #614
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    Off the top of my head I can't give you an honest answer. I can't remember the best. I've accidently swipes right on some people, there's a glitch that I've been matched with people I didn't swipe on and sometimes I've swiped right, got a better look and thought wtf was I thinking?

    "Hey"
    "Wua?"
    "You're unreal"
    Etc are lame and boring, sending a friendly interested message isn't

    I never send those messages, you're telling me what doesn't work but not what does. Help me out here. The guy you meet with what was his first message. I can then edit it for my different matches to make reference to their profile and will be hooking up every week


  • #615
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    The guy I met was an absolute lash, is a dr in a busy hospital in Dublin so he send a fairly standard message to start off with but straight away he was interesting and we had lots to talk about. We got on pretty well, conversation flowed, he wasn't an idiot, respectful, and easy on the eye. It's not like he blew me out of the water with the very first message, it was standard.


  • #616
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    You going to hook up on first date?

    Eh, no.


  • #617
    Esse85
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭Esse85


    It matters little what you actually say on a first message.
    If the other person fancies you then you can almost say what you like within reason and get a reply. 80/20 rule
    On the flipside, if the other person doesn't fancy you, it doesn't really matter what you message them, vast majority of time they will not reply. 80/20 rule


  • #618
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    Esse85 wrote: »
    It matters little what you actually say on a first message.
    If the other person fancies you then you can almost say what you like within reason and get a reply. 80/20 rule
    On the flipside, if the other person doesn't fancy you, it doesn't really matter what you message them, vast majority of time they will not reply. 80/20 rule
    In order to send the first messages the other person has already judged you on your looks and right swiped you


  • #619
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    Surreptitious wrote: »
    Eh, no.

    why not? Tinder is a hook up app


  • #620
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    why not? Tinder is a hook up app

    It is for the most part. Anyway I have no spoken to him on it so couldn't tell you. I agree with the other poster that if they really fancy you, it doesn't much matter what you say to them. They usually go for did you have a good weekend even if it's wednesday.


  • #621
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    why not? Tinder is a hook up app
    There's your mistake.

    I


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  • #622
    Esse85
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,438 ✭✭✭Esse85


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    In order to send the first messages the other person has already judged you on your looks and right swiped you

    A lot of people swipe right just for the sake of it too, a mass swiping approach.

    As I said, if you like the look of the other person, you'll find a reason to reply to a "hey"


  • #623
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    There's your mistake.

    I

    But that's what Tinder is, A hook up app.


  • #624
    Alpha_zero
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 907 ✭✭✭Alpha_zero


    Esse85 wrote: »
    A lot of people swipe right just for the sake of it too, a mass swiping approach.

    As I said, if you like the look of the other person, you'll find a reason to reply to a "hey"
    Well yes that happens too.


  • #625
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    But that's what Tinder is, A hook up app.


    I could go out any night of the week and pick up a one night stand. As could most women, I'd imagine. Hell, I could probably find a hookup in my phonebook or Facebook friends. I'm certainly not on tinder to meet some guy for a hook up, don't need tinder for that. And thankfully the guys I'm talking to seem to be on the same page as me. Plenty of chats, plenty of dates. No insinuating I should be grateful he'd give me the ride


  • #626
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    Well yes that happens too.

    So is the problem actually getting to meet people? It has a lot to do with location. If you're not in Dublin there are way less opportunities.


  • #627
    professore
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,849 ✭✭✭professore


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    The guy I met was an absolute lash, is a dr in a busy hospital in Dublin so he send a fairly standard message to start off with but straight away he was interesting and we had lots to talk about. We got on pretty well, conversation flowed, he wasn't an idiot, respectful, and easy on the eye. It's not like he blew me out of the water with the very first message, it was standard.

    No need to be anything special guys. Just be a fun, intelligent good looking doctor.


  • #628
    professore
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,849 ✭✭✭professore


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    I never send those messages, you're telling me what doesn't work but not what does. Help me out here. The guy you meet with what was his first message. I can then edit it for my different matches to make reference to their profile and will be hooking up every week

    She just told you. Just be hot.


  • #629
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    professore wrote: »
    No need to be anything special guys. Just be a fun, intelligent good looking doctor.
    Hey I'd be happy if he was in a pair of snickers pants, just be respectful and good looking


  • #630
    johnnyskeleton
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Politics Moderators Posts: 14,568 Mod ✭✭✭✭johnnyskeleton


    Alpha_zero wrote: »
    I never send those messages, you're telling me what doesn't work but not what does. Help me out here. The guy you meet with what was his first message. I can then edit it for my different matches to make reference to their profile and will be hooking up every week

    Im guessing youre trying to make a point about there being no mathematical formula to the messages, or that its not about what is said but rather who is saying it.

    In any event, theres a circularity about these things. Women want originality, not pick up artist lines. So men then go out and make up originality. But since theres only a finite amount of originality, it soon becomes standard pick up artist fare. So by definition originality cant be repeated.


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  • #631
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Just be yourself and the right person will like you.






    *Unless you're an asshole, then you're screwed :P


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