Would you let the public verbally abuse you for just doing your job??

hairyslug · 13-11-2016 05:35PM

I had developed think skin for it when I retail with the ability to laugh it off, I had 1 person throw a phone at me, had to get walked away from the shop before with security because someone threatened me. I had one woman, when declined a phone account ask why because she's not black or anything, that was the only time I retaliated and refuse to serve her afterwards.

My skin now is much thinner and I don't think I'd last a day in retail

13-11-2016 05:41PM

I had a student job in a cinema, and often worked the dreaded Saturday morning kids club showing. Lots of parents would drop their kids off and pick them up after the showing. There was always a few who didn't bother to be there when the movie ended and you'd wind up minding the kids for anything up to an hour. This was after cleaning up after them (there was always puke. Always).

If you complained to the parents about minding the kids, you'd take your life in your hands. I was called every name under the sun for asking them to please pick their kids up on time, or accompany them if they were coming to the cinema.

I hated that job more than I hate brussels sprouts.

endofrainbow · 13-11-2016 05:42PM

Most people who deal with the public have at one stage or another been on the receiving end of verbal abuse.

Perhaps you need to grow a pair or accept that a front facing role maybe isn't for you.

NomadicGray · 13-11-2016 05:58PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

I verbally abused a woman who worked in the chipper last month, over the phone mind you. When I ring a chipper for me and someone else, I stipulate, on two occasions, that the chips are to be put in separate bags. It's a minor, I know, but f*ck separating a bunch of chips when it comes. But this one night, they weren't in separate bags and I lost it. 'Dial those c*nts back,' I say to the person whose phone I used. I take the phone and speak quite fast. 'Hi. I just ordered a delivery but the chips weren't in separate bags. Can your man come back?' There's a pause. 'Do you want delivery or collection?' she responds. 'No, no,' I say. 'It's already here but I want you to take it back and give me separate bags. I said it twice during the original call.'

Again, I know it's a minor thing, but being ignored isn't nice. 'Sorry sir but the driver has gone home already,' she says after I tell her my address. 'F*ck sake,' I say. 'Sorry but that's unacceptable'. I turn into a 69-year-old retired man when I'm complaining about something. Plus, these mugs have a long history of ignoring things; like delivering a can of Fanta when you ordered a bottle of Club Orange, or the most annoying thing of all, ordering a plain burger and finding tomato, onions, lettuce, mayonnaise and an Easy Single underneath the meat. 'You people have a history of ignoring my order. Why is this?' Before she can answer I hang up; partially in frustration, but mainly embarrassment over the fact that I suggested there's an in-house conspiracy on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

Grade A

Hammer89 · 13-11-2016 06:04PM

NomadicGray wrote: »

Grade A

Well if they do insist on ignoring customers' request then they will get complaints I'm afraid - especially if that request was mentioned twice.

Timberrrrrrrr · 13-11-2016 06:15PM

Worked a s a doorman for 25 years, I always maintain I cannot be insulted anymore because no matter what someone says to me I have heard it/been called it a hundred times befire.

SusieBlue · 13-11-2016 06:17PM

Regardless of whether it's the fault of the company or just placating an irate customer over something that wasn't our fault, I would humour a bit of general giving out from a customer.

I've often been in a position myself where I'm not happy about a company policy etc and I appreciate their need to air their grievance.

However, after listening to their complaint/issue, sympathising, offering alternative options and apologising on behalf of the company etc., if they continue to push their point (insert 'I know my rights' type bollox) or be rude/personal I have no problem giving back what I'm getting.

My attitude is why should I be respectful to someone whose speaking to me in a disgusting manner? I realise I represent the company & am willing to accept a certain amount of stick but I also have respect for myself, as a person and as an employee, and will not tolerate it.

Respect is a two way street. My go-to response to rudeness is something like 'please sir, the manner in which your speaking to me is very aggressive and intimidating. I'm happy discuss this matter civilly but if your continue pursuing this tone of language with me I will call security & we can deal with your issue via phone/email when you've calmed down. I realise your upset but I will not be spoken to like that.' Normally worked a treat.

The laugh of it is that I'm way more inclined to help and go above and beyond to customers who are polite when airing their concerns, I feel more sorry for them so the guilt pushes me to do more. As soon as someone starts shouting at me I mentally shut down and just want them out of my face. I have no tolerance for it.

SusieBlue · 13-11-2016 06:21PM

endofrainbow wrote: »

Most people who deal with the public have at one stage or another been on the receiving end of verbal abuse.

Perhaps you need to grow a pair or accept that a front facing role maybe isn't for you.

Being in a customer facing role is not a free for all for the general public to let rip as much as they feel like.
A certain amount is to be expected and accepted but suggesting that they just need to deal with it or get a new job is unacceptable.
What's unacceptable is the attitude that you can speak to someone like a piece of crap just because you aren't happy about something.
Respect is a two way street, if more people aired their problems with a polite tone and manners there wouldn't be any problems on this front at all.

Goya · 13-11-2016 06:30PM

The "I know my rights"/"the customer is always right" stuff is hilarious. Both could not be more inaccurate.

The anger when the customer knows they're in the wrong and feels backed into a corner so they lash out (like the parents in the cinema example above) is laughable adult baby behaviour too.

That said, some assistants can be rude as hell too (but it's rare - vile customers are far more commonplace). We were blatantly ignored in a cafe today so we said it (politely) and they sorted out our order immediately.

pgj2015 · 13-11-2016 06:41PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

I verbally abused a woman who worked in the chipper last month, over the phone mind you. When I ring a chipper for me and someone else, I stipulate, on two occasions, that the chips are to be put in separate bags. It's a minor, I know, but f*ck separating a bunch of chips when it comes. But this one night, they weren't in separate bags and I lost it. 'Dial those c*nts back,' I say to the person whose phone I used. I take the phone and speak quite fast. 'Hi. I just ordered a delivery but the chips weren't in separate bags. Can your man come back?' There's a pause. 'Do you want delivery or collection?' she responds. 'No, no,' I say. 'It's already here but I want you to take it back and give me separate bags. I said it twice during the original call.'

Again, I know it's a minor thing, but being ignored isn't nice. 'Sorry sir but the driver has gone home already,' she says after I tell her my address. 'F*ck sake,' I say. 'Sorry but that's unacceptable'. I turn into a 69-year-old retired man when I'm complaining about something. Plus, these mugs have a long history of ignoring things; like delivering a can of Fanta when you ordered a bottle of Club Orange, or the most annoying thing of all, ordering a plain burger and finding tomato, onions, lettuce, mayonnaise and an Easy Single underneath the meat. 'You people have a history of ignoring my order. Why is this?' Before she can answer I hang up; partially in frustration, but mainly embarrassment over the fact that I suggested there's an in-house conspiracy on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

This reminds me of the signs someone is a tosser thread, talk about first world problems.

Lackey · 13-11-2016 06:44PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

Well if they do insist on ignoring customers' request then they will get complaints I'm afraid - especially if that request was mentioned twice.

You had a couple of options here ..to do what u did or ring the next day, ask to speak to a manager, explain what has happened and ask that it doesn't happen again, and probably get some kind of good will gesture.

It makes me wonder sometimes what's going on in a persons life that they overreact by shouting swearing and throwing stuff...but mostly it doesn't touch me cause my family are worth it
And at the end of the day I go home to them and be happy but assholes will probably never be happy

And when it does get to me, well I go to my friends and family then too.
Oh and No those aren't your rights no matter how much you scream, swear and even throw stuff at me.

padd b1975 · 13-11-2016 06:49PM

I pick a spot on their forehead and just stare at it with a hint of a smirk.

They freak themselves out trying to work out if I'm staring at them, there's a mark there or I'm just cross-eyed.

RayM · 13-11-2016 06:52PM

I used to get into trouble for saying "you're welcome" when customers didn't say "thank you".

Goya · 13-11-2016 06:53PM

endofrainbow wrote: »

Most people who deal with the public have at one stage or another been on the receiving end of verbal abuse.

That is correct.

Perhaps you need to grow a pair or accept that a front facing role maybe isn't for you.

I've a better idea - aggrieved customers (often through their own fault or because of something that is standard and not poor customer service) not acting the **** to people who are not to blame.

People here do have a pair - not accepting verbal abuse from customers is not a sign of needing to grow a pair. Surely not being prepared to take that crap is a sign of growing a pair.

Ted111 · 13-11-2016 06:56PM

I get down on the ground and curl up in a ball and start crying.

R.D. aka MR.D · 13-11-2016 07:01PM

I left a job a few months ago because apparently taking abuse was 'part of my role'. I'm in a new place now and any hint of abuse and they are out on their ear.

To be honest, the kind of people who are rude to people on the phone or in a shop must have something seriously wrong with them that they feel so entitled to treat another human being so poorly. That's the way I get through it, imagine what a sad little life they have to have to do that and be okay with themselves.

Didas · 13-11-2016 07:11PM

People who abuse staff like that are beyond cowardly. They know that a waiter, cashier or call centre won't tell them to go **** themselves, so they feel safe letting rip on them. I'd imagine they're the type of people who would cower away from any type of confrontation where they expect the other person to stand up to them.

Penny Tration · 13-11-2016 07:43PM

tonygun wrote: »

People who abuse staff like that are beyond cowardly. They know that a waiter, cashier or call centre won't tell them to go **** themselves, so they feel safe letting rip on them. I'd imagine they're the type of people who would cower away from any type of confrontation where they expect the other person to stand up to them.

Pretty much this.

A great way of sussing out a potential boyfriend/girlfriend is to bring them for coffee or to dinner, and see how they treat the staff.

Conor Bourke · 13-11-2016 07:50PM

I'm a community nurse, thankfully don't get too much aggro at work but now and again things can flare up. Very often it's nothing more than a manifestation of the persons grief and I am the unfortunate target. All I can do is keep calm, ask them politely not to speak to me like that and then get the flip out of there if things don't calm down. Not much else I can do about it.

Hammer89 · 13-11-2016 08:35PM

Lackey wrote: »

And when it does get to me, well I go to my friends and family then too.

In other words, you bore the hole off innocent people who don't care, rather than be an "asshole" and complain directly to the employee you're frustrated with. That's a bit selfish on your part in my view.

Why is this chipper woman being perceived as some sort of saint by the way? She ignored a customer twice. Actually, she's got my order wrong on a number of occasions and perhaps enough was enough.

Lackey · 13-11-2016 08:49PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

In other words, you bore the hole off innocent people who don't care, rather than be an "asshole" and complain directly to the employee you're frustrated with. That's a bit selfish on your part in my view.

Not sure where you got this from my post?

Why is this chipper woman being perceived as some sort of saint by the way? She ignored a customer twice. Actually, she's got my order wrong on a number of occasions and perhaps enough was enough.

Lol calm down
She put two bags of chips in one bag it's not the end of the world ..'enough is enough' ðŸ˜‚
And there's a big difference between complaining like you could have done appropriately to the owner and ringing the place cursing at her and hanging up.

Goya · 13-11-2016 08:51PM

I can understand your annoyance at the chipper, Hammer (I was so annoyed at the staff in a cafe today - bunch of surly gits) when they're repeatedly careless, but I think you could have expressed this more politely, you would still have put the point across. It's not fair to start swearing over the driver being gone home - his work hours are his work hours.

13-11-2016 08:54PM

I'm a polite, courteous, punctual plumber. Someone is rude to me and I'll be just as rude back.

Hammer89 · 13-11-2016 09:07PM

Flimpson wrote: »

I can understand your annoyance at the chipper, Hammer (I was so annoyed at the staff in a cafe today - bunch of surly gits) when they're repeatedly careless, but I think you could have expressed this more politely, you would still have put the point across. It's not fair to start swearing over the driver being gone home - his work hours are his work hours.

I don't blame the driver - I blame her for ignoring a customer. I realise it's a minor issue but I don't think I overreacted. I mean, if it was a first-time offence for the broad then fair enough, we all make mistakes, but it wasn't. Not paying attention was becoming a habit of hers - a bad one, and any employee with a bad habit in the workplace ought to be told. I probably made her better at her job, made her more attentive and sensitive to the needs of weirdos like me who demand separate bags. She should write me a thank you letter.

Goya · 14-11-2016 02:43AM

Or... you made her decide "**** that so and so, won't be making any effort for him in future."

Since they keep screwing up, give another chipper your business.

14-11-2016 02:55AM

In my job, not only do people expect you to take verbal abuse, they also expect that you are there to take physical abuse also.
If you complain then the public in general all agree that your job is to take assaults and abuse.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 14-11-2016 10:36AM

bubblypop wrote: »

In my job, not only do people expect you to take verbal abuse, they also expect that you are there to take physical abuse also.
If you complain then the public in general all agree that your job is to take assaults and abuse.

Some of the public think you should be armed with an electrical cattle prod and a good strong plastic stick that you could use to wrap around the scumbags on the street.

Edups · 14-11-2016 10:59AM

Hammer89 wrote: »

In other words, you bore the hole off innocent people who don't care, rather than be an "asshole" and complain directly to the employee you're frustrated with. That's a bit selfish on your part in my view.

Why is this chipper woman being perceived as some sort of saint by the way? She ignored a customer twice. Actually, she's got my order wrong on a number of occasions and perhaps enough was enough.

Do you mind just stopping? You're making me physically sick

Olishi4 · 14-11-2016 11:00AM

Haven't really worked too much with the public but ye, no one deserves to be shouted at however it is part of the job to try not to let things get that far and show an understanding to the customer and diffuse the situation although some customers, I'm sure are just determined to have an argument.

I wanted to exchange something recently in a shop and the man was really rude. He didn't have to exchange it for me but he could and he decided not to even though I spend a lot of money in that shop. He was really exacerbating the situation. He was talking and laughing about me in a condescending way with another colleague in front of me and he said something along the lines of 'tough luck".

I told them to get me the manager. When the manager arrived, it turned out that he was a bloke that use to go to my school, a year or two above me. I told him what happened, he brought me to another till and he was like "no problem, sure we can exchange it, not sure why he wouldnt change it for you? Hes completely out of order".

Riddle101 · 14-11-2016 11:10AM

The problem with certain jobs is that you may not have a choice because of the job that's in it. The Gardaí get an awful lot of abuse from the public when a lot of the times they're just doing their job. Same with politicians, although i'm sure a lot of people think that what they get is deserved, I wouldn't argue in some cases. Sometimes you just have to turn the other cheek.

Would you let the public verbally abuse you for just doing your job??

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