Would you let the public verbally abuse you for just doing your job??

Masala · 10-11-2016 06:52PM #1

Just wondering for those who have to work with the public (waiters / bus drivers / shop assistants etc...) - do you accept any verbal abuse from a member of the public when you are just doing your job.

eg... bus is late cos traffic is bad- not caused by you. Or.... they maintain that the there is no place to seat in a busy coffee shop etc.

There just seems to be a more tendency of the public letting fly these days and they seem to think that they have a right to speak to an employee as they like even though its not the fault of the employee.

Has happened to me a few times and I have just grovelled and apologized profusely for the same of the company. But now I am in my mid-fifties - I am finding it harder to hold back when some 20++ yr old starts listing off her rights. Or even mentioning going to local paper / radio to complain etc....

Feel that I am going to let rip soon at the next person who abuses me ....

Sufitzy · 10-11-2016 06:54PM

Masala wrote: »

Just wondering for those who have to work with the public (waiters / bus drivers / shop assistants etc...) - do you accept any verbal abuse from a member of the public when you are just doing your job.

eg... bus is late cos traffic is bad- not caused by you. Or.... they maintain that the there is no place to seat in a busy coffee shop etc.

There just seems to be a more tendency of the public letting fly these days and they seem to think that they have a right to speak to an employee as they like even though its not the fault of the employee.

Has happened to me a few times and I have just grovelled and apologized profusely for the same of the company. But now I am in my mid-fifties - I am finding it harder to hold back when some 20++ yr old starts listing off her rights. Or even mentioning going to local paper / radio to complain etc....

Feel that I am going to let rip soon at the next person who abuses me ....

Kill them with kindness, wrecks their head !!

SkinnyBuddha · 10-11-2016 06:56PM

I use to work for a large ISP in their tech call centre.First bit of abuse I'd tell them to learn some manners and then call back in.

So no.

Renegade Mechanic · 10-11-2016 07:06PM

Rip away, people are gone to trash lately...
I walked into a restaurant a ages ago to see a rather heavy set fella giving out stink to a person at the till, about waiting for a meal, but he was properly nasty. Words like "worthless" were being thrown about.

I sat down while this went on and he returned to his table. Next to mine.... Before my brain could call me a gob****e and tell me to shut up, I'd already quietly leaned over and got his attention.

'Jaysus, fair play to you, you didn't half ate him alive!' I said in a supportive tone, no sarcasm.

'Ah lad, it's unreal, if the food wasn't good, I'd be gone.'

'No wonder your such a fat ****'.

He just stared at me, completely shocked

'Stop atin' people, they're quite fattening. Mabye then you'll be able to climb stairs without fainting. I'm unemployed right now and have **** all in the bank, you can't sue me out of anything like you can him.'

All quiet, we were the only two who heard. He just got up, gave me a "**** on his shoe" appraisal (which in fairness, given the 161 Merc he sat into afterwards, I probably was...), and sat down at another table!

The wait was shocking though, I was 25 minutes waiting for a full Irish, the table edges were looking appealing...

reason vs religion · 10-11-2016 07:10PM

To customers, staff represent the company. They are not in a position to establish who was to blame. And if they are expected to address their complaints up the chain, it's not obvious that anyone is to blame below the CEO. So I do think it is part of the job to accept complaints. Naturally, if it's personally offensive or aggressive (and being curt or angry does not equate to aggression!), it's not acceptable. But usually, a sincere apology and explanation will be sufficient to placate the customer. That last is something the majority of workers in the Irish services industry seem unable to give.

Father Hernandez · 10-11-2016 07:29PM

Sufitzy wrote: »

Kill them with kindness, wrecks their head !!

+1. In the bar trade for years and years, kindness (hint of sarcasm) gets them.

Obviously if something is wrong you attend to it, but noone deserves to be treated like s**t when they're working and doing their best. Some things customers just don't see. (Kegs empty, ran out of particular starter/main course/alcoholic brand, etc which is not necessarily there fault)

If you're doing your best and something has happened beyond your control, never raise your voice, as kind as possible smile and nod; customers hate it. (That is if they are being a complete p***k about it)

Life's too short for that nonsense and a good boss will acknowledge the business doesn't need customers like that.

"Customer is always right except when they're wrong"

Conchir · 10-11-2016 07:36PM

Once I know neither myself nor my colleagues have done anything wrong or made a mistake, then absolutely not.

I worked in a summer job where you got a lot of very impatient people and people with a lot of (very wrong) ideas about how we should have been doing things. Explaining things very, very slowly and with an over the top level of kindness usually did the trick and got them to back down. I also knew that my manager, who was always there working too, wouldn't let anyone lay into the staff. It led to a pretty good atmosphere in the company, knowing everyone had each others backs.

FizzleSticks · 10-11-2016 07:38PM

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petrolcan · 10-11-2016 07:38PM

Used to work in a tool shop and a colleague who wasn't that bright received a call from a customer who let rip into him for not being able to immediately answer his query. I took over the call and told the customer that I will be hanging up immediately and should he wish to call back he needs to be more civil.

A few minutes pass and said customer calls back and immediately starts ranting. I informed said customer that if he didn't start talking in a more civil manner that I would be hanging up. I also informed the customer that we had his money and he hadn't yet had his goods.

Easy dealt with after that.

FizzleSticks · 10-11-2016 07:39PM

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petrolcan · 10-11-2016 07:45PM

FizzleSticks wrote: »

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Oh yes and way more fun too.

andekwarhola · 10-11-2016 07:50PM

Really couldn't handle it myself and would end up lashing out. I'd hate to be in a public facing role.

That said, if I had no choice but to do it to support your family and whatnot, I guess I'd have to.

FizzleSticks · 10-11-2016 07:58PM

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qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 10-11-2016 08:16PM

No, not at all. The first few times it happened I was so shocked I didn't do anything. Now though, no way. Do they think we need their cash that much? Get the fu k out. Please leave. Not leaving? Do I need to call the gardai? Someone's rude on the phone? "Karen, I am being civil to you. Please do not speak to me like that" and any explicitives thereafter the call is terminated.

Summer wind · 10-11-2016 08:27PM

I've had a few different jobs which involved working with the public. I was a supervisor and part time manager of a very busy petrol station for a few years. You would meet all kinds of people and we had lots of regulars that were lovely and we'd always have a laugh. Some others were a different story though. I've been behind the counter on the till during the morning rush and had men pulling up to the petrol pump and filling up their diesel car. Then they come into the shop shout at you from the door about what's happened and ask what are you going to do about it. Then you get women complaining they've filled their car and gotten diesel on their clothes.

The worst thing you can do is lose your own temper even though it can be very hard not to. People can be so rude and disrespectful but it's easier to keep a smile on your face take a deep breath and try and get them sorted as fast as possible.

intheclouds · 10-11-2016 08:37PM

Worked as a waitress and some nasty bint was shockingly rude to me and refused to pay for the food or my tip (was in the US).

Few days later I was behind her in the queue in Walmart and she was tearing strips off some cashier over something nonsensical.

I delighted in announcing, loudly, "OH, YOURE THE RUDE WOMAN WHO REFUSED TO PAY FOR HER MEAL WHERE I WORK A COUPLE OF DAYS AGO, WHY DONT YOU SHUT UP AND STOP BOTHERING PEOPLE YOU NASTY BINT".

The cashier looked absolutely thrilled.

pragmatic1 · 10-11-2016 08:38PM

I used to work at a call centre and get abuse for basically the entire day. I could care less. Trying to get sales was much harder.

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 10-11-2016 09:08PM

pragmatic1 wrote: »

I could care less.

So it bothered you?

Goya · 12-11-2016 09:05PM

I don't do the "kill them with kindness" thing (although I know others find it highly effective) but what I do is: be extremely polite and helpful and informative but with a detached, firm, slightly cold tone - no way would I grovel. If they get personal/use abusive language I'll request them to discontinue doing so or I won't engage with them. Works for me.

Majority of people are fine but some folks are utterly deplorable to service providers and it's bullying. Obviously on the mild end of the scale but it's done to an easy target whom they know cannot defend themselves. **** that. Don't let anyone treat you that way. You can't abuse them back obviously but you don't have to grovel either.

TheIrishGrover · 12-11-2016 10:15PM

I've always said that everyone should work with the public at some stage. A person is fine. But People? Scum

You'll never pull that "The customer is always right" or "I know my rights (Which they don't)" horsesh*t again.
If you say it in a group of people you can instantly spot who has and who hasn't worked with the public:

The people who have nod their heads slowly with a haunted look on their faces.

The people who haven't look confused "Why? People are fine. You'll always get one or two but so do we at our job"

You weren't there maaaaaaannnnnn!!!!! You don't know!!!!!

Robsweezie · 12-11-2016 10:57PM

3 strike policy

#1- ''I'm sorry you feel that way, I'll try to fix this for you''
#2 - ''please remain calm, can i ask you to please stop with the abusive language?, im trying to help''
#3 - ''now listen here you c#nt....'' *roll up sleeves*

Edups · 12-11-2016 11:04PM

No. I generally ask those people to leave as they aren't welcome.
When they asked for a manger he told them the same

It was kind of like this

Hammer89 · 13-11-2016 03:27PM

I verbally abused a woman who worked in the chipper last month, over the phone mind you. When I ring a chipper for me and someone else, I stipulate, on two occasions, that the chips are to be put in separate bags. It's a minor, I know, but f*ck separating a bunch of chips when it comes. But this one night, they weren't in separate bags and I lost it. 'Dial those c*nts back,' I say to the person whose phone I used. I take the phone and speak quite fast. 'Hi. I just ordered a delivery but the chips weren't in separate bags. Can your man come back?' There's a pause. 'Do you want delivery or collection?' she responds. 'No, no,' I say. 'It's already here but I want you to take it back and give me separate bags. I said it twice during the original call.'

Again, I know it's a minor thing, but being ignored isn't nice. 'Sorry sir but the driver has gone home already,' she says after I tell her my address. 'F*ck sake,' I say. 'Sorry but that's unacceptable'. I turn into a 69-year-old retired man when I'm complaining about something. Plus, these mugs have a long history of ignoring things; like delivering a can of Fanta when you ordered a bottle of Club Orange, or the most annoying thing of all, ordering a plain burger and finding tomato, onions, lettuce, mayonnaise and an Easy Single underneath the meat. 'You people have a history of ignoring my order. Why is this?' Before she can answer I hang up; partially in frustration, but mainly embarrassment over the fact that I suggested there's an in-house conspiracy on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

Barry Badrinath · 13-11-2016 03:31PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

Liberos always give me chips in seperate bags.

Im sound though.

13-11-2016 03:32PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

I verbally abused a woman who worked in the chipper last month, over the phone mind you. When I ring a chipper for me and someone else, I stipulate, on two occasions, that the chips are to be put in separate bags. It's a minor, I know, but f*ck separating a bunch of chips when it comes. But this one night, they weren't in separate bags and I lost it. 'Dial those c*nts back,' I say to the person whose phone I used. I take the phone and speak quite fast. 'Hi. I just ordered a delivery but the chips weren't in separate bags. Can your man come back?' There's a pause. 'Do you want delivery or collection?' she responds. 'No, no,' I say. 'It's already here but I want you to take it back and give me separate bags. I said it twice during the original call.'

Again, I know it's a minor thing, but being ignored isn't nice. 'Sorry sir but the driver has gone home already,' she says after I tell her my address. 'F*ck sake,' I say. 'Sorry but that's unacceptable'. I turn into a 69-year-old retired man when I'm complaining about something. Plus, these mugs have a long history of ignoring things; like delivering a can of Fanta when you ordered a bottle of Club Orange, or the most annoying thing of all, ordering a plain burger and finding tomato, onions, lettuce, mayonnaise and an Easy Single underneath the meat. 'You people have a history of ignoring my order. Why is this?' Before she can answer I hang up; partially in frustration, but mainly embarrassment over the fact that I suggested there's an in-house conspiracy on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

Next time you order from them, I bet you'll get some free sauce.

HalloweenJack · 13-11-2016 03:32PM

In my job, I deal a lot with the public.

There are two types of complaints: ones that are my fault and ones that aren't. With the ones that aren't, I'll simply say they aren't my fault and I refuse to discuss it further. I don't care about threats of any sort. If it's not my fault, I'm not taking responsibility for it.

Hammer89 · 13-11-2016 03:44PM

Candie wrote: »

Next time you order from them, I bet you'll get some free sauce.

There were a few chips in my bag of Italian pubes last time.

Robsweezie · 13-11-2016 04:41PM

Candie wrote:

Next time you order from them, I bet you'll get some free sauce.

He got very salty with them!

pragmatic1 · 13-11-2016 05:01PM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

So it bothered you?

Yes. I was a blubbering mess most nights after work.

uck51js9zml2yt · 13-11-2016 05:29PM

Hammer89 wrote: »

I verbally abused a woman who worked in the chipper last month, over the phone mind you. When I ring a chipper for me and someone else, I stipulate, on two occasions, that the chips are to be put in separate bags. It's a minor, I know, but f*ck separating a bunch of chips when it comes. But this one night, they weren't in separate bags and I lost it. 'Dial those c*nts back,' I say to the person whose phone I used. I take the phone and speak quite fast. 'Hi. I just ordered a delivery but the chips weren't in separate bags. Can your man come back?' There's a pause. 'Do you want delivery or collection?' she responds. 'No, no,' I say. 'It's already here but I want you to take it back and give me separate bags. I said it twice during the original call.'

Again, I know it's a minor thing, but being ignored isn't nice. 'Sorry sir but the driver has gone home already,' she says after I tell her my address. 'F*ck sake,' I say. 'Sorry but that's unacceptable'. I turn into a 69-year-old retired man when I'm complaining about something. Plus, these mugs have a long history of ignoring things; like delivering a can of Fanta when you ordered a bottle of Club Orange, or the most annoying thing of all, ordering a plain burger and finding tomato, onions, lettuce, mayonnaise and an Easy Single underneath the meat. 'You people have a history of ignoring my order. Why is this?' Before she can answer I hang up; partially in frustration, but mainly embarrassment over the fact that I suggested there's an in-house conspiracy on behalf Liberos to ruin my dinner every so often.

Only one solution....stop ordering from them...they will probably be very grateful for your lack of custom.:D

Penny Tration · 13-11-2016 05:30PM

I kill them with kindness if they're just rude. Big smile, fake sympathy, the works.

If they curse or call me a name, I say "please don't speak to me like that, I'm being polite and expect the same in return." If they continue, I walk away from them and refuse to deal with them.

That said, the place I work at has mostly fantastic customers. We've got one lady who's always complaining but always comes in, so we just act super nice to her and ignore the complaints. Aside from that, we've never really had any bad customers in the time I've been there. Most are polite and chatty, or say very little at all.

Would you let the public verbally abuse you for just doing your job??

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