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Farting in the sack

2»

Comments

  • #32
    Ruu
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,622 ✭✭✭Ruu


    Must be that bean I had. :o


  • #33
    rawn
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,093 ✭✭✭rawn


    I'm a woman and i fart like a tugboat in bed. It's my sexiest move.


  • #34
    Stigura
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,695 ✭✭✭Stigura




  • #35
    topmanamillion
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,642 ✭✭✭topmanamillion


    Best thread ever!

    I'd be careful about the Dutch ovens, I was going out with a lass years ago and I could feel a fire breathing fart coming on so I threw the covers over her and let rip.

    She hadn't told me she was genuinely claustrophobic.

    She panicked under the covers and flung her elbow into my mouth and split my lip.

    The result was her close to tears, my lip pumping blood and the smell of the previous nights Indian fueled noxious gas filling the room.


  • #36
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,819 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    Ruu wrote: »
    Must be that bean I had. :o
    Never try to flick a Malteser. Trust me on this.

    Not your ornery onager



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  • #37
    CruelCoin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,463 ✭✭✭CruelCoin


    I think this is rather fitting

    Fine to do it in the sack is there is some artistry to it



  • #38
    ToddyDoody
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,419 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    A related question. Anyone ever have the pleasure of hearing someone giving out stink about the smell you left in the toilet cubicle?


  • #39
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,819 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    A related question. Anyone ever have the pleasure of hearing someone giving out stink about the smell you left in the toilet cubicle?
    Never heard of a courtesy flush?

    Not your ornery onager



  • #40
    petes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,382 ✭✭✭petes


    'the last night', when in time is this exactly??


  • #41
    ToddyDoody
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,419 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    Esel wrote: »
    Never heard of a courtesy flush?

    Post flush of course. (I wouldn't even have thought of not flushing)


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  • #42
    Jim Bob Scratcher
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,231 ✭✭✭Jim Bob Scratcher


    petes wrote: »
    'the last night', when in time is this exactly??

    The night before the last night.


  • #43
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,819 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    Post flush of course. (I wouldn't even have thought of not flushing)
    That is not a courtesy flush.

    Not your ornery onager



  • #44
    ToddyDoody
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,419 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    Esel wrote: »
    That is not a courtesy flush.

    Who has time for that?


  • #45
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,819 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    Who has time for that?
    Yeah, it takes ages. :rolleyes:

    Not your ornery onager



  • #46
    ToddyDoody
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,419 ✭✭✭ToddyDoody


    Esel wrote: »
    Yeah, it takes ages. :rolleyes:

    Oh well, spilt milk.


  • #47
    Boom_Bap
    Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,740 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    Amateurs go for a Dutch Oven, pros can manoeuvre from a Dutch Oven to The Matador for the grand finale in a single fluid movement.


  • #48
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    rawn wrote: »
    I'm a woman and i fart like a tugboat in bed. It's my sexiest move.
    James Joyce would love you.


  • #49
    Estrellita
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 638 ✭✭✭Estrellita


    Several years with my OH, and he farts (if he really has to), then apologizes for it. I don't really mind to be honest. Although I never have farted around him, nor will I ever. I would die ten deaths if I ever let one slip out. He says he would pay good money to hear one :o


  • #50
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,819 ✭✭✭✭Esel
    Not Your Ornery Onager


    Sayings about farting:

    My dad: "Better out than the doctor."

    Friend: "Get out and walk!"

    Not your ornery onager



  • #51
    exaisle
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,681 ✭✭✭exaisle


    Esel wrote: »
    Sayings about farting:

    My dad: "Better out than the doctor."

    Friend: "Get out and walk!"

    "Smell that and die for Ireland..."

    "Good arse"


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  • #52
    cbyrd
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,214 ✭✭✭cbyrd


    Em...only after the honeymoon, is what I was told.. my daughters still believe mammys never fart .... ...... ( eldest is 17) I choose to believe them as I have dairy intolerance... Less said ..

    Edit ...
    I grew up with 6 brothers ...


  • #53
    CruelCoin
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,463 ✭✭✭CruelCoin


    exaisle wrote: »
    "Smell that and die for Ireland..."

    "Good arse"

    "Get thee behind me SATAN!"


  • #54
    chughes
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,740 ✭✭✭chughes


    ToddyDoody wrote: »
    A related question. Anyone ever have the pleasure of hearing someone giving out stink about the smell you left in the toilet cubicle?

    Years ago, in a previous place of employment, I was sitting on the pot unloading a particularly malodorous dump when I heard two departmental managers walk into the gents. Their flow of conversation abruptly ended with one of the managers exclaiming "Dear God.....".


  • #55
    Jim Bob Scratcher
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,231 ✭✭✭Jim Bob Scratcher


    chughes wrote: »
    Years ago, in a previous place of employment, I was sitting on the pot unloading a particularly malodorous dump when I heard two departmental managers walk into the gents. Their flow of conversation abruptly ended with one of the managers exclaiming "Dear God.....".

    You need to get yourself checked out by the Doc asap :pac:


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