Anti-Social Ireland

Vangelis

Forgot to say to Murderer:
I think it's nice when young people are up-beat and talkative!
Go ahead and talk to people. Maybe they feel the same way, that they will be looked upon as freaks if they make contact with a stranger. It can't be that bad.

Cianos

I think its just a product of city leaving that draws people away from eachother. The more densely populated somewhere is, the less connection there is between one individual and another. An interesting relation between space and people.

You see evidence of what little connection can remain in various situations though - take a lift with one other stranger and there is a little "bond", whether you speak or not you are intensely aware of the other persons presence.

I think its much more to do with environment rather than the condition of media and its effect on the populace.

Pighead, you will be delighted to hear that I had a very nice conversation with a guy I met at the Dart station. Even though the Dart was quite empty we then sat near eachother and continued to talk about all sorts. He even asked me in for a pint when we got to Bray, although I had to decline as I had to meet my friends.

miju

Pighead wrote:

old ladies arent scary

I beg to differ they scare the ever loving ****e out of me









no seriously they do

Vangelis

Cianos wrote:

I think its just a product of city leaving that draws people away from eachother. The more densely populated somewhere is, the less connection there is between one individual and another. An interesting relation between space and people.

You see evidence of what little connection can remain in various situations though - take a lift with one other stranger and there is a little "bond", whether you speak or not you are intensely aware of the other persons presence.

I think its much more to do with environment rather than the condition of media and its effect on the populace.

Yup! If there was a greater distance between people, they would perhaps feel the need to make the few bonds that they at all could. But still, why do most people frown at strangers chatting with oneanother? What is so... awkward about it?

Cianos wrote:

Pighead, you will be delighted to hear that I had a very nice conversation with a guy I met at the Dart station. Even though the Dart was quite empty we then sat near eachother and continued to talk about all sorts. He even asked me in for a pint when we got to Bray, although I had to decline as I had to meet my friends.

Sweet!

LadyJ

I absolutely love talking to random strangers! I prefer it to talking to my friends!
I got talking to some utter lunatic in the stamp duty office last week who loved talking to strangers as well. He made my day!

I dunno,I find that randomers chat to me a lot but I embrace it. It gives me a nice high.

--Kaiser--

See I would tend to agree with the not talking-to-strangers sort of thing than most people who have posted here

For example, the other week I was in Kilkee with a group of friends, we were going for an afternoon pint in one of the resorts' (cough) fine pubs. As i was waiting to order an old decrepit man starts talking to me, he was very hoarse and distinctly hard of hearing so conversation was stilted and difficult but I politely kept talking, all well and good til he finds out I was from Clare, where he proceeds to talk about hurling and hurlers for five minutes solid despite my protests that I neither followed nor knew anything about hurling. Even after I escaped he found me later on with my friends and then proceeded to talk interminably about hurling once more (my friends also don't give a T*ss about hurling)

another time I was sitting in a park reading a newspaper when an alcoholic parked himself besides me and proceeded to give me his life story, which was not so much interesting as wholeheartedly depressing, all the while swigging a naggen of poitin and looking for cigarette butts to smoke

so that type of experience does put me off
that plus I'm generally anti-social, people who talk exessively aggravate me no end, and I've had too many experiences working with people who are dull as dishwater as well as thick as s**t

fly_agaric

Pighead wrote:

I see it every day,old lady talks to cool young adult,cool young adult mumbles an inaudible one word reply and looks out the window leaving the old lady thinking,you're not cool sonny jim,you're a fool.Talking is good,old ladies arent scary

I wish nice old ladies would talk to me on the bus. The chatty people who sit beside on the bus always smell of beer and/or píss and want to talk at me in a deranged kind of way rather than have a pleasant conversation.

Actually this doesn't happen too often. Nobody normal will sit beside me until there are no seats left becuase I am very, very ugly, wear scruffy clothing and carry the black death on my front teeth.

Dimitri

Originally was going to agree with pighead when i first saw this thread but never got a chance to reply at the time. It was something i saw today though when i was waiting to get my bus in the pissing rain today that reminded me of it. Now there is usually a big crowd waiting for this bus and never in any particular order. Now this middle aged lady had been eating chicken wings under the shelter and you know how the sauce on that stuff usually goes all over the place, and she did get some on her face. When she had finished she duly wiped it awy however i noticed she missed a spot on her face. Turns out i wasn't the only one because there was this group of girls bout 14/15 subtly pointing and sniggering. Eventually a good few people became aware of it except the lady who seemed oblivious to what was going on. I thought to myself this is very bad form but no way was i going to say anything to her, thankfully another women took it upon herself to walk over to the lady and quietely say it to her. On the one hand maybe the op is correct we are an anti social bunch on the other hand on lady wasn't, isn't that just as good?

Kell

The one that took the absolute biccy for me was on CHRISTMAS morning. I was walkin in the hills of Dublin in the snow (beautiful it was too) and of the twenty or so people I wished a merry Christmas to, only about six replied. Six months before I was on Carauntoohill having my parties every action carefully watched over by bunches of random strangers making sure everyone knew where they were going.

Its odd that as many many people complain over in PI's that they are lonely and find it difficult to communicate with people, when the single greatest gift we have for communication is being forgotton in preference for faceless texts and e-mails. I wrote a similar thread to this one months back. The problem is obviously getting worse.

I would agree with the idea that media plays a part in it though. About a year ago, I was a tad hungover and walking home from a party on a Sunday afternoon. When I asked two early teen girls for directions, they nearly legged it. I was at least twenty feet away from them at that point too. If you barrage someone with thoughts that their kids are going to get assaulted all the time, you are going to wind up with a society that doesnt talk to eachother and cant communicate. Just look at PI's. LOL.

K-

Madge

I don't agree that technology has caused people to become anti-social. If anything, technology has facilited communication between people. The likes of chat forums are a blessing for people who are shy / depressed etc. Friendships / relationships can be made online and then people can meet up and have a chat face to face and build their social skills up. The 'Boards Beers' being an example.
People can now use txt to ask others out and flirt, which they probably wouldn't/couldn't do face to face. Romantic and friendly relationships have been formed because of this.

I agree that Ireland has become anti-social to a certain degree, but society has changed so much. The population is growing (I hate crowds!), lifestyles have become so much busier. Ireland is now much more dangerous- There are thugs, gangs, paedos walking the streets. All these factors combine to perhaps create a more anti-social Ireland.

chern0byl

Kell wrote:

Its odd that as many many people complain over in PI's that they are lonely and find it difficult to communicate with people, when the single greatest gift we have for communication is being forgotton in preference for faceless texts and e-mails.

I dont think your point is relevant to most of society. I think nerds/geeks are progressively getting more and more anti-social as technology has produced so many ways [especially in the last 10 years] to have faceless communication.

Most of my friends are not nerds[like myself] and they dont rely on email/the web etc for the basis of their communication. I can easily move between both which is cool.

simu

chern0byl wrote:

I think nerds/geeks are progressively getting more and more anti-social as technology has produced so many ways [especially in the last 10 years] to have faceless communication.

Are they chatting to bots or what?

Communicating with other humans is social whether it's done online or in the so-called real world(tm). You don't need to see a person's face to comminicate with them!

chern0byl

simu wrote:

Are they chatting to bots or what?

I agree with you to a certain extent but i dont think friends you only have online are genuine friends. I know personally from talking to fellow nerds..they are silent and lacking basic social skills to hold a conversation. They have been reclusive and online from their early teens, only had friends online and just lack the ability to have relationships of meaning in the real world.
I dont pity them or feel sorry. They are happy with that way of life and i am just calling it as i see it.

simu

chern0byl wrote:

I agree with you to a certain extent but i dont think friends you only have online are genuine friends. I know personally from talking to fellow nerds..they are silent and lacking basic social skills to hold a conversation. They have been reclusive and online from their early teens, only had friends online and just lack the ability to have relationships of meaning in the real world.
I dont pity them or feel sorry. They are happy with that way of life and i am just calling it as i see it.

Yeah, but would they have not been worse off in the old days? I mean chatting online is better than not chatting to anyone at all, ever. Or is it you think they would have been forced to engage with people in the real world(tm) in the old days because there was no other option and that they would have gotten over their social problems?

chern0byl

From talking to the old school nerds, its better and worse but in relation to this thread, they are in a much worse situation. Basically in the "old" days like you said, they had to talk to each other directly as that was really the only means of communication except for the phone phreaks. People have actually proven with technology today, you dont even have to leave your house to survive.

Personally, i have been the reclusive/anti or unsociable type and now the outgoing type. I much prefer being to latter...i can easily see a weekend disappear sitting at the puter except their always someone on the phone looking to go on the piss...i call em my saviours

simu

chern0byl wrote:

From talking to the old school nerds, its better and worse but in relation to this thread, they are in a much worse situation. Basically in the "old" days like you said, they had to talk to each other directly as that was really the only means of communication except for the phone phreaks. People have actually proven with technology today, you dont even have to leave your house to survive.

Personally, i have been the reclusive/anti or unsociable type and now the outgoing type. I much prefer being to latter...i can easily see a weekend disappear sitting at the puter except their always someone on the phone looking to go on the piss...i call em my saviours

Well, is it so bad never to go out? Is it so bad to be anti-social? Of course it is if it's making you miserable but might some people not be happier that way?

chern0byl

Ofcourse not. Whatever makes you happy. I discovered girls and music so out i go. I will say this though...if you were to take the most removed individual you could find(who said he was totally happy with that) and introduce him to engaging people and a more social way of living, do you think he would still be happy with the reclusive way?

I know there is no absolute, but in 99% of cases he would see the flaws in being so removed from society.

simu

chern0byl wrote:

Ofcourse not. Whatever makes you happy. I discovered girls and music so out i go. I will say this though...if you were to take the most removed individual you could find(who said he was totally happy with that) and introduce him to engaging people and a more social way of living, do you think he would still be happy with the reclusive way?

I know there is no absolute, but in 99% of cases he would see the flaws in being so removed from society.

Well, possibly.

Myself - I like a balance of both but I really need a good dose of solitude every now and then.

the_syco

Haven't read the thread, but here's my two cents:

A large reason for anti-social behaviour is that more people are moving into confined spaces, with not much to do. Look at all the "scum-bag" places, and I'd say there is little to do, but lots of young people of a similar age. Its becoming more noticeable now, as what used to keep the children content is now seen as "uncool", and thus large amounts are becoming restless.

If you looked back 10 years, and picked a group of people, 1% may have been anti-social. Now, that goup of people would be larger, and thus that 1% would be larger. Because of this, the anti-social percentage may seem higher, when in fact its the same, just that the percentage is a percent of a larger group of people.

DublinWriter

Personally I've found that....

The unfriendliness of a place is inversely proportional to (its density of population * times its throughput of tourists).

For example - Dublin very unfriendly, Midlands friendly, Galway unfriendly, etc, etc

aphex™

DublinWriter wrote:

The unfriendliness of a place is inversely proportional to (its density of population * times its throughput of tourists).

For example - Dublin very unfriendly, Midlands friendly, Galway unfriendly, etc, etc

Yeah so places like Ballymun/ Ballyfermot must be the friendliest places on earth.

DublinWriter

aphex&#8482 wrote:

Yeah so places like Ballymun/ Ballyfermot must be the friendliest places on earth.

They are actually. Have you lived, or know anyone, who have lived in either place?

We're talking about general friendliness here, not crime rate, BTW.

aphex™

DublinWriter wrote:

They are actually. Have you lived, or know anyone, who have lived in either place?

We're talking about general friendliness here, not crime rate, BTW.

No I don't actually but I live near a similar place on the southside where the people generally have fake dublin accents and live similar lives to people in the areas i mentioned. You probably haven't heard of the area so i didn't name it. There is a very negative vibe coming from the youth of the area (tracksuit clad like the areas named). This negativity has passed to other youths in the area who don't live in the council estate. You get a sense of danger when passing a group of them.

Generally the parents of these people are actually ok. We could be talking about two different generations DublinWriter.

My point was no tourist goes to these places anyway.

This thread isn't really about scumbags so i'll add something else:
Personally i don't talk to people for the following reasons:

1) Some people are fairly thick and just exclaim "Whaaaa?" whenever i say something to them.

2) Sometimes people can't comprehend what you're saying to them quickly enough. Eg. I said to somebody who was using the coffee machine that the milk in it had gone off, and they shouldn't bother. She just laughed a bit then got a dollop of cheese in her cappuchino.

Or "Did you see that car crash outside?" response: "haha" (from respectable old lady)

DublinWriter

aphex&#8482 wrote:

Personally i don't talk to people for the following reasons:

Whaaaa?

Cianos

DublinWriter wrote:

Whaaaa?

I agree! Making statements like that sounds like its you you should be talking about!

~Leanne~

Well i dont tend to use public transport much as i have a car but whenever i do, and some stranger starting having a conversation with me id think they were very weird!!! Its just ive never been used to strangers striking up conversations anywhere! Wish it was like back in the old days actully sometimes

nobodythere

DublinWriter wrote:

Personally I've found that....

The unfriendliness of a place is inversely proportional to (its density of population * times its throughput of tourists).

For example - Dublin very unfriendly, Midlands friendly, Galway unfriendly, etc, etc

Galway is not unfriendly ya bollox!

growler

I've noticed that irish people are becoming less ovetly social to random strangers but it's still a lot more friendly than many parts of the world. Whenever my english friends come with me to visit cork or clare for a weekend they are amazed t how friendly people can be.

I noticed myself becoming less willing to talk to strangers these days, particularly on planes and trains, time was whenever you got on a plane you were pretty cerrtain to be chatting to whoever you were sat with (unless sleeping) , now after a string of bad luck that had me sitting next to nuns, loons and smelly people I no longer make any effort to talk to my neighbours on planes or trains ( unless they are cute, obviously).

Kell

chern0byl wrote:

I dont think your point is relevant to most of society.

I of course disagree. While I am not of the 18-25yr old category, a lot of my friends/acquaintances are. With the exception of no one in that age category I know, their preferred method of communication is text. My nieces and nephews dont talk to their friends either. Its text.

K-