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Fell out with fellow housemates, need advice.

  • 03-07-2022 2:50pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    So, I'm an Irish lad from Dublin and I've been living in a house share in Dublin for 2 years. Originally it was all Irish people in the house, but one by one they moved out due to buying their own apartments and houses. I replaced them with 3 girls, Spanish A, Chilean B and Mexican C. I'll call them A B and C. They have all been quite dramatic, hostile and annoying.

    After living here for 6 months, Girl A, asked me if her BF of 4 months could move into one of the empty rooms, this was before C moved in, so were looking for someone to fill the room. I said no to this request as I don't want to live with a couple who will eventually commandeer all the shared space and team up in terms of house decisions. When I told A that I don't want her BF to move in she told me "You will regret that". Big red flags. She got our other housemate to fraudulently claim that the BF lived here, so he could get a PPS number and start working. I'm not sure if that's legal. So he was getting post here, not sure if he still is.

    The first month B and C moved in they wanted to buy a tumble dryer, which me and A disagreed with due to energy costs and the fact that we have 4 clothes horses. They wanted to ask our letting agency to buy a tumble dryer, which I told them they wouldn't, because it's not a necessity. This caused tension in the house for a while and sort of split the house into team tumble dryer and team no tumble dryer. So B and C formed a kind of alliance.

    At the time our dishwasher was broken and that was my priority to get fixed because it was leaking all over the floor every time it was used. It took me about 3 months of chasing the letting agent to get it fixed, but it was unrepairable as it was so old so they got us a new one.

    A starts to have her BF over quite often and usually they are drinking in the living room and sometimes, loudly and aggressively arguing, to the point I can hear it in my room while I'm listening to music. So me and A had an argument about how she isn't respecting the other housemates by doing this kind of thing. So me and A are not friends anymore.

    Me B and C hold a house meeting telling A that she can't be bring her BF over loads and can't be fighting in the common areas. A is hostile and doesn't do what we asked her.

    So fast forward a while and me and B start hanging out outside of the house, going shopping together, going for a drink. We are spending everyday together as I was between jobs. Me and B have an argument about a job interview I had (the company led me on, allowed me to meet the team and told me that they'd offer me the job but then reneged). I gave them some feedback on this **** behaviour and B said I shouldn't have.

    Anyway now me and B have fallen out. Next thing to come is a gas bill for like 380 quid, for a 2 month billing period. These girls start to pull some ****, like A and B saying they were away for 2 weeks at that time. C says she wasn't even in the house for a month. B says she never used the heating since A gave her an electric heater. So they try to get me to pay for the whole bill. The agreement was we split the bills, we all agreed this when we moved in. So eventually we all split this bill. We all pay 50 a month into a kitty for house expenses anyway.

    After this incident C cancels the FLOGAS contract and now we don't have heating in the house even if it is cold. Her logic was we keep getting massive bills and it's summer, which I get but still if it does get cold now we are fucked.

    The situation has devolved and threats have been made. I feel threatened by A's BF as he is bigger than me and also some random Spanish lad who drinks alcohol in my house and sometimes shouts.

    A talks on the phone to her BF every night for hours until like 11.30 or 12midnight. I have asked her multiple times to be quiet or go downstairs but she would rather be spiteful and disrespectful. I texted her about this recently and she freaked out, knocked on my door and started shouting at me.

    C and A wake up at 6am, I have asked them to be quiet in the mornings because I get up for work at about 7.45am. They have ramped up the noise in the mornings now to piss me off. Loading the dishwasher, closing doors vey loudly, just not trying to be civil or considerate.

    Anyway A B and C now basically have this alliance, they gang up on me in the group chat, blame **** on me, deny their own **** behaviour and call me names.

    I would go to the letting agency with all of this but two problems. 1. the letting agency is kind of useless and 2. I am no angel in this (I smoke a small bong, out my bedroom window, once a night, being careful to not make my room or the house smell of weed).

    Just looking for some advice on this **** as every time I say I will talk to the letting agency about these noise problems, A says "do you want me to start talking to the agency?"

    I know some advice will be "Move out", yes I am looking but the rent situation has devolved even worse since the 2 years I've lived here and I start a job on Monday and kind of need to live in this area as it has a good bus route to my job. I'm looking at places closer to my new job anyway. Any advice welcome, ideally I'd find a way for them all to leave and let me live in peace with new roommates.



«13

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 26,107 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    Who has signed the lease?



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 555 ✭✭✭laoisgem


    What age are you?



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    Just have a shite in the kettle and walk away.



  • Registered Users Posts: 953 ✭✭✭Ozark707


    As you say the reality of the housing market is that no one can walk away right now. So you have to figure a way how to live with it. I have been there and know how s****y it can become and how it takes a toll on you. One of the things I did was to try and get out of the house as much as possible. Evening walk/run, cinema, drink with a friend etc.

    Make sure if an opening comes up with A,B, or C leaving you know of someone who might join you. People are so desperate now they would probably jump at the chance.

    The other short term option is tell A that you expect her BF to pay rent, B and C might go for that and it might cause their alliance to weaken somewhat.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,585 ✭✭✭Dante




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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,146 ✭✭✭✭Caranica


    Who chose the other housemates and who do you pay the rent to, whose names are the bills in?

    Your OP suggests you chose these people, do you all have separate leases or one lease?



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,653 ✭✭✭✭amdublin


    Now I have a headache, thanks



  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    I have an even higher regard for crèche staff after reading that.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,141 ✭✭✭spakman


    Too much Latin blood - in their nature to be loud and argumentative. Not to mention that they're all female



  • Registered Users Posts: 590 ✭✭✭CrookedJack


    If one of your housemates hates you then they're the problem, if they all hate you then you're probably the issue.



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  • Posts: 1,344 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    So a Chilean, a Mexican & a Spanish housemates????? Man, that sure is a first world problem!!!!! You really have it hard....... some might say you didn't GET a fair bounce of the ball in life at all🤣



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 23,480 ✭✭✭✭mickdw



    You moved in 3 Hispanic / Latino women and you are surprised that things are abit dramatic.

    I'm sure you thought it was a great idea for a week or so.

    I don't agree with your request for quiet in the mornings. Your alarm time is fairly late in a working house and I don't really see you are entitled to beauty sleep right up to that time.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,361 ✭✭✭Padre_Pio


    Yeah... Move out.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,313 ✭✭✭✭Jim_Hodge


    I wonder what they'd say about you. Is it as much their home as yours?



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 69,631 ✭✭✭✭L1011




  • Registered Users Posts: 6,412 ✭✭✭Jequ0n


    Move. This isn’t salvageable at this point and you will always be in the minority. Having said this it sounds like you are as guilty as the rest in the sense of causing strife.



  • Registered Users Posts: 984 ✭✭✭Still stihl waters 3


    What sane man willingly picks 3 women to live with



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    This story just reminds me that I hate people.



  • Posts: 693 ✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    You would wonder then how the United Nations work peacefully!



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    We are all on the lease. They all pay me the rent though.



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  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    A stupid man who thought women are more calm and kind.



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk




  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    Ok I'll take that advice. I've been trying to get out of the house as much as possible. Going out for drinks on the weekend and stuff like that. In terms of getting one of my mates in to live here if one of them leaves, I think it's at the stage where they are trying to make me leave. I say that because since the situation has devolved they have become way more noisy at night and in the morning. I'm going to hang on here as long as humanly possible till I find somewhere else.



  • Registered Users Posts: 2,105 ✭✭✭rolling boh


    There are so many things going on that your best bet is to look at getting out I know that is easy to say but the situation looks a lost cause and you will never live in anything resembling harmony as house mates .



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,313 ✭✭✭✭Jim_Hodge


    They don't pay you the rent. You just collect it for the landlord - for some reason known only to yourself. They have as much say in all aspects, decisions and rules as you have.



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    Yeah I will always be in the minority, However I have not been trying to cause strife at all. I have been the one mediating disagreements between the other housemates, up until this situation devolved. It's just not a good situation, personality wise.



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    I chose the spanish one, then me and her interviewed a load of people. She said she thought latina people are very clean and have a lot of life in them, so she was kind of pushing for latina people. She didn't want brazilian or italian or asian or muslim people. The two irish people who viewed the gaf were kind of weird, but if they had been sound I would have gone for them.



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    I didn't have much experience with Latino women before this so didn't know about the loud and dramatic vibes.



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    They pay rent to me, my name is on the wifi, one girl is electricity, one girl was FLOGAS but she cancelled it, another pays for the bins but never changed it to her name.

    In terms of lease, we are all on the same lease.



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  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    You all sound irritating

    Maybe try and have clear the air talks with them. Try and start on a fresh note until you move out. Invest in some good ear plugs

    Post edited by [Deleted User] on


  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,146 ✭✭✭✭Caranica


    Why would you collect the rent for the landlord yet have a shared lease? All that hassle for no benefit! If you were the only one on the lease they'd be licensees and you could get them out.



  • Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators Posts: 10,444 Mod ✭✭✭✭Jim2007


    And given the rental market, what would you suggest the OP does the day after???? Go around and stay at your place?



  • Registered Users Posts: 31 Stalk


    Well all the rent has to be paid by one person. When I moved in, the "Main tenant" was collecting the rent, sorting out all the bills, cutting the grass, interfacing with the letting agency etc. So do you think I should ask one of the girls to be the one who collects the rent? Because the way the agency said it to me was the rent has to be paid in its total sum. Like they aren't renting rooms separately. I suppose it's just easier if everyone pays it into someone account? Or maybe It would make more sense for all of us to pay our share into the letting agencies account.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,313 ✭✭✭✭Jim_Hodge


    Weird set up. We used just all have standing orders to the landlord, when we were all on the lease.



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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,652 ✭✭✭wench


    Not that weird. Anywhere I rented where we were all on one lease, the landlord wanted one payment.



  • Registered Users Posts: 243 ✭✭LasersGoPewPew


    First mistake was picking 3 Latin women, they're notorious for creating drama going by friends experiences. Second mistake was not agreeing to asking for a dryer. New heat pump dryers use 1/4 the energy of a traditional dryer so electrical costs increase wouldn't be huge, it would be worth trying. Drying clothes Indoors also increases humidity and therefore promotes perfect conditions for mould growth, who wants to open windows all the time in Ireland unless you don't feel the cold?

    You need to move if at all possible.



  • Registered Users Posts: 1,860 ✭✭✭Pissy Missy


    Tbf ear plugs only do so much and I've invested in many different types



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,242 ✭✭✭brokenangel


    Single male thinks it’s a great idea to move in 3 single Latino women….I think we can fill in the rest


    No idea how you managed to rent out the rooms, collect and manage the house it seems yet have no power over the other tenants

    At this stage your only option is move out as the situation will not get any better. In fact it will just get worse and worse as the weeks go on



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,242 ✭✭✭brokenangel


    How much is the heat pump dryer? If the agent doesn’t buy it how do you spilt it up when leaving?

    Sounds like they live in a city and plenty of places available to wash and dry clothes



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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 436 ✭✭Girl Geraldine


    ye are all as bad as eachother in my opinion. Them being dramatic, and you smoking drugs out the window.



  • Registered Users Posts: 506 ✭✭✭asdfg87


    It seems to me these girls know all the tricks, i notice they all have or had utility bills in their name which is needed for banking etc, who's name is the bins in simce you said she not change it.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    You couldn't possibly believe that opening post is genuine.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,411 ✭✭✭corner of hells




  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 232 ✭✭Feenix


    I think I'm on their side.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 608 ✭✭✭tvjunki


    You do realise that they are going to have an issue with the electric bill now if there are small heaters in the bedrooms? The rates have increased so there will be another row over that bill. Most heaters cost more than gas heating. The electric bill will be larger than usual.

    Also if the gas account is closed and there is no account set up there will be a new charge after a certain length of time to check the gas system and that is not going to be cheap. The landlord will not be happy hearing the house is not heated correctly. The landlord may be given a bill to reconnect.

    There should have been an agreement the bills equally split whether someone is there or not. Less hassle. They pay if they like it or not. If they dont like it they move out. A meter reading should have been taken when the person moved in mid bill so they pay their share of the bill after that date.

    You need to sort yourself out with the drugs and get off that as they can get you removed by contacting the agent. You may find you are out on the street. Also having the window open does not stop the smell of drugs going through the house.

    Would not like to be in such a toxic situation.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,383 ✭✭✭✭Donald Trump


    You do realise that they are going to have an issue with the electric bill now if there are small heaters in the bedrooms?

    They could save over 200 pounds a year by running the electricity off the gas and the gas off the electricity



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,261 ✭✭✭Gant21


    This is a challenging one to resolve. Forgiveness is the first step.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,456 ✭✭✭Ray Palmer


    I have ended up renting to a group of south American women. Every 4 months they contact me about some argument they have and how they want somebody kicked out for their behaviour. I have told them on every occasion that they are adult and they need to deal with it. They move in and out so regularly it is hard to keep track of who is there. Seems to be something to do with visas that I can't understand. I have to re register with the PRTB so much I am thinking I will charge people a fee for breaking leases



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,717 ✭✭✭YFlyer


    So hot water at the sinks is heated using the immersion? Electricity going to be high. During the winter there be cold rooms throughout the apartment.



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