Bird moving into my gaff - what’s fair to charge her?

Ham Grenade

What’s the usual situation for this. My girlfriend of 18 months is moving in next month to my apartment which I own outright. What is a reasonable financial arrangement to propose? Don’t what it to look like I’m paying for sexy time but I feel she should pay something

sprucemoose

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058249584/bird-moving-into-my-gaff-what-s-fair-to-charge-her

if you own it outright, split the bills. if youre paying a mortgage get her to contribute towards that

mr j tayto

For any bird, a box of Thrill a week should be sufficient, I would think.

Mech1

Trill is the word your looking for.

SCOOP 64

Day rate or Night rate ?

Real Donald Trump

Be prepared to lose it all

Gant21

Council house rates €25 a week.

Ham Grenade

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181061#Comment_119181061

Don’t have a mortgage. But I feel she should contribute beyond bills

Donald Trump

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/2058249584/bird-moving-into-my-gaff-what-s-fair-to-charge-her

Jesus Christ. 18 months is very young. They meant years, not months, when they told you the minimum age.

Am off to report you to the cops.

Strumms

50/50 on bills.. electricity, heat insurance, shopping etc

to be honest I’d just quote her a figure… say you’ve been through the bills and her monthly contribution to the running needs to be xxxx…

any debate, negotiation or pullback just don’t entertain it… like it or lump it. Don’t put yourself in a spot.

sprucemoose

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181132#Comment_119181132

well done

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181127#Comment_119181127

well prepare to open up a can of worms. if ye were married would you expect rent? most likely not and while yer not in exactly the same situation, id be looking at it from that POV. yep shes getting the better deal by getting free rent essentially but if anything goes south then you'll still have the gaff

UsBus

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181127#Comment_119181127

Keep it to 50/50 on bills. Will be much simpler down the line if it doesn't work out. As long as your property is in good nic, you'll still have the asset in years to come.

Roger Mellie Man on the Telly

Have her cook all your meals and wash your clothes. "Beauty will not make the pot boil".

snowcat

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181159#Comment_119181159

Jaysus dont be tight. You are obviously doing ok to own your own apartment. The women love that so i would not charge her but if she mis behaves give her the boot.

piplip87

I'd suggest you let her find somewhere else. Your suggesting she should pay rent to live in your house ? Your obviously not ready to share your space with her.

When she moves in it will be her home too thats what normally happens when couples move in together, I don't feel your ready for that and it will still be your home with a lodger....

Amadan Dubh

Moving in with you means it's her home too. Soon you will be sharing a bank account. If you can't commit to her then why are you moving in?

lawred2

She'll be delighted to hear that you see her as a tenant in your paid for gaff.

walshb

If she’s at all decent, a keeper you won’t need to have any conversation, or bring this up; she will bring it up and offer/insist on contributing to pay the mortgage.

edit: it’s paid. I’d not be charging her a cent in rent.

SEPT 23 1989

If it all goes wrong it’s her house now and you will be that guy sitting on the canal bank drinking Lidl own brand cans of beer talking to the swans at 11 o’clock on a Tuesday morning

standardg60

If you bring it up you're a tight wad and she'll quickly see you're not for her. Conversely if she doesn't immediately offer to share the bills ditto, simples.

I certainly wouldn't be expecting more than outgoings to be shared though, given you have no mortgage, if you feel entitled to rent on top because she'd be paying it elsewhere, then you are indeed a tight wad.

Confused11811

Protect yourself and your financial security. Come up with a house share agreement with her as a licensee. Bills to be paid 50/50 along with the agreed rate of rent. Declare your "earnings" under the revenue rent a room scheme.

It's all roses in the garden now but when the five year itch kicks in the thorns will show. If you've not protected yourself she could have a claim over your property. You've alot more to loose financially than her.

You own an apartment.

Your girlfriend is moving in.

You need to ask on Boards what to charge.

I predict you will be homeless in about 9 months and she will have your car as well.

Potential-Monke

It's a bit different seeing as you already outright own the place. Bills should be 50/50, men and women are equal these days, no room for chivalry. When I had the house and mortgage, I charged herself €300 a month, far less than what she was paying in rent and just under 1/3rd of the monthly mortgage. The intent was she would join me on the mortgage at some point, but after I told her I wanted €10k as the deposit cost me €20k and I was only in there a year before she moved in. Only fair she pays half, including the deposit, imo. Anyway, that didn't happen because we're both smart and realised it may not work out as intended. Which was good, because it didn't work out as intended (we broke up because she started getting serious about having kids, mutual agreement about 2 years later).

I mean, why shouldn't someone who is living in your house pay towards the upkeep (rent) and bills? If there was a mortgage, would people expect to let her live there rent free just because "love"?

standardg60

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181467#Comment_119181467

No offence but you sound exactly like the OP. She started getting serious?

No she was just committed to the natural progression of the relationship, which you never were, considering your demands.

sprucemoose

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181296#Comment_119181296

titling the discussion 'bird moving into my gaff' suggested the same to me tbh

Do not cohabitate until you have read this "Rights of Cohabitating Couples" and researched the subject in far greater detail.

You really should have done this before now.

What to charge? Shared utility bills and groceries only.

Do not charge "rent" or seek contributions towards apartment maintenance (management fees?) and keep all utilites in your name only.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181127#Comment_119181127

Is this a girlfriend or a tenant that will be moving in!? Fairplay to her if she's happy to give you money for rent when the apartment is already paid off. But if I owned my own place and my boyfriend moved in, no way would I be asking for rent nor expecting to pay it if the shoe was on the other foot.

Donald Trump

Don’t what it to look like I’m paying for sexy time

OP, you need to realise that you are, and always will be, paying for sexy time. The only question is how much!

Leg End Reject

Would she not be more at home in a nest? Get her a perch at least and let her out the window a few times a day.

Fandymo

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181743#Comment_119181743

You’re a woman though. If it went on it’s arse you’d be entitled to your house. If after a few years this goes on it’s arse she’ll have a claim on the apartment as a cohabiting partner.

Alls well and good at the start, but the claws are soon out if it doesn’t end well.

Pissy Missy

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/119181769#Comment_119181769

Surely it would work both ways, like if my said boyfriend moved in for 5 years, surely he could make a claim on my house too if it went belly up, it's hardly one rule for a man, one rule for the woman