There will be a rise in incel related terror attacks

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829013#Comment_117829013

That would be great. Would be no harm examining a “site” such as this. There are a number of angry male users who, clearly, have “issues” with women.

Successful women, female celebrities and politicians are always their “targets”. While I’m not sure any of them would have the drive, or alacrity, to get out of the house, but it would be nice if something like this could be used to identify and address these “problem” users.

Although, like with Apple looking to scan phones for child abuse images, I’m sure this will be met with the same “resistance” by the very same people.

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829382#Comment_117829382

And you have 23. What’s your point? I fire off a few posts during the working day. Wouldn’t see too many of them being “problematic” either.

No, I have an active social life. Granted it’s only getting back on track now since the start of he pandemic but active none the less. Lots of friends. Certainly not an incel type, I would have “put it about” quite a bit in my single days. Permanently partnered up now and enjoying a healthy relationship.

Wouldn’t be too keen on all that self pity, anger or hatred. Sounds exhausting and miserable.

If most INCELs got off the internet for a couple of hours a day and lowered their ridiculous standards they'd vastly improve their social skills and increase their chances of finding a partner.

I know a chap (a brother of a friend) and I was chatting to him one day and he asked me for advice on how to get a date. His main gripe was that he has zero matches on Tinder. He was in his early 20s, a virgin and had never been on a date.

I asked him to show me his account and he did. He had two awful selfies from awful angles. He also wrote nothing in his profile.

We were hanging out in a group so I told him I'd take a few natural photos of him throughout the day. I got three or four good ones, I told him to pick two and throw them up (don't want people thinking he only has one rigout). Then had a look at his Facebook and found another three and told him to throw them up and write a bit about his interests and that in his bio.

I then told him to start swiping and **** hell he was the fussiest fella I've seen swipe on Tinder. Left, left, left, left, left.

He was an ordinary looking fella (certainly no gremlin) and he was swiping left on women leagues above his station.

"What's wrong with her?"

"Not attractive enough."

I took the phone off him and swiped until he ran out of likes. I told him to do the exact same tomorrow and the next day.

A few days later he text saying he had three matches and was chatting to one of them.

They hung out and couple of times but things fizzled out.

He's now been going out with someone else for several months.

You have to give yourself a chance, you can't expect the world to just land someone in your lap.

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829483#Comment_117829483

Oh, I never said it was full of them. Just seems to be a few who’d “fit the bill”.

My usage of this site would be exclusively on the mobile so wouldn’t be “glued” to it, as others may be.

While misplaced, your concern is appreciated. So thank you for that.

completedit

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829556#Comment_117829556

This makes no sense. You like what you're attracted to, that's it. I'd hate for someone to date me who found me unattractive so there's no point for your friend here to match with girls he doesn't find attractive.

growleaves

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829347#Comment_117829347

People who are guilty of serious harassment are already identified and prosecuted.

If you're talking about identifying people with 'problem attitudes' yes that will be met with resistance lots of other people too.

Wibbs

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829623#Comment_117829623

There's an element to that, however judging by photos alone is not a great plan. People, men and women can be very different in the flesh. Positively and negatively. Some people are photogenic some are not.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829698#Comment_117829698

And yet, in the grand scheme of things, the numbers of white people who live in SE Asia for longer than a year is pretty small. Besides, that ship has mostly sailed and white males are generally treated the same as everyone else. There's some remnants of the past white worship, but nothing like the way it used to be.

Anyone could be an incel... it's not dependent race but attitude.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829623#Comment_117829623

Attraction is not that absolute at all!

What we think, how we behave, who we're attracted to, it's all affected by many things, most notably the culture/environment we're immersed in.

Spend all day looking at women on the internet, you're going to start comparing porn stars, movie stars and supermodels to each other - the idea of what a normal woman looks like is going to be a distant memory. Add to that the fact that when you're online all the time you lose empathy for the people you're looking at. You'll become more judgmental, less affected by personality or body language, and much less interested in an average looking woman. You'll also end up thinking mad stuff about women like 'they don't have armpit hair' and 'they can hold in their periods' 🙄 If you don't spend any proper time with women, you haven't scratched the surface of understanding what you're attracted to.

It's like when you see documentaries about plastic surgery, and people who get immersed in the world of plastic surgery and just want more and more done. By the end, they barely look human to someone like me, but to them, that's what normal looks like, and that's what they find attractive. Same for other types of body modification, or certain cultures/styles. People aren't just born attracted to one thing; it's affected by everything around us and it changes over time.

Sonics2k

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117794332#Comment_117794332

I literally cannot express just how bad of an idea it is to listen to JBP about anything relating to women.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829870#Comment_117829870

That's a great post.

Well summed up.

There's a lot of white knights in this thread. Ready to defend the ladies and pour scorn on the Incels.

Pretty much par for the course. There is something to this Incel lark. I am happily married although could have been described as Incel up until a few years ago as I spent many years single. What I found was that, say for our parents generation, there was generally one man for one woman and people tended to couple up and start families quite young. By contrast with online dating, I find that 90% of the women compete over the top 10% of guys, who in turn can play the field as they are inundated with options. This leaves the women and the remaining 90% of men unhappy and living off scraps. It's just very unhealthy and the only real winners are the top echelon of guys who don't want to settle down.

completedit

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830304#Comment_117830304

This is the problem with this mindset and why you have to go for who you are attracted to.

nj27

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117829347#Comment_117829347

I'm not sure exactly how it would work, but the boffins and Apple etc might be able to figure out an algorithm which could identify dangerous incels, or those who propagate the ideology online? It is probably the number one terrorist threat in the west at the moment, so surely advanced state/private sector surveillance is warranted? I imagine we would all feel a lot safer knowing that the incel faction were eliminated from society. The only question is how we would go about it. This remains to be seen.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830101#Comment_117830101

I find it a bit disconcerting when men who condemn hatred of women are referred to as white knights. As though the alternative would be better...

A guy looking for someone and having no joy and feeling lonely and sad about it - he's not the person being condemned here. And a guy who's just single certainly isn't. Why would you have been described as an incel?

The "whatever colour pilled" woman haters are those who are being condemned... and to a lesser extent the ones who aren't as hostile towards women but spout off all that "chad", "cope" shyte and ignore reams of advice and reason.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830101#Comment_117830101

There's your mistake (and a mistake for a lot of other people).. you're judging dating by online dating.

Online dating is generally superficial, far too focused on sex and cheating, and is full of people lying about themselves. The genuine people are caught by the nature of the internet, whereby people have unrealistic expectations due to the emphasis on physical beauty, and variable success with marketing oneself. People are too used to presenting a side of themselves online which doesn't exist outside of it, and therefore, people are going to be disappointed when actual meetings happen.. and even then, the superficial nature of online dating (with it's strong emphasis on sex) means that few encounters have any real meaning.

People really should get off the internet, and meet people in the real world.

The literal meaning of involuntarily celibate has been cast aside. "Incel" means the woman haters.

But "incel" is used as a label for the misogynistic crowd. I don't think it's correct either but it has become a negative term for a negative person.

growleaves

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830385#Comment_117830385

Disagree strongly. There was one guy a few years ago (Elliot something?) and then one guy recently in the UK. There are always people with personal problems who occasionally flip. 'The number one terrorist threat' Lol. There are only a handful of these guys on a few web sites. Without media magnification they wouldn't have one-thousandth of the cultural influence they've had handed to them.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830476#Comment_117830476

No, I've been lonely, I've never been an incel. Being an incel is self-declared, and indicates that you ascribe certain viewpoints to the fact that you're lonely. In particular, the idea that your loneliness is a wrongdoing on society's part, being forced upon you. Have you tried googling it?

The first page of results includes: "Incel: A new terror threat?" "Why incels hate women" "Incel: a person (usually a man) who regards himself or herself as being involuntarily celibate and typically expresses extreme resentment and hostility toward those who are sexually active"

The very first hit is Wikipedia:

An incel is a member of an online subculture of people who define themselves as unable to get a romantic or sexual partner despite desiring one. Discussions in incel forums are often characterized by resentment and hatred, misogyny, misanthropy, self-pity and self-loathing, racism, a sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against women and sexually active people. The American nonprofit Southern Poverty Law Center (SPLC) described the subculture as "part of the online male supremacist ecosystem" that is included in their list of hate groups.

EmmetSpiceland

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830584#Comment_117830584

Unless you subscribe to the misogyny, misanthropy, self-pity and self-loathing, racism, the sense of entitlement to sex, and the endorsement of violence against women and sexually active people you are not a true “incel”.

What’s that old saying again? It’s not the size of the fedora, it’s how you tip it.

Larbre34

Anti-social terrorism. I've heard it all now. In fact, I so badly do not want to live in a World where its a thing, I hope the first attack gets me.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830476#Comment_117830476

Strange, I always considered that to be a dry spell.

Honestly people, it's not that hard to get laid if you are willing to drop your standards somewhat, get off your ass and explore further afield. It's mostly comes down to a numbers game at that point.. but if you're staying in a place with few numbers, you're sabotaging yourself. right from the beginning. The problem is that people expect it to happen because they went to a nightclub or opened a profile on tinder. Hardly any effort made at all.. and the world hates me that I didn't succeed with my lazy approach to getting laid.

A guy feeling lonely and sad is simply a guy who is having a dry spell. An incel is someone who wants sympathy for that, and support while swimming in the associated bitterness. Ever notice how some people seem to be happier when they're depressed and able to chat with other depressed people about it? A group swim in the sea of depression and angst over the state of their lives, while doing very little to change their circumstances. That's what an Incel is.

I used to have some sympathy for incels, but honestly, I've lost my patience with them, because it's all so pathetic. Just hop on a plane to Barcelona, Turin, or Berlin. Get a single room in a hostel (private), and boom.. your dry-spell will likely be gone within a day or two. Likely cheaper than a night out drinking in Dublin too.

There are definitely those who just want to wallow and do nothing about it, but I don't think it's that easy for some guys to get laid, due to psychological barriers. And not all people want to drop their standards and just carry out the physical act and leave it at that.

Plus there are guys for whom being lonely is not a dry spell, it's just life.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830648#Comment_117830648

There are always options. The problem being that they require some groundwork to be done.

There will always be some guys who are rarely, if ever, be successful.. but they're a distinct minority. The remainder need to acquire confidence but when they have a posse of online friends willing to stoke their bitterness, there's little incentive to gain that confidence.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117830641#Comment_117830641

I don't need to. It's bs. Involuntary celibate. Good lord. People who say these things are turning into Americans far too hooked into the social sciences.

Fighting Tao

Words and phrases morph over time. Susie Dent would tell you that. Incel no longer means those who are going through a dry spell no matter how long. It now has a more sinister definition.

Fighting Tao

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117831295#Comment_117831295

Words change meaning over time. Misogynist still exists. Misogynist does not equal incel, as it is possible to be misogynistic without being an incel.

Fighting Tao

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117831575#Comment_117831575

That is what incel originally meant. It has evolved since then. There are other examples in the English language, e.g. literally does not only mean what it originally meant.

https://www.boards.ie/discussion/comment/117831295#Comment_117831295

Incels are an informal movement. A club for frustrated and bitter men. A group. A phrase that allowed the claiming of identity, and connecting with others with the same identity.