After how long with zero success should I delete my pic profile

completedit

Online dating is an absolute sham. I can't imagine what it's like for a non rich and average looking guy on there! Irish women absorb all the worst aspects of American culture and in many ways exaggerate it to the extremes. Height for instance. Irish women are small yet it is now becoming ubiquitous to demand a 6 foot guy MINIMUM.

No Blacks
No Dogs
No Irish
No sub 7/10's

Dunnes Store's workers went on strike for less discrimination than exists out there right now! It's eugenics masked by 'preferences' and 'you're attracted to what you're attracted to'. We were told we wouldn't be rock stars or musicians but who knew that the caste ****ing system was going to appear again in the west? Average men are the new untouchables. Ugly men - well let's just say there are cockroaches that might have more value in 21st century society.

The One Doctor

I did online dating for years, got plenty of dates but nothing else. Met my wife in work.

Potential-Monke

Like the OP, I've had zero luck on dating apps/sites, I've tried POF, Bumble, Tinder, AdultFriendFinder, and a few others I can't think of. Facebook is trying to get me in on the Facebook dating craic, but to be honest, not while there's still a pandemic ongoing, thanks!

I discovered that, regardless of what I put in my profile, I'm just not what women think they want. I'm only 5'6", but apparantly if you put your actual height down then it's already considered to be taller than what you actually are. And at 5'6", I'm basically out of the running for most women on these apps. Include that I'm ginger and don't look like Jason Momoa, well, yeah, no success. As far as i'm concerned, dating apps are shopping lists for women, the man is always starting on the back foot, simply because a lot of women on these apps think highly of themselves and think they can get their Momoa, and it's flooded with men both single and in relationships just looking to get the ride.

I gave up after about 6 years of trying. It was taking up too much time for literally no return. I accepted that I'm not visually attractive enough to even garner a bit of attention. I don't think I'm ugly, but I'm just not what most women appear to look for. I could prove I'm an excellent partner if they gave me a chance, but they won't even reply. And it gets you down after a while, makes you think there's something wrong with you. My suggestion it to get off them all and start to live life like you don't need no woman. Be happy with yourself first, and if a woman happens to want to be part of it, great. If not, well, at least you don't have to deal with all the negative aspects of relationships! There's always Asian/Russian brides!! Soon as I have a few quid spared up, I'll probably buy a Japanese wife*.

* I most likely won't

Burt Renaults

completedit wrote: »

Online dating is an absolute sham. I can't imagine what it's like for a non rich and average looking guy on there! Irish women absorb all the worst aspects of American culture and in many ways exaggerate it to the extremes. Height for instance. Irish women are small yet it is now becoming ubiquitous to demand a 6 foot guy MINIMUM.

I'm a non-rich, barely-average-looking guy (and that's on a good day, in a certain light), several inches short of six foot, and I've never felt hugely disadvantaged. If you're a decent human being, who can make people smile and are able to string a thingy together in terms of, like, sentences 'n shit, I reckon you'll have a fair chance of finding someone on a dating site or app.

ulster

jimjangles wrote: »

I've been on plenty of fish for many months and have had zero success.
No views, no conversations, nothing.
I tried putting up a photo, deleting my photo etc.
How long with no activity or success whatsoever is long enough to say screw it this is useless it's time to delete this?
I'm a male by the way so looking for answers from a male perspective.

I swiped Tinder off my phone. I've been successful ever since. Haha.

BalboBiggins

riclad wrote: »

put more info in your profile,
eg your interests ,hobbies, eg sports,music ,books etc
Women dont simply go by looks.
some women want someone who can hold a conversation about various subjects and be funny .
join a club .dating is not easy ,even celebs use dating apps

jimjangles wrote: »

I'm trying Bumble but I can't see how I could
have any luck on that as it's the same as Tinder.
I'd never meet anyone on that.
They"ll all just swipe left like they did on
Tinder.
It's useless.
I need to give up this crap.
I'm going to delete my pof profile in a couple of days
and will end up deleting my Bumble after
a week of rejection and nothingness.

Are you the same lad?

SnuggyBear

Use a photo of Brad pitt. Sorted.

YellowLead

And y’all think women don’t get judged by men for their looks?

The reality is when it comes to dating if it was so tough for men and so easy for women nobody would ever get together.

The apps are hard work for both genders as is dating in general, but people who are positive attract others and that coupled with perseverance and a smattering of wit/charm and being a good person (but not too boring) can go a long way...

I ended up being really attracted to a guy who as shorter than me because he was charming and funny.

It works both ways also...managing expectations...not every guy can date a supermodel.

The funny thing is, the fellas that admit they're ugly are expecting stunners to match with them, yet they look down on anyone who isn't a 'stunner'.

completedit

YellowLead wrote: »

And y’all think women don’t get judged by men for their looks?

The reality is when it comes to dating if it was so tough for men and so easy for women nobody would ever get together.

The apps are hard work for both genders as is dating in general, but people who are positive attract others and that coupled with perseverance and a smattering of wit/charm and being a good person (but not too boring) can go a long way...

I ended up being really attracted to a guy who as shorter than me because he was charming and funny.

It works both ways also...managing expectations...not every guy can date a supermodel.

Take what you can get appears to be the message here :rolleyes::rolleyes:

Well some of us refuse to simply be like hyenas and take the scraps of whatevers left. We see what men of a certain calibre get and we want that too. These man have harems, groupies, side pieces, fwbs, summer time flings and loving romance. Are you saying we don't deserve some of that too?

YellowLead

completedit wrote: »

Take what you can get appears to be the message here :rolleyes::rolleyes:

Well some of us refuse to simply be like hyenas and take the scraps of whatevers left. We see what men of a certain calibre get and we want that too. These man have harems, groupies, side pieces, fwbs, summer time flings and loving romance. Are you saying we don't deserve some of that too?

So if a woman isn’t a supermodel she is a leftover ‘scrap’
Hmmm and yet the guys in the same boat complaining they can’t get women are certainly not scraps...okay...

Look at the end of the day everybody is entitled to go after what they want and I am an advocate for not settling for somebody you’re not into just to avoid being alone. But there’s a certian attitude coming from some men that they only deserve the best looking women despite being perhaps less than physically and mentally appealing themselves.

McGinniesta

Change it to a massive shaft and hairy stones

jimjangles

YellowLead wrote: »

So if a woman isn’t a supermodel she is a leftover ‘scrap’
Hmmm and yet the guys in the same boat complaining they can’t get women are certainly not scraps...okay...

Look at the end of the day everybody is entitled to go after what they want and I am an advocate for not settling for somebody you’re not into just to avoid being alone. But there’s a certian attitude coming from some men that they only deserve the best looking women despite being perhaps less than physically and mentally appealing themselves.

I think or at least hope I look ok in real life.
In photos I always end up looking like Shrek so that may actually be part of the problem.
I was never expecting a supermodel but at least something.
That being said I suppose we all tend to hope to find a girl who we find physically attractive.
If there's no attraction there at all then there really is just no point.

YellowLead

jimjangles wrote: »

I think or at least hope I look ok in real life.
In photos I always end up looking like Shrek so that may actually be part of the problem.
I was never expecting a supermodel but at least something.
That being said I suppose we all tend to hope to find a girl who we find physically attractive.
If there's no attraction there at all then there really is just no point.

Totally agree (that people need to find each other attractive) . And absolutely photos can be the downfall of many a profile, rather than the attractiveness in person. So photos and profile text are worth spending time on.

Potential-Monke

Burt Renaults wrote: »

I'm a non-rich, barely-average-looking guy (and that's on a good day, in a certain light), several inches short of six foot, and I've never felt hugely disadvantaged. If you're a decent human being, who can make people smile and are able to string a thingy together in terms of, like, sentences 'n shit, I reckon you'll have a fair chance of finding someone on a dating site or app.

Pretty sure I have that, considering it's feedback I constantly get when I ask female friends. But then again, who's to say they're not just saying what I want to hear to make me feel better...

Deleted User wrote: »

The funny thing is, the fellas that admit they're ugly are expecting stunners to match with them, yet they look down on anyone who isn't a 'stunner'.

What about us who don't get any replies regardless?

YellowLead wrote: »

Totally agree (that people need to find each other attractive) . And absolutely photos can be the downfall of many a profile, rather than the attractiveness in person. So photos and profile text are worth spending time on.

Also spent quite a bit of time on them, even got female friends to help out and a professional photohrapher friend to try and make me look better somehow, still didn't work. Profiles, I've tried so many different variations that I honestly believe it actually doesn't matter unless you have "the look", only then does the content matter, because they've already swiped off you.

I'm convinced that even if I win the lotto, I still won't settle down and remain single. I couldn't convince myself that women are suddenly attracted to me and it's not because of the money...

completedit

I notice people have start to accept this. There's no telling the affect American culture has had on anyone born after 1985s brains.

jimjangles

This is bleak really.
Makes me want to give up right now and
just forget about it.
I think I'll quit online dating in about a week.
No matter how many photos I take if women are not attracted to me then they're not attracted to me.
So in about a week if nothing happens then it's never going to happen.
That's how I feel about it anyway.
Doesn't matter what you say in your profile women are
extremely shallow more shallow and critical of every little
thing than men.
That's a fact.
I think if they find any little thing wrong they won't message you.
That's why I never got anywhere on it.

completedit

jimjangles wrote: »

This is bleak really.
Makes me want to give up right now and
just forget about it.
I think I'll quit online dating in about a week.
No matter how many photos I take if women are not attracted to me then they're not attracted to me.
So in about a week if nothing happens then it's never going to happen.
That's how I feel about it anyway.
Doesn't matter what you say in your profile women are
extremely shallow more shallow and critical of every little
thing than men.
That's a fact.
I think if they find any little thing wrong they won't message you.
That's why I never got anywhere on it.

I saw this coming.i have great insight into the human condition and I could see aa ruthless harsh economical approach to dating coming around the corner.i never thought it would get this bad though. I first noticed it when my mates would out average girls on a pedestal and would act as if it was the most outrageous thing in the world that a girl like that would be into you. This is the origins of simp culture.

It's very very depressing but it's nothing you or I did wrong! It's as fatalistic we the way some people will just come into this world and live and die poor in awful conditions. Some people in the west will die alone. Many men, average and ugly men will face that reality. Thank female biology, sexual liberation, end of patriarchy and the media.

Burt Renaults

jimjangles wrote: »

Doesn't matter what you say in your profile women are
extremely shallow more shallow and critical of every little
thing than men.

If your opinion of women is that low, why would you want to date one anyway?

Potential-Monke wrote:

Also spent quite a bit of time on them, even got female friends to help out and a professional photohrapher friend to try and make me look better somehow, still didn't work. Profiles, I've tried so many different variations that I honestly believe it actually doesn't matter unless you have "the look", only then does the content matter, because they've already swiped off you.

I'm wearing a stupid novelty face-mask in one of my Tinder photos and fellating an ice-cream in another. Both pictures fit my stupid personality quite well. They were taken on a crap camera phone during lunch breaks at work. Zero effort. I think (and I could be completely wrong here) that enrolling the assistance of a professional photographer is the second worst thing you can possibly do to an online dating profile (the worst is taking your top off). A big mistake people often make is that they make such an effort to look as attractive as possible that all they're left with is a photo of a person trying to look as attractive as possible.

The best "look" is of someone comfortable in their own skin, doing something they enjoy.

Potential-Monke

I blame the constant and consistent reinforcement of what love "is" and "should be" by media, mainly aimed at women and especially aimed at girls 13-25+. Be it TV, music, movies, books, they all create this romanticised version of love which is just not attainable. Yes, not all, but most romantic films are like this, and lots of girls in that age bracket fall hook, line and sinker for it. But not only does it give this false impression and expectation of true love, it actively encourages the stereotype of the typical manly male which is also completely unattainable. It's promoted by celebrities who have "perfect" partners (until a few years later) who, for some unknown reason, people are obsessed with and want to be, so will try to be like them.

Burt Renaults wrote: »

I'm wearing a stupid novelty face-mask in one of my Tinder photos and fellating an ice-cream in another. Both pictures fit my stupid personality quite well. They were taken on a crap camera phone during lunch breaks at work. Zero effort. I think (and I could be completely wrong here) that enrolling the assistance of a professional photographer is the second worst thing you can possibly do to an online dating profile (the worst is taking your top off). A big mistake people often make is that they make such an effort to look as attractive as possible that all they're left with is a photo of a person trying to look as attractive as possible.

The best "look" is of someone comfortable in their own skin, doing something they enjoy.

I had all them too. The photographer was a last ditch effort, because no combination of anything worked before that. I just had to give up, it was doing me more harm than good, especially as I had a "friend" who loved to boast about how he could pull. Only thing I ever managed to pull was myself.

B.A._Baracus

YellowLead wrote: »

And y’all think women don’t get judged by men for their looks?

Who gives a sh*t
If it is perfectly acceptable for a woman to judge a man on what type of job he has (how loaded he is) then its perfectly acceptable for a man to judge a woman on her looks. Door swings both ways.

YellowLead wrote: »

The reality is when it comes to dating if it was so tough for men and so easy for women nobody would ever get together.

The apps are hard work for both genders as is dating in general, but people who are positive attract others and that coupled with perseverance and a smattering of wit/charm and being a good person (but not too boring) can go a long way...

I ended up being really attracted to a guy who as shorter than me because he was charming and funny.

It works both ways also...managing expectations...not every guy can date a supermodel.

And not every woman is a supermodel who can date a male supermodel.

Look, I am not ragging on you, but you should open your mind and get experiences from the opposite gender. The experience of men to women on dating sites and apps is insane. Its one side of the spectrum to the other.

YellowLead

B.A._Baracus wrote: »

Who gives a sh*t
If it is perfectly acceptable for a woman to judge a man on what type of job he has (how loaded he is) then its perfectly acceptable for a man to judge a woman on her looks. Door swings both ways.

And not every woman is a supermodel who can date a male supermodel.

Look, I am not ragging on you, but you should open your mind and get experiences from the opposite gender. The experience of men to women on dating sites and apps is insane. Its one side of the spectrum to the other.

I am well aware that there are people - both men and women who judge each other on various things like looks or money. And I don’t care. Each to their own - jeez! But i just felt it important to point out that men judge women too, as there seem to be a lot of men on this thread out to bash women and moaning that they get a hard deal, as if it’s all plain sailing for women.

There are plenty of men for example to be encountered on the apps only looking for a ride. Do I tar all guys with the wrong brush as a result? Nope I just sail on by.

Plenty of nice guys and girls out there to meet, but you won’t meet them with a negative gender sweeping attitude.

jimjangles

YellowLead wrote: »

I am well aware that there are people - both men and women who judge each other on various things like looks or money. And I don’t care. Each to their own - jeez! But i just felt it important to point out that men judge women too, as there seem to be a lot of men on this thread out to bash women and moaning that they get a hard deal, as if it’s all plain sailing for women.

There are plenty of men for example to be encountered on the apps only looking for a ride. Do I tar all guys with the wrong brush as a result? Nope I just sail on by.

Plenty of nice guys and girls out there to meet, but you won’t meet them with a negative gender sweeping attitude.

Yes we all know that but women have impossibly high standards these days making online dating a waste of time unless the man fits all 100+ of their list of requirements.

Rawr

Ah, Plenty of Fish....I remember being on that site and a few others. Luckily my own idiot luck seemed to work better for my love life than practically all of those sites combined.

POF was a interesting one, because I remember registering for it...trying it for a while and then forgetting about it (while leaving the account active). Then suddenly out of the blue about a year or so ago I got a woman on POF actually contact me....be it 10 years since I have emegrated from Ireland...and happily married already to boot. I politely declined the contact, and closed my forgotten POF account.

That's a special kind of useless with Plenty of Fish. You might be better off with another site.

kowloon

completedit wrote: »

It's eugenics masked by 'preferences' and 'you're attracted to what you're attracted to'. We were told we wouldn't be rock stars or musicians but who knew that the caste ****ing system was going to appear again in the west? Average men are the new untouchables. Ugly men - well let's just say there are cockroaches that might have more value in 21st century society.

Things are sort of working then. Surely the point of the mating game is selection. If we were wild animals the males would be tearing chunks out of each other to compete. 90% of us would get nowhere and the top guys, the silverbacks, would be dispensing baby tickets left right and centre.

completedit

kowloon wrote: »

Things are sort of working then. Surely the point of the mating game is selection. If we were wild animals the males would be tearing chunks out of each other to compete. 90% of us would get nowhere and the top guys, the silverbacks, would be dispensing baby tickets left right and centre.

True. Evolutionary, this might be the best thing that ever happened to our species. Weed out those whose genes are not deemed worthy of reproduction.

jimjangles

Good, decent people with a personality and a brain will be
wiped out.
All we'll have are shallow annoying a-holes and braindeads.
Humanity is well and truly fooked.
Anyway let it screw itself up to destruction.
Let the fooktards and fookwits go and fook themselves.
I'll be long dead before it's complete anyway.

Surreptitious

jimjangles wrote: »

Good, decent people with a personality and a brain will be
wiped out.
All we'll have are shallow annoying a-holes and braindeads.
Humanity is well and truly fooked.
Anyway let it screw itself up to destruction.
Let the fooktards and fookwits go and fook themselves.
I'll be long dead before it's complete anyway.

if this is the regular carry on of you, no wonder you can't get a date.

jimjangles

jimjangles wrote: »

Good, decent people with a personality and a brain will be
wiped out.
All we'll have are shallow annoying a-holes and braindeads.
Humanity is well and truly fooked.
Anyway let it screw itself up to destruction.
Let the fooktards and fookwits go and fook themselves.
I'll be long dead before it's complete anyway.

You seem nice.

I would say 60 seconds under normal circumstances, but with all the distractions these days, I'd give it 90 seconds without a response before deleting the pic and profile.