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No Fetal Pole 7 weeks

  • 20-03-2021 10:20am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭


    Hi all, I’m currently 7 + 3 according to LMP, this date is also consistent with the positive ovulation tests I got on day 16 of my cycle. I tested positive on the 24th of February.
    I went for an early ultrasound test as recommended by my GP. I was suffering pretty bad anxiety and fear that something wasn’t right. She thought seeing a HB might reassure me.
    Anyways, the sonographer could see a gestational sack and a yolk sac. No fetal pole or HB. She couldn’t get accurate measurements. She said she reckoned no more than 5 weeks, she said to come back in 7-10 days to be rescanned but said the fact I’m so confident about dates means that it’s likely the pregnancy hasn’t progressed.
    I’m absolutely devastated. Turning to google I’ve read some success stories but am trying not to get any hopes up. I don’t know how I’m going to work and carry on ‘normal’ for the next 7 days.
    Has anyone been in a similar situation?
    Thank you


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,348 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    If you can, take some time off work. There is a lot to process. Everyone is different and every pregnancy is different so no one can give you any insight into your own body. I was about 5.4 weeks pregnant when I had a similar experience but I had had a bleed that landed me in EPU. I miscarried naturally while awaiting the follow up scan, but again, mine was a different situation to yours.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,998 ✭✭✭c.p.w.g.w


    Going through the same thing OP....Well my OH is physically going through it...

    It's been a sh!t week, we are due a scan next week, but it's most likely just to confirm that the pregnancy isn't progressing(Have read lots of stories online where the Dr's were proven wrong, and the pregnancy progressed)...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    c.p.w.g.w wrote: »
    Going through the same thing OP....Well my OH is physically going through it...

    It's been a sh!t week, we are due a scan next week, but it's most likely just to confirm that the pregnancy isn't progressing(Have read lots of stories online where the Dr's were proven wrong, and the pregnancy progressed)...

    I’m really sorry to hear you and your OH are also experiencing this. It’s awful the wait! I have also read positive stories but I’m trying not to get my hopes up too much.
    I wish you both the best of luck with your next scan.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    If you can, take some time off work. There is a lot to process. Everyone is different and every pregnancy is different so no one can give you any insight into your own body. I was about 5.4 weeks pregnant when I had a similar experience but I had had a bleed that landed me in EPU. I miscarried naturally while awaiting the follow up scan, but again, mine was a different situation to yours.

    Yes, the reason I was prompted to go for such an early scan was how different this pregnancy is towards my last, I just had a gut feeling. It’s odd I still have all the normal pregnancy symptoms & +ve tests but I guess it’s just a waiting game.
    Thank you for the advice. I’m sorry your pregnancy ended this was. It’s heartbreaking.
    I came to work today. Still unsure if it was the right decision but it’s a distraction. Will call my GP Monday but I know she can’t do much.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,348 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    YI guess it’s just a waiting game.

    It really is. And despite anything you do now, the outcome will be what it is, either a healthy pregnancy or a loss. The powerlessness is horrible. That is why it is so important to rest and look after yourself for you and your mental health. Again I know my situation was different in that I miscarried but one of the biggest regrets I have is just powering on through that time and not looking after myself. Hindsight is a great thing but use supports if you have them x


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  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    It is just a waiting game unfortunately.I have been very positive on my dates, but yet on my first they told me I was out (I wasn't, I had been using ovulation sticks), I was 8 days behind in measurements all along and they changed my due date at the 20 week scan.I had a 6 week scan on that one too, and back in after 10 days.The stress is unreal. It is incredibly hard to know, but here's hoping it works out well for you
    Edit to say my first is a healthy 6 year old now.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    shesty wrote: »
    It is just a waiting game unfortunately.I have been very positive on my dates, but yet on my first they told me I was out (I wasn't, I had been using ovulation sticks), I was 8 days behind in measurements all along and they changed my due date at the 20 week scan.I had a 6 week scan on that one too, and back in after 10 days.The stress is unreal. It is incredibly hard to know, but here's hoping it works out well for you
    Edit to say my first is a healthy 6 year old now.

    Thank you so much. I’m really pleased to hear that you had a positive outcome.
    I’ve 6 days to wait which feels like an eternity but thankfully my 3 year old will keep me occupied.
    My partner is very positive because at 24 weeks pregnant with our first we went for 2 different opinions because of measurements of the ventricles in our child’s brain. Everything turned out okay and the consultant apologised for the distress caused (old equipment was to blame??) but I feel this is an entirely different scenario.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 54 ✭✭uptheduffagain


    Nothing to add, but hope everything works out for you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Nothing to add, but hope everything works out for you.

    To both Ginny and OP, I am so sorry to hear you're going through this waiting game.

    Ginny, I experienced the same in the past. We had to wait 2 weeks to return for a 2nd scan. As shesty said, the stress is real. I really feel for both you and the OP, and partner (s) of course too upon reading this.

    I'm now currently 6 weeks pregnant and waiting for our early pregnancy scan this Thursday.

    Please, take my one little tuppence worth of advice and take the time off work if at all possible. In the past I didn't. It impacted hugely on my health and day to day for months afterwards in the past. I had just started a new job and was asked would be back in the following day after D&C which I agreed to. The last thing I wish to do is scaremonger, but please think of you. Nows not the time to people please, as we love to do Ireland for thfear of causing offense. I hope this doesn't come across the wrong way.

    Take care of yourself and best of luck over the coming days. As hard as it may be, try and do whatever it takes to distract. The worst part about it is the continued discomforting symptoms you're experiencing. Please God, your next scans will bring good news.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    To both Ginny and OP, I am so sorry to hear you're going through this waiting game.

    Ginny, I experienced the same in the past. We had to wait 2 weeks to return for a 2nd scan. As shesty said, the stress is real. I really feel for both you and the OP, and partner (s) of course too upon reading this.

    I'm now currently 6 weeks pregnant and waiting for our early pregnancy scan this Thursday.

    Please, take my one little tuppence worth of advice and take the time off work if at all possible. In the past I didn't. It impacted hugely on my health and day to day for months afterwards in the past. I had just started a new job and was asked would be back in the following day after D&C which I agreed to. The last thing I wish to do is scaremonger, but please think of you. Nows not the time to people please, as we love to do Ireland for thfear of causing offense. I hope this doesn't come across the wrong way.

    Take care of yourself and best of luck over the coming days. As hard as it may be, try and do whatever it takes to distract. The worst part about it is the continued discomforting symptoms you're experiencing. Please God, your next scans will bring good news.

    Thank you so much for your advice. I appreciate it.
    I’m powering on with work & assignments until the next scan, but I will absolutely take time out should things not work out in our favour. I wouldn’t want to compromise my mental or physical health. Thankfully I work in an place where absence is easily covered and they are fairly considerate.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Thank you so much for your advice. I appreciate it.
    I’m powering on with work & assignments until the next scan, but I will absolutely take time out should things not work out in our favour. I wouldn’t want to compromise my mental or physical health. Thankfully I work in an place where absence is easily covered and they are fairly considerate.


    Good on you Ginny. It helps that you have a considerate Workplace too should you need time off regardless. I'll be thinking of you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,096 ✭✭✭xalot


    Just wanted to say that I went through this in October, I went for a follow up scan a week later and there had been very little growth so the pregnancy wasn't viable. It was so difficult as I had morning sickness and everything, felt like my body was tricking me.

    My consultant explained that sometimes the cells multiply so quickly that they skip chromosomes and so the baby doesn't develop as it should. I found comfort in the fact that it wasn't something I had done wrong and I would much rather go through the loss at 8 weeks than have a very difficult decision at 20 weeks.

    I hope that your dates are just a little off and everything works out for you.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    xalot wrote: »
    Just wanted to say that I went through this in October, I went for a follow up scan a week later and there had been very little growth so the pregnancy wasn't viable. It was so difficult as I had morning sickness and everything, felt like my body was tricking me.

    My consultant explained that sometimes the cells multiply so quickly that they skip chromosomes and so the baby doesn't develop as it should. I found comfort in the fact that it wasn't something I had done wrong and I would much rather go through the loss at 8 weeks than have a very difficult decision at 20 weeks.

    I hope that your dates are just a little off and everything works out for you.

    Sorry to hear about your loss. Yes I agree as devastating as any loss is, I do think the earlier the better.
    Thank you for your support and sharing your experience.
    I appreciate it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,096 ✭✭✭xalot


    Thanks, I got pregnant straight after the D&C and am 17 weeks now so things are looking up.

    Keeping everything crossed for you, I know the wait is torture. If you have any specific queries feel free to private message me. I had a friend who'd been through something similar and her advice was invaluable at the time.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    xalot wrote: »
    Thanks, I got pregnant straight after the D&C and am 17 weeks now so things are looking up.

    Keeping everything crossed for you, I know the wait is torture. If you have any specific queries feel free to private message me. I had a friend who'd been through something similar and her advice was invaluable at the time.

    Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. It’s the loneliest experience because I’ve no friends or family that have experienced it.
    Congratulations, I’m so happy for you 😊 best of luck with the rest of your pregnancy.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    In case anyone in the future reads and is in a similar position.
    I returned today after 8 days and there was a fetal pole and heartbeat of 90bpm. Measuring 5 weeks and 6 days as opposed to 8+4 according to LMP.
    I’m still in limbo for another 2 weeks, because there is a delay in my blood work and it’s impossible to get a GP or nurse appointment. So when I have that and a further scan I was told they could give me a better prognosis.
    According to the new date I’d have gotten pregnant after my positive test.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 188 ✭✭glut22


    This was me last summer. Went for 3 scans in total, embryo died at 6 weeks 6 days when I should have been 11 weeks. Took ten days to grow 3 days between the first and second scan and it had a very slow heart rate. Its such a difficult time esp when its drawn out and you have uncertainty. I got pregnant straight away afterwards though and I'm now 35 weeks pregnant :-) wishing you all the best X


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Missed miscarriage confirmed at 10w+4.
    I just said I’d update because when I was Googling & reading threads I found a lot of them had no follow up.
    I wish the outcome was different.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,845 ✭✭✭Antares35


    Missed miscarriage confirmed at 10w+4.
    I just said I’d update because when I was Googling & reading threads I found a lot of them had no follow up.
    I wish the outcome was different.

    Really sorry to hear that. Hope you are feeling ok.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,348 ✭✭✭Loveinapril


    Missed miscarriage confirmed at 10w+4.
    I just said I’d update because when I was Googling & reading threads I found a lot of them had no follow up.
    I wish the outcome was different.

    I am so sorry to read this but it is very kind of you to update your story to help others in the future. Please mind yourself. Rest and try to not put any pressure on yourself to be or do anything.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 188 ✭✭glut22


    Sorry to hear this. Allow yourself to grieve and time to heal. Know it wasn't anything you did or didn't do. These things are very common unfortunately. Take care X


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Thank you. I appreciate it.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    Aw Ginny.So sorry.Take your time, and please don't blame yourself.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,096 ✭✭✭xalot


    I'm so sorry Ginny, having been through the exact same emotional rollercoster all I can say is be kind to yourself. I'm not sure what kind of management you have planned but I had a D&C during COVID restrictions so feel free to pm me if you have any questions.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 54 ✭✭uptheduffagain


    So sorry to hear this, mind yourself Ginny.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Thanks so much, I really appreciate it. It’s the loneliest feeling in the world. I’m currently waiting on my EPAU to call me back with an appointment. Either way I’m hoping it’ll be medically managed at this point. I’ve exams in 2/3 weeks and I’d like to be somewhat physically recovered, though at this point I’ve no idea how I’m going to face them!
    Thank goodness for forums like these, to have support. Thanks fully I’m the first in my immediate family to experience this and most of my friends haven’t had children yet.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    I think you will be medically managed Ginny, they will probably bring you into hospital for a couple of days at this stage of a pregnancy.I have had a D&C (different circumstance) and it was a short procedure with no problems.Fingers crossed you get sorted out soon with a plan and on the mend.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Ginny, I feel so sad for you reading your posts. Yes, you're entirely right, it sure is an awful lonely, empty and ultimately heartbreaking feeling. A loss is a loss, no matter ho big or small and the effect it has can be heartbreaking.

    The very best of luck with availing of a D&C as well as your exams. Is there any way they can be resat or repeated in the summer!?


    In time, when it feels the right time for you, maybe you can do something something to mark your baby's loss. If you ever need to talk or advice, please PM me. I have experienced at the time when one or two family/ friend members who hadn't yet children. It was very difficult as I felt no one quite understood and one very close friend labelled it "only a missed miscarriage and not a real baby." I've never forgotten it it hence my warrior typing!!! It, along with other awful comments have changed my relationship entirely with the girl to be honest as well. I often wonder was it just being to being misinformed even though it felt like the world was out to get me at my most vulnerable point in life. The point I'm trying to make is, it can be extremely difficult to comprehend somebody's loss if one hasn't personally experienced it, however that does not excuse the impact behaviours or comments about it to you may be delivered. I'm not saying this will happen at all - and I hope it doesn't and that you have supportive and compassionate family and friends - but just a little heads up that you are entitled to feel enraged/angry and peed off at - it's all part of grief - and you're not going mad.


    If you ever need to chat please PM me. In time, I hope you can mark your babies loss somehow, should that be something you would like to do. Take care of yourself for now and remember now is the time to think of number one. Don't be a marytr. Look after yourself.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Ginny, I feel so sad for you reading your posts. Yes, you're entirely right, it sure is an awful lonely, empty and ultimately heartbreaking feeling. A loss is a loss, no matter ho big or small and the effect it has can be heartbreaking.

    The very best of luck with availing of a D&C as well as your exams. Is there any way they can be resat or repeated in the summer!?


    In time, when it feels the right time for you, maybe you can do something something to mark your baby's loss. If you ever need to talk or advice, please PM me. I have experienced at the time when one or two family/ friend members who hadn't yet children. It was very difficult as I felt no one quite understood and one very close friend labelled it "only a missed miscarriage and not a real baby." I've never forgotten it it hence my warrior typing!!! It, along with other awful comments have changed my relationship entirely with the girl to be honest as well. I often wonder was it just being to being misinformed even though it felt like the world was out to get me at my most vulnerable point in life. The point I'm trying to make is, it can be extremely difficult to comprehend somebody's loss if one hasn't personally experienced it, however that does not excuse the impact behaviours or comments about it to you may be delivered. I'm not saying this will happen at all - and I hope it doesn't and that you have supportive and compassionate family and friends - but just a little heads up that you are entitled to feel enraged/angry and peed off at - it's all part of grief - and you're not going mad.


    If you ever need to chat please PM me. In time, I hope you can mark your babies loss somehow, should that be something you would like to do. Take care of yourself for now and remember now is the time to think of number one. Don't be a marytr. Look after yourself.
    Thank you so much. I mean that so much.
    My appointment went okay yesterday. The midwives in the EPUs are saints. They want me to wait another week before intervention, she thinks from the scan it could be imminent. Regardless I’ve to return next week. They have assured me the choice will be mine with regards to a D&C or tablets. I’d say I came across as the coldest person they have met. I genuinely feel numb. I can’t cry anymore, and I absolutely feel angry. At myself, at people making comments, at people avoiding me, at my doctor who told me not to worry!! All natural of course!
    I also rang my GP to get signed off work for the week! She’s on leave so they want me to do a phone consultation with a locum doctor which I see as a waste of time. Yes I’ve lots of questions but I’m pretty sure most can’t be answered.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Thank you so much. I mean that so much.
    My appointment went okay yesterday. The midwives in the EPUs are saints. They want me to wait another week before intervention, she thinks from the scan it could be imminent. Regardless I’ve to return next week. They have assured me the choice will be mine with regards to a D&C or tablets. I’d say I came across as the coldest person they have met. I genuinely feel numb. I can’t cry anymore, and I absolutely feel angry. At myself, at people making comments, at people avoiding me, at my doctor who told me not to worry!! All natural of course!
    I also rang my GP to get signed off work for the week! She’s on leave so they want me to do a phone consultation with a locum doctor which I see as a waste of time. Yes I’ve lots of questions but I’m pretty sure most can’t be answered.

    Oh Ginny your poor thing. This is such an unfair and well, horrible situation to be in. Good on you for taking the plunge in taking time off work for the week. A locum doctor, not at all what you need right now. Familiarity and your own doctor who knows you and your history would be far more ideal. Unfortunate.

    I'm so glad your experience with the EPU midwives was positive and that you were met by warmth and compassion by the sounds of it. Best of luck with your decision between D&C or tablets. When I had my D&C, from recollection I was given tablets and some time later taken for D&C. Maybe both options have pros and cons from an emotional point of view, however, I'm not sure which is medically the best etc. Are you swaying towards either choice at all?


    It's natural to feel angry. Allow it. Vent it. Do what you need. Do not feel guilty and block out/ ignore those who may have nothing good to contribute right now. Your doctor's comment was a little... thoughtless. Wrap yourself up in a blanket with something comforting x


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,845 ✭✭✭Antares35


    Hi Ginny

    Hope you are doing ok. I had a missed MC a little over two years ago. The baby had passed away at 7 weeks but it was only when I went for a 10 week scan that I found out. She (I always felt in my heart that my first baby was a girl), had stopped growing. I attended the rotunda. They sent me home for the MC to happen naturally. I don't know if they gave me a choice. I don't recall it but it's all a bit hazy. Anyway I just wanted to let you know that if you have any questions about the natural MC as opposed to medical management, you can pm me and I will be happy to share my experience if it helps you to know what to maybe expect. Entirely up to you of course just putting it out there. I'm really sorry again.

    I remember an aunt afterwards when we were discussing it, she kept insisting on refering to it "the loss of the fetus". I snapped at her because for is it's a baby from day one, and I hate that sort of cold terminology people use when someone has suffered a loss. I'm still annoyed with her about it to this day!

    Edit just to say I wasn't advocating for natural MC, just in case it happens in the interim.


  • Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,914 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    Ginny, those midwives deal with everything.They see and hear everything.I mean the full gamut of human emotion, there is very little they haven't seen before.They see women, physically, and their relationships, at their weakest and at their strongest.Don't worry about how you are coming across to them. Everyone reacts differently.You could be crying on their shoulders next time so just roll with that, do what you have to.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Antares35 wrote: »
    Hi Ginny

    Hope you are doing ok. I had a missed MC a little over two years ago. The baby had passed away at 7 weeks but it was only when I went for a 10 week scan that I found out. She (I always felt in my heart that my first baby was a girl), had stopped growing. I attended the rotunda. They sent me home for the MC to happen naturally. I don't know if they gave me a choice. I don't recall it but it's all a bit hazy. Anyway I just wanted to let you know that if you have any questions about the natural MC as opposed to medical management, you can pm me and I will be happy to share my experience if it helps you to know what to maybe expect. Entirely up to you of course just putting it out there. I'm really sorry again.

    I remember an aunt afterwards when we were discussing it, she kept insisting on refering to it "the loss of the fetus". I snapped at her because for is it's a baby from day one, and I hate that sort of cold terminology people use when someone has suffered a loss. I'm still annoyed with her about it to this day!

    Edit just to say I wasn't advocating for natural MC, just in case it happens in the interim.


    Omg Antares, it's so frustrating you had to experience this. A loss is a loss. I wish we could break free of this cultural taboo. The whole reason it is taboo and not discussed is because those on the receiving end of the conversation are in fact the weak ones but sadly it's sometimes made out to the other way around. I remember how someone in my immediate family came home a few days after my D&C happily announcing and discussing how our cousin had just had a baby and included all the details in the conversation. I remember feeling a mix of anger and sadness but beneath it all was hurt. I walked out of the room as to not become angry in the setting and was called out on being selfish and making it all about me. Yep,strange times.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Thank you. Strangely enough yesterday evening I thought it was starting naturally. I was cramping quite badly and spotting, but today nothing except dull aching cramps. Maybe its just the effects of 3 internal scans in 3 days. Who knows! I'm still in the pits of anger with body, firstly for failing to grow this little one, and also for not acknowledging that the little heart has stopped.
    Personally I'd be happier for a natural end, but I've also an almost 4 year old who follows me around most of the day, I can't get my partner to stay off work, I think his students have suffered enough this year.

    I can't believe the comments regarding these early losses, quite thoughtless! I've had 'aren't you lucky its now and not in 6 months', and the everything happens for a reason speil!! I know the statistics, I know that its probably most likely chromosomal, I'm a scientific minded person and have read numerous papers on first trimester loss. But none of that makes me feel any better, it is devastating.

    I watched the Síle Seoige's documentary over the weekend on TG4, really recommend it. I hope people start to talk more.

    Also my phone call from the locum GP was just a formality to allow them to issue a medical cert. I had so many questions which I will ask next week in the hospital. Do any of you recommend actually seeing a GP afterwards? I have questions about trying again (not sure when) and just general mental health queries. I don't visit the doctor too often but do have a GP I feel I can speak to, its just difficult to get an appointment and I don't want to feel like I'm wasting resources.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 76 ✭✭Bambinoonboard


    Thank you. Strangely enough yesterday evening I thought it was starting naturally. I was cramping quite badly and spotting, but today nothing except dull aching cramps. Maybe its just the effects of 3 internal scans in 3 days. Who knows! I'm still in the pits of anger with body, firstly for failing to grow this little one, and also for not acknowledging that the little heart has stopped.
    Personally I'd be happier for a natural end, but I've also an almost 4 year old who follows me around most of the day, I can't get my partner to stay off work, I think his students have suffered enough this year.

    I can't believe the comments regarding these early losses, quite thoughtless! I've had 'aren't you lucky its now and not in 6 months', and the everything happens for a reason speil!! I know the statistics, I know that its probably most likely chromosomal, I'm a scientific minded person and have read numerous papers on first trimester loss. But none of that makes me feel any better, it is devastating.

    I watched the Síle Seoige's documentary over the weekend on TG4, really recommend it. I hope people start to talk more.

    Also my phone call from the locum GP was just a formality to allow them to issue a medical cert. I had so many questions which I will ask next week in the hospital. Do any of you recommend actually seeing a GP afterwards? I have questions about trying again (not sure when) and just general mental health queries. I don't visit the doctor too often but do have a GP I feel I can speak to, its just difficult to get an appointment and I don't want to feel like I'm wasting resources.


    Hi Ginny,

    Of course you are in the pits of anger and you have every right to. It's an unfair and painful experience. The mental pain is of course far greater than the physical.

    Those comments are also thoughtless and would make bloody boil. Oh the "whatever happens, happens for a reason" craic - that's a familiar one!! Shocking.

    Good on you been so informed on the scientific reasons etc. Yes, it probably is chromosomal.

    Síle Seoige's doc - I meant to watch it myself. Thanks for the recommendation.

    If you have questions and concerns re trying again and mental health, I certainly don't see that as wasted resource at all. Make the appointment if it feels right for you. x


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    Hi Ginny,

    Of course you are in the pits of anger and you have every right to. It's an unfair and painful experience. The mental pain is of course far greater than the physical.

    Those comments are also thoughtless and would make bloody boil. Oh the "whatever happens, happens for a reason" craic - that's a familiar one!! Shocking.

    Good on you been so informed on the scientific reasons etc. Yes, it probably is chromosomal.

    Síle Seoige's doc - I meant to watch it myself. Thanks for the recommendation.

    If you have questions and concerns re trying again and mental health, I certainly don't see that as wasted resource at all. Make the appointment if it feels right for you. x

    I finally miscarried at 12+1. Medically managed, decided against surgical management. It was just easier to get it done with ASAP. Should I be unlucky to be in the same situation again I will opt for the ERPC. The miso pills are awful. I read a lot and tried to prepare, but nothing could have prepared me. I felt like I was consciously ending my own pregnancy (ridiculous, I know). I just hope my follow up scan shows that it’s completed.

    I visited my GP, she was fantastic and a wealth of knowledge. She really took the time to let me get it all off my chest.

    Thank you so much to everyone on this thread, it’s been a much lengthier experience than I expected but this has provided great support.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,845 ✭✭✭Antares35


    I finally miscarried at 12+1. Medically managed, decided against surgical management. It was just easier to get it done with ASAP. Should I be unlucky to be in the same situation again I will opt for the ERPC. The miso pills are awful. I read a lot and tried to prepare, but nothing could have prepared me. I felt like I was consciously ending my own pregnancy (ridiculous, I know). I just hope my follow up scan shows that it’s completed.

    I visited my GP, she was fantastic and a wealth of knowledge. She really took the time to let me get it all off my chest.

    Thank you so much to everyone on this thread, it’s been a much lengthier experience than I expected but this has provided great support.

    It isn't an easy thing. Hope you are doing ok and take the time to recover. X


  • Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,446 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    So sorry for your loss.

    I had a similar experience to you. Missed miscarriage at 10 weeks. Development had stopped around the 6 week mark. Very cruel thing to have happen. I was convinced my baby was growing. I was looking up the measurements each week of what size s/he was.

    Worst feeling of helplessness in the world when your given that awful news. And the waiting for scans and clarification feels endless :(

    Took me a long long time to feel 'normal' again. Going back to work was torture. I remember many days of fighting back tears until lunch time and then driving away to cry in peace. That was after a week off to recover from the initial shock and pain.

    Don't try to rush yourself. You are grieving a deep loss. Give yourself time and be kind to yourself.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 61 ✭✭xXx-Ginny-xXx


    xzanti wrote: »
    So sorry for your loss.

    I had a similar experience to you. Missed miscarriage at 10 weeks. Development had stopped around the 6 week mark. Very cruel thing to have happen. I was convinced my baby was growing. I was looking up the measurements each week of what size s/he was.

    Worst feeling of helplessness in the world when your given that awful news. And the waiting for scans and clarification feels endless :(

    Took me a long long time to feel 'normal' again. Going back to work was torture. I remember many days of fighting back tears until lunch time and then driving away to cry in peace. That was after a week off to recover from the initial shock and pain.

    Don't try to rush yourself. You are grieving a deep loss. Give yourself time and be kind to yourself.

    Thank you for your kind message. I'm also sorry to hear you also experienced a loss. It's utterly devastating.
    Yes I was expecting to be fine but I'm absolutely not, I retuned to work this week and it has been quite turbulent. Physically I'm doing okay but I'm still navigating my way through the mental pain.

    It is so reassuring to know I'm not the only one who struggled post miscarriage. I assumed I'd want to try straight away but I think my mental health is my priority. I'm blessed with a child already and maybe thats our family complete. Who knows :)


  • Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,446 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    Thank you for your kind message. I'm also sorry to hear you also experienced a loss. It's utterly devastating.
    Yes I was expecting to be fine but I'm absolutely not, I retuned to work this week and it has been quite turbulent. Physically I'm doing okay but I'm still navigating my way through the mental pain.

    It is so reassuring to know I'm not the only one who struggled post miscarriage. I assumed I'd want to try straight away but I think my mental health is my priority. I'm blessed with a child already and maybe thats our family complete. Who knows :)

    Thank you. My missed miscarriage was my first pregnancy experience and honestly I felt every month of what should have been my continued pregnancy.

    I still looked at the ticker online, and what stage they would have been at. I'm not sure if that was the 'right' thing for me to do, but I felt compelled to do it as part of my grief and healing.

    I went on to have 2 healthy sons. But I still often think about my little bean and who they might have been.

    Mother nature can be very cruel.

    Wishing you all the best with your healing. Take each day as it comes.


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