What’s the most pissed you’ve ever got?

CBear1993

Just a few instances I’m not proud of:

Went to school formal (debs as ye call It down here)
Mid 70s Granny happened to be staying over that night - came home and sleepwalked/blind drunk walked into the spare room she was staying in and preceded to empty the contents of my bladder with my lad on show all over the carpet at the side of the bed. Mother informed me about a week later, of which I was oblivious to, needless to say it’s never been brought up in conversation.

Another involved a stag in Barcelona ...

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

CBear1993 wrote: »

Just a few instances I’m not proud of:

Went to school formal (debs as ye call It down here)
Mid 70s Granny happened to be staying over that night - came home and sleepwalked/blind drunk walked into the spare room she was staying in and preceded to empty the contents of my bladder with my lad on show all over the carpet at the side of the bed. Mother informed me about a week later, of which I was oblivious to, needless to say it’s never been brought up in conversation.

Another involved a stag in Barcelona ...

You were in your mid 70s, Granny was in her mid 70s or it happened in the mid 1970s...?

CBear1993

All of the above.

PTH2009

Too pissed for my own good

Sometime last year passed out on the ground with the guards bringing me home. Drank a **** load through the night. Scary experience that it's so easy to get into that state Everyone has there limit, its different for everyone. Know your limit dont go over it

Xmas time is a tough time in that regard because of the festive spirit all over the place and the general hyper attitude with Drink very much playing it's part

Remember had a jug or 2 of peroni and had a guest back to the house. Felt sick during and you can picture what happend haha

simongurnick

Once gave my mother directions to her own house. I thought I was in a cab.

Better Than Christ

fleet_admiral

Too many to mention but most recent was new years eve. Finished work at 9 and started drinking, fast. (I work in a pub). Left the pub at half 11 to go home and bring in the new year with the wife.
We got a late licence in the pub so I went back down at 1 after drinking 90% of a litre of gin with barely any tonic between half 11 and then. Gin hit me the second I got back to work.
I was in bits. Manager said in the donkeys years he's known me he had never seen me so bad. I still managed a few more pints of Guinness.
Funderland with the kids on new years day was fun...

Quantum Erasure

I can't remember.

freshpopcorn

I found my double one night in a club. He was an absolute twat tough and wouldn't speak to me. I told people about it and I think I realised sometime later I was looking in a mirror.

ILoveYourVibes

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I found my double one night I'm a club. He was an absolute twat tough and wouldn't speak to me. I told people about it and I think I realised sometime later I was looking in a mirror.

Cept this is a famous joke.

Dr. Steve Brule

Years ago, woke up once after a night out & needed to use the bathroom. Had spent a good part of that night on vodka & red bull, so along with tiredness after the working week, I was pretty wasted. Got up, took a couple of steps & I ended up on the floor with a broken nose & blood all over my face. It became very confusing because the bang woke others in the house who came to check on me, thankfully.

Doesn't sound too odd & everyone thought I had just tripped & hit my head on something, only I realised what had happened a few days later, as I started getting my memory back. I had gotten up ON the bed & started walking on it. My third step, there was nothing under me & straight down into the floor I went. I couldn't believe I had managed to do something so stupid.

I Remembered laughing because the floor had felt really bouncy when I took the few steps. It's funny to think back on it now but I could have seriously hurt myself, especially with a knock to the head. I've never drank the stuff since, nor allowed myself to get into such a state again, with any type of alcohol.

2ndcoming

Hospital, near death.

Nothing to be proud of, I still love a drink but anyone glamourising it or showing it a lack of respect can fúck right off.

I'm sure I'm not the only one in this country who's learned a lot of lessons the hard way off the back of the jar.

Arghus

2ndcoming wrote: »

Hospital, near death.

Nothing to be proud of, I still love a drink but anyone glamourising it or showing it a lack of respect can fúck right off.

I'm sure I'm not the only one in this country who's learned a lot of lessons the hard way off the back of the jar.

It great to have good drinking stories and I love a good night on the beer, but I always try to stay on the right side of it.

But a few times down through the years I crossed over into the blackness. And there's really nothing fun about it. Dangerously drunk for me is to be totally out of it, followed by unconsciousness, with a vague memory of maybe somebody turning me over so I don't choke on my own vomit. Followed by the worse mental and physical horrors possible for a day - or two - afterwards. It's about as unglamorous as it gets. It's sordid.

Some people get like that on a regular basis, which I can't understand.

kowloon

I chased a gang of what's considered a rough ethnic background according to a friend. I woke up with a black eye, the arse torn out of my jeans and an insanely bad hangover that took days to recover from. 5/7 would do it again.

JupiterKid

Well, given that I’m a recovering alcoholic, as the old Harry Moore advert goes, more times than I care to remember...

So a complete catalogue of some crazy shenanigans, often whilst blacked out.
One particularly bad incident was ending waking up on a railway line at about 4.30am after leaving a party at an old college friend’s house.

JupiterKid

simongurnick wrote: »

Once gave my mother directions to her own house. I thought I was in a cab.

Yup, did that too. But it was my then partner driving the car, picking me up from a night club in town, circa 2004.

MOR316

First time I went out, instead of walking home, I walked the opposite way. Couldnt understand why I couldn't find my house. Lucky a taxi man brought me home. Left the club at closing time, which was 3am I believe and didn't get home until near 8am

There have been a few others in between. Nothing major. Punch ups, getting kicked out etc

Few days ago, drank all day. Ended up going through two bottles of whiskey. Very unlike me but, I'm in a bad mental place at the moment. I'm reminded of an incident that happened years ago. Scarred me mentally for life, still affects me to this day. Plus, there's one or two other things. In a bad place but, I'm hopeful that with me trying to change things for the better, that perhaps someday, things will turn around for me.

Still hanging from it. Would never recommend it to anyone

Cookie_Monster

6 beers each, 1 litre of 55% vodka and two cans of club lemon between 2 of us. beers in my house watching a film, back to mates house to grab the mixers for the vodka (believing he had way more)
*scene missing*
remember leaving his house and firing the empty bottle of vodka across the road for some reason
*scene missing*
Woke up on my porch, head and hands covered in blood

Don't remember the rest, my brother apparently dragged me into the house and bed, next day was spent mostly being sick and all the usual hangover awfulness.
Still have a scar under my eyebrow from it and no idea what so ever what happened on the way home, still ahd wallet, phone and keys though.

fran38

Two episodes im not proud about:

I was drinking in the pub where the Munster team were due to come back to after winning the European Cup 2009. Anyway bar woman wouldnt serve me coz i was fairly tanked. Proceeded to give her my invaluable insights on bar person etiquette. Was promptly shown the door by a bouncer. Im standing outside with hundreds of Munster fans and i saw yer wan having a smoke. Over I went and gave her a piece of my mind but some guy pulled me away from her hurtling me to the ground, hit my head on the kerb. Blood oozing everywhere. The Munster team bus pulls up, everyone gets off including the team doctor who comes to my aid until the paramedics arrive. Not proud of myself of course.

Im staying over in a good friends house while i go on the tear. Arrive back at 3am, fall out of the cab, crawl some distance to her house and spent 10 minutes trying to regain my balance at the door. Woke up 7am where ive just pissef myself and drownded the bed. Ye should have been in the kitchen that morning when i arrived down to stick the bedclothes in the washer and her sitting there having her breakfast. Horrible memories.

Sgt Hartman

6 cans of Dutch Gold, 2 shots of Sheridan's Liqueur and a half bottle of Paddy Whiskey at a 21st birthday party when I was in college in 1999.

I remember entering the sitting room after coming from the bathroom. The next moment all I can remember is people from the party trying to pick me up off the floor with me not having the faintest idea how I got there.

Luckily one of my college friends took me home all the way from Caherdavin in Limerick to my home in Southill in a cab. I can remember climbing up the stairs on my hands and knees saying "please don't tell Dad" to my mother before waking up at 2PM the next day with an evil hangover. It was 15 years before I let another drop of whiskey touch my lips again after that incident

Thelonious Monk

Too many times. I always found the worst ones to be where you have extremely vague memories of something awful having happened, but you can't quite remember it. Scary. I haven't got like that in a few years thankfully, but still had been drinking too much lately. 9 days clean now and looking after myself, it feels good.

The Tetrarch

At an office do there was a free bar in a function room in a hotel.
The spirits bottles were lined up in a row on a table.
I started on the left working to the right, and for an unknown reason wrote down what I ordered each time on a small piece of paper.
Later when the function ended we went downstairs to the bar for a few beers.
Next day I found the piece of paper with 15 shorts listed, mostly scotch, all different.

Many years ago in Africa I went with two friends to visit geologists. It was a bank holiday weekend, four days.
The five of us went driving during the day sightseeing, made a fire, cooked food, and had a few beers.
Back at camp that evening we drank 95 beers (only 2/3 pint each), and half a bottle of cane spirits.
My bed was an inflated lilo in a hut with a concrete floor and woven walls and roof.
At the end of the evening I think I knocked myself out by falling on the inflated lilo, only it was no longer inflated.

Marty Xavier

Vague memories of my girlfriend asking the police for a lift home to get away from me. Decided then I needed to have a look at myself.

Homelander

Even thinking about my worst times makes the fear strike hard, and they were well over a decade ago. Gardai shaking me awake on a bench. Cheating on girlfriends. Ending up 30KM from home with no memory of how I got there. Getting into fights that the person did absolutely nothing to warrant.

I like these threads though, sometimes it's reassuring to remember that most of us have been to those bad places many times.

It's one of the things I love about getting older - no matter how trashed you get, there's usually a point now where I'm just thinking "OK, you've had enough - go to bed before you embarrass yourself".

That safety-switch just didn't exist in my 20's.

yosser hughes

fran38 wrote: »

Two episodes im not proud about:

I was drinking in the pub where the Munster team were due to come back to after winning the European Cup 2009. .

You must have been fairly drunk alright, Leinster won it that year.:D

gifted

Way too many .....not proud of a lot of things I've said and done but very lucky that when I got into my mid thirties I finally got sense to realise that me and too much drink do not agree......have a few pints once or twice a year with the neighbours and that does me.......

alchemist33

I don't drink, but occasionally have a sip of something to see what it tastes like. At our college graduation do I agreed to have half a glass of wine. I discovered later that friends, and one lecturer had been refilling my glass when I wasn't looking. Afterwards I refused to get in a taxi home because for some reason I wanted to walk,and when I got home I spent half an hour out the back staring up into drizzle, wondering about life.

Needless to say, I haven't attempted even half a unit since.

fran38

yosser hughes wrote: »

You must have been fairly drunk alright, Leinster won it that year.:D

Sorry 2006

corner of hells

CBear1993 wrote: »

Just a few instances I’m not proud of:

Went to school formal (debs as ye call It down here)
Mid 70s Granny happened to be staying over that night - came home and sleepwalked/blind drunk walked into the spare room she was staying in and preceded to empty the contents of my bladder with my lad on show all over the carpet at the side of the bed. Mother informed me about a week later, of which I was oblivious to, needless to say it’s never been brought up in conversation.

Another involved a stag in Barcelona ...

Did the stags antlers not wreck your ball bag?

Feisar

College, I was 17. Myself an another lad drank a bottle of Bacardi and a bottle of Black and White between us. Why? Who the feck knows, seemed like a good idea at the time. I remember him offering me the last drop of whisky, I put my head back to nod and as it came forward i followed through and fell from the couch onto the floor and copious amounts of vomit started pouring out of me. We puked our way to the back door and puked some more there. I crawled on my hands and knees to a garden bench puking as I went. Managed to struggle up into the sitting position and spent hours there, puking intermittently. (My mate in similar condition had passed out in the house). I sort of make myself fall off the bench, into my puke and belly crawled back through river of said puke back into the house. I'll never forget at one stage thinking to myself, this isn't exactly your finest hour.

the beer revolu

alchemist33 wrote: »

I don't drink, but occasionally have a sip of something to see what it tastes like. At our college graduation do I agreed to have half a glass of wine. I discovered later that friends, and one lecturer had been refilling my glass when I wasn't looking. Afterwards I refused to get in a taxi home because for some reason I wanted to walk,and when I got home I spent half an hour out the back staring up into drizzle, wondering about life.

Needless to say, I haven't attempted even half a unit since.

That's assault, dangerous and not even a little bit funny.
Lecturer could have lost his/her job for that stunt.

muddle84

fran38 wrote: »

Two episodes im not proud about:

I was drinking in the pub where the Munster team were due to come back to after winning the European Cup 2009. Anyway bar woman wouldnt serve me coz i was fairly tanked. Proceeded to give her my invaluable insights on bar person etiquette. Was promptly shown the door by a bouncer. Im standing outside with hundreds of Munster fans and i saw yer wan having a smoke. Over I went and gave her a piece of my mind but some guy pulled me away from her hurtling me to the ground, hit my head on the kerb. Blood oozing everywhere. The Munster team bus pulls up, everyone gets off including the team doctor who comes to my aid until the paramedics arrive. Not proud of myself of course.

Im staying over in a good friends house while i go on the tear. Arrive back at 3am, fall out of the cab, crawl some distance to her house and spent 10 minutes trying to regain my balance at the door. Woke up 7am where ive just pissef myself and drownded the bed. Ye should have been in the kitchen that morning when i arrived down to stick the bedclothes in the washer and her sitting there having her breakfast. Horrible memories.

He sh!t's himself in the movie not piss, get it right :P

suicide_circus

Sgt Hartman wrote: »

6 cans of Dutch Gold, 2 shots of Sheridan's Liqueur and a half bottle of Paddy Whiskey at a 21st birthday party when I was in college in 1999.

I remember entering the sitting room after coming from the bathroom. The next moment all I can remember is people from the party trying to pick me up off the floor with me not having the faintest idea how I got there.

Luckily one of my college friends took me home all the way from Caherdavin in Limerick to my home in Southill in a cab. I can remember climbing up the stairs on my hands and knees saying "please don't tell Dad" to my mother before waking up at 2PM the next day with an evil hangover. It was 15 years before I let another drop of whiskey touch my lips again after that incident

It was the Sheridan's that put you over the edge, not the innocent whiskey

alchemist33

the beer revolu wrote: »

That's assault, dangerous and not even a little bit funny.
Lecturer could have lost his/her job for that stunt.

True enough. Fortunately I didn't have too much in the end, but enough to tell me drinking might be a bad idea for me

greenspurs

Got into bed, stark naked with the Mother in Law & Father in law after a serious St Patricks day of boozing !!

Jaysus…….

the beer revolu

greenspurs wrote: »

Got into bed, stark naked with the Mother & Father in law after a serious St Patricks day of boozing !!

Jaysus…….

What was your mother doing in bed with your father-in-law???:eek:

Pauliedragon

greenspurs wrote: »

Got into bed, stark naked with the Mother & Father in law after a serious St Patricks day of boozing !!

Jaysus…….

That must have been an akward threesome. Was the MIL a decent ride?
.

greenspurs

Pauliedragon wrote: »

That must have been an akward threesome. Was the MIL a decent ride?
.

*awkward


I was so pissed , even your mother couldn't have got it hard ……………………..

TomSweeney

Reading through this I am so happy smartphones weren't a thing when I was young and getting pissed , think of all this crap being videod and uploaded to SM nowadays.

Blaze420

Pissed in plenty of wardrobes, suitcases, shoes and on carpets in my time Been arrested twice, once for arguing with gardai outside a club till they had no choice and the 2nd time when I punched a guy through the window of a florists (he deserved it and I don’t regret it at all). Worst ever was my 18th, woke up covered in my own vomit laying on my side in the bed - still gives me shivers to think what would have happened if I had been on my back that night. Nowadays much more sensible, I’ll still get pissed but I know when it’s time to call it a night and not do another 4-6 shots on top of it.

DellyBelly

Woke up one morning and had no idea how I got home until I saw my car parked outside the driveway. I must have driven it home but for the life of me I can't remember doing it. Pretty scary actually but at least I got home safely...don't think I have ever been so drunk..

vandriver

I once got in a taxi in town going back to Blackrock as drunk as a Lord,and couldn't tell the driver where I lived.
He looked back at me and said'I know where you live'.

Seamai

I was never what you'd call a hard drinker and in the last few years barely drink at all, however about 20 years ago myself and my partner were in Barcelona on holidays and met up with friends for dinner and went on unmercyful bender, you name it, we drank it, finishing up with absinthe at 5am, I still don't know how we managed to find the way back to our apartment but shortly after we did, I wasn't feeling too good, I've always had an irrational fear of vomiting even when I know it is probably the best option but anyway I got it into my head that having a bath would make me feel better.
The next thing I know I'm sitting waist deep in bath water and vomit, I think it was about 3 days before I was right. My partner who drank as much as me was no where near as bad but put in down to the octopus he bad eaten the night before.

Aglomerado

Got pissed on Cava at a new year celebration in Marbella, lost consciousness in Plaza de Naranja and woke up in the apartment next morning not knowing how I got back (friend had propped me up until we could get a taxi). I was missing a quarter of one of my front teeth and had to go to an emergency dentist....

L1011

I woke up in a different country.


It was actually two days later and after the initial "what the actual **** am I doing in Prestwick Airport?" moment most of the weekend came back to me. I'd agreed to go to a gig in Glasgow when at a gaff party after a Friday night out (with a pile of Glaswegians who were going home the next day anyway in attendance), flew there on the Saturday morning flight, went to the gig on Saturday night and was driven to the airport by one of the Glaswegians girlfriends. Apparently I'd actually been fine the entire way through until the camels back was broken with Buckfast *after* the gig in Glasgow and I conked out.

That I was entirely intact, with a charged phone and a present but financially depleted wallet; wearing new clothes - I clearly didn't bring two changes of clothes with me to a gaff party so just bought more in Glasgow - and a new backpack for the other clothes just added to the initial "what the actual ****" thing.


I think there's a Celine Dion song about the ten minutes I spent remembering it all while having some grub.

I was 19 at the time, so the hangover was surprisingly fine even flying back on a prop plane.

Seamai

L1011 wrote: »

I think there's a Celine Dion song about the ten minutes I spent remembering it all while having some grub.

"It's all coming back to me now" ?

Mr. CooL ICE

About 15 years ago, I drank a bottle of wine before the pub. Didn't even last one pint before I had to get sick in the bathroom. Friend, who also downed a bottle of wine, decided to walk me home.

On the street near the pub, I vaguely recall being barely able to stand and my friend constantly pushing me onto parked cars and laughing. I rang him the next day about how drunk we both were and how much of an asshole he was for pushing me, etc. We both laughed and then forgot about it all.

Cue more recently, I was reminiscing about that night with another friend who was present, but much more sober than me. Apparently, my friend wasn't pushing me into cars. I was trying to break into cars to go for a nap and my friend kept stopping me. For years, I thought he was just an asshole but instead, he prevented me from becoming a criminal.

AndyBoBandy

As we were all into DJing, our shed was converted into a studio (My dad being a radio DJ years ago actually built it as a studio, so it was relatively sound proofed). Anyway after a long session in the shed, me on the decks for about 4-5 hours, drank about half a litre bottle of whiskey. When your playing the decks, and 'in the zone', you don't really feel the alcohol creeping up on you, but anyway when the session ended, and everyone went home, as I was locking up the shed I started feeling really drunk. I went inside and curled up in a ball on the floor of the downstairs toilet for about 2 hours waiting to either die or get very sick, it ended up being the latter, but I don't think I've ever seen as drunk in my life!!

Hoop66

I was talking with a couple of mates about this the other night.

First mate said "I was so drunk I pissed the bed, wife was not pleased". Second mate said "That's nothing, I was so langered the other night I actually shat in my bed".

I said "I was so pissed last week I came home and blew chunks".

The two lads weren't that impressed, "that's not so bad" they said.

I replied "No, you misunderstand, Chunks is my dog".

castletownman

chrissb8

I got so drunk in a friends house one night on cocktails I was taken to hospital. I was taken home by friends in their car and started having mad delusions I was spider-man (I was reading a load of comics at the time).

Once home my parents put me in the car and took me to the hospital. Except I jumped out of the car at a roundabout (it was 4am on a Sunday morning thankfully so virtually no traffic). Proceeded to run into the trees beside the roundabout and hide in there until the gardai were called to come and get me. I was rugby tackled down once emerging from the trees sprinting.

Put in a cell for the night and when I woke up I was asked what's my name and in possibly the most humbling moment of my life said "It isn't Peter Parker anyway". The gardai were bursting their hole laughing. In fact, a month later when I had to go in for some follow-up thing in the gardai station they could barely not laugh reading the report. I got no charges or anything, just a caution. Anyway, after the gardai station, I finally went to the hospital for a check-up to see what was going on and they didn't really get an answer and just said I probably just had a bit of an episode (nothing has ever happened like it again).

I vomited the whole day the next day, lived in fear of contacting anyone and spent the next 5 years convincing my parents it wasn't a cocaine induced psychosis.