Deal breakers and turn-off's in dating!

Assetbacked

CrankyHaus wrote: »

Or simply refuse to be treated with disrespect.

I would respond and call him a waste of time then delete and block him. Going out of my way to find him on Facebook, look for relatives and then threaten to send (with the possibility to actually send) the photo to them is a bit loony for me.

Feisar

Assetbacked wrote: »

That female friend must have some serious men hang ups.

While dick pics are lowest common denominator males, the women who get vindictive about them betray something not quite right with themselves.

Yea however it seems to be very common, something not quite right with lads who send them either.

Assetbacked

Feisar wrote: »

Yea however it seems to be very common, something not quite right with lads who send them either.

Yes, of course. I would expect lads to be blocked and ridiculed for sending them.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Assetbacked wrote: »

That female friend must have some serious men hang ups.

While dick pics are lowest common denominator males, the women who get vindictive about them betray something not quite right with themselves.

Why? It's an unsolicited picture of your genitals, if you did it on the street you'd be arrested. As I say I don't think she's ever followed through, but if it gives them a bit of cop on then I don't see the harm.

If they were solicited nudes then it'd be vindictive to post them anywhere or to anyone. But if you send a picture of your dick to someone who doesn't want to see it you can't get too fcuking high horsey about that ending up with it being seen by people who you don't want seeing it.

Tony EH

theguzman wrote: »

I had a series of unfortunate dates recently and it made me post this thread.

So the first date was with a 28 year old woman from Cork and boy did I misjudge that book by its cover badly. Midway through the date she started lecturing me for having previously dated a foreign woman and how I should have only dated Irish women. Low point was when she basically alluded that should we ever have sex that I'd have to be STD screened since those types are full of disease.

I excused myself to the bathroom and debated doing a runner but returned and handled it more maturely had her blocked within hours from all social networks and apps. She works in an ok job and I would have thought she'd have more interactions with foreigners than to have such disgusting viewpoints.

Prior to the date she kept sending me pictures of her two small dogs, including parading them around her local town in a push pram and the dogs seemed to have several sets of doggy clothes also. Her main conversatons were the dogs and her hatred for her sisters boyfriend who had gotten her sister pregnant and constantly disrespecting him due to him being useless in a low paid job. I didn't know the guy but from what I could gather he was trying his best for kid and mum.

Anyway got out of dodge there big time.

Fast forward to the second disaster, met another girl who was 33 and I was interested enough in her. Again like the first girl she was totally obsessed with dogs and has six dogs, a big alsation, two collies and a Labrador and two small fluffy pipsqueeks. Her life seemed to revolve around working 3 x 12 hrs shifts and then walking her dogs. No way Jose! I was out of there like a burnt cat out of hell, there was definite psychological issues going on with her and whilst she lacked the vile judgemental racist overtones of the first girl such an obsession with dogs is a severe turn-off for me. I could tolerate a really small house dog who would be confined to the porch or backyard but not having big dogs having free roam of the house and into the bed etc! Yuck!

Unusualy to have such a string of dating disasters but eh. dust myself off and try again. What would be deal-breakers in a situation like that?

It's stories like those above that make me feel truly grateful that I never had a "date" (these were American things in my day) in my life.

I was just lucky I spose. Met girls the old fashioned way, friends of friends in a boozer, over a few pints. So they were well vetted before I went anywhere alone with them. :pac:

I don't think I could ever put myself on a dating app or trust anyone I met on one. Such a minefield of gigantic proportions.

KathleenGrant

Assetbacked wrote: »

That female friend must have some serious men hang ups.

While dick pics are lowest common denominator males, the women who get vindictive about them betray something not quite right with themselves.

If some guy sent a woman he wasn't seeing romantically a dick pic she didn't ask for he hardly could be furious at a woman passing it on. Could he not see how stupid he was to begin with?

Assetbacked

KathleenGrant wrote: »

If some guy sent a woman he wasn't seeing romantically a dick pic she didn't ask for he hardly could be furious at a woman passing it on. Could he not see how stupid he was to begin with?

I'm just thinking about it from the perspective of myself and if a female I'd been chatting to from tinder sent me a selfie of her box. It would be a big fat "no" from me for meeting up and I would delete her as a contact, but I wouldn't go shaming her to her family.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Assetbacked wrote: »

I'm just thinking about it from the perspective of myself and if a female I'd been chatting to from tinder sent me a selfie of her box. It would be a big fat "no" from me for meeting up and I would delete her as a contact, but I wouldn't go shaming her to her family.

If you got quite a lot of those though? If it was a frequent, apropos of nothing follow up to "hello"? If a response to you saying "it was nice to meet you but I didn't feel the spark, thanks and good luck" was basically "well then I'm going to flash you"? Might you get a bit fed up and consider hitting back?

As I said I don't think she's ever actually done it, but hey the threat of it might have saved some other woman the sight. Reacting verbally with indignation or anger or disgust only seems to please them more.

It's mad how quickly dick pics have gotten so normalised that a proportionate response to them is seen as bad manners and a poor reflection on the person who got sent it.

creditcarder

Journee Odd Pensioner wrote: »

If you got quite a lot of those though? If it was a frequent, apropos of nothing follow up to "hello"? If a response to you saying "it was nice to meet you but I didn't feel the spark, thanks and good luck" was basically "well then I'm going to flash you"? Might you get a bit fed up and consider hitting back?

As I said I don't think she's ever actually done it, but hey the threat of it might have saved some other woman the sight. Reacting verbally with indignation or anger or disgust only seems to please them more.

It's mad how quickly dick pics have gotten so normalised that a proportionate response to them is seen as bad manners and a poor reflection on the person who got sent it.

Are they common? Tbh, a lot of the older women I talk to thinks its just trying to keep up with the jonses. Kind of like if all men were complaining about having too big of a penis, and most men would just go along with it.

Feisar

Assetbacked wrote: »

I'm just thinking about it from the perspective of myself and if a female I'd been chatting to from tinder sent me a selfie of her box. It would be a big fat "no" from me for meeting up and I would delete her as a contact, but I wouldn't go shaming her to her family.

Tell the truth, if she was hot you’d be on it like a car bonnet!

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

creditcarder wrote: »

Are they common? Tbh, a lot of the older women I talk to thinks its just trying to keep up with the jonses. Kind of like if all men were complaining about having too big of a penis, and most men would just go along with it.

Seem to be, I haven't been single since the dating apps took off though and that seems to be the worst for them. Like I've been shown enough of them by enough recipients to think they're fairly common. Or maybe my friends just bring it out in people

My favourite was the guy who sent pictures of a family christening. Here's my suit, here's my nephew, here's the church, here's the pub where we had the reception, here's my dick in the pub bathroom, here's the cake...

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Assetbacked wrote: »

Two words; daddy issues.

I’m... not sure that’s something you’d want to rely on or that they’re as common as you are hoping. It’s easy to say at 31 that there’s another 20 years in it. I mean, knock yourself out believing that but you’ll likely be disappointed.

Tony EH

Khalil Scarce Bagpipes wrote: »

Not "on the market" but they'd be:

-- Smoking, drug use, or excessive drinking
-- Bad grammar/spelling
-- Every third word is "like"
-- Culturally illiterate. You don't have to be the editor of the Times Literary Supplement, but some awareness of art, literature, music, and culture before 1990 matters
-- Left-wing politics. A centrist is fine, but I couldn't deal with a Sinn Fein / People Before Profit type
-- Woke politics. Even worse
-- Expects a text exchange every 30 minutes
-- No ambition, goals, or plan in life
-- Bad table manners
-- Rudeness
-- Any signs of controlling or narcissistic behavior
-- Someone who just wants to complain rather than figure out solutions
-- Stuck in a rut or unwilling to try new things
-- Isn't physically affectionate

:pac:

You just crossed yourself off your own list.

Assetbacked

Feisar wrote: »

Tell the truth, if she was hot you’d be on it like a car bonnet!

If it's too good to be true etc.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

I’m... not sure that’s something you’d want to rely on or that they’re as common as you are hoping. It’s easy to say at 31 that there’s another 20 years in it. I mean, knock yourself out believing that but you’ll likely be disappointed.

I'll cross that bridge if it ever arises but it is pretty evident from my own experience to date. Of course, there are the celebrity cases too which would give an old man hope;

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7018737/Lady-Kitty-Spencer-28-fashion-tycoon-boyfriend-spotted-leaving-luxury-New-York-hotel.html

She's 28, he's 60. Her parents divorced when she was 7.

EmmetSpiceland

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

I’m... not sure that’s something you’d want to rely on or that they’re as common as you are hoping. It’s easy to say at 31 that there’s another 20 years in it. I mean, knock yourself out believing that but you’ll likely be disappointed.

It’s fine if you’re a good looking guy, who dresses well, shaves and keeps in “shape”.

If you’re some red faced clown with long, messy, hair, a scraggly beard, overweight, wears converse runners with “bootcut” jeans you can forgot about getting near any young ones with “daddy issues”.

So I don’t think these lads on here will be doing anything other than what they’re doing now, sitting in, playing computer games and “whacking off” to Japanese cartoon porn.

Feet. I like a nice pair of feet so if a date turns up in heels or sandals or whatever and has horrible feet, deal breaker. Skinny big toes are a particularly egregious offence.

Assetbacked

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

It’s fine if you’re a good looking guy, who dresses well, shaves and keeps in “shape”.

If you’re some red faced clown with long, messy, hair, a scraggly beard, overweight, wears converse runners with “bootcut” jeans you can forgot about getting near any young ones with “daddy issues”.

So I don’t think these lads on here will be doing anything other than what they’re doing now, sitting in, playing computer games and “whacking off” to Japanese cartoon porn.

Mid-00s Boards.ie called and wants its generalisations back.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Assetbacked wrote: »

If it's too good to be true etc.



I'll cross that bridge if it ever arises but it is pretty evident from my own experience to date. Of course, there are the celebrity cases too which would give an old man hope;

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7018737/Lady-Kitty-Spencer-28-fashion-tycoon-boyfriend-spotted-leaving-luxury-New-York-hotel.html

She's 28, he's 60. Her parents divorced when she was 7.

You’re 31.

Tycoon scores young one. I. Am. Shocked. I already mentioned celebs and how their lives give false hope. Very rich men are also in that category.

Assetbacked

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts wrote: »

You’re 31.

Tycoon scores young one. I. Am. Shocked.

Personal experience, yes, but also via this personal experience (i.e. friends of my friend) it is evident. It's not news to highlight that girls with daddy issues like older guys. Daddy issues does not even mean not having a dad, just one that is absent, whether physically or emotionally. These girls go for older guys as guys their own age, they say, are so immature.

And I'm not saying this in some sort of dating-tactics/creep sort of way, just highlighting this fact in the context of not dating girls over 30 if ever I find myself single in the future.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

It’s fine if you’re a good looking guy, who dresses well, shaves and keeps in “shape”.

If you’re some red faced clown with long, messy, hair, a scraggly beard, overweight, wears converse runners with “bootcut” jeans you can forgot about getting near any young ones with “daddy issues”.

So I don’t think these lads on here will be doing anything other than what they’re doing now, sitting in, playing computer games and “whacking off” to Japanese cartoon porn.

To be honest, even those 40-somethings weren’t on the radar of my circle in our 20s. It’s not impossible but just rare.

Ficheall

Deleted User wrote: »

Feet. I like a nice pair of feet so if a date turns up in heels or sandals or whatever and has horrible feet, deal breaker. Skinny big toes are a particularly egregious offence.

This reminds me of a poster on a previous thread of the same ilk, who listed shoelaces that were tied too tight as a deal-breaker. Wasn't even in a bondage context, which one could understand.

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

Assetbacked wrote: »

Personal experience, yes, but also via this personal experience (i.e. friends of my friend) it is evident. It's not news to highlight that girls with daddy issues like older guys. Daddy issues does not even mean not having a dad, just one that is absent, whether physically or emotionally. These girls go for older guys as guys their own age, they say, are so immature.

Alrighty then.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Ah now. The fella who's explicitly seeking out young wans who are damaged by their sh1tty dads to bang is saying my friend has issues with men?

Yeah, stick yo dick in that childhood trauma, happy days. Make an empty threat to forward dick pics, vindictive and issues with men.

Alrighty then.

pq0n1ct4ve8zf5

Ficheall wrote: »

This reminds me of a poster on a previous thread of the same ilk, who listed shoelaces that were tied too tight as a deal-breaker. Wasn't even in a bondage context, which one could understand.

I remember that too but then they posted an example picture and I was 100% on board. It was one of the most unattractive things I've ever seen!

farmchoice

Assetbacked wrote: »

That female friend must have some serious men hang ups.

While dick pics are lowest common denominator males, the women who get vindictive about them betray something not quite right with themselves.

is this really a thing, like do grown men actually take pictures of their cocks and send them to woman?

obviously i have heard about it but i thought it was more of a urban myth or at the very least the preserve of idiot teenagers.
why in the name of Christ would anyone think that any woman would want such a picture?

Assetbacked

Journee Odd Pensioner wrote: »

Ah now. The fella who's explicitly seeking out young wans who are damaged by their sh1tty dads to bang is saying my friend has issues with men?

Yeah, stick yo dick in that childhood trauma, happy days. Make an empty threat to forward dick pics, vindictive and issues with men.

Alrighty then.

Never have I said it was solely to, use your phrase, "bang" them - it was a rule of not dating under 30s should I ever find myself single. However, this was admittedly not tried and tested in the real world. In addition, it only relates to dating and early dating turn-offs. It would also be further contextualised by not having kids if I found myself single and older.

I spoke about your friend by relating to her situation if I was bombarded with selfies of women's parts and felt that a reaction in line with your friend's is OTT. Is she single now and still looking?

Obvious Desperate Breakfasts

H3llR4iser wrote: »

However, I've known plenty of women who have the "somebody will give me a lift, I don't need to drive" mentality - it's a very tricky one to figure out, just like the following one about drinking. Usually, it takes a few months of "free taxi driver" work before you realize what's going on :mad:

Yeah, my mother doesn’t drive and lives rurally but she has some pretty strict rules in place re: lifts. It helps that she’s teetotal and never goes to pubs. She would accept lifts as little as possible and never takes lifts off couples because she believes that couple car time is when couples often talk about stuff or just have the craic and she wouldn’t want to encroach on that. She got a lift to work with a co-worker semi-regularly and was insistent on paying a yearly fee.

Mad_maxx

uses gender pronouns on social media

Feisar

So can we all agree dick pics are a no no?

KiKi III

Assetbacked wrote: »

Personal experience, yes, but also via this personal experience (i.e. friends of my friend) it is evident. It's not news to highlight that girls with daddy issues like older guys. Daddy issues does not even mean not having a dad, just one that is absent, whether physically or emotionally. These girls go for older guys as guys their own age, they say, are so immature.

And I'm not saying this in some sort of dating-tactics/creep sort of way, just highlighting this fact in the context of not dating girls over 30 if ever I find myself single in the future.

There is no non-creepy way of saying you'd happily use a woman's childhood abandonment issues to pursue her when you're much older than she is. None at all.