Does anyone else think this is odd.

meeeeh

Hello 11 wrote: »

Lost of interesting responses and quite different points of view.

I suppose maybe I was just brought up differently to her and alot of others commenting. I think if someone is a guest in your house and you walk to work with them the next day (we have no choice, we live in office blocks beside each other ) it's the height of bad manners to invite your friend and then just walk ahead and ignore them.

If my family saw me do that to anyone who was a friend male or female they wouldn't be impressed with me to say the least.

Maybe she doesn't realise how rude it is but if so the lack of awareness is very odd.

You didn't get the response you wanted to get from some of us so you decided that our opinion must be wrong because we were brought up wrong.

LegacyUser

meeeeh wrote: »

You didn't get the response you wanted to get from some of us so you decided that our opinion must be wrong because we were brought up wrong.

I never expected any particular response hence me asking the question.

I never said anyone was brought up " wrong" , I said differently. With a different set of manners and what's acceptable and what's not.

blarb

I see 3 options OP. I wouldn't be playing a game figuring out how long it takes her to notice you fall behind/go a different way or whatever. I think being upfront is better.

I'd say the best options, depending on what you actually want to happen here, are:
1) If you would now prefer the friend not to come at all, explain that you like the time with her, and the nights that you stay could it be just the two of you
2) If you would just prefer be included in the conversation, then explain that to her. That you don't mind the friend coming along but you actually feel like a bit of a spare wheel so far.
3) If you're not that bothered about walking in together, just start leaving earlier, telling her I'll give her the time with her friend, and grab yourself a coffee or newspaper or something along the way.

I do agree that it's quite rude (regardless of gender!) and I'd just note it and pay attention to how she is in other situations with you. Or is it just in this particular situation that she's quite unaware of how she's acting/affecting you. But either way, if this is the only thing bothering you so far, I'd give her the benefit of the doubt but either say something (as in the points above) or change up your routine.

LegacyUser

I actually just ended it there after considering over the weekend.

This was not the only example of this sort of behaviour but it was the main driver. I think our values and manners just didn't match.

Thanks to all that posted.

woodchuck

Mod note:

OP as your issues has reached a conclusion, I'll close this thread now.