Co-worker keeps asking me for money

Batgurl

My take is a little different on this OP.

Is this person very young/naive/newly graduated/fresh to the professional world?

I’ve come across staff who have lived very sheltered lives, always relying on either the bank of mummy and daddy, and/or always had other people do everything for them.

They come out into the “real world” with no concept of what’s acceptable behaviour. I once had a naive member of my team call in sick for a week because they had been given an eviction notice on their apartment and they genuinely didn’t know how to cope or what to do.

She sounds like this person who is just so used to having everything handed to them on a plate. I think a brief conversation “no I will not lend you money and that is not an acceptable request to make to colleagues in a working environment. Please do not do it again.”

Grab All Association

gwalk wrote: »

Can you point me in the direction of where you get your drugs for €3 please

its eh for a friend

They don’t just beg one person. They’ll do it throughout the day and depending on how many people feel sorry for them, in Dublin they can earn €20-30 within a hour on foot

joeguevara

Grab All Association wrote: »

If you randomly came up and asked me for 30c on the street, 30c my assumption would be that you were short 30c for the parking meter or the bus. €2, €3 I’d assume you were going to spend it to buy alcohol or drugs. I think most people wouldn’t care about someone asking for 30c.

I meant that I would feel bad asking anyone even colleagues for a tiny amount. The fact that someone would ask for 350 beggars belief.

Ursus Horribilis

Not asking someone you know for 30c sounds crazy to my ears. It is such a miniscule amount of money, to think that there's shame in asking someone for it beggars belief. Would you really have walked home or only taken a partial bus journey rather than ask a colleague for 30c? If that happened in my office, not only would you be given 30c but you'd be asked if it was enough to get you home? And you'd be called an eejit for even considering trying to get home without the full fare

Owing money sometimes happens in my office and nobody bats an eyelid. Someone might be nipping out to the supermarket to get a few things and asks does anybody want anything? (This would be small items of food usually) If they don't happen to have the money on them at the time because of it being a spur of the moment thing, or they only have a large bank note, it gets settled up later on. It doesn't mean anything other than someone didn't have €2 in their wallet at the time. I once bailed out a colleague who had forgotten his wallet and gave him money to buy his lunch. He had the money for me the next day. No biggie at all. These are the sorts of normal interactions that happen in a workplace where people trust each other and behave like adults.

Back to the OP, I can only agree with the others. Say a firm no to this woman. If it was me, I'd say I don't loan money to people (I don't). As you can see, there are differing opinions on what to say to her. The main thing here is to be firm and consistent with your refusal.

mfceiling

Little move that we did on a lad a few years back.
He constantly was asking every day for a euro here or 2 euros for something else.

The lads just fought fire with fire. 20 minutes before break one lad would ask him for a fiver. A minute later someone would ask him for a euro. 5 minutes later he would be asked for 2 euro. At least 6 or 7 lads would ask him for a lend every day.
This went on for a month...Just basically annoying him before he got to anyone else. He got the message fairly lively.

dellas1979

The Young Wan wrote: »

When I told her no, I wasn't going to give her anything as I have an expensive bill to pay already, "can't it wait until Monday for you to pay it?" I found that particularly rude and didn't respond.

That gave me a great laugh - thanks very much OP and inconsiderate lady.

Id just start laughing at her at this stage and shame her instead in a "are you for real/do you hear yourself-no ahahaha" way.

I once had a colleague come up to me and ask me if I was going to the canteen. I said no (I was sitting at my desk). She said, "would you go down for me anyways? I want a chocolate bar and am too lazy to walk down"

Same lady, we were at a house party one night in another colleagues house. And she demanded I go up stairs into my colleagues bedroom to get her a pair of socks as her feet were cold.

I.swear.to.God

wiggle16

Mod note:

Posters are reminded to keep posts on topic and address replies to the OP.

StinkyMunkey

Op your colleague is a compulsive spender who will always borrow, max her card, have loans on the go constantly, always be behind in rent, lives hand to mouth etc etc etc.....

She is self absorbed and cannot fathom that you or anyone else have bills to pay or may need the money you have for something.

Do yourself a huge favour and never loan this person another cent, if you do it will encourage her to ask you constantly.

The simplest and easiest way to stop this is a simple "no I don't have it", after a couple of times she will not see you as a target for borrowing.

Your wasting your breath trying to explain it to her any other way - being so self absorbed she won't be able to comprehend you simple are not an ATM For her to use.

I've plenty of experience dealing with this type of person, the path of least resistance is a simple "no I don't have it".

Panthro

OP fair dues you know her behaviour is completely out of order.
As everyone else has said, do not give her money. Do not engage. She's a fraud.

Hold the chin up high, you've recognised a complete fraud, let her go an Shyte.