Jesus Wept! THAT Hurt!!!

Stigura

Come on; Ye can't make an omelette without breaking eggs. We 'Do It Ourselves'. We use tools. Sharp. Nasty. Pointy. Cutty things. 'It happens! Let's hear about the times!

Nothing too graphic. Let's keep it 'amusing'. Stuff we can look back on and laughingly say; " I'll Never be doing That again!!! ".

I'll kick us off. Couple of memorable acts of unfathomable stupidity.


I'm nineteen. Plenty old enough to know what's what. I'm sat, alone, in a big armchair. In a room. What could possibly go wrong?

And, I'm staring at this hole. Low in the wall. Just near my comfy chair.

I don't remember why, now. But, the skirting board and a plug socket had been torn away. Now, I'm focused on this hole in the wall, where that used to be.

I remember there were three, taped up, spikes of wire. Coming out the end of a standard, white plastic sheaf. Obviously a work in progress then. That'll be going into the back of the modern, new plug socket.

But, never mind that. What's caught my eye is the dark, gnarly, Thick end of a twisted copper wire. Back there, in the black sootiness of this ancient hole in the brick work.

Copper. My life revolved around copper. Copper was Money! And, I wondered how much of the wonderful stuff was in there? If I got a Really good grip on that, pulled, hard and steadily? How much might I be able to draw from these old foundations?

I leaned toward it .....


Ye can guess the rest Kherist almighty! I have Never got such a belt, before or since! It nearly took my Arm off!!!

Stigura

Just the other day. Using my 48mm Hole Saw Vs 1" Plank. On an el cheapo 'work mate' effort. Scary!

Drill's doing alright. But, saw's seemingly taking for ever, to get through this plank.

Saw's screaming. Smoke's issuing. I'm sweating and swearing.

Then, I have this idea: As I'm going in at a slight angle, I know the saw is gonna break through at one side of the circle before the other. Yeah?

So; If I can discern just how far the first edge is through ....?

And, I reach beneath the table, to feel for the edge of the ~ turned off ~ Hole Cutter!!!

The pain just Wouldn't stop!!! All the running cold taps in the world weren't making That bad boy go away! And the Blister, the next day?! Something to behold! :eek:

Tell me how

Consider yourself a lucky man.

Mate of mine was working on an ESB powerline when lightening hit the line somewhere. He couldn't feel his arms for about 6 hours. Said it was like being hit in the chest with a sledgehammer.

Sleeper12

I'm a plumber over 30 years. I've drilled through pipes and cables. I've gotten more electric shocks than I care to remember, most the fault of the homeowner fussing about & saying that they turned off the isolation switch when they didn't. Several times an electric shower has been live even though the isolation switch is off. I've cut myself hundreds & hundreds of times on broken tiles. Always keep paper stitches in the van. I rarely use a hammer but I have hit my thumb a time or two. I've burnt myself on hot drill bits. Come close to cutting the tip off my finger a few times. It's all so run of the mill for most tradesmen that very few individual cases will spring to mind.

Stigura

Not me. But, I've always relished this one! Donkeys years ago, living in a rented flatlet, our landlady had a crew of Evangelical (Happy, Clappy type) 'Born Again Christian' builders practically move in with us, as they carried out works on our place.

It was 'Testing' .....

Might well have been the exact same crew I later heard about, operating in the same city? I like to think so. One of them, in particular, seemed to have a hard time keeping up the 'Thing'. I reckon this was him!

Seems they're working in a roof space. Matey is just going in, or coming down. Maybe he's exchanging notes about the Glory of Jesus with his mate up top?

Either way, he has his finger tips on the sill of the big hatch. Yes. When the big hatch slams down!

They reckon it was like he was starting Sanchin Kata! Long, deep, hissing inhalation. Head back. Eyes rolling.

Then, his chin hit his chest. Face absolutely scarlet. Snapped back. Hissing through gritted teeth. Eyes clenched shut.

Time stood still.

Then, his eyes snapped open. Wide and staring. His lips trembled. Opened. As he gasped in air .....

" PRAISE THE LORD!!! "

Knowing what a nasty piece of work he really was, beneath this thin and newly acquired veneer, to this day, I always get a good belly laugh out of the memory of that incident!

Stigura

Sleeper12 wrote: »

I'm a plumber over 30 years ..... It's all so run of the mill for most tradesmen that very few individual cases will spring to mind.

Sorry. I thought this was the DIY board ..... Us 'Have A Go Heroe's'. Not you time served, DeWalt packing pro's. Bet ye hair shirt is a genuine Snickers?


Spoke to a Plumber one time though. Mentioned how it has always struck me as a trade I could have lived with. Generally ensuring ye'd get home at the end of the day ...

He told me about the time he was on top of a twenty odd story tower block. Pitched roof that ran right down to the exterior wall of the place. He's shimmying down there, to have a look at the Stink Pipe.

He's got down there and is sat, on the edge of the wall. Legs dangling over the abyss, with the top of the stink pipe between his legs.

He's trying not to notice the ant like people below. Concentrates on the pipe. Wiggles it in his hands.

And, I'm quite sure I must have gone pale. I know I almost threw up, when he described how it came away in his hands! :eek:

Ye know that ghastly sensation, when ye whole system automatically struggles to maintain balance? Very muscles of the bum ye sitting on desperately firing messages to ye synapses. Begging brain to communicate, fast enough, with spine, legs, Everybody!!! ..... He couldn't just Drop the bloody thing!

Locksmithing appealed more, after hearing that one!

policarp

Ouch, Ouch and Ouch.
Childhood lessons never learned.

sbs2010

Driving a decking screw into one of the planks, the drill bit slipped put of the screw head.
With the pressure i had on the drill, it carried down and before i knew it the drill bit was ripping through the tip of one of my fingers.
Didn't go fully through, just ripped up the nail.
Bad but not horrific.

Seanieke

Was working on a site a few years back where the apprentice alarm fitter drilled straight through the middle of this thumb nail and into the steel he was originally trying to drill into.

The problem... The only way to resolve the issue was to reverse the drill or undo the chuck and slide his thumb back over the drill bit.

Can't remember what he chose.

Stigura

Oooohh, yeahh! This is what we're here for!

Carry on, lads!

my3cents

Something really tame that bothers me is all the swarf you get attached to modern screws.

Drive a few screws with a electric drill/driver and the tips of your fingers end up full of tiny bits of metal swarf. Rediculus to have to wear gloves to hold a screw.

On a more cutting note. I've planned the tops of my fingers off twice. Only just the the very tips but takes ages to heal. Don't try to plane down a bit of wood to finish a job in a hurry by holding it in one hand and the plane in the other, should be obvious

Stigura

my3cents wrote: »

Something really tame that bothers me is all the swarf you get attached to modern screws.

Well played, sir! And I honestly thought it was just a Me thing!

A day on the nest boxes, and the tip of the index finger of my left hand is a prickly bloody ruin!

I use those lovely, black, 'Dry Lining screws. But, yeah; End up with a finger tip that could hold a magnet!

my3cents

Stigura wrote: »

Well played, sir! And I honestly thought it was just a Me thing!

A day on the nest boxes, and the tip of the index finger of my left hand is a prickly bloody ruin!

I use those lovely, black, 'Dry Lining screws. But, yeah; End up with a finger tip that could hold a magnet!

I've just put up a shed extension and used the green coated decking screws, not a problem with them at all. Smallest size I can get them (use for sidings) is number 8 x 2 inches which might be OK for nest boxes if you are using half inch or thicker plank.

Lumen

The thing I really hate is the foresight ignored.

That quiet little voice in my head saying "don't do that, something bad will happen".

Case in point, hanging solid steel guttering brackets on the top rung of a 4m ladder. Little voice says no, stupid says go.

Move the ladder to the next spot, bracket falls off and hits me on the noggin after accelerating for 2m. The scream could be heard for miles.

No blood though, so it doesn't count.

my3cents

Lumen wrote: »

The thing I really hate is the foresight ignored.

That quiet little voice in my head saying "don't do that, something bad will happen".

.....

Just what happened each time I planed my finger tips second time doubly so

Stigura

Lumen wrote: »

No blood though, so it doesn't count.

Oh yes it does! Because I'm sat here, PMSL!

BrokenArrows

Ive somehow managed to avoid injury over the years even with the countless stupid things i did.

I think the worst has been stepping on a dirty rusty nail. Mainly the inconvenience of having to go and get the multiple tetanus vaccines.

listermint

Going into a Mains Supply with a Kangoo, the heat welded the top of the breaker bit and took a circular arc out of the tip.

Scary - yes multiplied by 100.

Lucky ?

Yes, but the earth in the cable did its job luckily for me safety standards are what they are.

Injured? no just my brain and ego were severely hampered.

Bonzo Delaney

From a chop saw leaving a scar between my thumb ands index finger because dum dum here tied up the blade when the guard spring broke. 10 stiches
Skill saw ran back up over my leg when a 9x2 joist binded and saw jumped 12 stitches
Cutting trees in the teleporter bucket cut a branch that wwas forced down by the bucket it sprung back burst my lip open 8 stitches
More recently fell of tressle scaffold can't for the life of me think how ... discolated shoulder .

Numerous splinters Stanley blade nicks. bastid screw swarf splinters. electric shocks sprained foot hit the wrong nail a few times also
Reading that back I should really try another career.

Stigura

Bonzo Delaney wrote: »

Reading that back I should really try another career.

Thanks! I was Literally sipping my tea as I read that!

Not DIY related. But, put me down as: " Nearly choked to death, while reading a forum post and drinking tea! "

K.Flyer

Not me, but a very very good friend of mine was using an electric planer to level down an out of line timber stud on a wall he wanted straight and level to tile.
Long story short, he was holding the stud that he was planing, he slipped, and ran the planer straight across the palm of his hand, resulting in skin and blood everywhere.
I still squirm when I remember it, I finished off the job for him while he was in bandages.

my3cents

K.Flyer wrote: »

Not me, but a very very good friend of mine was using an electric planer to level down an out of line timber stud on a wall he wanted straight and level to tile.
Long story short, he was holding the stud that he was planing, he slipped, and ran the planer straight across the palm of his hand, resulting in skin and blood everywhere.
I still squirm when I remember it, I finished off the job for him while he was in bandages.

Thats what I have done to the tips of my fingers twice with a hand plane. At least doing that has prevented me from holding a piece of wood in one hand while planing it with an electric planer in the other. PLenty of times I've told myself "clamp that before you put the electric plane on it, its just not worth the risk".

So two other nasty ones with 4 1/2 inch angle grinders. First sharpening a pair of shears can't remember exactly what happened but I ripped my shirt into shreds and nearly ground my left tit off. Second I nearly took my balls off. Was off to the tip with a car load of rubbish and decided to take some old metal box section I had. Used the grinder one handed on the steel on the ground I was kneeling and the box section pinched the disk which flew backwards between my legs just missing my balls while grinding an interesting bloody line up up my left buttock and ruining a pair of trousers and my day.

btw anyone know why we are so keen to show what idiots we can be

Stigura

my3cents wrote: »

I ripped my shirt into shreds and nearly ground my left tit off. Second I nearly took my balls off.

I feel ye pain, brother!!!

Learning Nothing from the butcher who thought he could do my job; I decided I could dispense with the Farrier! Bought myself one of these four inch discs with nasty, raised metal snags all over them. Remove hoof like no body's business!

But, my back's knackered, so, I'm like kneeling down beside this donkey. Got his back foot resting on my thigh. Holding that steady with one hand. Trying to operate the grinder with the other .....

Sort of writes itself, doesn't it? A perfect storm

Both mine happened working with my dad who was a carpenter.

First was when I was 7 and up on scaffolding helping to paint an extension. One of the lads also working on the job went to get on the same plank and it just snapped.
I ended up covered in paint (dad still laughs about it as all he could see was my eyes) and a sprained ankle. Still think it's the reason I am not great with heights and the ankle still gets turned very easily.

Second time was when I was 16 and working with him and his gang and got stuck being dogs body for the plasterer. Stood on a nail that was in a puddle of wet plaster. Had to work for another two weeks at the same job with the same boots, and ended up with my foot looking like it was rotting off with dermatitis. Not the a it's just a little itchy type of flare up, more bleeding, raw skin, nearly septic, couldn't walk on it for three months type.
I still get a flare up on my hands every now and again even now, especially when I might spill some finish like danish oil on them.

cheif kaiser

An Electrician friend of mine was doing a job and has to drill through a foot thick wall in the basement of an old hotel. So off he goes with his hammer drill, get half way in and half the hotel suddenly goes black. Realising he had drilled through something serious, he pulls the drill out and out comes the drill bit, smoking red hot. He doesn't know what to do, so sticks it in an open can of paint lying nearby and the paint proceeds to burst into flames He managed to extinguish the flames and made a hasty exit.

Turns out he had drilled straight through a major ESB cable so was lucky to be alive!

Stigura

Cheif Kaiser; What with you, and Listermint, up at eighteen there ..... It makes me Really happy to know for a fact that the only electrics, in my place, are about a decade old and all channeled through visible conduit!

Having said that? Later today, I must try to find the photo I think I have, of the utter carnage I caused with a single panel pin! :eek:

Nobody got hurt. But, the electricity switch board declared they were treating it an an emergency.

A seriously time served and incredibly experienced and qualified Spark then asked if he could have the physical evidence. He wanted to use it, to show apprentices what one imbecile could manage, with one tiny, metal spike

Not one of my proudest moments.

Hotblack Desiato

Not my fault and didn't cause injury - but this was about 12 years ago, a while after we bought a house from the DIYer from hell.

I was cutting into the crappy laminate floor in the box bedroom to remove it, when there was a bang - but how? The circular saw was barely going into the underlay.

Turned out the bedside lamp on the wall was getting its supply from a spur off the nearest socket - using ALARM WIRE running unprotected between the foam underlay and the laminate - then into the back of the socket, unfused of course.

Between that and a few other things it was amazing nobody got killed or the place burnt down. We got the whole house rewired shortly afterwards.

my3cents

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

Not my fault and didn't cause injury - but this was about 12 years ago, a while after we bought a house from the DIYer from hell.

I was cutting into the crappy laminate floor in the box bedroom to remove it, when there was a bang - but how? The circular saw was barely going into the underlay.

Turned out the bedside lamp on the wall was getting its supply from a spur off the nearest socket - using ALARM WIRE running unprotected between the foam underlay and the laminate - then into the back of the socket, unfused of course.

Between that and a few other things it was amazing nobody got killed or the place burnt down. We got the whole house rewired shortly afterwards.

I got asked once by a neighbor to help out another local, an old guy, to put in central heating. Hmmmmm :rolleyes: Anyway I wandered along and at least stopped the old guy adding a plug socket to power the boiler by putting a double socket on the wall and powering it from another socket by plugging in an extension lead he had made up by putting a 13amp plug on each end :eek:

Hotblack Desiato

Aka 'suicide cable', often used to illegally hook up a generator to house wiring.

Plugging it into one half of a double socket to power the (presumably not connected to anything) other half is rather 'special'. Creative, but not in a good way.

my3cents

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

Aka 'suicide cable', often used to illegally hook up a generator to house wiring.

Plugging it into one half of a double socket to power the (presumably not connected to anything) other half is rather 'special'. Creative, but not in a good way.

Never given it a name but that one certainly fits.

sbsquarepants

Didn't hurt as such but could have been an absolute disaster.

Was fitting an extractor fan, the type that comes on automatically when you open a fake press above the cooker. I had it fitted but it was slightly crooked so i loosened the screws and with the screw driver in my hand i pulled on it to adjust. Due to not having a proper grip and it being very tightly wedged in, my hand slipped off and i stabbed myself quite forcefully, right on the bony edge of my eye socket.

A couple of mill to the side and i'd have punctured my eyeball with the screwdriver!:eek::eek:

Lex Luthor

had to stop reading after the 4th post, these types of threads give me the eeby jeebies

Lumen

Hotblack Desiato wrote: »

Aka 'suicide cable', often used to illegally hook up a generator to house wiring.

Plugging it into one half of a double socket to power the (presumably not connected to anything) other half is rather 'special'. Creative, but not in a good way.

That reminds me of a physics experiment I conducted in the kitchen when I was a kid.

Connected live and neutral cores of a 13A cable plugged into the kitchen wall socket to either end of a piece of broken glass, held the glass over the hob, thermal runaway melts glass just before fuse blows.

That is right up there with my other teen experiments: self-anesthesia using chloroform stolen from the chem lab, and an attempt to make gunpowder while squatting on the flat roof of our house extension (fortunately my ingredients were too coarsely powdered to generate a proper bang).

It's amazing I'm still alive...

antiskeptic

Classic pushing a chisel (sharp) and holding the end of the piece of wood I was pushing into. Chisel came to the surface, skated down the piece of wood and embedded itself deep into the bone on the tip of my middle finger. I pulled my hand away, fingers pointed downward and the chisel just hung there Edward Scissors hand-like whilst I went white. A good count of 5 until the pain started.

Stigura

^^^ Ouch!!!

policarp

Always do a risk assessment.
Even if it's everyday chore.
Working, driving,craft work,
Accidents do happen.

Stigura

Well, Mr Elf 'n safety; I just finished staining a couple of foot of plank! Two and a half pints inside me. Absolutely No 'Risk Assessment', beyond shutting the Dogs in here!

Whaddya say to that?! (Other than it makes for a boring thread)

chillyspoon

I got a kickback on my tablesaw a couple of months back while running some rebates around drawer components.

The workpiece was fired into my stomach like a bullet and brought me to my knees, winded but thoroughly grateful that a few scrapes and some bruising were the only visible evidence.

This is the piece that hit me: https://www.instagram.com/p/BylKkfLipBx/

Stigura

I've never forgotten, when I was at school. The woodwork room had a big old table saw in a small side room. The room had doors with that wired glass in them. Ye basically walked into the room and were standing at the saw, good to go.

One day, some of us gathered behind the teacher, Mr Jeffries, as he was preparing to cut some wood. He asked us to please move out. Then he showed us the state of the window in the door we'd just come through. Looked like it had stopped a round! Right about face height too.

Sure enough, Chillyspoon; Bit of wood. Knot, perhaps? But, he said, from that day on, he'd Never again operate that saw with anyone else in the room.

listermint

doesnt take a note, slight change in your stance can make it bind and presto wham.

done it myself before. Nice crack in the stomach of a piece. Joyful. Thats why i always tell people they are a bloody dangerous machine and should really be used for small repetitive work.

_Brian

I was removing a part of the tractor one day and it was particularly resilient.

3/4 drive Tbar and a 2ft length of gunbarrel pulling and pulling with one foot on the wheel for leverage.

Socket slipped, came towards my face, turned face away but got clocked on temple and was out cold for 30minutes.

Stigura

:eek: F***ing hell, Brian! I think you just won todays cigar with That one!!!

my3cents

If we are including vehicles then one of many I have was years back changing the clutch on an old (rear wheel drive) Viva. To do that you had to drop the prop shaft off first. I was working jammed under the car with the barest space to work in (car was on axle stands) and after taking of the 4 nuts from the flange that connected it to universal joint at back of the differential it wasn't moving. It was getting late and I was getting p!ssed off. I squeezed further under the car so I could get right under the prop shaft and get both hands on it. I pulled and pulled until with most of my weight hanging off it I pulled the shaft down on my body and smashed myself in the face with the flange on the universal joint. Big black eye and bruised cheek, very nearly took my eye out. For those that haven't worked on old rear wheel drive cars the prop shaft is a heavy steel tube in this case about 4 inches in diameter and 3ft long.

Bonzo Delaney

my3cents wrote: »

If we are including vehicles then one of many I have was years back changing the clutch on an old (rear wheel drive) Viva. To do that you had to drop the prop shaft off first. I was working jammed under the car with the barest space to work in (car was on axle stands) and after taking of the 4 nuts from the flange that connected it to universal joint at back of the differential it wasn't moving. It was getting late and I was getting p!ssed off. I squeezed further under the car so I could get right under the prop shaft and get both hands on it. I pulled and pulled until with most of my weight hanging off it I pulled the shaft down on my body and smashed myself in the face with the flange on the universal joint. Big black eye and bruised cheek, very nearly took my eye out. For those that haven't worked on old rear wheel drive cars the prop shaft is a heavy steel tube in this case about 4 inches in diameter and 3ft long.

Got as far as Axel stands and tough to myself at least he can still type using his nose probarbly.

my3cents

Bonzo Delaney wrote: »

Got as far as Axel stands and tough to myself at least he can still type using his nose probarbly.

I still have all my fingers but you have reminded me at about 7 years old I managed to slip with a brand new craft knife and slash the muscle below my thumb about half an inch deep. Lucky it was "only" into the meaty bit. The scar has almost gone, just looking at it now and its only a fine pale inch long line. I can remember when any fortune teller seeing it would have said I wouldn't make it to my tenth birthday . I tried to hide it from my parents but the blood soon gave it away (seem to remember being told not to do what I had just done :rolleyes:), can't remember much more except I didn't have stitches and it healed surprisingly quickly.

antiskeptic

I was a week long resident in the burns unit in St. James, having badly burned my legs whilst carrying out a health and safety survey (I kid you not) on equipment in work.

You could smoke in the TV room in the burns unit in those days and that's were we all hung out, telling each other our respective burns stories ('cept for the ones who were really badly burned and simply lay in their rooms moaning between morphine shots. Oh god, those moans and the relief we all felt when the morphine shot kicked in).

Anyway, foreign lad wanders over to join us for a smoke. He's neck to toe in bandages: body, arms, hands and fingers, legs, feet and toes. But he's not in a jocker.

We ask him his burn story. In halting English he explained that he had a temp job doing grass cutting during that summer. He was filling the petrol lawnmower and managed to splosh petrol all over his jeans. He's working away and begins to notice the petrol is irritating his skin.

So he starts taking off his jeans with a view to mowing trouserless. As he does so, his lighter falls from his pocket, hits the mower gives off a spark. Trousers go up in flames along with the rest of him.

As he is telling us this story, in his broken Ingleeesh, he takes his own cigarette lighter and motions it fast towards the table in front of him to show us the angle it fell at that day, such as to spark. He hits the table with it, the lighter lights up and sets fire to the frayed bandages dressing the tips of his fingers - him then hopping around shouting "Aarrggghh" and waving his hands and fanning things into more flames.


That's a chap to steer a wide berth around in life.

cletus

Ok, not sure if this one counts or not, but here goes.

15 years old, up a step ladder clipping the hedge at the side of the house. I was leaning away from the ladder to try clip a bit more before I had to get down and move along.

The ladder started to lift onto two feet, so I quickly leaned back in to avoid falling. However, I leaned too far and fell headfirst over the top of the ladder.

I put my arm out to break my fall, but I broke my arm instead, then continued to the ground, landing on my head and knocking myself out.

When I came to, my right arm had a 90° bend halfway between my wrist and elbow, and my palm was facing up, but should have been facing down.

To top it all off, I was lying on top of the clipping shears, with the blades running across my stomach. I very nearly eviscerated myself.

Ended up having an operation to put in a plate in my arm.

chillyspoon

listermint wrote: »

doesnt take a note, slight change in your stance can make it bind and presto wham.

done it myself before. Nice crack in the stomach of a piece. Joyful. Thats why i always tell people they are a bloody dangerous machine and should really be used for small repetitive work.

+1.

In my case the classic example of doing the last piece in a set (of 10), a concentration lapse and I'm sure that I either let the workpiece drift a fraction away from the fence or lift slightly.. that's all it takes; kablamo!

antiskeptic

Do we do close but no cigar?

I jumped down from a height of about a metre and a half recently, bending my knees so as to end up in a deep crouch to soften the impact.

The padsaw I had, point upwards, in my front work trouser pocket caught the edge of my tee shirt and ripped a hole in it. Had it caught my belly instead it would have gone in to the hilt.

O'er

Stigura

^^^ Ye get a cigar, just for mentioning " Pad "!

(It's an 'in' joke, from another board )