Thinking of buying a vibator

thesultan

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her. Any women here use them and which ones etc..?

corner of hells

thesultan wrote: »

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her. Any women here use them and which ones etc..?

Stick a picture of her up and we'll recommend one.

greencap

Get her a bus ticket.

MOLF Hunter

Just buy a Duracell battery..stick it up your arse...make a buzzing sound and then she'll open up like a Garda informant.

Smart Bug

It’ll only spark something in her if ye plug it into the mains.

Pero_Bueno

Do they make them for men ?
I might get one and stick it up my arse ... on full power.
Do you reckon they'll notice in the office ?

artanevilla

If it's going up your arse make sure it has a flared base.

pauldavis123

Buy this:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/BodyWand-Original-Plug-Vibrating-Massager/dp/B009D13NJC

No more relationship problems ;-)

Pero_Bueno

This is a good one OP (43s)

Whats a Vibator

BENDYBINN

Johnathan Immense Racket wrote: »

Whats a Vibator

Think he means a de fibyoulator

Sir Oxman

artanevilla wrote: »

If it's going up your arse make sure it has a flared base.

:D:D:D

sjb25

http://www.kappens.in/site/view-product?id=109

Reati

Can't bate an auld Honda!

MOLF Hunter

I'd love to ram that up Mary Lou McDonald's arse!

Feisar

Maybe sit down and have an open and honest chat with her first? Are ya rolling in after pints with the lads expecting the porn star experience?

Sonic Youth

Forget the wife and get a sex doll.

Outlaw Pete

Get an Oculus Go, actually get two... then you can both shag other people while shagging each other.

greencap

Pero_Bueno wrote: »

Do they make them for men ?
I might get one and stick it up my arse ... on full power.
Do you reckon they'll notice in the office ?

another man in the a+e who slipped and fell.

Tilikum17

artanevilla wrote: »

If it's going up your arse make sure it has a flared base.

A man speaking from experience.

up for anything

thesultan wrote: »

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her. Any women here use them and which ones etc..?

You could always up your game in the scratcher, learn a few new techniques and stop boring the hole off her... literally.

Are you one of those chaps who think death by a thousand strokes is the way to go or perhaps you are a rapid vapid? Tell us how you go about it and we can tell you where you're going wrong.

fryup

always remember to close the door when using it

Pero_Bueno

greencap wrote: »

another man in the a+e who slipped and fell.

I remember Ricky Gervais was talking about some doctor he knew that used to hear all sorts of excuses about stuff stuck up guys arseholes.

One lad (that had a bottle of Heinz brown sauce stuck up his hole) said he was locked out of his gaff and was shimmying up the drain pipe to get in an upstairs window and his pants started to slip down and at the same time he fell ... landing on his bag of shopping and the Heinz sauce went up his ass.

The doctor said this story would have been somewhat believable if Tescos sold Heinz sauce with condoms on them

Jim 77

Surprised nobody has suggested using the washing machine during the spin cycle instead.

Phileas Frog

Jim 77 wrote: »

Surprised nobody has suggested using the washing machine during the spin cycle instead.

That'd hardly fit up your ass

Amalgam

Johnathan Immense Racket wrote: »

Whats a Vibator

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VamjepYkpns

NSAman

Please do NOT buy the kick start models. They tend at the least to chip her teeth....

whatdoicare

I think you'd get more out of your money if you booked a weekend away somewhere with a nice spa experience. Wine, dine and pamper your wife and just make her feel loved and everything else will sort itself out.

For women, speaking as one, if stuff aint happening in the bedroom department its because something is missing in the romancing department and no vibrator can fix that!

Good luck in the bedroom x

Wabbit Ears

pauldavis123 wrote: »

Buy this:

https://www.amazon.co.uk/BodyWand-Original-Plug-Vibrating-Massager/dp/B009D13NJC

No more relationship problems ;-)

in all seriousness, these are awesome and she'll love it.

Tom Mann Centuria

Let the greatest ever film help you out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcvgst8qQfI

*deletes search history for Anal Intruder.

The Tetrarch

thesultan wrote: »

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her. Any women here use them and which ones etc..?

Perhaps she worked in construction?
https://uedata.amazon.com/Magvibe-Operated-Vibrator-Concrete-Finishers/dp/B00U7SN732

Ariadne

The wands are amazing, a revelation.


Though this little guy is fantastic and you can use the remote control to increase or decrease the vibrations.



https://www.lovehoney.eu/product.cfm?p=9670

Kevin Finnerty

The Tetrarch wrote: »

Perhaps she worked in construction?
https://uedata.amazon.com/Magvibe-Operated-Vibrator-Concrete-Finishers/dp/B00U7SN732

Maybe she used a whacker?

Wabbit Ears

Succubus_ wrote: »

The wands are amazing, a revelation.


Though this little guy is fantastic and you can use the remote control to increase or decrease the vibrations.



https://www.lovehoney.eu/product.cfm?p=9670

free additional toy with 30 quid spend and code

https://www.lovehoney.eu/offers/

Enter the offer code: BULLET30

PARlance

Feisar wrote: »

Maybe sit down and have an open and honest chat with her first? Are ya rolling in after pints with the lads expecting the porn star experience?

How many lads?

YFlyer

My housemate vibrator is only 6" in length.

RMAOK

Tom Mann Centuria wrote: »

Let the greatest ever film help you out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcvgst8qQfI

*deletes search history for Anal Intruder.

Heard before Val kilmer could be a pain in the arse - well there's the proof...

when you say your sex life is gone to pot, how do you mean? you're not doing it for her anymore? she's not doing it for you, so you're happy to offer a battery operated alternative as a stand in??

I think if there's a problem in the bedroom, this will push you further apart and then it will be impossible to get back on track. One day you'll wake up and wonder what it was like to kiss her, what age are you both if you don't mind my asking?

I'd try sort it and if there's no fixing what cannot be fixed and you've no kids and you're not married, I'd say good luck chuck cos if the chemistry aint there, one of you is just a drunken flirt away from doing the durt as they say!

Hammer89

thesultan wrote: »

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her. Any women here use them and which ones etc..?

If you get in Dealz it will.

suicide_circus

greenspurs

OP - you hardly expected good advice to that question ??

gozunda

Johnathan Immense Racket wrote: »

Whats a Vibator

Normally used to agitate concrete so it sets properly afaik ....

Feisar

Aren't those mains wands as in the ones you plug into a socket supposed to desensitise the clitorous to regular stimulation?

Ariadne

Feisar wrote: »

Aren't those mains wands as in the ones you plug into a socket supposed to desensitise the clitorous to regular stimulation?

They can do. I had to take a break from mine for a while for that reason

MOLF Hunter

Succubus_ wrote: »

They can do. I had to take a break from mine for a while for that reason

You had the bean buzzed off yourself

Feisar

PARlance wrote: »

How many lads?

You'd need two others anyway for air tightness.

SeaFields

suicide_circus wrote: »

That's all well and good but who is going to help him take a p!ss?

Feisar

OP, maybe she likes Pina Coladas?

Hector Savage

Pero_Bueno wrote: »

This is a good one OP (43s)

Ah yes !! my first and only film !!

Massiveguganga

Don’t forget to get lube also, you don’t want to end up like a two stroke engine ran on straight petrol.

thesultan

thesultan wrote: »

Well my sex life is gone to pot and remember her saying before that she used to use one. Should I get her one for Valentines. . Maybe it might spark something in her.

In my experience - direct and through second hand reporting - sex toys are great for augmenting a good sex life. Not for replacing or curing a bad one.

We have a drawer chock full of sex toys and "aids" and it is all good stuff. But they are part of our sex life on occasion - not the focus of it.

That is not to say it will not or can not help your situation - maybe it will - but do not get your hopes up.