Botox in your balls.

JohnnyFlash

I’ve always had a low hanging set of clockweights. Happy enough with my twig and berries in general, but I now find myself back on the ‘dating scene’ as a man in his mid-50’s, and have become slightly self-conscious about my nutpurse losing its fight against gravity and age. Even when you do shave your sac, you can’t say the scrotum is an attractive part of the male anatomy. You don’t want a lady venturing down there and finding out your plums are trying to become friends with your kneecaps.

So I was reading recently that you can now get Botox injected into your porridge pouches. Apparently they tighten up and lose that unattractive wrinkly appearance. The version is called Scrotox. Was wondering if any of the good folk of AH have had the procedure done, and if so, would you recommend it? Was your lover impressed with the taut nature of your bollocks? And if you haven’t, would you consider it?

Not looking for medical advice obviously.

passatman86

I just logd in to say that is the funniest post I ever read on boards

Al_Coholic

Load of bollox

ianob7

"taut nature of your bollocks"

One of best lines I've ever read on boards over the years

AllForIt

No needle is coming anywhere near my scrotum.

Purple Mountain

Are you not saving yourself for your next wife, you fiend of sin?

JohnnyFlash

Purple Mountain wrote: »

Are you not saving yourself for your next wife, you fiend of sin?

Doubt I’ll get married again. One of those is enough for any sane person. No, having great fun sinking the one-eyed purple warrior in wet bosca.

Sam Quentin

Your crazy like a coconut.

Sir Oxman

Low swingers are prized but making friends with your kneecaps...?
inject the pouch

gifted

Never want a needle near my pair.....

Lorelli!

I wouldn't have the balls for that.

wyf437gn6btzue

Don`t think many women your age would care tbh, their t*ts are probably doing the same

Best of luck with your saggy balls

deisedav

True or not that fella is a seriously chap

Purple Mountain

Are you Ross O Carroll Kelly by any chance?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

I’ve always had a low hanging set of clockweights. Happy enough with my twig and berries in general, but I now find myself back on the ‘dating scene’ as a man in his mid-50’s, and have become slightly self-conscious about my nutpurse losing its fight against gravity and age. Even when you do shave your sac, you can’t say the scrotum is an attractive part of the male anatomy. You don’t want a lady venturing down there and finding out your plums are trying to become friends with your kneecaps.

So I was reading recently that you can now get Botox injected into your porridge pouches. Apparently they tighten up and lose that unattractive wrinkly appearance. The version is called Scrotox. Was wondering if any of the good folk of AH have had the procedure done, and if so, would you recommend it? Was your lover impressed with the taut nature of your bollocks? And if you haven’t, would you consider it?

Not looking for medical advice obviously.

You've actually used nine different synonyms for scrotum there.

Stigura

Is your name Barry, OP? Barrys teabags have plastic in them.

limnam

Stigura wrote: »

Is your name Barry, OP? Barrys teabags have plastic in them.

I'd say the last thing this fella should be doing is tea bagging tbh.

Purple Mountain

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

You've actually used nine different synonyms for scrotum there.

That's why I think he's the Rossmeister.

Seth Brundle

Princess Consuela Bananahammock wrote: »

You've actually used nine different synonyms for scrotum there.

Look at you with your big fancy words ya nutbag!

somefeen

For people that love making puns this thread is low hanging fruit

JohnnyFlash

limnam wrote: »

I'd say the last thing this fella should be doing is tea bagging tbh.

No, the chicken skin handbag isn’t designed for that.

2nd Row Donkey

Scrotox

/end thread.

Pero_Bueno

JohhnFlash - never change.

Unfortunately I can't offer you any advice on botox on the oul "Clockweights" - I'd imagine it wouldn't change the hanging nature tho, just will smooth them out.

AMKC

There must be something better than getting a needle stuck in your balls you can do to fix them. Maybe ask a Women to kick them a few times. Not sure if that would help but at least you would have made some women very happy for a while anyway.

JohnnyFlash

AMKC wrote: »

There must be something better than getting a needle stuck in your balls you can do to fix them. Maybe ask a Women to kick them a few times. Not sure if that would help but at least you would have made some women very happy for a while anyway.

Jesus, lot of pent up imagery in that post. Wouldn’t be into any S&M stuff like that. A gallon of porter, then into the leaba for a good ride is way more my scene. Maybe press the ‘devil’s doorbell’ a few times, if you catch my drift....

JohnMc1

Wouldn't you be better off just taking those Testosterone Booster supplements?

oneilla

Are you talking about botox into the scrotum or the testicles? Cause the latter might affect your sperm production.

limnam

oneilla wrote: »

Are you talking about botox into the scrotum or the testicles? Cause the latter might affect your sperm production.

i thought you were Louise O'Neil for a minute.

_Brian

JohnnyFlash wrote: »

I’ve always had a low hanging set of clockweights. Happy enough with my twig and berries in general, but I now find myself back on the ‘dating scene’ as a man in his mid-50’s, and have become slightly self-conscious about my nutpurse losing its fight against gravity and age. Even when you do shave your sac, you can’t say the scrotum is an attractive part of the male anatomy. You don’t want a lady venturing down there and finding out your plums are trying to become friends with your kneecaps.

So I was reading recently that you can now get Botox injected into your porridge pouches. Apparently they tighten up and lose that unattractive wrinkly appearance. The version is called Scrotox. Was wondering if any of the good folk of AH have had the procedure done, and if so, would you recommend it? Was your lover impressed with the taut nature of your bollocks? And if you haven’t, would you consider it?

Not looking for medical advice obviously.

No offence OP but if you get to 50 and the dangle of your bollox is the big issue you see with starting a new relationship then I’d worry about your long term happiness.

JohnnyFlash

oneilla wrote: »

Are you talking about botox into the scrotum or the testicles? Cause the latter might affect your sperm production.

Oh Jesus, just into the hairy knap sack and no further. Don’t want to be injecting a strain of botulism into the jizz factory itself. No Sir! Even though I had the snip a few years ago so my trouser gravy is harmless anyway.

elstingeo

Hey OP...

I know I may get slated for this seeing as it's After Hours and all that....

This isn't medical advice. Just one bloke chatting to another... If you are really concerned about how low your "clock weights" hang, ask your doctor... I had a similar problem and I'm a few decades younger than you, it turned out to be harmless... But still... Also apparently such things are part of the aging process....

Personally, I wouldn't bother getting Botox injected in to such an area as the effects of Botox are temporary and do not usually yield a permanent result as far as I can remember regarding the results of Botox based upon general knowledge..

What I would say to you is this; if a potential new partner cannot accept your anatomical features for the way they are then it sounds like an unnecessary stressor... If you are personally uncomfortable about the aesthetic looks of your "clock weights", then maybe accept that this happens to a large majority of men as they age.. Best of luck getting back in to the dating scene..