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Kissed friends partner on her lips?!

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  • 01-04-2018 5:55pm
    #1
    Happyrabbit
    Registered Users Posts: 50 ✭✭


    I was at the wedding with my boyfriend. We went out for 4 months. Before we arrived at the wedding. He told me he is very fond of one of his bestfriend’s partner. Let’s call her Laura. I was excited to see these good people in his life.

    I met friends, they are lovely and fun people. In fact, I really like Laura, beautiful and friendly girl. I was sitting between Laura and himself, he leaned over and kissed her on her lips in front of me. He hugged her and kissed her on her head and cheeks many times during the night but it didn’t bother me as they are good friends but when he kissed her lips. I was like wow, that’s not something friends would do but I didn’t react at all and let him enjoy the rest of the evening. Next day when we drove back from the wedding. I told him what he did the night before was very inappropriate and I felt very uncomfortable. He apologied but I started to think differently of him,and I don’t feel like to meet him again anytime soon. I just need some space to think over. Respect and trust are very important to me, am I over reacting?


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    #2
    jimbobalob309
    Closed Accounts Posts: 50 ✭✭jimbobalob309


    Do they have a dating history?


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    #3
    Seve OB
    Registered Users Posts: 15,851 ✭✭✭✭Seve OB


    Happyrabbit wrote: »
    am I over reacted?

    Yes


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    #4
    helimachoptor
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 21,644 Mod ✭✭✭✭helimachoptor


    What does her boyfriend/his friend say about kissing on the lips?


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    #5
    LoMismo
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 63 ✭✭LoMismo


    Utterly bizarre behaviour on his part, right in front of his girlfriend. I'd be p*ssed off too. I can't say if he fancies her but I don't think you're overreacting.


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    #6
    Happyrabbit
    Registered Users Posts: 50 ✭✭Happyrabbit


    jimbobalob309 wrote: »
    Do they have a dating history?

    They don’t have a dating history. They met two years ago and became good friends.


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    #7
    Happyrabbit
    Registered Users Posts: 50 ✭✭Happyrabbit


    helimachoptor wrote: »
    What does her boyfriend/his friend say about kissing on the lips?

    Her boyfriend wasn’t happy when he heard. He asked my boyfriend he kissed his girlfriend and my boyfriend said nothing happened. I didn’t want to get involved.


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    #8
    Stellasmurf
    Registered Users Posts: 139 ✭✭Stellasmurf


    Was he drunk?


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    #9
    Katgurl
    Registered Users Posts: 2,143 ✭✭✭Katgurl


    I would not be happy and don't think you are overreacting. It is disrespectful at the very least.

    You're not with him very long. If you don't want to see him again I wouldn't bother.


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    #10
    qwerty13
    Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭qwerty13


    Before I comment on your situation OP, I just wanted to say that a friend of mine told me that her family all kiss each other on the lips. I find that really really weird tbh.

    If your BF is like my friends family, well maybe that’s what he thinks people normally do. however, ever though you’ve only only been going out together for a short time, his behaviour with ‘Laura’ came as a surprise to you - so the question is, does he kiss family/good friends on the lips, or just her?

    For me, if he kisses family/good friends on the lips, it’s still weird. But if he doesn’t do that, and singles out his best friends GF to kiss on the lips - even weirder! I think it’s really odd behaviour, and I would not be at all comfortable with it


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    #11
    suicide_circus
    Registered Users Posts: 19,802 ✭✭✭✭suicide_circus


    Kissing on the lips is an intimate act. Whatever about the very questionable practice some people go in for of kissing family on the lips (yuk), kissing a beautiful girl on the lips in front of ones girlfriend either makes him extremely insensitive or a moron.


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    #12
    Pawwed Rig
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Home & Garden Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators Posts: 22,314 CMod ✭✭✭✭Pawwed Rig


    suicide_circus wrote: »
    Kissing on the lips is an intimate act. Whatever about the very questionable practice some people go in for of kissing family on the lips (yuk), kissing a beautiful girl on the lips in front of ones girlfriend either makes him extremely insensitive or a moron.

    I kiss my wife, son and daughter everyday. Why is it 'yuk'??


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    #13
    Rachiee
    Registered Users Posts: 880 ✭✭✭Rachiee


    I kiss one of my close male friends on the lips rarely it is in no way romantic, he obviously didnt think it romantic either to kiss her as if he did he wouldn't have done it right infront of you, that being said I think it is really disrespectful to you and insensitive to your feelings so yeah it is a bit of a weird thing to do but does happen but bigger issue is respect and making you feel valued in his company.


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    #14
    suicide_circus
    Registered Users Posts: 19,802 ✭✭✭✭suicide_circus


    Pawwed Rig wrote: »
    I kiss my wife, son and daughter everyday. Why is it 'yuk'??
    For me, kissing on the lips is reserved for lovers. It's just how I was raised I guess.


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    #15
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    He also leaned across his own girlfriend to hug and kiss his "good female friend". Several times. That's not how platonic friends behave and don't let him try to convince you of that.


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    #16
    thierry14
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,480 ✭✭✭thierry14


    Sound like he'd ride her all night if given the chance


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    #17
    Teyla Emmagan
    Registered Users Posts: 5,641 ✭✭✭Teyla Emmagan


    Pawwed Rig wrote:
    I kiss my wife, son and daughter everyday. Why is it 'yuk'??

    On the lips? The lips for me is just for sexual kissing.


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    #18
    FizzleSticks
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭FizzleSticks


    This post has been deleted.


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    #19
    DontThankMe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 732 ✭✭✭DontThankMe


    Don't think you're over reacting OP I'd find that very weird tbh. If he's done it with her how do you know he hasn't done it with other women he has a "special" relationship with.


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    #20
    Colser
    Registered Users Posts: 5,572 ✭✭✭Colser


    Ursus Horribilis wrote: »
    He also leaned across his own girlfriend to hug and kiss his "good female friend". Several times. That's not how platonic friends behave and don't let him try to convince you of that.

    He sounds like an a**hole and his friend sounds as bad going along with that ****e in front of you..how dare they treat you like that and no it definitely isn't normal.
    I'd probably have walked out TBH.


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    #21
    splinter65
    Registered Users Posts: 9,420 ✭✭✭splinter65


    You’re not overreacting . Forget about him.


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    #22
    C3PO
    Registered Users Posts: 3,746 ✭✭✭C3PO


    I have a number of good "girlfriends" that I regularly kiss lightly and briefly on the lips! Some of them are the partners of my own friends. There is nothing sexual about it!


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    #23
    Katgurl
    Registered Users Posts: 2,143 ✭✭✭Katgurl


    C3PO wrote: »
    I have a number of good "girlfriends" that I regularly kiss lightly and briefly on the lips! Some of them are the partners of my own friends. There is nothing sexual about it!

    Well would you kiss your male friends on the lips?


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    #24
    LoMismo
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 63 ✭✭LoMismo


    Rachiee wrote: »
    I kiss one of my close male friends on the lips rarely it is in no way romantic, he obviously didnt think it romantic either to kiss her as if he did he wouldn't have done it right infront of you, that being said I think it is really disrespectful to you and insensitive to your feelings so yeah it is a bit of a weird thing to do but does happen but bigger issue is respect and making you feel valued in his company.

    That is really weird, by my standards anyway. How stupid do people have to be to think this may not bother your partner? Common sense ffs.


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    #25
    C3PO
    Registered Users Posts: 3,746 ✭✭✭C3PO


    Katgurl wrote: »
    Well would you kiss your male friends on the lips?

    It has been known to happen ... there would usually be drink involved! :)


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    #26
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    Colser wrote: »
    He sounds like an a**hole and his friend sounds as bad going along with that ****e in front of you..how dare they treat you like that and no it definitely isn't normal.
    I'd probably have walked out TBH.

    True, but I think them being at a wedding probably stopped that happening. Nobody's going to want to start a row when sitting at a table with other people around.


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    #27
    C3PO
    Registered Users Posts: 3,746 ✭✭✭C3PO


    C3PO wrote: »
    I have a number of good "girlfriends" that I regularly kiss lightly and briefly on the lips! Some of them are the partners of my own friends. There is nothing sexual about it!

    .... and now that I think about it ... my own partner kisses our male friends briefly on the lips when we meet ... I had never thought that there was anything strange about it ... maybe I should? ;)

    I personally think that you're overreacting OP!


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    #28
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    Would you be OK with your partner frequently leaning across you to hug and kiss these friends at a wedding though?


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    #29
    Colser
    Registered Users Posts: 5,572 ✭✭✭Colser


    Ursus Horribilis wrote: »
    True, but I think them being at a wedding probably stopped that happening. Nobody's going to want to start a row when sitting at a table with other people around.

    I wouldn't cause a row,probably just say I felt sick and was leaving and tbh I genuinely would feel upset a sick in that situation..I just think it sounds like a flirty thing going on and both showing no consideration for the OP's feelings.


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    #30
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    Maybe. It was such an odd thing to happen, most people would probably just sit in their chair and seethe. Regardless, I'm not sure I'd want to continue in a relationship with someone who did that to me. It'd be a dealbreaker for me but perhaps it isn't for the OP. Ultimately it's her relationship and her decision to make.


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    #31
    Mr. Incognito
    Registered Users Posts: 9,798 ✭✭✭Mr. Incognito


    Its obvious platonic

    I see nothing wrong with it

    I kiss female friends on the lips by way of greeting.

    Ive kissed male friends on the lips as piss takes

    People are so weird about affection. You need to work on your insecurities


This discussion has been closed.
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