Questions for the boys of AH. (Chapettes also welcome)

bubbles o hara

My husband and I (always wanted to say that :pac:) have just had a long chat about the PC world in which we live. Now I would love to get the opinions of the good folks of AH.

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?


Honestly, it saddened me that we've come to this. But AH folks, please give your opinion...and be honest.

One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry.

stimpson

I didn’t read all your post, but I wouldn’t recommend PC World. They tend to be overpriced. I tend to buy most of my kit online. Amazon have free delivery and a great returns policy.

donegaLroad

what age are these guys and where are they socializing? There are a lot of variables to consider here.

everlast75

stimpson wrote: »

I didn’t read all your post, but I wouldn’t recommend PC World. They tend to be overpriced. I tend to buy most of my kit online. Amazon have free delivery and a great returns policy.

Where in the world?

Birneybau

Curly Pieces

Chancer3001

"One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry. "

OH GOD PLEEEEEEEASE TELL US YOUR OPINION. THE SUSPENSE IS KILLLLLLLLLING ME

The Rape of Lucretia

Until recently, I used to think getting one's legal people to approach, through an intermediary, a woman's legal team, for exploratory talks about terms and conditions for a possible discussion about going on a date, was a reasonably non offensive way to show interest in a woman and explore possible reciprocal interest.

No longer. I have realised that this is gross harassment and offensive to women, and regret my former behaviour.
The days of men and women going on dates or having relationships of any sort are a thing of the past now.

One eyed Jack

OP when you said the PC world in which you live, I thought this thread was going to be something along the lines of how some men are so taken up with technology they don't know how to talk to women any more. Then I copped - Political Correctness! :pac:


Nah, I'd say they're exaggerating the problem tbh. A lot of people I know now both guys and girls are just taking the piss out of the metoo hashtag thing, couldn't give a damn about what happens in Hollywood, and are just as easily able to chat, flirt, have a laugh with each other as much now as they ever did before.

Tell your husband and his mates not to be behaving like Chicken Lickens :pac:

Ulysses Gaze

bubbles o hara wrote: »

My husband and I (always wanted to say that :pac:) have just had a long chat about the PC world in which we live. Now I would love to get the opinions of the good folks of AH.

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?


Honestly, it saddened me that we've come to this. But AH folks, please give your opinion...and be honest.

One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry.

Have a consent form printed out and a notary at hand.

That should do the trick.

Lia_lia

First I thought this post was about PC world the shop and then I thought it was about everyone being stuck on their computers all the time and how the internet rules the world (pc world). And that led me to think you were talking about men that had bad social skills with women due to the fact that they are on their computers all the time.

Didn’t occur to me that you meant politically correct until I read the responses.

cantdecide

One day I accidentally used the word c*** (lightheartedly referring to myself - "now he thinks I'm a c***) in a one to one conversation with a female colleague. It just kind of slipped out. The bloody histrionics and arms flailing. I literally thought I was facing disciplinary. It was a horrible feeling.

Mardy Bum

bubbles o hara wrote: »

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?
.

Those men are idiots.

Tom Mann Centuria

cantdecide wrote: »

One day I accidentally used the word c*** (lightheartedly referring to myself - "now he thinks I'm a c***) in a one to one conversation with a female colleague. It just kind of slipped out. The bloody histrionics and arms flailing. I literally thought I was facing disciplinary. It was a horrible feeling.

Saying c*** is one thing, letting "it" slip out is quite another. Zip up your fly next time.

cantdecide

bubbles o hara wrote: »

One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry.

Ladies first.

Irish Guitarist

Here's silver tongued devil Serge Gainsbourg demonstrating how to talk to the fairer sex.

Richard Hillman

There is literally no way of asking a lady out without threading on the thin ice of offense. Leave them be, not worth the hassle.

mzungu

bubbles o hara wrote: »

My husband and I (always wanted to say that :pac:) have just had a long chat about the PC world in which we live. Now I would love to get the opinions of the good folks of AH.

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?


Honestly, it saddened me that we've come to this. But AH folks, please give your opinion...and be honest.

One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry.

They are overthinking things. Use basic rules of etiquette, as you would in all human interactions and there wont be any problem.

riffmongous

bubbles o hara wrote: »

My husband and I (always wanted to say that :pac:) have just had a long chat about the PC world in which we live. Now I would love to get the opinions of the good folks of AH.

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?


Honestly, it saddened me that we've come to this. But AH folks, please give your opinion...and be honest.

One warning! If you ask for my opinion, you might be sorry.

Is your husband a primary school teacher?

bubbles o hara

bubbles o hara wrote: »

In hubby's workplace today the lads were chatting, and all agreed that they now have no idea how to behave in the company of women. They feel they can't compliment a woman, they're wary of using a word that is now considered inappropriate. How do they approach a woman to ask them for a date? What words can you use without offending?
.

No Idea... but TBH I'll likely behave the way I've always behaved. It's not as if I've suddenly turned into a rapist, or slobbering sexist since the PC brigade took over. I will admit I'm hesitant about dating since I returned to Ireland, but I've never been much into dating here, so no big change there either...

I have a friend who swears by the plain and simple "would you like to f**k?" . Sure it gets the odd severe rebuke, but he lets them know his intentions straight away, it's neither cajoling them not cornering them, it's direct and simple.

For Forks Sake

cantdecide wrote: »

One day I accidentally used the word c*** (lightheartedly referring to myself - "now he thinks I'm a c***) in a one to one conversation with a female colleague. It just kind of slipped out. The bloody histrionics and arms flailing. I literally thought I was facing disciplinary. It was a horrible feeling.

Artists impression

wakka12

Yeh all the PC stuff on the news can be quite annoying but the reality is if you're a guy trying to get a girl as long as you're polite and not over bearing then she'll more than likely be polite back even if she's not interested.
No matter how much harvey weinstein is on TV being accused nothings ever going to happen you for politely asking a girl for a drink or whatever it may be

cantdecide

For Forks Sake wrote: »

Artists impression

Yup. That was pretty much it.

qwerty ui op

bubbles o hara wrote: »

Honestly, it saddened me that we've come to this..

Hee Haww cried Bob the ****ing the donkey

bubbles o hara

Well hasn't my wrist been slapped hard!

For what it's worth, the lads (is that offensive now?)I mentioned earlier include married with children, single, seeking, divorced and the rest.

They're not neanderthals and their knuckles don't scrape along the ground as they attempt to walk upright. But being bombarded with what is now considered offensive or misogynistic, they are curious..and yes, concerned about what is and is not allowed.

Sorry for assuming AH was the place to ask the questions. Jaysus knows, I don't want to offend anybody.

Mods, if I've triggered a bad reaction, please remove my offensive post. Thanks.

LadyMacBeth_

Approach a group of ladies and say "hey ladies, anyone DTF?"

johnnyskeleton

bubbles o hara wrote: »

But being bombarded with what is now considered offensive or misogynistic, they are curious..and yes, concerned about what is and is not allowed.

Nothing has changed really. You can ask a girl out no bother but dont send an unsolicited picture of your genitals. Same as it was in Jane Austins time.

Everyone should just go on as usual and stop worrying about what is and isn't considered PC, because most of it is manufactured by the few to worry the many.

scudzilla

If you see a lady with nice tits then you really should say something, "Nice tits", actually, maybe use the word breast in case tits offends her, if she can't take the compliment then it's her who has the issue.

hatrickpatrick

To be honest, I go for uninhibited, extroverted, filthy-minded-and-proud-of-it types to begin with, so if someone is the type to get offended rather than firing back with something cheeky she's just not the woman for me anyway. So it just doesn't bother me, apart from finding it utterly ridiculous how our society makes sexuality into such a monstrously big deal that so many people feel they have to tiptoe around instead of being overt about it. I'm into the type who refuses to do that to begin with, so it's not ultimately going to have much impact on my own life.

NollagShona

Swipe right

listermint

In a rush to make everything pc non pc people have just started using Mac's, even iPads .


Frankly it's getting ridiculous

Tom Mann Centuria

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

Nothing has changed really. You can ask a girl out no bother but dont send an unsolicited picture of your genitals. Same as it was in Jane Austins time.

Steve Austin's sister?

riffmongous

Tom Mann Centuria wrote: »

Steve Austin's sister.

What?

Purple Mountain

cantdecide wrote: »

One day I accidentally used the word c*** (lightheartedly referring to myself - "now he thinks I'm a c***) in a one to one conversation with a female colleague. It just kind of slipped out. The bloody histrionics and arms flailing. I literally thought I was facing disciplinary. It was a horrible feeling.

I'm from rural Ireland.
That word was always used harmlessly round these parts by farmer folk.
Eg. I've had a c**t of a day.
It was part of the country vernacular and no one took offence to it. I still don't and sometimes if I'm in a really bad mood and someone gets under my skin, I'll refer to them (male or female) as a f**king c**t but not to their face mind!

Tom Mann Centuria

riffmongous wrote: »

What?

My mistake, presume the poster meant the author.

Of such titles as Betty Alden: The First Born Daughter of the Pilgrims and Dora Darling: The Daughter of the Regiment. Classics I've no doubt.

Jurgen Klopp

All this worry comes from taking rubbish they see on the net too seriously.

99.9% of women I know and have met in real life aren't hysterical like a lot of the fruit loops you see online, same as 99% of the men a woman will encounter are grand compared to the rapist around every corner the media and social media regurgitate

Now I'm putting aside the genuine stuff about Weinstein that came out. But places like Twitter are an annual AGM for the nut cases and oddballs of every town and village the world over.

There's only a small amount of them and most people will hardly ever encounter one in real life but when they can all come together on such an easy to access platform the minority make so much noise you'd think it was mainstream. You get papers making articles out of such using the posts of only a couple dozen people the world over and making it look like an epidemic

Jurgen Klopp

cantdecide wrote: »

One day I accidentally used the word c*** (lightheartedly referring to myself - "now he thinks I'm a c***) in a one to one conversation with a female colleague. It just kind of slipped out. The bloody histrionics and arms flailing. I literally thought I was facing disciplinary. It was a horrible feeling.

**** has always been as casual a swear word here in Ireland and across the pond in the UK as saying feck, fcuk, etc and I've heard and used it to refer to men and women in equal amounts

Americans for some reason seem to think your after pulling on your KKK robes in a black neighborhood when you say it tho, I don't know what the story is.

Even worse, an Irish person who watches too much American TV or spends a few months there getting all hauty despite hearing it all their life here

C*nt is absolutely one of the most satisfying words to say.

Jurgen Klopp

[Deleted User] wrote: »

C*nt is absolutely one of the most satisfying words to say.

Your a ****, I'm a ****, we're all *****!

cantdecide

Deleted User wrote: »

C*nt is absolutely one of the most satisfying words to say.

The Aussies are masterful with the word.

Jurgen Klopp wrote: »

**** has always been as casual a swear word here in Ireland

Well after a rocky beginning, we got to know each other quite well and you'll never guess what - under it all she was ... an uptight, insecure, treacherous, perma-ffended munchkin. I get a shiver down my spine thinking about her. You might even say my faux pas wasn't the only c*** in my story.

ArchXStanton

Meh time for lads in this age of equality to sit back and let the ladies do some of the grunt work...

riffmongous

Tom Mann Centuria wrote: »

My mistake, presume the poster meant the author.

Of such titles as Betty Alden: The First Born Daughter of the Pilgrims and Dora Darling: The Daughter of the Regiment. Classics I've no doubt.

Tom Mann Centuria

riffmongous wrote: »

and that's the bottom line.........

He's only the 2nd best Steve Austin.

riffmongous

Tom Mann Centuria wrote: »

He's only the 2nd best Steve Austin.

Needs the sound effect

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-G0SVEQW8A

Donald Trump

hatrickpatrick wrote: »

To be honest, I go for uninhibited, extroverted, filthy-minded-and-proud-of-it types to begin with

Well I'll tell you one thing for nothing - ya didn't lick that off a stone.

The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree

Like father like son so they say

hatrickpatrick

Donald Trump wrote: »

Well I'll tell you one thing for nothing - ya didn't lick that off a stone.

The apple doesn't fall too far from the tree

Like father like son so they say

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Your username makes this absolutely perfect

DEFTLEFTHAND

Chapette, I like that word.

Is it similar to ladette? Women who drink pints of lager, smoke rollies and curse like sailors.

hatrickpatrick

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Chapette, I like that word.

Is it similar to ladette? Women who drink pints of lager, smoke rollies and curse like sailors.

Wouldn't "Chapette" be the opposite then - men who go to bottomless prosecco brunches, watch Gossip Girl and Made In Chelsea, and take hundreds of selfies in the jacks on nights out? :pac:

andekwarhola

Presumably by compliment, you mean complimenting a woman's appearance. Why would anybody feel the need to do that in the workplace unless they're creeping on them?

GingerLily

andekwarhola wrote: »

Presumably by compliment, you mean complimenting a woman's appearance. Why would anybody feel the need to do that in the workplace unless they're creeping on them?

Exactly, ask them out on a date or for a coffee and if she accepts then on the date it is appropriate to compliment her, but it's not really appropriate in the office unless it's new haircut etc.