Now Ye're Talking - to an adult diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

Boards.ie: Niamh

Our next AMA guest is a young woman with ASD (Autistic Spectrum Disorder). She was diagnosed at the age of 15 and she welcomes any of your questions about ASD and what's it like to live with it. Without further ado, fire away with your questions!

mizzieh

Hi what would your advice be when choosing a secondary school for a boy with high functioning autism? Thanks

rtron

What's the one thing that helps communicate better with children with asd. (I'm sure there are loads) But from your perspective.
Thanks for doing this.

endacl

Have you watched Atypical on Netflix, and, if so, what did you make of its representation of life from the perspective of a young person with a diagnosis of ASD?

PTH2009

What kind of jobs do/did you work ???

I have slight Aspergers and work in retail for the last 9 years. I generally get on fine but panic a bit when a few things are wrong such as if the work area is crowded, items are missing or area is untidy, very loud noise or people etc. I come off as rude sometimes cause of this, did u ever have issues like that ???

Here we go

Is there a difference in autism carateristics in girls/women compared to boys/men

What type of careers do you think is best for people with social issues to explorer

What advice would you give to kids growing up to make friends or relationships as they get older

Sorry if there's to much there the last two are really my main concerns for my son growing up to be happy have friends and meet someone to love

doolox

In my case I was not diagnosed with high functioning autism until the age of 52, 7 years ago.

Many unusual aspects of my life became more explainable once I got my diagnosis and and the realisation that most of the rest of the world think and operate differently to me.

Like referred to in an earlier post I also cannot tolerate chaos or loud confrontational scenarios and do not perform at all well in stressful situations.

My first 2 jobs were in technical roles in large multinationals which became harder to do as change in these sectors accelerated and the work became less routine and more fluid, dynamic and demanding. My aversion to taking on any supervisory or management role, due to my reluctance to handle any form of adversarial interpersonal tasks in my work, telling people bad news, handling disciplinary issues or handling workplace conflict wisely and with an even temper meant that I was stuck in a junior role for far too long and not able to progress or grow as a person in my job.

I took redundancy in 2007 and lost another job in 2009 and got diagnosed in 2010 after a friend of my wife recognised the signs of autism which were similar but not as severe as the signs happening to her son.

While the diagnosis has affected me somewhat I find it good to have an awareness of the condition and being able to seek assistance from professionals in order to get on with my life and get on with my wife and two daughters.

I feel that if I had an earlier diagnosis my troubled and chequered education and work experience might have been better managed, both by myself and with others who had to deal with me. Now I actively seek out and try to put to good use any feedback I can get so as to avoid misunderstandings or bad quality in my work or causing hurt and anguish in my home life.

Here we go

Is there a difference in autism carateristics in girls/women compared to boys/men

What type of careers do you think is best for people with social issues to explorer

What advice would you give to kids growing up to make friends or relationships as they get older

Sorry if there's to much there the last two are really my main concerns for my son growing up to be happy have friends and meet someone to love

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

mizzieh wrote: »

Hi what would your advice be when choosing a secondary school for a boy with high functioning autism? Thanks

Hi there, thanks for your question

That's a really difficult question, my first piece of advice is to go and see a few places and see what they're like, bring your boy along too so he can see what each place is like (depending on your location of course). If possible arrange for your boy to spend a few hours there (if not to anxiety-producing for him)

my 2nd piece of advice is beforehand to think of any questions you might want to ask, or he might want to know and write them down, as in the moment we can forget things, as I am very guilty of doing

my 3rd piece of advice is to choose between a normal school with support or a special school with support, the answer will depend on your boy and how much support he needs etc

4thly consider the size of the school and classrooms, again it will depend on how much support is needed and noise levels

and lastly consider transport, (wether by car, bus, walk etc)

A school that has a special place if he needs a break/needs to de-stress would be good but again it depends on your location

I know it's a hard decision to make but I wish you the best of luck

Annasopra

Boards.ie: Niamh wrote: »

Our next AMA guest is a young woman with ASD. She was diagnosed at the age of 15 and she welcomes any of your questions about ASD and what's it like to live with it. Without further ado, fire away with your questions!

ASD?

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

rtron wrote: »

What's the one thing that helps communicate better with children with asd. (I'm sure there are loads) But from your perspective.
Thanks for doing this.

Hi there thanks for your question

There's quite a few but from my perspective, it would be using pictures, easy to use and widely understood

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

endacl wrote: »

Have you watched Atypical on Netflix, and, if so, what did you make of its representation of life from the perspective of a young person with a diagnosis of ASD?

I haven't yet no, it's on my ever-growing 'to watch' list though

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

PTH2009 wrote: »

What kind of jobs do/did you work ???

I have slight Aspergers and work in retail for the last 9 years. I generally get on fine but panic a bit when a few things are wrong such as if the work area is crowded, items are missing or area is untidy, very loud noise or people etc. I come off as rude sometimes cause of this, did u ever have issues like that ???

No I am unemployed, just started in a long-term service for adults with ASD 2 weeks ago now. Going well so far though it's a big change In my college years (which I'm recently finished) I did a couple of work placements, mostly in IT/secretarial work. Yeah I found my work placements hard going with loud noises/being in a crowded room etc

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

I'm getting dinner here (I live independently) so will be back to answer the rest of the questions later. Interesting ones so far

LadyMacBeth_

Hi there, thank you very much for doing this AMA!

I was just wondering what you think is the biggest misconception that society has about people with ASD?

I have read that girls with ASD aren't as easily diagnosed as they are better able to mask their communication issues, do you think this is true?

fmpisces

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

ASD?

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

Wanderer78

just been diagnosed with aspergers and add, any advice?

evolving_doors

Do you suffer from insomnia?
Do you like any particular type of music or a specific piece?

RobbingBandit

Do you tell many people you come in contact with of your diagnosis?

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

god I needed that back to the questions:

yeah there are some subtle differences, females with the condition tend to be diagnosed later in life as they mask their characteries by copying peers, and often develop interests in literature and music, whereas males tend to be diagnosed earlier

in terms of jobs and work try to work to the person's strengths/interests but a few examples would be computer programming, photography, commercial art or an animal trainer etc

In terms of friendships and relationships, my advice would be join clubs around your interests, online communities, and in school a system could be set up where one person 'buddys' another, and could form friends. For me making friends and relationships has always been the hardest part of my condition, it's taken me a long time but I finally have a few friends and a relationship

hope this helps

Here we go wrote: »

Is there a difference in autism carateristics in girls/women compared to boys/men

What type of careers do you think is best for people with social issues to explorer

What advice would you give to kids growing up to make friends or relationships as they get older

Sorry if there's to much there the last two are really my main concerns for my son growing up to be happy have friends and meet someone to love

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

doolox wrote: »

In my case I was not diagnosed with high functioning autism until the age of 52, 7 years ago.

Many unusual aspects of my life became more explainable once I got my diagnosis and and the realisation that most of the rest of the world think and operate differently to me.

Like referred to in an earlier post I also cannot tolerate chaos or loud confrontational scenarios and do not perform at all well in stressful situations.

My first 2 jobs were in technical roles in large multinationals which became harder to do as change in these sectors accelerated and the work became less routine and more fluid, dynamic and demanding. My aversion to taking on any supervisory or management role, due to my reluctance to handle any form of adversarial interpersonal tasks in my work, telling people bad news, handling disciplinary issues or handling workplace conflict wisely and with an even temper meant that I was stuck in a junior role for far too long and not able to progress or grow as a person in my job.

I took redundancy in 2007 and lost another job in 2009 and got diagnosed in 2010 after a friend of my wife recognised the signs of autism which were similar but not as severe as the signs happening to her son.

While the diagnosis has affected me somewhat I find it good to have an awareness of the condition and being able to seek assistance from professionals in order to get on with my life and get on with my wife and two daughters.

I feel that if I had an earlier diagnosis my troubled and chequered education and work experience might have been better managed, both by myself and with others who had to deal with me. Now I actively seek out and try to put to good use any feedback I can get so as to avoid misunderstandings or bad quality in my work or causing hurt and anguish in my home life.

Hi there thanks for sharing your story

I knew that it was different from a young age (but didn't know what it was) as things didn't come naturally to me (things like socialising, tying my shoelaces and the noise in the playground in school was overwhelming), this continued on (with different challenges along the way) until when I was 15. A speech therapist in the school i was in noticed my traits and sent me to Dublin to be assessed for AS (Asperger's Syndrome) where I got my diagnosis (to make a long story short!)

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

Joeytheparrot wrote: »

ASD?

Autism Spectrum Disorder I have Asperger's Syndrome (AS)

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

LadyMacBeth_ wrote: »

Hi there, thank you very much for doing this AMA!

I was just wondering what you think is the biggest misconception that society has about people with ASD?

I have read that girls with ASD aren't as easily diagnosed as they are better able to mask their communication issues, do you think this is true?

Hi there thanks for asking your question

I think the biggest one is that people with ASD don't understand other people's emotions..but we do..although it make take us longer to understand it than people without ASD

I do think it's true yeah, I know a handful of other females like myself who weren't diagnosed easily

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

Wanderer78 wrote: »

just been diagnosed with aspergers and add, any advice?

congrats on your diagnosis:) here are some pointers:

-take one day at a time, getting a diagnosis can be a shock and can take time to get your head around
-research yourself on the condition, for the first 6 months of being diagnosed i poured myself into reading all I could on AS
-the subject of whether or not to tell people about the diagnosis is a personal one and up to you and family but it can make life easier if you do (for appointments etc)

evolving_doors wrote: »

Do you suffer from insomnia?

Do you like any particular type of music or a specific piece?

Oh god yes, I do, I'm often awake in the small hours

I like rock and pop music

RobbingBandit wrote: »

Do you tell many people you come in contact with of your diagnosis?

I would tell most people yes, it makes life easier and the interaction easier as they generally understand

never_mind

I hear that certain people with ASD can be incredibly bright and can obsess over particular topics - is this the case with you?

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA

never_mind wrote: »

I hear that certain people with ASD can be incredibly bright and can obsess over particular topics - is this the case with you?

in a way yes, I am very bright, but I don't generally obsess over things, however I do have big interests in things (such as music, computers, and writing)

m'lady

Hi Op, I firstly would like to say thank you for doing this, I have such an interest in ASD and have worked with people with it (along with many other things) but I won't pretend to know a lot about it!

I would like to ask you, what is the main issue, if any you feel you have come up against in society?
Also you mentioned you are in a relationship- how soon after meeting that person did you tell them you had ASD? (I apologise If that's too personal and you don't wish to answer).
Thanks again

mahamageehad

Do you think mainstream media sometimes romanticizes Aspergers? I'm thinking of the TV shows/movies where a character is emotionally shut off but a genius and he/she eventually saves the day. We rarely hear about the people in the middles, just those on the top and end of the spectrum. If so, you you feel it puts more pressure on you to fill that "genius" role? Do you see characters like that as role models or a hindrance or neither?

Goat the dote

Hi there,
I reckon I have undiagnosed ASD, for several reasons, and my son also has diagnosed asd,ADHD and odd.
Do you feel "vindicated"/liberated by the diagnosis. As in, do you feel it explains a lot about yourself?

ELM327

Thanks for doing this AMA. As an adult with high functioning Asberger's and social anxiety (amongst other anxieties) it's great to see more visibility given to this topic.

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA wrote: »

I haven't yet no, it's on my ever-growing 'to watch' list though

It's a really good drama series, it portrays very well (imo) the difficulties endured by those of us "on the spectrum", although the character is at the more extreme end of the spectrum to myself. There was also a great program on RTE the other night - might still be on the player - showing a few young adults. I'll admit that I was in tears watching it and am tearing up now thinking of it. One of the other traits I have is a complete lack of empathy unless I relate to the situation - if that happens I get a feeling of complete overpowering.

My question is I suppose a general one, how do you deal with people who you need to deal with professionally, if at the time you don't feel up to /comfortable with discussing ASD? I work in an area where some of clients would be of an older generation and I don't necessrily want to explain my ASD to them but it's difficult sometimes if a meeting is in a loud busy coffee shop for instance.

I'm lucky that -when not off site - my team is very accommodating and are aware of my quirks and in particular, missed social cues and lack of intonation. I'm also lucky to have a partner who is very understanding and has helped me greatly on my journey.

Thanks again for doing this AMA , and best of luck for the future.

HairyCabbage

I'm an adult with ASD, AMA wrote: »

No I am unemployed, just started in a long-term service for adults with ASD 2 weeks ago now.

What do you mean by long-term service? I am diagnosed with dyspraxia and highly suspect that I have undiagnosed ADHD and ASD though there is a lot of overlap in symptoms between all 3 so who knows!