what's the weirdest thing you have brought home from a night out

Johnnio13

A cops hat in Montauk on J1 after it came off during a bar fight.
Mobile twist off car aerials. dozens of them one night. On the drunken walk from Baggot street to Milltown. Funny at the time.
Mate brought a mini digger home one night. Tried to drive it in the front door. wouldn't fit. So left it in the neighbours drive.

partyguinness

Managed to wrestle home a bus stop sign as in the full 10-11 foot job...

The front badge off a Mercedes which I was genuinely mortified about afterwards. I honestly did not expect it to break off so easy as they are usually tied down with metal cable but not this car....it was 20 years ago...

partyguinness

I have brought back a few absolute munters from nightclubs in my time if that counts...they looked like Cameron Diaz in the club but under the harsh unforgiving fluorescent lights of the home kitchen they melted into Dogzilla.

Village Crazy Lady

mosesgun wrote: »

Bosses Laptop. At our company BBQ years ago. I was locked and thought it would be a great idea to steal the bosses laptop from his desk. Took it home in the taxi and spent the journey reading his emails and documents like a great fella. Woke up the next morning with the laptop beside me on the bed. Immediate panic set in. Never considered CCTV or the fact that I might've been seen or anything like that. Had to smuggle the laptop back into the office that day (sunday) before anyone noticed it was gone. Not good.

Nothing interesting on the laptop was there??

Hector Bellend

partyguinness wrote: »

Managed to wrestle home a bus stop sign as in the full 10-11 foot job...

The front badge off a Mercedes which I was genuinely mortified about afterwards. I honestly did not expect it to break off so easy as they are usually tied down with metal cable but not this car....it was 20 years ago...

Chicks prefer 10 inchers

Grayson

I know someone who stole a wheelchair from a 24 hour supermarket. It was for disabled customers. He walked in and just sat down. When security approached him he told them it was his and wheeled himself out.

Winterlong

To be honest - getting home without losing anything or anyone is normally considered and achievement for me.

ElKavo

3 Piece clutch kit, traffic cones and an election poster cos the chap looked* like Simon Cowell, Propped it up in the bedroom so it would be the first thing the missus saw in the morning.








*he did not look like Simon Cowell in the morning.

partyguinness

One night as a drunken idiot student, a certain University ****team was out celebrating after winning an intervarsity and the Cup was being bandied about the nightclub.

Of course, cowboy here and a partner in crime thought it would be gas craic altogether to get my hands on it, hide it and leg it home.

For the record, we had nothing whatsoever to do with this sport or team. Hell we were not even the right gender.

Cue: panic among the team and even pleas in the University mag for its return. As we ran home thinking we were gas ****er altogether my buddy took it to his place never to be seen again. He still denied everything and claimed not to have taken it.

*Even though it was nearly 20 years ago. I am not taking any chances....:o

partyguinness

Oh yes this is good....the Sam Maguire. Ok, not me but my flatmates at the time.

Was living in a particular county (county and year will remain anonymous but it was well over 10 years ago) the said county had won the All Ireland and were in my town on the beer with the Sam Maguire being carried around.

After the formalities the players (not all just 5-6 of the team) settled into one particular pub for a lock in. My flatmate was walking home late and passed the pub to see the Sam Maguire in all its glory just sitting on the footpath outside the pub with nobody around.

As we literally lived across the road, my buddy grabbed it and made a run for it. Woke up the next morning and there is was in the bottom of his bed.

After the initial laughing our balls off subsided we decided that we probably would not get away with keeping it.

He took it back the following morning to the local Garda Station and basically made himself out to be a hero and said it had just found it a few minutes earlier. No more was every said about it.

mosesgun

Village Crazy Lady wrote: »

Nothing interesting on the laptop was there??

Actually there was as I recall. Peoples salary details etc. I was too drunk to make sense of it or even remember it!!

Gravelly

partyguinness wrote: »

Oh yes this is good....the Sam Maguire. Ok, not me but my flatmates at the time.

Was living in a particular county (county and year will remain anonymous but it was well over 10 years ago) the said county had won the All Ireland and were in my town on the beer with the Sam Maguire being carried around.

After the formalities the players (not all just 5-6 of the team) settled into one particular pub for a lock in. My flatmate was walking home late and passed the pub to see the Sam Maguire in all its glory just sitting on the footpath outside the pub with nobody around.

As we literally lived across the road, my buddy grabbed it and made a run for it. Woke up the next morning and there is was in the bottom of his bed.

After the initial laughing our balls off subsided we decided that we probably would not get away with keeping it.

He took it back the following morning to the local Garda Station and basically made himself out to be a hero and said it had just found it a few minutes earlier. No more was every said about it.

I saw the Sam Maguire lying on a couch in the public area of a certain well-known Dublin hotel a few years back, the morning after the All Ireland final, with two players from the winning team asleep nearby, and nobody else around. I was sorely tempted to make off with it.

aujopimur

Your granny.

jamesbere

Let's see, well......

Someone else's car
Traffic cones
Branches
Road signs
Light bulbs from the local big Christmas tree

I know there's something else but can't remember

maccored

i got a taxi one night with a flashing road works sign under my shirt. I was so pissed I thought only I noticed how the inside of the taxi lit up every few seconds. fair dues to the driver - he said nothing

Gravelly

maccored wrote: »

i got a taxi one night with a flashing road works sign under my shirt. I was so pissed I thought only I noticed how the inside of the taxi lit up every few seconds. fair dues to the driver - he said nothing

He probably thought you were ET

eurokev

Most random thing I brought back from a night out was a goldfish. I won it at the funfair during the day and continued the day getting absolutely s**tfaced. Must have had 15 pints which is way way way over my limit. The goldfish survived the roughly ten hour long binge in his plastic bag. Got a lot of attention carrying him around the whole night and dancing with it in the night club. Some craic.

Not bringing stuff home per se, but my favourite 'hobby' as a student was myself and two mates would take out markers with us and change every 'To Let' sign we could see to 'toilet' by adding an i in the middle. We would then take a picture of ourselves pi**ing in the doorway. Bad form but good craic at the time

Bredabe

Any amount of other ppl's handbags,
women's jackets,
a handful of other ppl's unwanted children.

*One of the above "children" is a stunning young women, men in pubs/clubs just hand her their shoes/jocks when she asks for them.

Burial.

I once got my hands on a canoe in perfect condition. All while being a good 30 min drive away from the nearest lake or river. That was a nice centrepiece for the college sitting room. Of course on boring nights we'd end up getting hammered and fly down the stairs in it.

Aside from that just the standard cones, traffic signs, advertising billboards, election posters, the odd bicycle and of course those restaurant menu stands which are a nightmare to haul home. The look of confusion on our foreign landlord when he's collecting rent seeing all the stuff in the sitting room was priceless.

greenflash

I lived in London for a few years and had a group of mates living in various houses around North London. We all acquired a station name sign from our local overground station. Most of them were unbolted from a wall but one was uprooted from the platform with the poles still in place. One house near Enfield got a visit from British Rail and had their sign taken back and restored to the station. You could read "Jason's pants skid stains" written across it in marker for years after.

In my house, as well as the station sign, we had the street name from the end of the road, complete with paving slabs and, for a while, a full street light. Pole, lamp the lot. We bad to get rid of it because the only way it fitted in the house was to go diagonally from the bottom of the back of the kitchen to the top of the hall wall by the front door.

We tried to rob the sign from the front of our local "The Goat" but got caught.

ToddyDoody

A unionist, believe it or not.

Stonedpilot

Knew a lad pulled a used destroyed piano out of a skip and pushed it the whole way home. Was impressive he was yoked out of it and it was several miles!.

Weirdest thing I brought home was a new box of condoms that had wrapped condoms that seemed used.

Bozo Skeleton

The usual traffic cones and a Hazelhatch train station sign that was lying around.
Took a heavy as **** electric typewriter out of a skip on North Fredrick Street up to Phibsborough, Reason I point out the geography is it was all up hill, while hammered.
Also done the exact same thing with an accordian another night. On sober investigation the morning after, both of them didn't work, thrown in a skip for good reason

Your Face

A big bag of cliched anecdotes.

sbs2010

I took and still have the 1996 Blue Flag from Torremelinos beach.

I plan to bring in back in 2046 and give it to the Mayor at a civic reception held in my honour.

hairyslug

A burnt out motorbike engine, the bike was on fire in the Dorset st flats when we were heading out, on the walk home, we picked it up, it was heavier than I thought it would be.

We must have amassed about 70 cones and when the MTV awards were on, we got our hands on a few traffic barriers, had to bend them to get them up the stairs.

Victor

There is a Seventh Day Adventists church on Ranelagh Road. I'm told a group of UCD students tole the LED sign that they had out front.

Yes, they got a sign from God.

GrumpyMe

A "Ward Sister"...

stampydmonkey

Cones, signs, trolleys usual stuff. Best haul was a wooden picnic bench. Took 4 us. We saw a squad car approaching as we moved it down the road so we dropped it on the footpath, and just sat down like normal. They slowly drove passed and said nothing. It was 4-5am so was a little surreal. Was a great addition to the house. And yes we were little thieves in college

Teyla Emmagan

Why on earth would anyone bring home a traffic cone, or any of the other junk in this thread??