Love Triangle

bmwguy

Fonze, family emergencies, Egyptians working in Australia looking to whisk her off......undecided romantic feelings, stringing you along.

Somehow I think you are being played here. You may not see it. It happened to me. Girl from Moldova. Beautiful she was. With her for a few months then into all her b*llsh*t stories. Including saying she loved me, nobody ever cared for her like me, i was special, and the same one as yours, a family emergency back home.

I believed them all for a while no matter what people said to me. But it was all lies.

Be very very careful. She might be playing a very serious long game. You probably won't need these words but maybe you will.

There's nothing complicated here.
She broke up with you and expected you to move on. You found out she was dating someone else and decided to keep pursuing her and "showing her how much you love her". Which you didn't bother to do originally, only until you couldn't have her anymore.
Leave her alone and move on with your life. Nobody is keeping you in limbo except yourself. Nothing in your post indicates that even if she did break up with him that she'd get with you.

edanto

She is not showing any signs of caring for you. She is being deceitful to both you and the other guy.

Run away. End it now.

Any future with this woman will hurt, hurt and hurt.

Rekop dog

Fonze07 wrote: »

I don't want to say it for the sake of it so if I am completely honest I don't think I am strong enough to do that because my feelings for her are beyond anything I've ever experienced before.

She's treating you like a piece of dirt and probably laughing you up with all her mates.

She doesn't like you, she never liked you, you're only a confidence boost for her. Unfortunately there are insecure people out there like this who need regular validation such as what you're providing for her.

Believe me there are plenty of people out there who'll treat you with respect. But you need to respect yourself first, and that's what you're failing to do here and she smells the weakness.

Please do the right thing and cut her off and begin the process of healing.

Dead Tribute Banned

Op, you've been given so much great advice but I'm hazarding a guess it's falling on deaf ears. You want this girl to love you back but she doesn't. It's really that simple. This isn't a love triangle, this isn't a love anything. She is enjoying the attention from two different guys and knows damn well she has you under her spell.

I guarantee, in fact I'd put money on the fact that if you were to pull right back, zero contact, not even replying to her messages, let alone instigating them, she would suddenly become interested in you again.

She'd be intrigued as to why you're no longer pining for her and would make false promises about leaving the other guy just to reel you back in. She would have no actual intention of being with you though. It's an exercise in power. You'd fall for it like a chump and fawn all over her again only to be drop kicked once more.

Don't do that to yourself. Have some self respect. I hate the expression 'man up' but it fits the bill here. You sound like a really lovely bloke so stop wasting time and emotions on somebody who isn't going to reciprocate... ever.

Be good to yourself OP. We all go through this. You will be fine in time.

LegacyUser

You are being strung along OP as others have already pointed out and the best thing you can do for yourself is to cut all contact with her. Don't worry about what is best for her, it is yourself that should be the priority.

The fact that she lives in another country should make it slightly easier for you to move on as there is no chance of bumping into her on the street or in a pub etc. I know this is very hard for you right now but it really does get better in time. But if you do not allow yourself to move on then you are preventing yourself from finding another relationship where you will still have the same strong feelings, but crucially your partner will feel the same and there won't be all this drama.

She lives in another country too, so even if she did break up with this current fella and agreed to get back with you, then your relationship is a virtual one over phone or text or whatever and you always have the worry day to day that she meets someone else locally and you are put through the same thing again. My final point is why would you want to be with someone who is this involved with another person (in this case you) while in a relationship with someone else. The texts she is currently sending you are not appropriate for someone who is already in a relationship and if you ever did get back together you will have first hand experience of how she can divide her affections amongst multiple people at the drop of a hat and it will always be in the back of your mind. You will not be able to trust her. No trust then there is no point.

I know you are hurting OP but the only course of action I can recommend is to cut contact completely. Anything less than this will only damage your healing process and your ability to move on. Best of luck and try to see that there are other opportunities out there for you but you have to allow yourself to be open to them. You are flogging a dead horse at the moment. It's time to stop flogging.

bucketybuck

And just what does the OP think she is saying to the other fella in her text messages to him? Asking about his day? Swapping recipes?

Cop on OP, she has a boyfriend and you ain't it. You are pining away in the friend zone for a girl who doesn't even live in the same country and who is using you as an emotional crutch while she fantasises about another man.

Do yourself a favour and drop the "love of my life" crap, block all contact, draw a line in the sand and start afresh from there.

Or sit and wallow in this teenage drama, it's your call.

Dead Tribute Banned

bucketybuck wrote: »

And just what does the OP think she is saying to the other fella in her text messages to him? Asking about his day? Swapping recipes?

Cop on OP, she has a boyfriend and you ain't it. You are pining away in the friend zone for a girl who doesn't even live in the same country and who is using you as an emotional crutch while she fantasises about another man.

Do yourself a favour and drop the "love of my life" crap, block all contact, draw a line in the sand and start afresh from there.

Or sit and wallow in this teenage drama, it's your call.

You won't get better advice OP. Follow this!!!!

kylith

OP tell her to stop contacting you until she has broken up with this guy. It's not fair of her to be telling you she loves you when she's with someone else, and it's not fair of you to be angling for some else's girlfriend.

If she leaves you alone, either forever or until she's single, that's good. If she doesn't then you know for a fact that she's using you as an ego boost and doesn't actually care about how you feel.