Eternity ring / push presents

Sherlof3

This may be a controversial one...but what do ye think about push presents or eternity rings? Are you expecting one, or did you recieve one?

Milly33

a push present, this must be a new thing is it.. Never heard of it.. Eterntiy rings yep have been around for ages and I be thinking the same as anything else your either like or dont like

shesty

Instead of a 'push present' ( hate that phrase) of jewellery or something I'd suggest spending your cash on getting a cleaner lined up to come to your house regularly in the first few months.Mundane and all though it is, it would be an amazing thing to get.
I thought eternity rings were for after you had all your kids.I find this confusing!do you go get an eternity ring for each birth?That would be a pricey pastime!

jlm29

shesty wrote: »

Instead of a 'push present' ( hate that phrase) of jewellery or something I'd suggest spending your cash on getting a cleaner lined up to come to your house regularly in the first few months.Mundane and all though it is, it would be an amazing thing to get.
I thought eternity rings were for after you had all your kids.I find this confusing!do you go get an eternity ring for each birth?That would be a pricey pastime!

I know some people who have gotten eternity rings for first anniversary presents, and others after first child. It's just one ring, not one for each child I think!
I've had two kids, and not a "push present" to be seen! It's not a new thing though milly, I remember hearing the phrase when I had my first, and he'll be 6 this year.

BOB2017

Is it kind of an American thing? I doubt himself has heard of it and even if he had I wouldn't be expecting anything.

Toots

My husband's very traditional and always said an eternity ring would be for either the first anniversary or the birth of the first child. Since in our case the two fell within weeks of each other, it seemed like a good time to do it :pac:

I'm expecting baby #2 now, but I'm not expecting to be given anything shiny when he or she is born. If the hubby really wants to give me a gift, he can do the night feeds! I used to work with a group of girls who were very much in to 'push presents' - one of them had gotten her eternity ring after the first baby arrived, and when she was pregnant with the second, she spent ages browsing through the (very expensive) jeweler next door to our office, picking out what the husband was going to get her when the baby was born.

scarepanda

I got a ring when our lo was born. It's my 'eternity' ring, but not a traditional eternity ring, and I don't wear it on my marriage finger. There was a few reasons I got it. Mainly because I was looking for this type of ring for ages and ages and just happened to see the right one a few weeks before bubs was born, so it seemed appropriate, although I didn't know I was getting it. Also at the time we weren't married/engaged and had no intentions of getting married either, so it was kind of symbolic in that regard as well.

We've since got engaged and my 'engagement' is not a traditional engagement ring, but an eternity ring!

bee06

Never heard of push present and the name makes me cringe. Whether my husband gets me something or not is up to him. I have no expectations of anything. I am due at Christmas so it would be an easy double up present alright.

73trix

Neither! I didn't want an eternity ring so my partner took that on board. I'm actually not a fan of that style of ring tbh.

I never heard of push present til recently and think it's an American -ised idea like this idea of a baby shower - which I'm also allergic to!

So, yeah, I'm a bit bah humbug at the unnecessary - Ness of these "gifts". I like somebody's idea of the cleaner tho!!

unknowngirl!!

A push present? That just sounds awful, I'd cringe if I heard anyone talking about that or asking for one!

Moonbeam

I think a nice present to mark the birth of the 1st child is a lovely idea.
I got himself a really nice watch that he wanted.

meeeeh

So push present is patting yourself on the back for giving birth. Everyone moron can do that. It's not surprising that there are a lot less presents for bringing up well adjusted and happy individuals.

I also had to google what eternity ring is. So safe to say I didn't get and more importantly want anything.

5starpool

I only heard about the existence of these things a few months back when someone mentioned it to me. I asked my wife what she thought and she said it would never have really occurred to her at all, so that's all good by me.

We just moved into a new house, and with baby #1 due in 5 weeks, I think that's present enough for both of us for a while

73trix

5starpool wrote: »

I only heard about the existence of these things a few months back when someone mentioned it to me. I asked my wife what she thought and she said it would never have really occurred to her at all, so that's all good by me.

We just moved into a new house, and with baby #1 due in 5 weeks, I think that's present enough for both of us for a while

Apparently my OH got the "you have to get her an eternity ring" from his dad and brothers but I had told him not to get me one as it's an unnecessary expense and he listened. Which was great.

I also told him I didn't want an engagement ring but he ignored me on that one. You can't win em all I guess! ;-)

5starpool

73trix wrote: »

Apparently my OH got the "you have to get her an eternity ring" from his dad and brothers but I had told him not to get me one as it's an unnecessary expense and he listened. Which was great.

I also told him I didn't want an engagement ring but he ignored me on that one. You can't win em all I guess! ;-)

I wasn't getting out of the engagement ring one unfortunately!

TPF2012

Toots wrote:

My husband's very traditional and always said an eternity ring would be for either the first anniversary or the birth of the first child. Since in our case the two fell within weeks of each other, it seemed like a good time to do it

It's a 'tradition' created in the 1960s by De Beers to sell more diamonds, as well as the engagement ring.

Toots

TPF2012 wrote: »

It's a 'tradition' created in the 1960s by De Beers to sell more diamonds, as well as the engagement ring.

Does that matter? Surely the sentiment behind giving it to someone is what's important?

TPF2012

Toots wrote:

Does that matter? Surely the sentiment behind giving it to someone is what's important?

A simple gift with meaning and thought would be the greater sentiment rather then paying over the odds for a diamond ring.

Toots

TPF2012 wrote: »

A simple gift with meaning and thought would be the greater sentiment rather then paying over the odds for a diamond ring.

That's a bit of an assumption. Personally my eternity ring wasn't expensive, and it wasn't diamonds either. My husband bought a ring with our child's birthstone instead. Even if someone does pay over the odds for a diamond ring, who are you to say there was no thought put into it?

TPF2012

Toots wrote:

That's a bit of an assumption. Personally my eternity ring wasn't expensive, and it wasn't diamonds either. My husband bought a ring with our child's birthstone instead. Even if someone does pay over the odds for a diamond ring, who are you to say there was no thought put into it?

OK. I'm just ranting at how a clever marketing campaign by a company can create a tradition that ensures that their product has a market. I don't disagree with push presents or anniversary gifts per se but I'm irritated how Western society fell for it.

scarepanda

TPF2012 wrote:

A simple gift with meaning and thought would be the greater sentiment rather then paying over the odds for a diamond ring.

Can a simple gift with meaning and thought not be a ring? Eternity rings do not need to cost the earth. Eternity rings do not have to be a traditional eternity ring.

At the end of the day, some people like the sentiment of an eternity ring, others don't. And no one is wrong or right regardless of what side of the fence you are on. It's not fair to be so dismissive towards someone just because they like the idea of an eternity ring.

lazygal

I got a ring after the birth of our first child. Not a diamond one (as I don't really care for diamonds, my engagement ring isn't a diamond either) but a stone I like. Not all of us think we should get something based on a marketing campaign from the 1960s. My husband wanted to get me something, I love jewellery, we could afford it and it was something we chose together. The things people get cynical about never ceases to amaze me.

tuisginideach

No 'push presents' thank God in my time. After 10 years of marriage, I (designed and) was given a beautiful ring with our four birthstones in it. My mother got an eternity ring for her 40th wedding anniversary and was thrilled!

lazygal

LOL didn't push once during two births so I wouldn't call my ring a push present!

brokensoul

lazygal wrote: »

LOL didn't push once during two births so I wouldn't call my ring a push present!

Ha! No pushing for me either, but my husband did get me a lovely silver bracelet with the twin's names and date of birth engraved on the inside. Maybe not the traditional gift but I love it.

Toots

A more appropriate title might be a hemhorroid compensation token :pac:

ted1

My wife was expecting one, but she got a house instead.

I had to explain that the money I as going to spend on one would come out of house fund. We bought just before baby was born.

Toots

Well a house is a pretty decent present!

wuffly

I think like most things if there's an issue its generally with people's expectations. Where I live at the moment push presents are definitely a thing. To the point I've been asked a few times what mine was... to which I reply 'my son'. I've known one guy that bought one for his wife and was so proud and possibly delirious he gave it to her when she was in labour... everyone else I know chose their own... just not my thing but hey if they both agree why not. Here in general women work until their due date and go back to work at 45 days pp. A present that says thanks you are pretty amazing doing all that considering what you & your body have just been through on top of leaving your tiny new born is pretty minimal by comparison. In any case, its a gift and should be given freely and not on demand.

Milly33

I have seen this mentioned on some of the more american sites and everytime I see it, i just cringe.. what a horrible phrase Push Present.. If my hubbie was like saying that to me Id actually be quite offended..

The Diddakoi

I'm beginning to feel a bit hard done by here

5 babies, and I never received a push present!

I've never had a dishwasher either...not that that is relevant to the post in any way, just thought I'd moan about it while I was on a role

catrionanic

I received a beautiful €2.99 pot plant, with the price tag still on it

xalot

My husband got me a very nice bottle of wine, not really a push present more a 'thanks for taking such good care of our unborn baby and putting his needs first' kind of a present.

You do put your own life on hold for nearly a year and I think your other half should acknowledge the toll it takes on your body and life. There doesn't need to be a present just a note of appreciation.

I would have loved the cleaner voucher that someone else suggested, very practical.

Neyite

I got cheese.

I'd been craving all sorts of unpasteurised cheeses and runny fried egg sambos all through the pregnancy so when I got home from the hospital there was a cheese and wine hamper waiting for me and he made me a divine double decker fried egg sambo with a big mug of tae exactly the way I liked it. Plus he'd the house absolutely spotless and fresh bedding on the bed for me.

I picked a good 'un.

Ms2011

My push 'presents' on each of mine was him doing the nights feeds for the first few nights I got home from the hospital, after 3 & 5 days in hospital sleeping on a noisy, public hospital ward there was no better present than a full nights sleep in my own bed...bliss:)
Some things money just can't buy

73trix

Ms2011 wrote: »

My push 'presents' on each of mine was him doing the nights feeds for the first few nights I got home from the hospital, after 3 & 5 days in hospital sleeping on a noisy, public hospital ward there was no better present than a full nights sleep in my own bed...bliss:)
Some things money just can't buy

Oh WOW! Maybe I should reconsider breastfeeding this time.....

On #1 neither of us slept at all for week 1 as babs was a terrible sleeper and never napped and.... Oh God..... Here we go again...... Aaargh!!! 😀

Ms2011

73trix wrote: »

Oh WOW! Maybe I should reconsider breastfeeding this time.....

I breastfed #2, fed her myself before I went to sleep, she'd sleep for 6 hours, hubby gave her a bottle at night, put her back down and I'd feed her myself the next morning.
She was a great sleep though, still is

catrionanic

Ms2011 wrote: »

I breastfed #2, fed her myself before I went to sleep, she'd sleep for 6 hours, hubby gave her a bottle at night, put her back down and I'd feed her myself the next morning.
She was a great sleep though, still is

A newborn only waking once per night is incredible!

73trix

Ms2011 wrote: »

I breastfed #2, fed her myself before I went to sleep, she'd sleep for 6 hours, hubby gave her a bottle at night, put her back down and I'd feed her myself the next morning.
She was a great sleep though, still is

We didn't get a 6 hr stretch til at least 4 mths. #envy

catrionanic

73trix wrote: »

We didn't get a 6 hr stretch til at least 4 mths. #envy

My wee man is five months and we aren't even getting a 3 hour stretch!

73trix

catrionanic wrote: »

My wee man is five months and we aren't even getting a 3 hour stretch!

Are you bfeeding? I think it only happened when one bottle of formula appeared in night feed regime! Thank Christ
...

Wesser

A push present? What's that? A present for pushing out a baby??!!! Wtf???!!!


I don't understand how it is a present. Surely if this is your partner or husband the money to pay for it comes out if your joint fund.... so you're effectively paying for half if it yourself and also if he spends this money you can't buy something else.....

Ms2011

catrionanic wrote: »

A newborn only waking once per night is incredible!

Nurses in the hospital weren't happy & would give out to me for not waking her every 3 hours especially as I was breastfeeding but she still managed to leave hospital at 3 days old weighing the same as her birth weight so she was obviously getting all she needed and was content

bee06

Wesser wrote: »

I don't understand how it is a present. Surely if this is your partner or husband the money to pay for it comes out if your joint fund.... so you're effectively paying for half if it yourself and also if he spends this money you can't buy something else.....

Couldn't you say the same about any present ever bought in a long term relationship?

Digs

Ms2011 wrote: »

I breastfed #2, fed her myself before I went to sleep, she'd sleep for 6 hours, hubby gave her a bottle at night, put her back down and I'd feed her myself the next morning.
She was a great sleep though, still is

Second baby thing?? My second was the same, went to bed with her at 9pm (we co slept) fed her (also breastfeeding), she might wake at around 3/4am for a feed (or in the early weeks I'd wake and give her a nudge!) and then onto 8am!

Whopper sleeper! I feel we earned it after a disastrous first sleeper

My husband happened to buy me a ring for our first wedding anniversary which is coincidentally when we found out I was pregnant with #1. On my second he got me a chain with my girls initials on it and his birthstone. Haven't taken it off since and it's my favourite thing I've ever owned. I've never referred to it as a push present but he wanted to give me something to mark our little family growing!