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Has this ever happened to you?

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  • 11-05-2017 9:39am
    #1
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭


    Due to a guy I went to school with harassing me through Facebook messenger the guards told me to deactivate my Facebook account for a while. I have done nothing wrong so why should I do it? I have him blocked and I went through my security settings on it the other day too. I like going on it to keep up with family and friends who I wouldn't see all that much.


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    #2
    weldoninhio
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,311 ✭✭✭✭weldoninhio


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Due to a guy I went to school with harassing me through Facebook messenger the guards told me to deactivate my Facebook account for a while. I have done nothing wrong so why should I do it? I have him blocked and I went through my security settings on it the other day too. I like going on it to keep up with family and friends who I wouldn't see all that much.

    Gardai in using lazy option shocker!! Once he is blocked he shouldn't be able to message you, if he does, keep a log of everything he sends (screenshot it and save it to a Word document maybe), and reported it to the Gardai again. They have no right to tell you to deactivate your FB, they prob just think he'll stop if he notices your profile gone.


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    #3
    donegaLroad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭donegaLroad


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Due to a guy I went to school with harassing me through Facebook messenger the guards told me to deactivate my Facebook account for a while. I have done nothing wrong so why should I do it? I have him blocked and I went through my security settings on it the other day too. I like going on it to keep up with family and friends who I wouldn't see all that much.

    a solicitor's letter would do the trick.

    Harassment is a criminal offence in Ireland under the Non Fatal Offence Act, 1997.

    You have already reported it to the Gardai, you should follow up with a solitictor's letter if this person continues to harrass you. (maybe you should be posting this on the legal advice forum?)


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    #4
    Winterlong
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,759 ✭✭✭Winterlong


    Yeah, the Gardai are suggesting the blunt force option.
    Like asking them how to avoid your house getting burgled.
    "Move out".


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    #5
    Skihunta13
    Registered Users Posts: 161 ✭✭Skihunta13


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Due to a guy I went to school with harassing me through Facebook messenger the guards told me to deactivate my Facebook account for a while. I have done nothing wrong so why should I do it? I have him blocked and I went through my security settings on it the other day too. I like going on it to keep up with family and friends who I wouldn't see all that much.
    Are these private messages, if so post them on your page gor all to see. Name and shame.


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    #6
    eamonnq
    Registered Users Posts: 4,010 ✭✭✭eamonnq


    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=103377292&postcount=6185


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    #7
    kunst nugget
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,375 ✭✭✭✭kunst nugget


    I used to use facebook a lot as did a lot of my friends but it's use has petered out completely. Tbh, if this happened and the Gardai suggested that to me it would give me the push I need to finally deactivate my account.


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    #8
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    I like being on Facebook though. As I said I use it to keep up with family and friends who I don't see much. I'm a big girl now and know if he contacts me again I can go back to the guards.


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    #9
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    Skihunta13 wrote: »
    Are these private messages, if so post them on your page gor all to see. Name and shame.

    They are private messages​. I don't think naming and shaming is the way to go. He seems to be mentally ill.


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    #10
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    OP, I had noticed you posting this elsewhere. To be honest you'd be better off looking for something along the lines of a Barring or Safety order. If this is being pursued, the only means to hinder him in the short term is to close out on Facebook. Although as an option, have you followed up with Facebook to get him blocked?
    donegaLroad wrote: »
    a solicitor's letter would do the trick.

    Harassment is a criminal offence in Ireland under the Non Fatal Offence Act, 1997.

    You have already reported it to the Gardai, you should follow up with a solitictor's letter if this person continues to harrass you. (maybe you should be posting this on the legal advice forum?)

    Why would it? The letters can be ignored without any issue. It's just expensive correspondence.


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    #11
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    Could I ring Facebook in Dublin and explain the situation?


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    #12
    jeanjolie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 484 ✭✭jeanjolie


    Dravokivich wrote: »
    OP, I had noticed you posting this elsewhere. To be honest you'd be better off looking for something along the lines of a Barring or Safety order. If this is being pursued, the only means to hinder him in the short term is to close out on Facebook. Although as an option, have you followed up with Facebook to get him blocked?



    Why would it? The letters can be ignored without any issue. It's just expensive correspondence.

    Is it really harassment though? Correct me if I'm wrong but if she hasn't told him to politely '**** off' and he hasn't threatened her at all or continued to pester her, then there doesn't seem to be anything she can do.


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    #13
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Could I ring Facebook in Dublin and explain the situation?

    That all depends what they do there. There are a global company so could have some teams focused in different locations depending on the support required.

    When you select a Personal Message, there is an option to "Report". Have you followed through on that?
    jeanjolie wrote: »
    Is it really harassment though? Correct me if I'm wrong but if she hasn't told him to politely '**** off' and he hasn't threatened her at all or continued to pester her, then there doesn't seem to be anything she can do.

    Where she has posted elsewhere she indicated that this person had made threats.


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    #14
    silverharp
    Registered Users Posts: 17,856 ✭✭✭✭silverharp


    it must have a block feature or set it so you can only accept private messages from known accounts.

    A belief in gender identity involves a level of faith as there is nothing tangible to prove its existence which, as something divorced from the physical body, is similar to the idea of a soul. - Colette Colfer



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    #15
    Your Face
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,277 ✭✭✭Your Face


    DRAMA BOMB !

    Unfriend and block user.

    Unwanted attention gone if that's really what is wanted.


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    #16
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    He has said that he would like to meet my kids. They have no biological link to him in anyway. He got it into his head that he was my oldest son's dad but I can tell you he's not. He was ranting and raving to the guards when they called to his house. They said it's obvious he's not all there too. It's going on about 7 years on and off. He'd leave me alone for a bit and then start messaging me again.


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    #17
    Boom_Bap
    Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,730 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    silverharp wrote: »
    it must have a block feature or set it so you can only accept private messages from known accounts.

    It does have a block feature. There is a little cog icon in the chat window which is the settings. Open that up.
    There is a block option and there is a report option to notify FB. They take that quite seriously and will take action against the guy.


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    #18
    biko
    Registered Users Posts: 81,223 ✭✭✭✭biko


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Could I ring Facebook in Dublin and explain the situation?
    Sure, if you can find the number...


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    #19
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    biko wrote: »
    Sure, if you can find the number...

    Tried ringing them but they don't seem to have an actual person manning the phones.


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    #20
    Winterlong
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,759 ✭✭✭Winterlong


    KKkitty wrote: »
    Tried ringing them but they don't seem to have an actual person manning the phones.

    http://www.wikihow.com/Contact-Facebook
    Unfortunately, there is no way to directly contact Facebook--you can't call, text, email, or otherwise speak to an employee or affiliate of Facebook. You can, however, use Facebook's Help Center to diagnose and report a problem with your account.


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    #21
    KKkitty
    Registered Users Posts: 7,534 ✭✭✭KKkitty


    Winterlong wrote: »
    http://www.wikihow.com/Contact-Facebook

    It's so stupid that you can't speak to an actual person though.


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    #22
    eamonnq
    Registered Users Posts: 4,010 ✭✭✭eamonnq


    KKkitty wrote: »
    It's so stupid that you can't speak to an actual person though.

    They would probably be inundated with calls from people like your 'friend'.


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    #23
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    I saw an article online where this girl had blocked her ex everywhere, Facebook Instagram whatsapp viber twitter etc... and he transferred 4p into her account to leave her a message on the bank transfer.

    OP I know it sucks, but Facebook are a huge company. They have bigger fish to fry, so I can understand them not having a phone manned tondeal with complaints. Just keep reporting the pms and block him. If he's showing up near your house or contacting family or friends, report him again.


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    #24
    Gravelly
    Registered Users Posts: 4,119 ✭✭✭Gravelly


    KKkitty wrote: »
    It's so stupid that you can't speak to an actual person though.

    With nearly 2 billion "customers" they'd need an awful lot of phone operators.


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    #25
    Wossack
    Registered Users Posts: 7,005 ✭✭✭Wossack


    just unfriend and block? Whats the issue here?


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    #26
    silverharp
    Registered Users Posts: 17,856 ✭✭✭✭silverharp


    KKkitty wrote: »
    It's so stupid that you can't speak to an actual person though.

    I don't meant to insult you but you sound very naive when it comes to this aul social media thing. Remind me how much does your Facebook subscription cost every year?

    A belief in gender identity involves a level of faith as there is nothing tangible to prove its existence which, as something divorced from the physical body, is similar to the idea of a soul. - Colette Colfer



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    #27
    Biggest lickspittle on boardz
    Closed Accounts Posts: 558 ✭✭✭Biggest lickspittle on boardz


    KKkitty wrote: »
    He has said that he would like to meet my kids. They have no biological link to him in anyway. He got it into his head that he was my oldest son's dad but I can tell you he's not. He was ranting and raving to the guards when they called to his house. They said it's obvious he's not all there too. It's going on about 7 years on and off. He'd leave me alone for a bit and then start messaging me again.


    I'm not a legal eagle, but you should check if you can get a barring order or similar against him? (Again, I'm not an expert so maybe this only applies to ex-partners etc.)

    You should also consider contacting a security company to send some rather large and intimidating looking gentlemen to relay your concerns to the harasser. (No heavy stuff obs, just make sure he gets the message.)

    I know a woman who went through something similar, she was terrified of her life with this particular nut case. And to all the people making fun of the OP, I hope you never get to experience it first hand. Stalkers are utterly terrifying. She could barely eat or sleep, a few times I had to stay at her place just to keep her from having a breakdown. Not a laughing matter at all.


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    #28
    Boom_Bap
    Moderators, Music Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,730 Mod ✭✭✭✭Boom_Bap


    LexieOnRale wrote: »
    I saw an article online where this girl had blocked her ex everywhere, Facebook Instagram whatsapp viber twitter etc... and he transferred 4p into her account to leave her a message on the bank transfer.

    OP I know it sucks, but Facebook are a huge company. They have bigger fish to fry, so I can understand them not having a phone manned tondeal with complaints. Just keep reporting the pms and block him. If he's showing up near your house or contacting family or friends, report him again.

    FB want everything done thorugh their software. Everything!
    Not sure if there are any phones even in FB HQ :)


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    #29
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 11,614 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    KKkitty wrote: »
    It's so stupid that you can't speak to an actual person though.

    To be fair to them, they have about a billion users. If on any given day .001% of their users wanted to call them, they would need a call centre to handle 100,000 calls.
    It's going on about 7 years on and off. He'd leave me alone for a bit and then start messaging me again.

    How is he messaging you again, if you have him blocked?


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    #30
    CPTM
    Registered Users Posts: 1,312 ✭✭✭CPTM


    KKkitty wrote:
    Due to a guy I went to school with harassing me through Facebook messenger the guards told me to deactivate my Facebook account for a while. I have done nothing wrong so why should I do it? I have him blocked and I went through my security settings on it the other day too. I like going on it to keep up with family and friends who I wouldn't see all that much.

    I'm confused, when you block someone they cannot get into your page to initiate a message conversation right? Is the problem not solved?


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    #31
    Gravelly
    Registered Users Posts: 4,119 ✭✭✭Gravelly


    Deleted User wrote: »
    To be fair to them, they have about a billion users. If on any given day .001% of their users wanted to call them, they would need a call centre to handle 100,000 calls.

    Nearly double that.


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