Men: Do you regularly lie to your partners?

Let's forget white lies like, no you don't look fat in those jeans or saying traffic was heavy when in fact you were late because you were wasting time online.

I am confident that my partner is truthful with me. If any woman says this here on boards, she is confidently assured (by men) that all men lie and conceal.

I'm interested to see what percentage of AH users lie regularly to their partners. Let's use stag weekends as a litmus test.

Satts

No.

I can not think of a single incident of knowingly lying in my relationship at any point over it's now 12ish years length.

At most I think I may have understated a few truths. Such as fairly recently when I had a bit of a spectacular and somewhat comical break down due to stretching myself too thin over too many things - I mentioned a few times I was feeling not so great - but I think I massively understated to them just how crap I was feeling so as not to be a worry or some rubbish like that.

In fact even the white lies of which you mention is not something I would do. If an article of clothing accentuates or distorts a feature in a way that I know is unwelcome to the person - I would happily point the fact out to them if asked.

Drumpot

Nope.. I tell my wife everything...

The worst I do is goto cinema if I get some free time from work and tell her afterwards.

But, I try not to judge. I can't live with secrets from my wife , it just doesn't sit well with me, but others can.

An interesting debate is "if a person cheats on a partner , are they relieving their guilty consciounce by telling partner or are they taking responsibility for their actions?".

My opinion is that it depends on the person. If you cheat and don't care or think about it then you should tell your partner. If you cheated once , there was no fallout (STD etc) and it's tearing you up, that's your punishment for the crime you committed. You have to live with your actions..

Samuel T. Cogley

Are you a liar? If so please fill out my poll... honestly. :pac:

Samuel T. Cogley

Samuel T. Cogley wrote: »

Are you a liar? If so please fill out my poll... honestly. :pac:

It's anonymous

me_irl

No.

(Contrary to opinion) I'm not a cúnt.

OldGoat

Mystery Egg wrote: »

I'm interested to see what percentage of AH users lie regularly to their partners. Let's use stag weekends as a litmus test.

Eleventeen percent and my litmus paper is pinky bluish.

fizzypish

If you lie to your partner then your unlikely to be honest on a forum..... unless your a muppet. No lies from me. Pretty open with my partner other wise whats the point.

Maximus Alexander

Nah, the best part of my relationship with my OH is she is the one person I can share everything with.

Samuel T. Cogley

Mystery Egg wrote: »

It's anonymous

I'm not sure that makes a difference tbh.

osarusan

I avoid stags involving strippers etc / this is not relevant to my friend group.

Sham Squire

I've always wondered, whether male of female, if you have to lie about yourself to your partner, what the **** are you in a relationship with them for??

fizzypish

osarusan wrote: »

I avoid stags involving strippers etc / this is not relevant to my friend group.

There is nothing more uncomfortable as being in a strip club (Maybe thats an overstatement...). Its ****ing weird. This woman is dancing for me because I paid her does resonates (overpowers even) much stronger than lookat dem diddies. Odd looking guys giving the evil eye. Douchy guys walking about thinking their the bee's knees. Other guys like yourself trying to look like your enjoying yourself.

Samuel T. Cogley

Sham Squire wrote: »

I've always wondered, whether male of female, if you have to lie about yourself to your partner, what the **** are you in a relationship with them for??

I call BS on this and the whole Hollywood love thing. Relationships are messy and complicated. If you or anyone else here is genuinely honest 100% of the time, fair play, I'd wager a few of ye aren't being honest with yourselves though. That said the poll isn;t great, it doesn't take account of white lies etc. and it clearly driving at sex (stag dos) and sugar coats it.

jasonb

fizzypish wrote: »

There is nothing more uncomfortable as being in a strip club (Maybe thats an overstatement...). Its ****ing weird. This woman is dancing for me because I paid her does resonates (overpowers even) much stronger than lookat dem diddies. Odd looking guys giving the evil eye. Douchy guys walking about thinking their the bee's knees. Other guys like yourself trying to look like your enjoying yourself.

Yep, I went to a Strip Club with a group of mates for a stag, my first and last time going to one. The best word I can think of to describe the whole experience is 'surreal'. I definitely wouldn't consider it sexy!

And for what it's worth, I couldn't wait to tell my wife about it when I got home, it was just such a strange experience and I wanted to share it with her!

J.

Cee-Jay-Cee

No comment.

Potential-Monke

It's quite hard to lie to your hand...

Dravokivich

Never really saw the point in Lying. Regardless of who'd be on the other end of it.

me_irl

Potential-Monke wrote: »

It's quite hard to lie to your hand...

helimachoptor

All the time, but generally its "the child ate your last club milk" :eek:

Rega

I'm a terrible liar so I'd get caught out straight away.


.......unless that's a lie and in that case I could be the best liar in the world



...............................I'm Kaiser Soze

fizzypish

Rega wrote: »

I'm a terrible liar so I'd get caught out straight away.


.......unless that's a lie and in that case I could be the best liar in the world



...............................I'm Kaiser Soze

Lieception

OldGoat

Without a word of a lie I can say that about 70% of my friends are strippers or those that work with strippers.

I just had to get that off my chest.
(Badumtish!)

One eyed Jack

Sham Squire wrote: »

I've always wondered, whether male of female, if you have to lie about yourself to your partner, what the **** are you in a relationship with them for??

I don't really think you can relate one to the other in that way? If someone feels they have to lie to their partner about themselves, it's because they want to stay in the relationship with them, not because they don't.

Your Face

This thread is sexist.

fizzypish

Your Face wrote: »

This thread is sexist.

Because thread is used by women when they fix men clothing. Grade A sexism right there!

Your Face

fizzypish wrote: »

Because thread is used by women when they fix men clothing. Grade A sexism right there!

Stop assigning gender roles because the media says that is also sexist.

whoopsadoodles

Thread is, I suspect, as a result of another thread on an unnamed forum where a lady's husband told her he had been on a stag and had two private lapdances.

A number of men said on that thread, that any man who goes on a stag and said he didn't go to lapdancing clubs is a liar and that all men go to lapdancing clubs on stags and would never break away from the group if the group were going. They suggested that any woman who believes her man doesn't do these things is naive despite what her husband tells her, or how well she feels she knows the men in her life.

lazybones32

I was thinking that this thread is from a questioning spouse/partner who maybe is letting paranoia get a foothold where it shouldn't.


Of course he's going to let some naked woman arouse him....and maybe more? He'll clean up after and text you goodnight....nothing to worry about.

Heh. I'm not even slightly worried about my own partner.

Wildcard7

osarusan wrote: »

I avoid stags involving strippers etc / this is not relevant to my friend group.

That's an odd thing to say, and odd friends to have, in my humble opionion. I would find it creepy if someone went to strip clubs regularly (what's the point?), but one stripper on a stag is perfectly fine. I'd almost be a bit disappointed to go to a stag without one.

osarusan

Wildcard7 wrote: »

That's an odd thing to say, and odd friends to have, in my humble opionion. I would find it creepy if someone went to strip clubs regularly (what's the point?), but one stripper on a stag is perfectly fine. I'd almost be a bit disappointed to go to a stag without one.

It's the last option on the poll, verbatim.

andekwarhola

Generally can't think of any times I'd lie. One thing I've lied about is not disclosing a personal situation about a friend because he asked me not to, if that counts. The situation had nothing to do with my wife but she does know him.

Re: clubs Nobody i know well would really go to one.

Of all the stags I've ever been to, only one (years ago) ever ended up in a strip/lapdance club (for about an hour) so I went along (not been in one since).

Kinda boring and a waste of money if I'm being honest.

Not actually sure if I mentioned to my wife mainly because I know she wouldn't really care.

fizzypish

Your Face wrote: »

Stop assigning gender roles because the media says that is also sexist.

If my socks weren't so gosh darn thread bare, I'd find you and punch your face for disagreeing with me and my masculinity.

El Weirdo

"How many pints did you have?"

"Just the two."

andekwarhola

El Weirdo wrote: »

"How many pints did you have?" "Just the two."

I left these many instances out of my lofty summation because I view them not so much as lies but alternative filtering of information. :pac:

__Alex__

My fella would tell me if a strip visit happened on a stag. He wouldn't go into details about what happened there but he'd tell me the visit happened.

Your Face

fizzypish wrote: »

If my socks weren't so gosh darn thread bare, I'd find you and punch your face for disagreeing with me and my masculinity.

I don't think you want that to be the last thing you do in life.

lawred2

Mystery Egg wrote: »

Let's forget white lies like, no you don't look fat in those jeans or saying traffic was heavy when in fact you were late because you were wasting time online.

I am confident that my partner is truthful with me. If any woman says this here on boards, she is confidently assured (by men) that all men lie and conceal.

I'm interested to see what percentage of AH users lie regularly to their partners. Let's use stag weekends as a litmus test.

No.

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

optogirl

Wildcard7 wrote: »

That's an odd thing to say, and odd friends to have, in my humble opionion. I would find it creepy if someone went to strip clubs regularly (what's the point?), but one stripper on a stag is perfectly fine. I'd almost be a bit disappointed to go to a stag without one.

Yuck

Pyr0

I've learned from previous mistakes and tell my missus everything, it's simply not worth it in the long run for both parties to keep anything secret.

One eyed Jack

Pyr0 wrote: »

I've learned from pervious mistakes and tell my missus everything, it's simply not worth it in the long run for both parties to keep anything secret.

Freudian slip? :pac:

sbsquarepants

The first sign that someone is a liar - they'll tell you they don't lie.

The only people who don't lie are very young kids, who haven't copped that others don't know what they are thinking yet. It's actually a fairly good measure of intelligence the younger a child starts to lie!

So... all you people who have never lied to your partner - just stop it would you, you're embarrassing yourselves. If they are reading, don't be scared, they have no business being on their high horses - they've lied to you countless times also.

It doesn't mean you've a second family, or a basement full of dead hookers - but we've ALL lied, without a single exception.

Maximus Alexander

Lol. Whatever makes you feel better about it.

fizzypish

Your Face wrote: »

I don't think you want that to be the last thing you do in life.

Think your tough. THINK YOUR TOUGH? Come here and fight me.... and a few of my comrades...

whiskeyman

Lying in a relationship will very likely leave you open to being found out and could be rightly seen as a deal breaker.

Not telling the truth something quiet different, and I'd be surprised if there's many relationships where one or either doesn't tell the full truth.

sbsquarepants

sbsquarepants wrote: »

The first sign that someone is a liar - they'll tell you they don't lie.

The first sign that someone is a rapist - they'll tell you they are not a rapist.

Can probably construct the same sentence for 1000s of other things. Seems to be one of those self confirming bias things to me. Especially given the opposite is true too in that one sign someone is _not_ a liar - is they would also likely say they don't lie too.

sbsquarepants wrote: »

It doesn't mean you've a second family, or a basement full of dead hookers - but we've ALL lied, without a single exception.

All I can say - as I said above - is if I have done so in my now 12ish year long relationship - I genuinely can not recall it. So - speak for yourself I guess.

Pyr0

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Freudian slip? :pac:

You didn' see nothin'

<_<
>_>

"You can tell what food I'm thinking about by just looking at me, so I'm hardly going pull off a lie!" The Chap, recently.

I'm not a great liar myself, unless it's a white one to spare peoples feelings. I have one of those guilty faces. I feel guilty innocently walking through customs, never mind if I'm trying to hide something.