Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Hate confrontation with lazy housemate

Options
2»

Comments

  • Options
    #32
    The Raptor
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,433 ✭✭✭The Raptor


    Just an update, i couldn't bring up the issue. Who was I to demand a roster when there never was any. It feels as if you're putting demands onto others, you do this, you do that.

    I know full well that she was taking the pee. No one can be that stupid to not know how to wheel a bin. She moved in and figured out how to use the washing machine and dryer all by herself, because no one was going to do her washing for her. So she was never that stupid.

    I already had to ask her to pick up her hair from the shower, she would leave clumps of it. That was done alright but It's not my job to teach her how living in a house works.

    She's moving out so i don't have to put up with it much longer. The next housemate can't be that bad but then you never know how these things work.


  • Options
    #33
    uck51js9zml2yt
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,268 ✭✭✭✭uck51js9zml2yt


    The Raptor wrote: »
    Just an update, i couldn't bring up the issue. Who was I to demand a roster when there never was any. It feels as if you're putting demands onto others, you do this, you do that.

    I know full well that she was taking the pee. No one can be that stupid to not know how to wheel a bin. She moved in and figured out how to use the washing machine and dryer all by herself, because no one was going to do her washing for her. So she was never that stupid.

    I already had to ask her to pick up her hair from the shower, she would leave clumps of it. That was done alright but It's not my job to teach her how living in a house works.

    She's moving out so i don't have to put up with it much longer. The next housemate can't be that bad but then you never know how these things work.

    Set out the requirements clearly for the next person and in the meantime set up roster so it's in place when they arrive.


  • Options
    #34
    The Raptor
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,433 ✭✭✭The Raptor


    Isaias Tangy Crater wrote: »
    Set out the requirements clearly for the next person and in the meantime set up roster so it's in place when they arrive.

    Yes, thank you, that is a good idea, i will bring it up with the others. It has to be done and now is a good time before someone else moves in.


  • Options
    #35
    dellas1979
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭dellas1979


    The Raptor wrote: »
    Who was I to demand a roster when there never was any.

    Dont really understand the first few lines of your post (or who you are talking to), but ummmm you are the rosta.

    Seems to me OP, you've some work to do yourself on how to confront people. There is nothing wrong with saying how it is. Its just how you put it.

    A simple "Hey guys-can we set a rosta so that one person isnt stuck doing the chore all the time".

    Not "I am tired of doing all the chores. Im stuck doing it".

    See it as a learning experience (at home/for work.....etc)


  • Options
    #36
    Hollister11
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,482 ✭✭✭Hollister11


    I feel for you OP. I hate mess, and especially lazy Bastards who for nothing. If this was me I'd kick her out.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #37
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    Got to agree with everything Dellas said. Learning to be proactive is an important life skill. This story also underlines the importance of nipping matters in the bud. If you notice someone is doing something wrong, it is far easier to come to them in the early stages. Not a few months down the line.


  • Options
    #38
    JuliusCaesar
    Registered Users Posts: 4,882 ✭✭✭JuliusCaesar


    The Raptor wrote: »
    Just an update, i couldn't bring up the issue. Who was I to demand a roster when there never was any. It feels as if you're putting demands onto others, you do this, you do that.

    It seems you dislike "confrontation" to the extent you are giving yourself reasons not to ask her.
    The Raptor wrote: »
    I know full well that she was taking the pee. No one can be that stupid to not know how to wheel a bin.

    Really? Nobody ever notices the housework that other people do. Also, you must be REALLY good at mindreading. You are mindreading her like an expert. I just wonder are your assumptions about her actually correct.

    The Raptor wrote: »
    I already had to ask her to pick up her hair from the shower, she would leave clumps of it. That was done alright but It's not my job to teach her how living in a house works.

    Isn't it? We all have to learn to live with each other, and every family/flatshare has a different way of doing it.
    The Raptor wrote: »
    She's moving out so i don't have to put up with it much longer. The next housemate can't be that bad but then you never know how these things work.

    Or you can avoid letting the next one know what's acceptable/usual in your flatshare, hoping they'll pick it up from your thoughts, and you'll be back here complaining again that they aren't picking up on your vibes and hints.

    You could try an assertiveness course? That'll help you with getting the difference between making reasonable requests, repeatedly if necessary, and outright blazing rows. Just what do you think will happen if you "confront" someone? How do you think you would go about it?


  • Options
    #39
    Ursus Horribilis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,168 ✭✭✭Ursus Horribilis


    The Raptor wrote: »
    Just an update, i couldn't bring up the issue. Who was I to demand a roster when there never was any. It feels as if you're putting demands onto others, you do this, you do that.

    Because you and the rest of your housemates were so passive, this housemate trampled right over the lot of ye. I bet you weren't the only person in the house who was silently fuming over her behaviour. Yet not one of you took the bull by the horns and did something about it. If your next housemate has bad habits, what are you going to do? Collectively throw your hands up and do nothing? I bet if someone else in the house had tried to organise a roster or suggested changes to the way you do things, you'd have happily gone along with their suggestions.

    You have been handed a gilt-edged opportunity to sort things out here. Lazy filthy housemate is leaving so you don't have to have awkward conversations about bins or hair in showers. You already know your other housemates so it shouldn't be any big deal to have a chat about rosters or anything else you all feel could change in the house. They might even be glad that somebody else is doing something.


Advertisement