Suicide in Ireland.

freshpopcorn

I'm nearly in my mid twenties and one guy who I went to school with took his own life a few years ago. In my opinion he got involved in the wrong crowd and dropped out of school.
There is another school in the town and there seems to be a problem with suicide with its pupils and past pupils. School seems to be doing everything possible with the issue.
One thing I do notice is when somebody commits suicide sometimes people can go into social media overdrive taking about the person and they might influence another vunerable young person.
Another few men who'd have being older who committed suicide had trouble gambling, got caught drink driving, etc.
Speaking about the issue with my mother who'd be in her fifties she says there are more sucicdes now than when she was younger.
In my town I remember a few suicides in the mid 2000's I remember people saying that people couldn't keep up with people during the boom and then it was because of recession in the late 2000's.
I do think talking about the issue is important and supporting people when they need help. I also think there can be a lot of pressure put on people to be very successful either through doing a good leaving cert and get a course with high point.(which the person might have no interest in). Social media can also play apart in it when somebody might feel lonely. They can see loads of people have a good time and them being sat at home alone. Social media does have lots of benefits and some people really need to learn how to use it for the better in my opinion.
Is suicide an issue in your area either now or the past?

snubbleste

Has this not been done to death on AH already so to speak?

kneemos

Suicide was hidden in the past,it was one of the big sins in the church,and it was bizzarly illegal for some reason.

NIMAN

I think suicide is an issue all over the country to be honest, there isn't many places untouched by it.

I would agree that social media will have an influence in how people think about themselves and might lower their self-esteem etc, but whether or not we can apportion any blame for people taking their own lives is questionable.

People commited suicide before social media. Maybe its highlighted more now, I don't know. I would wonder how accurate any statistics there are out there re: suicide are. I am sure many deaths were suicides but maybe not reported as, for example, car crashes.

I do think there is definitely more pressure on people nowadays with regard to money, career, friends, looks, qualifications, probably because we are so connected.

We are seeing a lot more coverage of mental health issues now in the media. It is no longer a taboo subject and it is getting easier to say you are depressed than ever before. Whether or not the services are there to deal with it is another debate.

I also know a few people who have commited suicide over recent years, a neighbour and someone I used to work closely with. All younger than myself. It is a hard thing to grasp that people can get that low.

freshpopcorn

kneemos wrote: »

Suicide was hidden in the past,it was one of the big sins in the church,and it was bizzarly illegal for some reason.

That's something I often wondered was there many suicides in Ireland before.
My mother who's in her fifties did hear of a few when she was growing up.
Even today lots of suicides are still covered up are deaths by misadventure.

frozenfrozen

I think there are at least 2, maybe 3 people who have killed themselves from my year in secondary school and another few from the years close to it. another 3 or 4 from my college, and tens of friends of friends and then a massive amount of people I've just heard of but had no connection to, all in the last 4-5 years.

It is a massive issue in Limerick

Live in Kerry so suicide is a huge issue, would know of 3 that I was in class with or played football with, and a lot more that would be sorta friends of friends, neighbours of friends and so on. Some of them are unusual, like a man I know if in his 80s in the last year. Rural isolation is an issue for many, I think the fellows I know may have felt they hadn't achieved what they may have wanted and possibly felt life was passing them by. It's a very complex area, and don't want to reduce it to one or 2 minor issues, but when people sneer at issues like the demise of the pub in rural Ireland they don't realise that such places were often the only contact that many had with other people...and clearly not the healthiest place for someone with perhaps feelings of despondency or loneliness but perhaps better than no contact at all. Anyway, I may be a bit all over the place on this, and the are a huge number of factors at play. But think there is very little support in rural areas, and very little reaching out to such services as may be available by those who may be vulnerable. I would say that I wince at the thought of someone opting for suicide when faced with a driving ban...it seems so pointless but it's very easy for me to say, again the car may have been the only thing keeping them in contact with others.

FalconGirl

It's a national emergency nowadays. I'd say there isn't a community in Ireland that hasn't been affected by it in the last few years. Ireland's modern shame in my opinion that we are not dealing with it effectively.

I live in North Kildare where it's a massive issue. There were 3 youngsters in one leaving cert class that did it last year.

kneemos

freshpopcorn wrote: »

That's something I often wondered was there many suicides in Ireland before.
My mother who's in her fifties did hear of a few when she was growing up.
Even today lots of suicides are still covered up are deaths by misadventure.

Euphemisms are still used,died suddenly or was found dead for example.
Never heard much about it years ago either tbh.Think it was mostly covered up and recorded as something else.

_Brian

I live in rural Ireland and am in my 40's now. By the time I'd finished college at 19 I knew 7 people directly who had committed suicide over a three year period. I'd say in the 20 years since I could name another 10.

Some "fell in with the wrong crowd" as op said. But most were ordinary folk who just couldn't see any way forward. Some to this day 20 years later I can't believe did what they did, good circumstances jobs, partners and futures.

clsmooth

Is the incidence as high in Dublin?

clsmooth

clsmooth wrote: »

Is the incidence as high in Dublin?

I suspect the incidence is high across the country, but my experience is of living in South Kerry and it's passed into a fact of life here, many people will end theirs at their own hands. I can't pretend to know anything about life in Dublin, I suspect it is high there but the causes may not be exactly the same. I suspect true deprivation rather than social and geographical isolation may be more of an issue. Here in South Kerry I know people with pretty decent farms who committed suicide, so it wasn't despondency about income alone, it was more the futility of a lonely life...but again the issue is complex and I think anyone in the city may also feel isolated even if not geographically so.

Dirty Dingus McGee

A fella I was friends with in school killed himself a few years ago he was only 25.

I can perfectly understand why someone would do it I've often had suicidal thoughts myself I'd never do it as quiet simply I wouldn't have the guts to do it.It must take an unbelievable amount of bravery to take that final step and kill yourself.

To be honest I think the complexity of modern life compared to the past and the greater expectations put on people has to have had some impact on the number of suicides in Ireland.

lawlolawl

From personal experience, i find that Irish society puts an awful lot of pressure on young men in particular and some people are ill suited to deal with it. We can be very "cliquey" so if a young fella isn't into sports or a drinker or basically isn't "one of the lads" then they are pretty much nonexistent in their peers eyes.

Academic achievement has far too much stock put in it as well and a lot of 17-18 year olds see it as THE biggest deciding factor in how the rest of their life will be when it simply isn't.

Even as they progress through their 20s, there is still the expectation that they should have a steady girlfriend/fiancee/wife or at least be successful with women (that can have a huge effect on gay guys who may only be finding their feet at this stage), have a good job, etc and then be settled down by their late 20s. That doesn't happen for some young men so they end up feeling inadequate and it can cause huge mental health problems.

I'm 33 myself, single and i'm reasonably happy with my life at the moment but doubts about where i am in life do start to creep in when people look at you funny for saying you are single, have no children and live alone. It feels a bit like people are silently pitying you and it makes you think: "Christ, have i actually ****ed up my life?".

We can have all the campaigns and charity events in the world but it is a bit odd to do that on one hand and then have these nigh-on set in stone expectations for young men as well. I can't comment about how it is for women obviously but i would imagine a decent amount of them feel the same.

PARlance

I recall reading some survey a couple of years ago stating that the Midlands / West (or whatever Region they call it) has the highest rate of suicide in Europe.

I've lost one friend and one close acquaintance in the past 5 years. Both males in their 20's.

While it was hidden in the past, I do feel that there is a slight risk of it being glamified these days. I'm not sure how much that would affect someone with suicidal thoughts, but I'm sure it doesn't help. My friends brother gave a powerful speech about it at the funeral. Whilst he thanked everyone for the huge support and messages on SM, he made sure to hit home just how horrible the loss is.

Junkyard Tom

lawlolawl wrote: »

when people look at you funny for saying you are single, have no children and live alone.

I had good friends who were quick to pronounce 'I'll never settle down, me' while they secretly ached for precisely that. First chance they got to get hitched and they were gone. If people give you funny looks for not following the herd they're probably either regretful for acting reflexively on their own insecurities/societal pressures or are just plain stupid.

astonaidan

Just echoing what the guy was saying about rural Ireland, I feel my home town has a lot of the factors he mentioned. If you go to a bar you will see 15 guys to 1 girl. Its sad but alot of these lads will be batchelors, its become so much more common here, since most girls went away to college and didnt come back, where the guys all stayed and did a trade. One of my friends doesnt go out anymore, he will never meet a girl in his house, right now he has two social connections outside playing playstation, I feel sorry for this lad as I think hes a great lad, I just dont see a massive future for him, hopefully he proves me wrong and makes me look like a idiot

freshpopcorn

astonaidan wrote: »

Just echoing what the guy was saying about rural Ireland, I feel my home town has a lot of the factors he mentioned. If you go to a bar you will see 15 guys to 1 girl. Its sad but alot of these lads will be batchelors, its become so much more common here, since most girls went away to college and didnt come back, where the guys all stayed and did a trade. One of my friends doesnt go out anymore, he will never meet a girl in his house, right now he has two social connections outside playing playstation, I feel sorry for this lad as I think hes a great lad, I just dont see a massive future for him, hopefully he proves me wrong and makes me look like a idiot

Just note I'm not disregarding what your saying.
I know plenty of people who are happy in there home town, working on a farm, doing a trade and being single. The only thing that gets them down is society saying you've got to go to college and get a degree and get married and have children.

My name is URL

One thing I do notice is when somebody commits suicide sometimes people can go into social media overdrive

Yeah, people are idiots.

Even mainstream media does this now though, in spite of guidelines that they shouldn't.

Look at the coverage that 'online bullying' gets in relation to just regular bullying. And the way it's always portrayed as something that almost inevitably leads to suicide.

It's disgusting but people eat that stuff up... people are idiots.

Carlos Orange

clsmooth wrote: »

Is the incidence as high in Dublin?

Dublin has the lowest suicide rate (or near enough). They list 34 areas (counties and cities) and the pieces that make up Dublin are 27,32,33 and 34. Wicklow , Meath and Donegal are 28,29 and 31.


http://nsrf.ie/statistics/suicide/

philstar

PARlance wrote: »

I recall reading some survey a couple of years ago stating that the Midlands / West (or whatever Region they call it) has the highest rate of suicide in Europe.

not surprised its a dismal kip, populated by dismal looking towns

there's been a spike in Laois recently

http://www.irishtimes.com/news/social-affairs/clergy-dealing-with-suicide-becoming-sacramental-firemen-1.2618059

We are extremely social beings. We base our sense of worth on how we feel we compare to our peers. In the 1960s or before, when most people were just getting by, had low aspirations, low expectations, Ireland had among the lowest suicide rates in the world. Back then if your family didn't have the money you just didn't go to college, or even do your inter cert, so you got to feel that it was outside forces that were responsible for you not "getting a chance to" achieve highly - and your peers were likely in the same boat, working on the farm, or a factory, or getting an entry level job somewhere and working your way up with less pressure than nowadays. Nowadays if you "fail" in life, the blame is deemed to be all your own, since the system is set up to give everyone a "free" shot at achieving. This is one factor among many many I can think of for why there seems to be a real thread of disturbance among people nowadays. Social media and the internet has been the added ingredient which has exacerbated all this. Those who would have been popular and confident anyway now have added confidence that this is the case. Those who would have felt bad about themselves anyway, now feel they are socially worthless.

SEPT 23 1989

I think drink & drugs plays a big part in the problem

PMBC

I agree; it is in a lot of cases particularly booze which is chemically a depressant.

I find it offensive the poster describing the midlands as 'a dismal kip' particularly kip since it means brothel. Towns like Edenderry, Portarlington, Monasterevin do have their visual and social problems but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Once a poet talked about the beauty in a rose and another of the beauty of small things. We all need to be educated to see that beauty, at least occasionally.

Ragnar Lothbrok

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Even today lots of suicides are still covered up are deaths by misadventure.

I don't think it's correct to say these deaths are "covered up" by calling them death by misadventure. If there's no suicide note, or other clear indication that the person definitely intended to take their own life, the coroner has to rule it as death by misadventure, even if everyone suspects it was in fact a suicide.

SEPT 23 1989

if there is alcohol or drugs in the persons system its put down as death by misadventure

astonaidan

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Just note I'm not disregarding what your saying.
I know plenty of people who are happy in there home town, working on a farm, doing a trade and being single. The only thing that gets them down is society saying you've got to go to college and get a degree and get married and have children.

Oh for sure, my point was I could understand them being lonely and why it may be more prevalent in the future. My home town has a crazy high percentage of men from my generation.

cowboyBuilder

I wonder how Ireland compares with the rest of Europe ?
and would it be the worst if just taking rural areas into account ?

panda100

frozenfrozen wrote: »

It is a massive issue in Limerick

No actually its not. We have a moderate suicide rate with comparison with the rest of the world. The only difference is that the local Limerick media and people appear to be obsessed with suicide so is highlighted much more than it should be.

George Michael

lawlolawl wrote: »

From personal experience, i find that Irish society puts an awful lot of pressure on young men in particular and some people are ill suited to deal with it. We can be very "cliquey" so if a young fella isn't into sports or a drinker or basically isn't "one of the lads" then they are pretty much nonexistent in their peers eyes.

Academic achievement has far too much stock put in it as well and a lot of 17-18 year olds see it as THE biggest deciding factor in how the rest of their life will be when it simply isn't.

Even as they progress through their 20s, there is still the expectation that they should have a steady girlfriend/fiancee/wife or at least be successful with women (that can have a huge effect on gay guys who may only be finding their feet at this stage), have a good job, etc and then be settled down by their late 20s. That doesn't happen for some young men so they end up feeling inadequate and it can cause huge mental health problems.

I'm 33 myself, single and i'm reasonably happy with my life at the moment but doubts about where i am in life do start to creep in when people look at you funny for saying you are single, have no children and live alone. It feels a bit like people are silently pitying you and it makes you think: "Christ, have i actually ****ed up my life?".

We can have all the campaigns and charity events in the world but it is a bit odd to do that on one hand and then have these nigh-on set in stone expectations for young men as well. I can't comment about how it is for women obviously but i would imagine a decent amount of them feel the same.

this a hundred percent.

s4uv3

PMBC wrote: »

I agree; it is in a lot of cases particularly booze which is chemically a depressant.

I find it offensive the poster describing the midlands as 'a dismal kip' particularly kip since it means brothel. Towns like Edenderry, Portarlington, Monasterevin do have their visual and social problems but beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Once a poet talked about the beauty in a rose and another of the beauty of small things. We all need to be educated to see that beauty, at least occasionally.

Beauty has little to do with it imo. It's more about the repressive feel of some small towns and villages. I grew up in one such village, moving to a larger, more prosperous town as a ten year old.
Even at that age I remember noticing the difference in the demeanour of my neighbours and even felt it myself. I suddenly had more 'options' than the "drag yourself through school and find a job in a factory and get hold of a husband" norm that I saw all around me.