Psych warfare with a narcissit

Simcard102

Ive being living with a narc for the last couple of months. I moved in at the start of october which is the build up to a "tough" time of year for me as i suffer from SAD. He is the first one ive encountered. Im 18 just moved away from home to a new city for work. He is 23.

Things were great for the first couple of weeks then he just turned into this horrible horrible person. He thinks he is better then everyone especially me it seems. All he ever talksabout is himself , its not even talking its just bragging. He barley acknowledges anything i ever have to say and takes criticism very badly. He thinks he is above most people, again it seems me especially. Puts me down, makes me feel inferior, stupid, not good enough etc. He also uses me and never returns favours. Ive lent him money a couple of times. One time when i was badly stuck i asked him for a lend. Of course i never got it even though he had plenty of money that week, he makes far more then me

He sucked every morsel of life i had left after the SAD and basically made my life miserable for the past few months.
Anyways the sun is out and im feeling good. I know his game now and want to go to war with him over the next week or 2 before i leave. What can i do that will bug him? Or make him feel like ****, or really piss him of? Ive seen stuff about narc rage on the web but he isint a very angry person as he is high 24/7 but i would love to see him lose it just for my entertainment.

He currently thinks were "friends" even though all he ever did was use and abuse me to make him feel superior and better. I would love to beat him to a pulp just to gloat over him and make him feel small but thats not me.

Anyways any tips on how to mess with him/piss him of over the next week or two before i move out, i want to go out with a bang. Im aware that he will fire back with all cylinders but im prepared his words can no longer hurt me.

I also noticed that when he fulfills his narc tendencys (Manipulates , evokes a reaction/emotion, succesfully promotes himself in front of people. Etc. you know the deal) his eyes roll back in his skull like someone rushing on mdma like Wtf is wrong with these people there like a **** stain on society.

DoYouEvenLift

narcissit

Dangerous Man

Put your fingers in him.

LadyAthame

Dangerous Man wrote: »

Put your fingers in him.

But which orifice though? You will need rubber gloves OP.

Just move out and leave him alone.

Dangerous Man

LadyAthame wrote: »

But which orifice though? You will need rubber gloves OP.

Just move out and leave him alone.

Anus.

Put your fingers in his anus OP.

Simcard102

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

narcissit

Thanks..

Macavity.

Kill his mother and send him a picture of you tea bagging her severed head. I wouldn't do anything else though, it's important not to go overboard in these situations.

Dangerous Man

Macavity. wrote: »

Kill his mother and send him a picture of you tea bagging her severed head. I wouldn't do anything else though, it's important not to go overboard in these situations.

He could put his fingers in the head.

LadyAthame

Dangerous Man wrote: »

Anus.

Put your fingers in his anus OP.

Men like that.

LadyAthame

Just forget about him. Don't get into these types of games. Wish him well let it go. Live well.

Simcard102

LadyAthame wrote: »

Just forget about him.

That is exactly what im going to do AFTER I move out.. You have no idea how horrible this guy is he actually made my life hell for the past couple of months. He basically laughed at me when I told him about SAD (big mistake) and has used it as a weapon against me on several occasions making it 100 times worse. He basically wiped out all of my self belief and confidence and left me socially anxious at work which made it very hard for me to mix well and make friends.

Ive gone through bad break ups, Got my head kicked in etc and can honestly say no one has ever hurt me near as much as this guy I HAVE to do something or else i will have a hard time forgetting about it.

DEFTLEFTHAND

As a narcissist he gets's a get a kick out of you being uncomfortable and complaining on message boards. 'Narcises' are usually also alpha males, you need to stand up to him and challenge his leadership of your social group.

Dangerous Man

Set fire to the house. If he has any pets kill them.

Simcard102

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

As a narcissist he gets's a get a kick out of you being uncomfortable and complaining on message boards. 'Narcises' are usually also alpha males, you need to stand up to him and challenge his leadership of your social group.

The only reason i made this thread was to find a way to get at him. Not to complain granted it does look like that now thanks to the first few replys i got. I was just trying to give more insight

Canis Lupus

Simcard102 wrote: »

That is exactly what im going to do AFTER I move out.. I HAVE to do something .

There you go.

Simcard102

Canis Lupus wrote: »

There you go.

If someone assaulted you on a daily basis would you just walk away and forget about it?

Its the same thing except its mental and emotional assault.

What do you make of the mdma rush thing how messed up is that?

Canis Lupus

Simcard102 wrote: »

If someone assaulted you on a daily basis would you just walk away and forget about it?

Its the same thing except its mental and emotional assault.

What do you make of the mdma rush thing how messed up is that?

I'd probably make a boards account and post about it online.

LadyAthame

Canis Lupus wrote: »

I'd probably make a boards account and post about it online.

No that is what narcissists do....hint hint op

LadyAthame

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

A'Narcises' are usually also alpha males,

No they are not.

Dangerous Man

I had the best idea so far.

Canis Lupus

You could also try vaguebooking.

Rantan

Op you are going to meet a lot of people you don't like over the course of your life. If this is going to be your reaction to each of them i worry for you. You need to learn better coping skills and not be so obsessive. The fact that you feel the need to "do something" and possibly something physical means you come across as a little aggressive, sorry but i don't have much sympathy for you as a result

Macavity.

Dangerous Man wrote: »

I had the best idea so far.

I liked the part where he puts his fingers in.

Simcard102

Canis Lupus wrote: »

I'd probably make a boards account and post about it online.

Good one...

My friends are all basically kids like me with F.A experience of the real world they wouldnt be able to help. I didnt even know they existed until i googled his symptoms the other day. And im not going to worry my family members so ya the best thing i came up with was to post here.

Best thing i thought of was to "randomly" show him this interesting article on narcisissm and then tell him thats exactly what you are. And that he is the most vile person ive ever met, rot in hell GOODBYE.

evolving_doors

just change all the tea and coffee to decaf and watch his world implode.

Then just move out, and let it gooooo. like the song advises

Timberrrrrrrr

Simcard102 wrote: »

Good one...

My friends are all basically kids like me with F.A experience of the real world they wouldnt be able to help. I didnt even know they existed until i googled his symptoms the other day. And im not going to worry my family members so ya the best thing i came up with was to post here.

Best thing i thought of was to "randomly" show him this interesting article on narcisissm and then tell him thats exactly what you are. And that he is the most vile person ive ever met, rot in hell GOODBYE.

Gonna give you some genuine advice here, take it or leave it the choice will be yours alone.

Walk away!

That's my advice, just walk away and forget this guy. If you see him on the street just breeze on by and ignore him. If he calls/texts/emails you just ignore him. Friends on facebook? Unfriend and continue with your life and just treat him as a minor inconvenience that has now disappeared. Honestly doing these things will bother him more than some petty revenge that will probably just end up getting you into a potentially violent situation.

Simcard102

Rantan wrote: »

Op you are going to meet a lot of people you don't like over the course of your life. If this is going to be your reaction to each of them i worry for you. You need to learn better coping skills and not be so obsessive. The fact that you feel the need to "do something" and possibly something physical means you come across as a little aggressive, sorry but i don't have much sympathy for you as a result

You know what your right, thanks for the post best one yet!
Its just hard when your faced with it everyday yano.

About the last bit.

""I would love to beat him to a pulp just to gloat over him and make him feel small but THATS NOT ME" I named the thread psych warfare for a reason i would never physically hurt anyone unless in defence.

JJJJNR

Have as little contact as possible with them, don't get into situations where you need to borrow money from them, talk to them, the less you can stimulate the better. Just look at them as meat bags from now on.

Tilly

You really need to get over it, you sound so immature. Move on and forget about him.

JJJJNR

Thats harsh, it can be hard for most people to handle narcissist personalities and they will leave you penniless if you are not aware of the behaviour traits. I think at 18 and being able to identify narcissistic behaviour shows a good level of maturity.

Simcard102

Timberrrrrrrr wrote: »

Gonna give you some genuine advice here, take it or leave it the choice will be yours alone.

Walk away!

That's my advice, just walk away and forget this guy. If you see him on the street just breeze on by and ignore him. If he calls/texts/emails you just ignore him. Friends on facebook? Unfriend and continue with your life and just treat him as a minor inconvenience that has now disappeared. Honestly doing these things will bother him more than some petty revenge that will probably just end up getting you into a potentially violent situation.

Thank you timber I think i will take it. Thanks for the genuine post fair play.

Simcard102

Tilly wrote: »

You really need to get over it, you sound so immature. Move on and forget about him.[/QUOTE

Great post thanks. Very considerate. I think you should re-read and actually put yourself in my shoes. I posted some pretty deep personal stuff. I agree with all of your points but you came across like a complete and utter.... and there was no need for it.

LadyAthame

Simcard102 wrote: »

Tilly;94975867]You really need to get over it, you sound so immature. Move on and forget about him.[/QUOTE

Great post thanks. Very considerate. I think you should re-read and actually put yourself in my shoes. I posted some pretty deep personal stuff. I agree with all of your points but you came across like a complete and utter.... and there was no need for it.

It's ah and you are a re reg troll.

padd b1975

I shared with an Australian once too OP.

Never again!!

Just get him to fall in love with you, you seem to be halfway there already.

Then, after living together as lovers for two years, go off with his best mate.

That'll show him.

bsloepro

I know how u feel. I know a guy exactly like this. I've known him for a long time and he uses that and plays on my loyalty to make me feel like I owe him a favour.
He's continually borrowed money in the past. Never to be seen again. He sells weed and coke for a living. I've been in and out of recovery, he knows this and uses drugs to try to manipulate people. You know its happening but its all done so nicely and politely that when you start getting paranoid or suspicious about it, you start thinking you're the bad one.
A common technique for acquiring a 'loan' is to get you out for a few pints, get you all nice and fuzzy, then rack out a couple of lines, get you high and then comes the proposition....I'm the sort of person if I say I'll do sometime I will try to....even if I was rubbered....and its a lot easier to agree to things when you are rubbered. This guy does this to everyone until they all walk away. The usual MO is to borrow cash off you..always says he has no money to pay you back, and then start chipping away at the debt with weed or whatever...making a buck on the profit.
The only only way to deal with these people is to walk away....they can't change and don't we to as them being like that gets them ahead in life.....and then they do actually feel like they are more important than anyone else.
Personally I walked away from my narcissist. He still owes me 500 quid. I've cut my losses. Changed my number. Blocked number on my new phone.
Read up on psychological manipulation techniques. You'll see their strategies and be in a better position to say no. Phrases like "does that seem fair to you". "What exactly is in this for me". "Would you be happy to accept that". Learn to say no. Narcs will do stuff like be really nice, make it look like they are helping you out, doing u a favour, then use this to get you to reciprocate.... And if you don't then it will be a case of "everything I did for you and now I need help, you are in a position to help and you won't".....IE guilt.
Get away asap but until then read and observe, be cagey and cautious in your dealings.....because they are devious at all times.

bsloepro

JJJJNR wrote: »

Thats harsh, it can be hard for most people to handle narcissist personalities and they will leave you penniless if you are not aware of the behaviour traits. I think at 18 and being able to identify narcissistic behaviour shows a good level of maturity.

Well said. I 100% agree with this. At 18 you are doing well to spot this.

beertons

Has he any mdma left? Get some off him, and party.

Gummy Panda

OP you ever seen Oz?

Well you need to do what they do in that to take control. Remember the weak must submit to the strong

Simcard102

Gummy Panda wrote: »

OP you ever seen Oz?

Well you need to do what they do in that to take control. Remember the weak must submit to the strong

No. Just looked it up there though sounds good ill give it a go this evening. Thats basically his exact thinking. He is strong, im weak. We actually had a row one day when I said everyone is equal regardless of status , wealth etc and he was having none of it. Links up with the narc thing pretty well.

Thanks for sharing your story beslopro hope your doing well.
Gonna read up on the manipulation stuff now sounds really interesting. Them phrases are definitely going to come in handy thanks! Cant wait to see what he makes of the new me.

expatinator

JJJJNR wrote: »

Thats harsh, it can be hard for most people to handle narcissist personalities and they will leave you penniless if you are not aware of the behaviour traits. I think at 18 and being able to identify narcissistic behaviour shows a good level of maturity.

I disagree.

A lot of people use the term narcissist to dehumanize people and turn minor character flaws into overarching evil personalities. It's a very black and white viewpoint and can excuse bad behavior on the users part.

Imo, the OP should take a step back and get out of the cabin fever mindset. Your stuck with this guy and his minor flaws are grating on you. Forget about him. Move on. Or take a petty revenge and steal his tea-bags.

LadyAthame

Simcard102 wrote: »

Gonna read up on the manipulation stuff now sounds really interesting. Them phrases are definitely going to come in handy thanks! Cant wait to see what he makes of the new me.

Just ..move ..on.

Genuine response. A strong person would just move on.

bsloepro

LadyAthame wrote: »

Just ..move ..on.

Genuine response. A strong person would just move on.

Not everyone is a strong person.

And yeah you can maybe make yourself but not overnight.

LadyAthame

bsloepro wrote: »

Not everyone is a strong person.

And yeah you can maybe make yourself but not overnight.

You can move on overnight.

bsloepro

LadyAthame wrote: »

You can move on overnight.

He has to live in the house for another two weeks.

Vowel Movement

Shít in the kettle before you leave.

zeffabelli

If he truly is a narcissist, and not just sustaining narcissitic value or affect, then you and everyone else are like a drug dealer to him, in that it is love/hate. They need the supply from you (known as narcissitic supply) so they love you for giving it to them but also hate the dependancy. They know this deep down.

Here is the running tape in his head "HOW DARE YOU." This is the permenent default response to the world around him.

The only strategy for coping with this until you finally cut off is to go what they call grey rock. It's a strategy for dealing with sociopaths, but it works with NPD also.

You need to make contact with you consistenty ungratifying until they get bored with you and disconnect themselves. Boredom is the goal. No reactions, zen indifference. Let them have moral victories. Monotonous responses, take all the blame "its not you its me" type of reply. And you do this so that you are no longer a target.

You don't have to mean any of it. It is a big fat lying act you are putting on to protect yourself until one of you slithers away.

LadyAthame

Walk around nekkid and play this music full blast on loop.

Serve him imaginary tea. Invite him to sit down and reprimand him for not thanking the chair. In fact all the furniture I bet he has never thought once to thank the chair. It's just for his 'use' just like all the other furniture.

Wear leaderhosen. Have fun .

I'm serious if you have to be around a narcissist you may as well have your fun.They can be great craic if you know you're leaving soon.

The narcissist finds it hard to exercise his sense of humour. Teach him! Lighten him up. Get it from a hard battle to a soft one. Put it in a format you like not one he likes. And don't be nasty.

It's not for everyone. I know. I'm odd.

anncoates

The great thing about life is the way it constantly throws up the same few agony column templates that seem tailor made perfect for 'legendary' AH threads.

Lux23

Has the guy any friends? How about you tell them all that you caught him to masturbating to a picture of his mother. And then move on.

LadyAthame

zeffabelli wrote: »

Here is the running tape in his head "HOW DARE YOU." This is the permenent default response to the world around him.

See the answer to that is.... How very very dare you!