comments about your appearance

Robsweezie

can you accept compliments and laugh at jokes about your appearance? do you mind people drawing attention to the way you look, either good or bad? I personally cant take compliments about it and find them awkward, I get embarrassed , but I appreciate their intention and don't mind it in the long run.

have you enough of a thick skin to shake off criticism or put downs about your looks?

bodice ripper

Nope.

Comments about my looks, particularly when I was young, seriously ****ed me up. I am not ashamed to say it.

Timberrrrrrrr

Couldn't give a flying **** what people think.

eviltwin

bodice ripper wrote: »

Nope.

Comments about my looks, particularly when I was young, seriously ****ed me up. I am not ashamed to say it.

Ditto. I can take a compliment - just about - although part of me still thinks its a set up for a joke. But I'm getting better at it. I used to get a lot of negative comments about my looks from a certain section of my family and still get the odd one or two even now. Its messed me up but its easier to cope with the older you get.

nullzero

It's typically gormless morons who make innappropriate comments about people's looks, usually says more about them than the people they are complimenting or critiquing.

4zn76tysfajdxp

People only comment on my appearance when they're complimenting me. I'm pretty good looking.

PandaPoo

I'm not too keen on taking compliments, but if someone made a joke about my appearance or took the piss out of me I'd be the first to laugh. Genuinely have no problem with it, unless it's said with malice

punisher5112

When someone says something that even might be hurtful always great when you reply thanks so much and say another thing about your own appearance and they do be lost.

Depends on the comments, and on how original or flattering they are. I try to laugh them off. I've noticed my petiteness is usually mentioned in a way designed not to sound like a put-down, when that's what it's obviously intended to be.

I'm small but I'm mighty, I'll have you know.

I'm always happy to receive compliments, and make a point of thanking people for being kind enough to say something nice.

With other people, I don't say anything at all if I can't say something nice.

Sleveile

Timberrrrrrrr wrote: »

Couldn't give a flying **** what people think.

+1,couldn't care less what people think, and care even less to what they say.

I'm happy with me and its no one elses business.

The_Valeyard

Need to be able to have a laugh at yourself and not take life to seriously.

Renegade Mechanic

"Don't ever look for work in child minding or wear a priest's collar. Ya wouldn't quite have the head for it".

In fairness, I nearly cried laughing

Peregrine

I think you're all lookin' well

Sheep Lover

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

"Don't ever look for work in child minding or wear a priest's collar. Ya wouldn't quite have the head for it".

In fairness, I nearly cried laughing

A picture of you hanging over the mantlepiece will keep the chaps away from the fire though, there's always a bright side.

Ah, you gotta laugh off the comments. It's the only option really, when the auld bossums have sprouted, the guy has spilled over the belt line, and you've a head on ya like sunburnt Luke Kelly tribute act you can't be too sensitive.

Crying would only make it worse, I'd be fierce ugly cryer alright.

I think I'd probably laugh harder at a compliment, would be wondering what planet that person was on!

4zn76tysfajdxp

Deleted User wrote: »

I think I'd probably laugh harder at a compliment, would be wondering what planet that person was on!

They were probably pulled into your orbit by gravity.

Renegade Mechanic

Vincent Scary Prizefight wrote: »

They were probably pulled into your orbit by gravity.

The slingshot maneuver around your head was a huge help, in fairness. Cheers!

Frigga_92

Nah, I can't handle any comments, it doesn't matter whether they're good or bad. I had some really ****ty stuff said to me when I was younger and it's just made it impossible for me to accept any comments on my appearance.

Vincent Scary Prizefight

Vincent Scary Prizefight wrote: »

They were probably pulled into your orbit by gravity.

You laugh them off but it really does say a lot about the people making the comments. An awful lot.

There must be something lacking in their own pathetic lives that they feel they have to take it out on those who didn't fall off a catwalk in Milan.

It's also important to remember, self praise is no praise at all :rolleyes:

Aongus Von Bismarck

It's a rather nasty thing to comment on a person's appearance to their face. I was out with my brother and a few of his friends over Christmas. They were getting involved in the usual tiresome banter they use in lieu of actually discussing things that really matter. Like their careers to be honest. Anyway, one of them, only 32, was letting the other chaps know that he was recently put on medication. He was trying to be serious, and I felt rather sorry for him as he was obviously worried. Some witless smark alek then remarked: "well you always looked like a brillo pad with high blood pressure". The other lads fell about the place guffawing and snorting like it was the funniest thing they had ever heard. None of them exactly specimens of good breeding and healthy living themselves it must be said (not to their face obviously).

hatrickpatrick

Mostly yes, cgaf about mockery and take compliments pretty well. However, when I hit puberty too early and my body wasn't ready for the massive blast of testosterone, I had an aromatase spike and ended up with gynecomastia (pointy, protruding nipples like miniature boobs), which I'm currently sorting out using anti-estrogen and anti-prolactin medication and supplements. Being referred to as "tits" throughout my teenage years really, really f*cked me up and made me genuinely believe no woman would ever find me attractive, to the point at which I'm far more self conscious about my puffy nips than about my weiner size, which is most lads' go-to point of insecurity.

I'm slightly less self conscious about it now. Having a girlfriend a while ago who far from being repulsed by them, simply found them a handy place to attach a couple of sharp-toothed, flickable clothespins when I'd done something bold certainly helped

Renegade Mechanic

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

It's a rather nasty thing to comment on a person's appearance to their face. I was out with my brother and a few of his friends over Christmas. They were getting involved in the usual tiresome banter they use in lieu of actually discussing things that really matter. Like their careers to be honest. Anyway, one of them, only 32, was letting the other chaps know that he was recently put on medication. He was trying to be serious, and I felt rather sorry for him as he was obviously worried. Some witless smark alek then remarked: "well you always looked like a brillo pad with high blood pressure". The other lads fell about the place guffawing and snorting like it was the funniest thing they had ever heard. None of them exactly specimens of good breeding and healthy living themselves it must be said (not to their face obviously).

You wouldn't last very long on a site or workshop floor then. Good lord, one must be as quick, as they are thick skinned.. I find it a good quality, actually. To be able to take, and cleverly retort, shows a very good problem solving/solution finding brain in my opinion. I would have far less respect for anyone who would actively speak of someone "not to their face, obviously".

Aongus Von Bismarck

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

You wouldn't last very long on a site or workshop floor then.

Thankfully my educational and career choices mean I don't have to work on a site or workshop floor. Small mercies then that I'm spared the witless ignorance and hectoring laughter of men who think that calling someone a "fat bastard" is the very height of improvised comedy.

Clandestine

I don't get many comments about my appearance. Maybe that's a good thing? I think I look so average that I end up fading into the background a little.

Pwindedd

I was quite an awkward teenager and cruel people used to take advantage of this and rip strips off me, but over time I've grown in confidence and I now feel quite good about myself. 40 now and I get quite a few people telling me I look good for my age and my husband thinks I'm getting better looking as the years go by which is lovely. Being a girl (mature lady?)helps though, I'd imagine lads get a rough time of it no matter their age.

Renegade Mechanic

Aongus Von Bismarck wrote: »

Thankfully my educational and career choices mean I don't have to work on a site or workshop floor. Small mercies then that I'm spared the witless ignorance and hectoring laughter of men who think that calling someone a "fat bastard" is the very height of improvised comedy.

Rest assured, it's much, much smarter than you know. "Office Politics" are the worst kind of "small mercy" in that situation. Your appearance is literally everything in that world, moreso than the qualities that should earn someone their place. On the floor, bad comments about appearance generally result in laughter. In a cubicle, it generally results in restrained frustration and eventually job losses. There are many, many things I don't envy and being in such a place is surely one.

toastedpickles

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

You wouldn't last very long on a site or workshop floor then. Good lord, one must be as quick, as they are thick skinned.. I find it a good quality, actually. To be able to take, and cleverly retort, shows a very good problem solving/solution finding brain in my opinion. I would have far less respect for anyone who would actively speak of someone "not to their face, obviously".

This here, I've heard tales of the abuse given in work shops, but ive yet to come across much of it myself, friend of mine works in dublin bus and he said he had an awful time of it in his first year there, granted ive gotten a bit here and there but a good threat usually does the trick i found, for instance this has instant results "say that to me again and I'll shove this spanner up so far your arse you'l be sh1tting metal for a week...ya cnut" :pac:

On topic though I'd be wary of people saying nice things to me, but it depends on the person who says it

Señor Fancy Pants

It's not something that has ever bothered me.

I'm only a little lad, grey hair and newly sport a pair or spectacles.

Every now and again when someone can't remember my name I hear "Here, little grey, Speccy bastard"

But that's grand

clappyhappy

I worked in the Middle East and when I would return from my holidays at home, my Filipino and Indian chefs used to say to me, “ah chef you got fat". Might have put up a pound nothing extreme.

They never held back in telling you if you had gained weight, but there was never anything malicious meant.

pauliebdub

I'm not mad about personal comments, my head, particularly around my scalp is scarred from.a childhood accident Leaving noticible marks especially visible when my hair is tight. It's not a major issue but I'm.surprised at how often people make comments on it.

Almost every day someone comments on my appearance. No exaggeration. Either that I've lost weight or that my dress is nice or did I get my hair done. It's really weird.

I wore coloured lip gloss to work one day and the lads ripped the piss out if me. Course I laughed. Then took off the lip gloss!!

cloud493

I already know I'm an ugly unappealing to look at gargoyle. Don't care what people think or say.

Renegade Mechanic

toastedpickles wrote: »

On topic though I'd be wary of people saying nice things to me, but it depends on the person who says it

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Almost every day someone comments on my appearance. No exaggeration. Either that I've lost weight or that my dress is nice or did I get my hair done. It's really weird.

^^ These. My god there's nothing more suspicious, imo, than repeated complements. Its always either someone looking for something, or far worse, playing the long game with you.

That's not to say I deal with such things every day now
Seriously though, go way to f*ck with that and fool someone else.

Renegade Mechanic

Renegade Mechanic wrote: »

^^ These. My god there's nothing more suspicious, imo, than repeated complements. Its always either someone looking for something, or far worse, playing the long game with you.

That's not to say I deal with such things every day now
Seriously though, go way to f*ck with that and fool someone else.

Rarely the same person, although regularly one guy in work who has a major crush on me for quite some time, he has actually text me to compliment me if I've just walked by him. That's a bit fcuked up. Lovely fella like, but seriously.

Saipanne

I tend to blush, when people compliment my looks, even though I'm quite confident about the way I look.

Menas

I dont get many compliments. I think that is because I am so devilishly handsome that it goes with out saying.

Renegade Mechanic

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Rarely the same person, although regularly one guy in work who has a major crush on me for quite some time, he has actually text me to compliment me if I've just walked by him. That's a bit fcuked up. Lovely fella like, but seriously.

I just want you to love me like

RDM_83 again

Get a lot of comparisons to Breaking Bad guy (unfortunately not jessi pinkman :-/ ) to the point that I often preempt it because its just boring/annoying at this stage.
I don't really mind it with guys because if its done in a slagging way you can always throw something back and its safe enough, can't really do the same with women (unless I know them and know they can take it) because thats a minefield.
Its weird how a random stranger can point out that you really are properly bald but be oblivious to the fact that they are grossly overweight :mad:

This being said its just annoyance and not something I take to heart, have a fairly good body image and since becoming single have done well with the opposite sex but even if I didn't I would hope I wouldn't care because its a certain type of asshole that makes negative comments about someone they don't know at all.

KatW4

No I don't. Iwas called some horrible names when I was younger due to being really skinny and wearing glasses. It takes me a long time to accept a compliment now. I didn't accept them from my bf for nearly a year.

I don't think people realise what nasty comments can do to a person unless they experience it themselves.

KatW4

KatW4 wrote: »

No I don't. Iwas called some horrible names when I was younger due to being really skinny and wearing glasses. It takes me a long time to accept a compliment now. I didn't accept them from my bf for nearly a year.

I don't think people realise what nasty comments can do to a person unless they experience it themselves.

I was called horrible horrible names when I was a kid. I had boobs and hips from a young age, despite being tiny, I was called fat, and slagged about a gap in my teeth. Now it appears that people like my tooth gap and my hips and tits but still I feel like that fat ugly 11 year old child, and probably always will.

gormdubhgorm

Robsweezie wrote: »

can you accept compliments and laugh at jokes about your appearance? do you mind people drawing attention to the way you look, either good or bad? I personally cant take compliments about it and find them awkward, I get embarrassed , but I appreciate their intention and don't mind it in the long run.

have you enough of a thick skin to shake off criticism or put downs about your looks?

No I am male! We don't get compliments. We call each other fat baldy bastards from one extreme, or shapers to the other extreme.:D

Ruu

I find it awkward to know what to respond but that is the same with compliments or praise in general.

One eyed Jack

Compliments about my appearance are rare and few between so I take 'em when I get 'em

I prefer self-depreciation and a good humoured back and forth bit of a laugh with other people than I could be bothered listening to arse kissers.

If someone looks good, then I might comment on their appearance, if they don't look too fresh I prefer to hold my tongue, unless they ask, and then I'll try and be as polite as possible about it. They usually know me well enough to know I'd never mean anything malicious, people have told me they appreciate my honest opinion.

Reading through this thread though, I'm not sure if they were just being polite now too

66ad

eviltwin wrote: »

Ditto. I can take a compliment - just about - although part of me still thinks its a set up for a joke. But I'm getting better at it. I used to get a lot of negative comments about my looks from a certain section of my family and still get the odd one or two even now. Its messed me up but its easier to cope with the older you get.

Are you an identical twin? I use too hate getting compared.

Just guessing your a twin by your using name, sorry if I'm wrong.

hatrickpatrick

Deleted User wrote: »

I wore coloured lip gloss to work one day and the lads ripped the piss out if me. Course I laughed. Then took off the lip gloss!!

What colour was it? Because if it was green or yellow or something, they had a point

KatW4

Deleted User wrote:

I was called horrible horrible names when I was a kid. I had boobs and hips from a young age, despite being tiny, I was called fat, and slagged about a gap in my teeth. Now it appears that people like my tooth gap and my hips and tits but still I feel like that fat ugly 11 year old child, and probably always will.

How cruel! I bet you are a million times better than them in every way.

I know what you mean about feeling like the bullied child still. The very people who called me 4 eyes in school are now the idiots walking around with fake glasses because they look cool. I take my glasses off on nights out and for pictures too because someone once said to me "boys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses". (thankfully didn't turn out to be true!) I thought I must have been the ugliest person in the world after that comment.

Nasty comments are the ones you will remember and will affect you the most.

hatrickpatrick

hatrickpatrick wrote: »

What colour was it? Because if it was green or yellow or something, they had a point

Oh it was just pink. Bright pink. I never wear lipstick and they said it was like when homer did Marge's make up with the gun :pac:

lukesmom

I've put on close to 3 stone inside 18 months from a medication I have to take for the time being.

I get doors opened for me, stuff lifted etc... When am I due my baby? I usually answer im not pregnant just fat. But yeah I look bigger and it's obvious to anyone who sees me so they usually say 'your looking well' -well fed more like!

KatW4

KatW4 wrote: »

How cruel! I bet you are a million times better than them in every way.

I know what you mean about feeling like the bullied child still. The very people who called me 4 eyes in school are now the idiots walking around with fake glasses because they look cool. I take my glasses off on nights out and for pictures too because someone once said to me "boys don't make passes at girls who wear glasses". (thankfully didn't turn out to be true!) I thought I must have been the ugliest person in the world after that comment.

Nasty comments are the ones you will remember and will affect you the most.

Thankfully I'm not bitter about the comments made, scarred a little perhaps, but not bitter. We were all just kids after all. Better just to learn from it and to teach your kids to have empathy for others, may as well take the positives from it wherever possible.

One eyed Jack

lukesmom wrote: »

I've put on close to 3 stone inside 18 months from a medication I have to take for the time being.

I get doors opened for me, stuff lifted etc... When am I due my baby? I usually answer im not pregnant just fat. But yeah I look bigger and it's obvious to anyone who sees me so they usually say 'your looking well' -well fed more like!

I fell into that trap once, jesus the ground could've swallowed me up and I'd still have tried to dig my way to Australia!

She took it well though, thank fcuk!

Unless you can see the baby's head, never ask a woman when she's due :pac:

(Sorry lukesmom!)