Best porn movie scenarios?

Nucular Arms

whupdedo wrote: »

I just wonder who the fcuk wants to believe that they're watching father and daughter or mother and son getting to know each other better by suckin on each others genitals

PizzamanIRL

I love the scenes where the male inserts his penis into the females vagina several times at a rapid pace.

AndonHandon

One where a group of Indian men roam around the countryside in some Scandanavian country or maybe Japan and a group of local females attack them and violate their orifices with various instruments.

Wacker The Attacker

Where husband and wife come home from the pub on a saturday night and are three sheets to the wind and decide to test out some of their messed up thoughts on each other:

(1) Can you take a drag off a cigarette with your sphinc\fanny?

(2) Can cold curry sauce be used as lube? Both\either front and back door.

(3) If you thrust you fully erect member into a block of ice, how long does it take to lose your hard on?

(4) How many balls (and I dont mean testicles) can you fit into a vajayjay? Snooker, Baseballs and cricket balls appear the most challenging although I have it on good authority that particular female has stuffed a fully inflated american football into her hoohah

It'd like a banned episode of mythbusters.

kowloon

I once penned a script for an adult movie, but apparently the world isn't ready for Schindler's Dick.

FloatingVoter

Irvine Welsh of Trainspotting fame has already written the book on this

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Porno-Mark-Renton-Book-3-ebook/dp/B0038LB4RG/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1425519200&sr=1-1&keywords=porno+irvine+welsh

7 Rides For 7 Brothers. Sickboy is in charge of "auditioning" the actresses. Should be on your screens shortly.

Egginacup

DavidRamsay99 wrote: »

I like the scenario of some black dude who cruises into a rich white neighborhood to burglarize and discovers bored housewives whose rich husbands are out working?

What do you guys like?

Would an Irish porn movie involve an Irish traveler being hired by a rich executive living in a D4 residence to cut back his overgrown trees and hedges who has a hot wife or daughters?

A few ISIS guys spit-roasting you.

eternal

Egginacup wrote: »

A few ISIS guys spit-roasting you.

^^^

Littlekittylou

You don't have much imagination do you guys?

Cake Man

A young, naive JobBridge intern gets pummelled by her boss in a bid to secure a permanent position.
Manager has his way with her and then tells her there are no permanent positions. The title of the porno: "Getting fcuked both ways"

Jesus Wept

DavidRamsay99 wrote: »

I like the scenario of some black dude who cruises into a rich white neighborhood to burglarize and discovers bored housewives whose rich husbands are out working?

What do you guys like?

Would an Irish porn movie involve an Irish traveler being hired by a rich executive living in a D4 residence to cut back his overgrown trees and hedges who has a hot wife or daughters?

DavidRamsay99 wrote: »

How about ICA women taking art classes and doing a reverse gangbang with the male nude model?

A group of British paratroopers catch a female IRA terrorist and interrogate her?

Reverse in what sense? You mean that gangbangs are meant to be men on women. Like 'reverse sexism' a 'reverse racism'.

Anyhow, I do approve of your thread topic.

Jesus Wept

Cake Man wrote: »

A young, naive JobBridge intern gets pummelled by her boss in a bid to secure a permanent position.
Manager has his way with her and then tells her there are no permanent positions. The title of the porno: "Getting fcuked both ways"

This is genius. Well done.

expatinator

AndonHandon wrote: »

One where a group of Indian men roam around the countryside in some Scandanavian country or maybe Japan and a group of local females attack them and violate their orifices with various instruments.

Why Japan?


Let me see. Aha, I have a scenario.

It is a hot day in September. The air is sticky, the sky molten, but not as fevered as the people's loins. Tensions rise. Words gush out in in an unending stream, and leave the whole country slick with emotion.

The battle is reaching it's climax. The final moan, the final gasp, the final pounding that they will give each other. The end is here. But it'll be a long one. Filled with long ones.

Church VS State: The final climax.

Littlekittylou

Littlekittylou wrote: »

You don't have much imagination do you guys?

Ejaculate some of your best outputs onto the thread for us then

magentis

Has to be fake taxi over on youporn.

NachoBusiness

I'm more of a Woodman castings guy myself. 'What do you do in the life?' The sheer amount of babealicious Hungarians he manages to have swing by his office looking to be DP'd is staggering. Don't accept any substitutes. Pierre is the original casting agent. First guy to record them. A friend told me. I personally wouldn't watch such filth.

As for porn scenarios. Can't beat a bit of Kay Parker having wet dreams all night about orgies and the like and then in morning unable to bear seeing her son naked and so devours him as he sleeps. In fairness, her best friend had told her she needed to shag her son, as she has shagged hers (Taboo I or II, can't remember which). Seen them first on VHS. There was a guy on the northside of Dublin who used to go around with a video shop in the back. £5 for ten films for a week.

Google'ing 'Damn sexy Kay Parker seducing her son' should find you the scene. NSFW etc etc.

The best thing about those Taboo films was that invariably the guys playing the "kids" were older than, or at least not far of the age of, the women playing the moms. 70s porn rocked.

StewartGriffin

Littlekittylou wrote: »

You don't have much imagination do you guys?

How about sexy mature lady challenges a room full of dick-waving alpha males to pleasure her in an imaginative and creative way? But the only one who pleases her is a skinny bald guy who was only there to fix the wifi connection, (but he's a writer in his spare time.)
Kind of like cinderella, but with guys, and a vagina instead of a slipper, actually now I think of it, it's not like cinderella at all.

What does the winner get?

Willfarman

Irish Agri porn. It just hasn't been done yet.
The possible scenarios are endless!

With real girls now with real vaginas. The market for beastiality would be limited enough i would imagine..

StewartGriffin

"Organic Orgasms" a tale of free-range sex in the West of Ireland.

Vinculus

Jesus, Mary and Josephine


A young lady is praying at the most holy and miraculous shrine of Ballinspittle in the beautiful county of Cork.
The young lady finds herself extremely attracted and aroused by the statue of our holy mother. The young lady cant help her self and begins to reach under her long skirt and touch her self in the most sinful of ways.
Our holy mother Mary is awakened for the first time in many a year by the gentle moans of the young lady.
Our most holy of Mother is at first shocked by this little Jezebel touching her privates at her feet but after a time she too starts to feel like she hasn't felt in a long time.
Her hand goes under her long blue robes.
After an orgasm or two later she descends down to the young lady and they start going at it like a couple brazen hussies.
Unbeknown to them at the time Jesus is watching the show from behind a bush.
His hand goes under his caftan and he begins to pull at his holy member while watching his mum and the little tramp do the bad thing,
After a while he walks over and exclaims " Ma, what in the name of God are you up to?"
Our blessed mother replies "Aw Jesus, shut up and give your mother a kiss"
A threesome begins.
God,our holy father upon high is watching from above. "What in hell is going on down there" he shouts .
Everybody laughs.

fade to Black

StewartGriffin

Vinculus wrote: »

Jesus, Mary and Josephine


A young lady is praying at the most holy and miraculous shrine of Ballinspittle in the beautiful county of Cork.
The young lady finds herself extremely attracted and aroused by the statue of our holy mother. The young lady cant help her self and begins to reach under her long skirt and touch her self in the most sinful of ways.
Our holy mother Mary is awakened for the first time in many a year by the gentle moans of the young lady.
Our most holy of Mother is at first shocked by this little Jezebel touching her privates at her feet but after a time she too starts to feel like she hasn't felt in a long time.
Her hand goes under her long blue robes.
After an orgasm or two later she descends down to the young lady and they start going at it like a couple brazen hussies.
Unbeknown to them at the time Jesus is watching the show from behind a bush.
His hand goes under his caftan and he begins to pull at his holy member while watching his mum and the little tramp do the bad thing,
After a while he walks over and exclaims " Ma, what in the name of God are you up to?"
Our blessed mother replies "Aw Jesus, shut up and give your mother a kiss"
A threesome begins.
God,our holy father upon high is watching from above. "What in hell is going on down there" he shouts .
Everybody laughs.

fade to Black

Of course, it would have to be called "The Second Cumming."

Wacker The Attacker

kowloon wrote: »

I once penned a script for an adult movie, but apparently the world isn't ready for Schindler's Dick.

It may be ready for schindlers fist though.

Vinculus

StewartGriffin wrote: »

Of course, it would have to be called "The Second Cumming."

That's perfect for the sequel " Jesus, Mary, Mary and Josephine"

We have been writing a porn script for awhile now which we joke we will film sometime with some friends and some other people. Its set in medieval times - and since I only read a little of Game Of Thrones for the first time recently - I have realised our scripts are basically Game Of Thrones without the magic and dragons. It has all the rest of the political intrigue and overt incest and sexual exploitation and everything else you can find in those books

Even got as far as casting over half of the roles in it too - which has made it a little more real

kowloon

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

It may be ready for schindlers fist though.

Feck, why didn't I think of that title?! I can't word properly.

Baby Jane

Father jumping his daughter, mother jumping her son, the JobBridge thing, American Psycho the book... fairly rapey "best" scenarios.
Maybe they're meant as jokes though.