what is the funniest insult you have ever heard?

Kesly

*not made for you guys to insult each other (or me)*
I just like to laugh.

AnonoBoy

Doo-doo head.

Kesly

AnonoBoy wrote: »

Doo-doo head.

Lol! That is my top ten too

Justin Credible Darts

you are too thick to be a full fool

MyPeopleDrankTheSoup

from the mouth (or pen) of Roy Keane

"On a night we got beaten in the cup by Luton, the staff came in and said, ‘Clive Clarke has had a heart attack at Leicester’.”I said, ‘Is he OK? I’m shocked they found one, you could never tell by the way he plays’."

wait, that's not an insult is it? well it's funny and I went to the bother of copying and pasting so I'm clicking post

ProudDUB

Back in the day, Winston Churchill and Nancy Astor had a particularly heated debate in the House of Commons. He wouldn't budge on a particular point of order.

In sheer frustration, she told him " Winston, if you were my husband, I would put poison in your tea ! ".

To which he replied "Madam, if I were your husband, I would happily drink it."

Always thought it was an effing deadly put down.

Karpackie

There used to be a really great forum for that. Disappeared now. Genuine lols. Flutterinbantam, Degsy, Creepingdeath, Captain Darling, Sergeant, Bronte, Slidey, Sauve, Fulton Crown, Later10, More Tea Vicar. A hundred thousand posts of people posting ****ty insults at each other.

MadYaker

Your soul is dog sh!t

Kesly

MadYaker wrote: »

Your soul is dog sh!t

I am particularly fond of putting nouns in front of the word c*nt.
Swampc*nt, Thunderc*unt etc...

Sheep Lover

Cnut features is a personal favourite

osarusan

In a rather hostile debate on another forum, a poster ended an aggressive post with the words 'so bite me sac.'

I haven't laughed so much in a long time.

AnonoBoy

Karpackie wrote: »

There used to be a really great forum for that. Disappeared now. Genuine lols. Flutterinbantam, Degsy, Creepingdeath, Captain Darling, Sergeant, Bronte, Slidey, Sauve, Fulton Crown, Later10, More Tea Vicar. A hundred thousand posts of people posting ****ty insults at each other.

You're really giving away your secret rereg status here buddy.

The Backwards Man

You're hole's a baler!

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

Fly up me hole

muff03

Sh*tsucker. Definitely an original when I heard it anyway!

Kesly

AnonoBoy wrote: »

You're really giving away your secret rereg status here buddy.

quick question... what is a rereg?

fleet_admiral

The best part of you ran down your mothers leg

Your mother should have swallowed you

Sheep Lover

You've a head on ya like a well slapped spastic child.

There was a thread about this last year or longer ago, be chance I happened upon it the other night, titled something like "Wouldn't ride her into battle, she has a face like a bag of bent euros". Will search for it in a bit if no one beats me to it.

fleet_admiral

If I had 13 mickeys I wouldn't give her the unlucky one

If I had a garden full of mickeys I wouldn't let her look over the wall.

I hope she gets cancer of the gee. (What my father in law said about margeret thatcher)

Overheal

Justin Credible Darts

my alltime favorite

go fuk yerself

nadey

You fat stupid bitch

Thought it was hilarious as I was 7 months pregnant in size 12 jeans
And the person who said it was 15 year old no education no job no father for her child

She's not pregnant with her second child and a different father for the baby

KeithM89

Anything by this guy:

Or this:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NwvjPlcC3w

Kesly

pics or gtfo!!
What do you people look like? lol
this is me

bodhrandude

I remember this drunken moron who was annoying me and a mate in a bar in Galway, my mate replied to him: 'He who has nothing to say will say it loud and long.'

eric prydz

You should have thrown out along with the condom.

Kesly

My favorite is still your mom should have swallowed you for sure...

Yogosan

If all the village idiots left their villages and formed their own village of idiots. You would be their village idiot.

Summer wind

Your vagina has been used more than google.

Peregrine

Deleted User wrote: »

There was a thread about this last year or longer ago, be chance I happened upon it the other night, titled something like "Wouldn't ride her into battle, she has a face like a bag of bent euros". Will search for it in a bit if no one beats me to it.

I remember these two that follow a similar template..

"A face of a bulldog sniffing piss off a nettle"

"A fanny like a stab wound on the back of a gorrilla" - sorry

Kesly

Summer wind wrote: »

Your vagina has been used more than google.

I JUST ALMOST PISSED MYSELF!!!

tampopo

a work colleague said of a customer/member of the public, "I'd say he pees sitting down".

letsgetloud

my favourite would probably be " I wouldn't get up on her to get over the mountjoy wall".

Cantona's Collars

"You should be tied to a cows tail and scuttered to death"

KomradeBishop

"Tbh, I'd love to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my arse."

Insect Overlord

KomradeBishop wrote: »

"Tbh, I'd love to see things from your point of view, but I can't get my head that far up my arse."

A friend of mine got a suspension from school, back in the day, for saying that to our principal.

Kesly

So, it has just been brought to my attention just how small Ireland really is by one of my dear facebook friends . How many of you guys do you think actually know each other and don't know it?

greedygoblin

Kesly wrote: »

quick question... what is a rereg?

Rereg = someone who has closed their account and re-registered with a new name.

Kesly

greedygoblin wrote: »

Rereg = someone who has closed their account and re-registered with a new name.

THANK YOU! lol. nobody ever answers my questions on here /:

Summer wind

What's the difference between you and a rooster? The rooster says "cock a doodle doo but you say "any cock"ll do.

Kesly

Summer wind wrote: »

What's the difference between you and a rooster? The rooster says "cock a doodle doo but you say "any cock"ll do.

I love you. lets get married. lol
(even if you are a girl.. we can do it in California)

Knex*

Your dog hates you

Kesly

Knex. wrote: »

Your dog hates you

I would be so sad if someone sai this to me. ):

Pat Mustard

Kesly wrote: »

I am particularly fond of putting nouns in front of the word c*nt.
Swampc*nt, Thunderc*unt etc...

Reminds me of this:

(offensive language, etc etc.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy7kb5ABsyk

Kesly

The Mustard wrote: »

Reminds me of this:

(offensive language, etc etc.)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy7kb5ABsyk

OHMYGOD! Lol!!!!
Win (:

Knex*

Kesly wrote: »

I would be so sad if someone sai this to me. ):

One of my mates said it to me on a night out after I took the piss out of him for something, and I've rarely laughed as much :pac:

Summer wind

I would call you a c*unt but you don't have the warmth or the depth!

Pat Mustard

Another classic Malcolm Tucker insult:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aa-LSJBraXE

Juan More Time

He/She has a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp:D

bodhrandude

This had me in stitches, Nadine's put down of Ado in the season 5 finale of Love/Hate: 'Shurrup to fcuk you fat fukin pr1ck.'