2 Day wedding-Saving the Halloween theme for Day 2

Dolbert

Tarzana wrote: »

Pretty much unheard of. They always strike me as OTT, and must be a very costly extra for the marrying couple or their parents. Seems unnecessary, who needs to rehearse dinner?

We had the ceremony rehearsal the night before with the bridal party and immediate family. We all then went for dinner back at the hotel and chatted til near midnight, it was a nice way to settle nerves before the whole thing. It's rarely an actual rehearsal of dinner if that makes sense.

Neyite

Tarzana wrote: »

Pretty much unheard of. They always strike me as OTT, and must be a very costly extra for the marrying couple or their parents. Seems unnecessary, who needs to rehearse dinner?

I got it wrong then! I always thought it was a rehearsal in the church or ceremony venue - who stands where, finding out your cues from the celebrant, and then the dinner afterwards was just a follow on from that. Do some people actually rehearse the dinner? I have a really funny image in my head of a heap of adults eating imaginary food :pac:

January

Neyite wrote: »

I got it wrong then! I always thought it was a rehearsal in the church or ceremony venue - who stands where, finding out your cues from the celebrant, and then the dinner afterwards was just a follow on from that. Do some people actually rehearse the dinner? I have a really funny image in my head of a heap of adults eating imaginary food :pac:

Americans do!

Hold the Cheez Whiz

Neyite wrote: »

I got it wrong then! I always thought it was a rehearsal in the church or ceremony venue - who stands where, finding out your cues from the celebrant, and then the dinner afterwards was just a follow on from that. Do some people actually rehearse the dinner? I have a really funny image in my head of a heap of adults eating imaginary food :pac:

January wrote: »

Americans do!

I'm American, and I've been to many rehearsal dinners, and they tend to be more the former than the latter! But some people invite all of the out of town guests to the dinner part, and that's where it can get expensive (although the norm is for the groom's family to host the rehearsal dinner). Many people keep it pretty low key though (pizza, barbecue at someone's house), and it is a nice way to catch up with people before all of the activity of the wedding day.

Neyite

January wrote: »

Americans do!

Whaaaat??

"ok, now you lift your knife and cut into your imaginary beef, add a bit of imaginary carrot to your fork and put in your mouth. Chew it seven times, and swallow"

:pac:

cactusgal

January wrote: »

Americans do!

Uh, no we don't.

The USA is a massive country and families/close friends often lives miles apart, and don't get to see each other often. The rehearsal dinner is a chance for them to spend more time together. The wedding party does a quick run-thru (rehearsal) of the ceremony in the church and then close friends and family join them for dinner.

It's usually a day or two before the wedding, to give people more time to hang out. It's essentially the same idea as the "second day" bbq at some Irish weddings, but with a smaller group, just the nearest and dearest, so I don't know why people would consider it OTT.

My brother had a buffet dinner at an Italian restaurant for the bridal party and family/extended family from Ireland and it was a lovely, chilled night with amazing food!

Tarzana

cactusgal wrote: »

It's usually a day or two before the wedding, to give people more time to hang out. It's essentially the same idea as the "second day" bbq at some Irish weddings, but with a smaller group, just the nearest and dearest, so I don't know why people would consider it OTT.

Well... lots of people consider the next day shindig OTT.

Gatica

cactusgal wrote: »

My brother had a buffet dinner at an Italian restaurant for the bridal party and family/extended family from Ireland and it was a lovely, chilled night with amazing food!

That's the same idea for the second day as well. Usually bit of finger food or buffet and hanging out with the closest family and friends. Some people don't like the idea because it may put pressure on people to attend and spend even more money.
Naturally if you'd have been there anyway because you had to travel or wanted to spend time with your brother, then that's different.

We had a second day back in our hometown with finger food and wine. A few people that weren't able to come to the wedding came there, and congratulated us. It was really nice to see them. Also family that travelled from abroad was around the extra day anyway and it was the perfect way for everyone to meet up again without the rigmarole of "the wedding" and just chat and then hug and kiss goodbye. I'd have really hated to have missed out on that time with my family, because it really was very special to us.

fiona-f

I also dislike two-day weddings but that's a personal thing. In your specific plan though, I would say Halloween is very definitely a big day for people with children so I imagine they would be very unlikely to attend even if their kids are invited - kids would prefer to go trick or treating in their own area, with their friends.

The entertainmemt you have planned also sounds very elaborate and catering for very specific tastes - personally I wouldn't enjoy that type of circus-style entertainment and I don't know whether it would be popular amongst my group of family and friends either and so it would be wasted on my social circle. Think carefully about your demographic, it would be very disappointing for you if you invested a lot in a theme that doesn't excite tour guests.

Second days are more about socialising and talking anyway so do you really need external entertainers?

xalot

I think toots had great suggestions about making the actually wedding Halloween themed but still keeping it classy. I love the idea of personalising the ceremony/reception to fit in with your interests / personality.

I like second days of weddings when they're chilled out and accommodating to my hangover, however the thoughts of getting dressed up in a halloween costume and all that effort would tip me over the edge the day after a wedding!

Sala

Tarzana wrote: »

Well... lots of people consider the next day shindig OTT.

I'm not sure about this. The last three weddings I was at had second day events and I'm sure more people stayed than left. Also the second day can be used to accomodate people who have travelled rather than leaving them alone the next day. Very often close family and friends don't want to leave after one day- last wedding I was at with family form abroad staying etc the brides parents had taken 3 weeks off work. They were well up for a party and of say they would have all stayed beyond day 2. Out of the three weddings I only missed one 2nd day and that's because I had exams. To be fair, given enough notice Id probably row in for a 3 or 4 day wedding!! But maybe that's just me :-)

But I don't think there's anything wrong with a 2nd day once it's easy going i.e. leave the day after if you want to / have to, if you don't, we're having a BBQ. IMO Most people who have a second day are fully aware some people will go home and don't hold it against them at all, but also want to do something for the close family friends and people who have travelled

Tarzana

Sala wrote: »

I'm not sure about this.

I didn't say everyone. And it probably depends on the wedding. But a lot of people just want to go home the next day.

I think if there's going to be a second day thing, it should be low effort to attend as many people will be nursing sore heads. Having to dress up in a costume just sounds hassley.