What to do with too many tubs of Margarine ?

masculinist

I have about 20 tubs of margarine which have not expired past their best before date. I also hate margarine and only ever use butter. What can I do with the margarine ? Can I donate it to someone, can I use it as fuel ? Can I use them for a messy practical joke ? Can I throw them all into the deep fat fryer to have just one big guilty fry up ? I think Margarine burns so that wont be a runner unless it doesnt ? Can I smear them on my body and use them to escape a maximum security installation in the depths of winter ? Can they be composted ? I seem to remember fats are not recommended for composting. Can I find a pig farmer whos pigs will eat them all ? Pigs have a reputation for eating anything.
Strange ideas cross my mind like wearing rubber gloves and heaving a big messy harmless sticky ball at someone as a practical joke. A gigantic catapult scud missile launcher to launch a big messy gob of Marge to distant lands.
Ideas please... landfill would be a waste...Can I make a margarine powered engine ?
And practical jokes might get me in trouble with the law so thats a no no... ... Does anyone want to knock back 20 tubs of Margarine while I video the results and upload to YouTube before driving you to A&E ?

tomwaterford

swap for half eaten kit-kat/some other random ****e on adverts

robindch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bRxsweDq0FE

fleet_admiral

Have a dirty sloppy ****

Kovu

No-one mentioned this yet?

qo2cj1dsne8y4k

Bake?

indigo twist

Seriously how did you end up with 20 tubs of margarine if you don't even like margarine?

kneemos

indigo twist wrote: »

Seriously how did you end up with 20 tubs of margarine if you don't even like margarine?

He's dyslexic.

Lapin

Buy Kerrygold from now on OP and you'll never have that problem again.



Margerine? WTF?

Fuzzytrooper

Grease yourself up and then chase down a wolf in an air vent.

Davarus Walrus

March out into your back garden. Decide to put up a clothes line. Dig a hole. Fire down the 20 tubs of margarine into the hole. Sit back and admire your work. Maybe post a photo to facebook of you standing beside the hole, while holding a bottle of beer. Wallow in the thanks.

Realise that firing margarine down the hole isn't going to help in this DIY task. The washing line isn't going to reach the gable end of the house. Knock down the house before admitting that the decision to use 20 tubs of margarine to put up a clothes line was a very bad idea.

Banjo String

Give them all to poly whatsername.

Chance The Fapper

Have a good ****

Jake Rugby Walrus666

indigo twist wrote: »

Seriously how did you end up with 20 tubs of margarine if you don't even like margarine?

It might have been an (unwanted) gift.

kneemos

Jake Rugby Walrus666 wrote: »

It might have been a gift.

Of magerine?

masculinist

Lapin wrote: »

Buy Kerrygold from now on OP and you'll never have that problem again.

You have this in Ireland too ?

wazky

Lather your knob in it and ask fat girls to lick it off, they can't resist.

Fred Swanson

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Jake Rugby Walrus666

kneemos wrote: »

Of magerine?

Look that's just the whey i see it having skimmed over the thread.

lukesmom

Banjo String wrote: »

Give them all to poly whatsername.

Is she one of the unsaturates?

masculinist

can I even feed it to birds or wild animals ? I guess not as it would probably give them all obesity and diabetes if it didnt poison them first !

Fred Swanson

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masculinist

can I even feed it to birds or wild animals ? I guess not as it would probably give them all obesity and diabetes if it didnt poison them first !

it seems the height of insanty that theres like 5000 calories in each tub while people are starving to death for need of calories a few thousand Km away.

Lapin

Fred Swanson wrote: »

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And stink the house out for a week :eek:

Rogaine2

Who gives a gift of 20 pots of margarine to someone? If they fell off the back of a truck, I'd leave them on the road where they fell.

Rogaine2

lukesmom wrote: »

Is she one of the unsaturates?

First cousin of Mono! Ya know Mono surely? Lives across the road from the tree there, on the road, just past the church, before the crossroads?

Jake Rugby Walrus666

Rogaine2 wrote: »

If they fell off the back of a truck, I'd leave them on the road where they fell.

If safe to do so and watching out for on coming traffic - i think you should in fact not leave them where they fell. A serious accident could be caused. The pots/containers (20) should be moved into the side of the road.

catallus

Rogaine2 wrote: »

Who gives a gift of 20 pots of margarine to someone? If they fell off the back of a truck, I'd leave them on the road where they fell.

Maybe they had too many and it was affecting their profit-margarine?

masculinist

Rogaine2 wrote: »

Who gives a gift of 20 pots of margarine to someone? If they fell off the back of a truck, I'd leave them on the road where they fell.

You are just jealous.

Rogaine2

masculinist wrote: »

You are just jealous.

I can't help it!

I'm drooling at the mouth Homer style thinking of MARGARINE..........

Miss Lizzie Jones

Donate them to a food bank.

biko

If there is some homeless shelter around? They might want them.
Or buy 20 loaves of yesterdays bread for a fiver or whatever and hand out the combo to beggars.

Canis Lupus

Jake Rugby Walrus666 wrote: »

It might have been an (unwanted) gift.

Worst birthday ever was it?

masculinist

Canis Lupus wrote: »

Worst birthday ever was it?

Not if the margarine had been used

Rogaine2

Canis Lupus wrote: »

Worst birthday ever was it?

In fairness, it's the gift that keeps on giving........

FloatingVoter

If "porn movie" hasn't been mentioned yet, it should have been.

Ruu

Make toast, everyone loves toast.

masculinist

Ruu wrote: »

Make toast, everyone loves toast.

yeah but with butter....margarine is nothing compared to real butter. This margarine makes me wanna puke.


A margarine eating contest uploaded to YouTube would be fun ... the winner would win eh.... more tubs of Margarine

My name is URL

Ever see the film Last Tango in Paris?

FloatingVoter

My name is URL wrote: »

Ever see the film Last Tango in Paris?

[EVIL LAUGHTER] Fat Marlon greases up for some rear entry. A scene unfortunately hard to forget.

masculinist

FloatingVoter wrote: »

[EVIL LAUGHTER] Fat Marlon greases up for some rear entry. A scene unfortunately hard to forget.

Im probably lucky I either didnt see it or cant remember ...

lulu1

indigo twist wrote: »

Seriously how did you end up with 20 tubs of margarine if you don't even like margarine?

it fell off the back of a lorry I can't believe it's not butter

FloatingVoter

masculinist wrote: »

Im probably lucky I either didnt see it or cant remember ...

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0070849/

Its ehhhhm......artistic. I'll summarise - Brando makes a shedload of cash from doing a porn flick in Paris. Roll credits but not before the butter scene.

Capt'n Midnight

Ruu wrote: »

Make toast, everyone loves toast.

everyone loves toast with real butter

shruikan2553

This story is a load of rich creamery butter

masculinist

Miss Lizzie Jones wrote: »

Donate them to a food bank.

wheres the food bank ?

Fred Swanson

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masculinist

Fred Swanson wrote: »

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are there any charity shops which take them ? They do need refrigeration.My fridge is full to breaking point soon

Fred Swanson

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