Bridezilla Stories

ElleEm

I think we were all astounded by the recent thread about WhatdoIcare's horrendous experience of being a bridesmaid. It has spurred on a few conversations where I have been shocked at other people's Bridezilla experiences. A friend of a friend was recently a bridesmaid, and was told to go on a diet a couple of weeks before the wedding, and given strict instructions on what to eat, and what to avoid. The same bride decided that she did not want a meal included on her hen night as she didn't want people consuming extra calories with their drink!
I also remember a very slim friend being berated by her cousin as her "stomach stuck out" in her bridesmaid dress.
What experiences have you had of a Bridezilla?

Dial Hard

Haven't had any personal ones but when I was on various wedding for a in the run-up to my own wedding, I couldn't believe the carry-on of some brides. They usually thought they were absolutely in the right and were online looking for reassurance that their behaviour was justified too.

The most memorable ones were:

- bride having a sh*t fit because the car she'd booked to take the bridesmaids to the church wasn't the exact same colour as their dresses when she went to view it in person

- bride wondering if it was bad form to sack her bridesmaid (best friend since primary school) who had the temerity to get pregnant after being asked and was going to "ruin" the photos by being 7 months pregnant in them

- bride openly considering asking two overweight cousins to be her bridesmaids rather than her two sisters because they were both slimmer and better-looking than her and she didn't want to be "upstaged"

Sadderday

I was bridesmaid.

The couple told me that for their girft I could chip in €200 quid with the other bridesmaids for their wedding car.

And,

The bride wanted me in her home the night before. When I arrived (after work, travelled over 100km, left my car at hotel and got a lift the rest of the way) ...... there was no bed for me. So, she asked her neighbour If I could sleep on the couch.. which I did, I didnt get a room in the hotel, they were all booked out before I got the cash together to book so I didn't drink so I could drive home... the make up artist used the same brushes etc on all of us... I got mono a few months later, my cash and little bag that I cought that I had tampons etc in was given to someone by the bride to mind and didn't get it back until after dinner and speeches etc at about 8pm, it was a disaster...

when I did try to leave at about 2am, I was in big in big trouble.

tbeans

Bridesmaid too -

Stuff like telling me I'd ruin her photos as I was too brown and to start wearing factor 50 (Was on holiday month before wedding)

Being very particular about shoes I wore despite BM dress being a long one and no one could see the shoes

Demanded we stay on the dance floor all night as it would help encourage others to get up

Booked us in for expensive beauty treatments the day before that we had to pay for ourselves

No say in where I could stay wedding night and had to fork out on expensive hotel room despite being only a taxi ride home

She's normally a nice person so I think the stress starts to come out in funny ways!! At least it was only a short term annoyance

eviltwin

I was asked to be bridesmaid and then unasked when I lost weight. My mother in law does wedding flowers and she has some stories of brides and some grooms being totally mental with their demands and with histrionics on the day.

sunbeam

I've never been a bridesmaid but have read several threads online about bridezillas 'firing' their bridesmaids which have left me a bit bewildered.

I mean it's not as if they are paid employees. I always though that 'maid' referred to a young unmarried woman rather than an actual servant-hence the term 'matron of honour' used to be used for a married attendant.

MsBubbles

The bride I heard of a (brunette) hated blonde hair so much she persuaded her blonde bridesmaid into dying her hair brown.

Lima Golf

A friend of mine was a bridesmaid once and the bride demanded she get her ears pierced. My friend is 30, if she wanted to pierce her ears she would have done so by now! The brides argument was that the other bm's would be wearing emerald type studs and she'd look out of place. Just to keep her quiet my friend ordered a similar clip on pair online.

ABajaninCork

I worked as an Events Manager in London and ran a lot of weddings. I've had a few Bridezillas in my time, but the best one was a Russian lady who came with her English fiance to view the venue. I was the manager conducting the show-round.

Lady was swathed in fur and had a Fox's Glacier Mint as an engagement ring. The venue I worked at is a Grade 1 listed Georgian mansion with a decommissioned chapel attached to it. Bear in mind then that the furniture will be of antique quality.

This biatch walked round the venue with her nose stuck in the air. She said the building was too old (WTF???). The carpets were dirty and needed to be replaced (Um - they were steam-cleaned only that week!). She also wanted to change the colour scheme of the rooms as it didn't fit her scheme (WHAT???). Oh - and as for the grounds (set in Richmond Park no less). They were too small.

Thank God she didn't book. But I've thought about her and wondered if the wedding ever did go ahead. Her poor fiance looked very harassed. Lovely man though.

OTOH - I had a couple who wanted to book. They didn't have two pennies to rub together, and had to scrimp and save to get the venue as they loved it so much. They were the nicest couple EVER! I worked their wedding which was great fun. The happy couple had a whipround at the reception for us, and tried to give a £200 tip.

Xenji

My sister worked at a hotel that hosted a lot of weddings, they had one last new years eve where the bride requested that all bar staff wore pink shirts with black bowties, only male bar staff were allowed and the waitresses had to be over a certain age and unappealing, the hotel was pet friendly and she actually booked a suite just for her dog.

Zaph

I know someone who was fired as bridesmaid because the bride decided that the fertility treatment the bridesmaid was receiving posed too much of a risk that she could have a pregnant bridesmaid at her wedding.

Addle

I was bridesmaid once, no really bad personal experience, but still wouldn't do it again.

I def didn't have it as bad as a girl I went to school with. Her sister asked her to be bridesmaid, she reluctantly accepted, was then asked to get a gastric band to speed up weight loss...seriously! She was treated like ****.

The sister is a perma bitch though-her unreasonableness wasn't confined to wedding planning.

ABajaninCork

Xenji wrote: »

My sister worked at a hotel that hosted a lot of weddings, they had one last new years eve where the bride requested that all bar staff wore pink shirts with black bowties, only male bar staff were allowed and the waitresses had to be over a certain age and unappealing, the hotel was pet friendly and she actually booked a suite just for her dog.

And did she get it?

Toots

A bride I know made her bridesmaids wear the ugliest, ugliest dresses you ever did see. They all hated them but she insisted those were the only ones they could wear. She never admitted it, but it was very obvious that she didn't want any of them 'looking nicer' than she did on the day.

wuffly

Anyone had mother-of-the-bridezilla? In the week coming up to the wedding this woman made her daughters life a living hell up to and including cancelling the flowers the bride had booked and loved because she thought the were common.... she didn't like anything my friend had planned and systematically cancelled anything she didn't like last minute hoping we couldn't re arrange it. Luckily i had taken the week off so the bride and I blitzed it and got it mostly back on track. I'll never forget finding my friend on the bathroom floor the day before the wedding balling her eyes wondering what she had done to upset her mother so much. She did end up being a diva on the day but she has apologised a million time since. It was all the stress her mum put her through and her mum would have blown a fuse if she said boo to her on the day. She knew i would smile and kick her ass another time. This was the reason I was so chilled about my own there was no way i was going suffer like that or ruin it for myself by letting other people stress me out.

NewMrs2b

A friend was BM and the bride ordered all the dresses from light in the box, I know some people have a good experiences, but this girl picked dresses that were hard to pull off if well made,let alone when badly made. The waist should have been an empire and started somewhere between belly button and bust depending on which dress you got they begged to bring them to be altered (at their own expense) but she point blank refused her aunty stepped in and offered to fix them FOC but she wasn't having a bar of it. By the time the dinner was finished the dresses had bust and they ended up in their own clothes before the afters began! This bride got herself so worked up over the wedding she ended up in hospital - When they were being announced into the reception the hotel naturally called them Mr & Mrs X she didn't change her name and instead of just going with it made the toastmaster correct herself I was RAGING I didn't have my camera to hand!!

One of them is a BM for me she was very nervous about the dresses I was going to pick haha! Thankfully no 'empire' waist!!

Any Groomzilla stories out there? - I know weddings can make some women act like spoiled selfish children, but I would be interested to hear if anyone knows any irrational men on the run up to their wedding day?


for example my husbands friend had 3 stags - the "big one in Estonia" which was for 5 days, the "Irish" one in Kilkenny which was for 3 days and the "local" one which was an overnighter in a town 30 miles away this was in 2006 Celtic tiger times. for the Estonia stag he insisted they all wear two different printed teeshirts with his name and the date of his stag on it. They had to take hols of work, the cost to celebrate this man's upcoming wedding was gigantic. The worst part is, as he was the first of the group to get married everyone pandered to him - when everyone else got married he turned down invites to several of the lads weddings! what a jerk.


Ps the couple are separated now - he cheated on two of his stags and this behaviour spilled over to his marriage.

daveohdave

Call me heartless but I've no sympathy for the mother / mother-in-law scenarios. If the person isn't mature enough to put them in their place, they're certainly not mature enough to get married.

January

A bride I know had her bridesmaids in navy coloured dresses, she tried to insist that nobody else wore ANY other shade of blue because she was 'worried that the photo's would look like she was trying to match the Dublin colours).

She also had her bridesmaids mop up the house before they left for the church.

stargazer 68

Not quite bridezilla but we were in a hotel a while ago and the receptionist was telling us that the wedding the week before was a nightmare and the bride was a complete cow to everyone. But on a previous occasion - they only do one wedding a day - and they had a wedding booked. A party had booked 20 people into the restaurant as well which is not unusual. However when this 'party' turned up it was a wedding with the bride and groom in full dress. The hotel staff spent the day trying to keep the 2 brides apart!

Neyite

I know someone who:

Got a distant relative by marriage to make very complicated favours - like these literally took months, and her husband ended up helping her to get them finished in time, all at their own cost, then disinvited the couple for a frivilious reason a week before the wedding, and their ryanair flights were none refundable.

Got her parents into serious debt for this big wedding. Mind you, they were the bigger fools but she would thow a tantrum if she didnt get what she wanted and they would cave. Every time.

Told everybody that she wanted cash only. And timed her honeymoon so that any cheques she got on the day would have cleared before they flew out.

Flew first class to her honeymoon and stayed in a 5 star penthouse. Which is fine, but when your parents owe €50,000 to the bank to pay for your wedding, it'd have been decent to hand over any profit made on the day to make a dent in their debt.

She had an affair and left the husband after 18 months. That was about 5 years ago, I think her parents are still paying off the loan.

Neyite

Dovies wrote: »

Not quite bridezilla but we were in a hotel a while ago and the receptionist was telling us that the wedding the week before was a nightmare and the bride was a complete cow to everyone. But on a previous occasion - they only do one wedding a day - and they had a wedding booked. A party had booked 20 people into the restaurant as well which is not unusual. However when this 'party' turned up it was a wedding with the bride and groom in full dress. The hotel staff spent the day trying to keep the 2 brides apart!

That's a terrible receptionist! Whatever about going home at the end of the day or posting on R&R or in here, you dont badmouth other guests to the public! I'd wonder what she was saying about me when I left.

I dont get the one wedding a day thing. I know one bride who did want that in her venue explained that she didnt want to pay so much to a hotel for them to give crap service because they had two massive functions on in the day, and I know that was a genuine concern for her, but I think that its more about a bride not wanting to be upstaged, like your anecdote demonstrates and hotels pander to this (and charge accordingly!)

tishandy

I'm a makeup artist and I am lucky to rarely get a bridezilla. That's because I can tell them a mile off and I make an excuse that I am not available on their date.
Its more often than not a bridesmaid or mother of the bride who cause extra stress that morning.
Some that stand out from this year are ...
# Bride wanted her hair down and bridesmaids hair up. Que one bridesmaid with beautiful long hair that she was obviously very proud of , arguing half an hour with bride and hairdresser that she wanted her hair down too. Bride pleading with her that she could let it down after the dinner but no the bridesmaid locked herself in loo and cried and wailed like a baby until the bride relented.

# Another wedding in a swanky castle , I had a very large group to do so timing was tight.
I was told Mother of bride was upset and stressed and wouldn't have makeup done.
OK. 6 times I asked would her mother be ready but was told " No she's taken some tablets and is gone to bed.
Hairdresser running behind so I start doing two flower girls hair. in comes mother 1/2 hour before service in a dressing gown looking for makeup.
I told her 1 minute I have to put literally 3 curls in Flower girls hair. She shouted at me to hurry up I should have been ready for her.
I was heavily pregnant and she watched me struggle dragging a heavy chair back into the room to do her makeup. ( I'd taken it out for flowergirls) Snapped at me to get her a glass of water and asked me why I wasn't ready for her. I was going to make her late for daughters wedding.
I told her what I'd been told which she said was nonsense and why didn't I ring her. Complained bitterly to me about how late she was because if me (even though I did quickest makeup of my life) yadda yadda. ;/ The drama the mother caused was really upsetting to bride all morning , You'd think it was her wedding the way she was acting. needed to cop on and suck it up if u ask me.

DeltaWhite

Some of you may remember my post about the unfortunate events when I was BM for my brother and his wife to be last year. But as the thread was deleted, I thought I would post some more info because it was just a horrific experience!

On day of wedding:
Aggressively harassed me for "not being tan enough" and bet about 5 layers of sun shimmer tan onto me that morning.
Shrieked like a banshee because my "boobs weren't big enough" and were smaller than her Rihanna wannabe cousin's boobs.
Also had a massive b!tch fit that I was "too tall" and the photos would look so odd

In the run up to the wedding I was forced by her to be like a wedding planner. She kept ringing my phone in work and as we arent allowed personal calls on mobiles, I told her to stop calling during work as I would get in trouble and get a warning. She then tracked down my job name, got the phone number and started ringing my JOB asking for me. One day my boss phones me and said "emm, there's a person on the phone for you and said it's really important???" Yep you guessed it, bridezilla on the phone freaking out about some unimportant crap about the ribbons for the cake. Fair play to my boss though, I explained to her that my head was wrecked and I did not want these calls, so the anytime she rang and my boss picked up she kept telling her I was too busy to be taking calls

She lives down the country and night before the wedding her 2 cousins are driving down as we had to stay in hers to go the church next morning. I asked her if I could get a lift with them as I dont drive and it would make sense to go with them but NOPE - "sorry there's not enough room in the car with all the stuff they are bringing" ??????
So I had to organise to get the bus down, which wasn't the end of the world BUT she expected me to collect the cake where I live and BRING that with me on the bus 2 hour journey. So I said no Fcuk that. You can get your precious cousins to collect it seeing as they are driving down and I'm SURE they have enough room for a cake.

MAGICALLY - there was now room in the car!!! Wow that wasn't hard at all was it! So just because I refused to bring the cake with me she then arranged for me to go with her cousins, there was plenty of room in the car too!

I've known this woman over 20 years and she's always been a bit of a battleaxe but seriously, she turned into an absolute wagon in the run up to this wedding that I can barely stand being in the same room as her now. She made myself and my family's life hell and we don't really see her now. She did loads more but I can feel myself losing the will to get through today talking about it haha

I kind of laugh about it now, but I can guarantee the lovely people of boards that I will NEVER be a bridezilla - ever. I've seen how horrible some women can be and I think life is too short to be a physco b!tch from hell

Sorry more to add
I organised the whole hens, paid for all the tacky sh!t to wear (no offense people, it's just not my cuppa) the Bride wanted specific night out which I sorted and mailed all her friends and family on facebook, and they all moaned constantly through messages back to me about how "crap" this night was going to be. My head was wrecked doing it, then on the day of the hens loads of people mailed me saying they cant go with bullsh!t excuses, and I then had to tell the Bride that all her family werent going, it end up being about 7 people in the end, I had originally invited around 25 and they all let her down. We still had a good night but it just shows how much her family values each other.

Glad she's my brothers problem and not mine

Neyite

tishandy wrote: »

I'm a makeup artist and I am lucky to rarely get a bridezilla. That's because I can tell them a mile off and I make an excuse that I am not available on their date.
Its more often than not a bridesmaid or mother of the bride who cause extra stress that morning.
Some that stand out from this year are ...
# Bride wanted her hair down and bridesmaids hair up. Que one bridesmaid with beautiful long hair that she was obviously very proud of , arguing half an hour with bride and hairdresser that she wanted her hair down too. Bride pleading with her that she could let it down after the dinner but no the bridesmaid locked herself in loo and cried and wailed like a baby until the bride relented.

# Another wedding in a swanky castle , I had a very large group to do so timing was tight.
I was told Mother of bride was upset and stressed and wouldn't have makeup done.
OK. 6 times I asked would her mother be ready but was told " No she's taken some tablets and is gone to bed.
Hairdresser running behind so I start doing two flower girls hair. in comes mother 1/2 hour before service in a dressing gown looking for makeup.
I told her 1 minute I have to put literally 3 curls in Flower girls hair. She shouted at me to hurry up I should have been ready for her.
I was heavily pregnant and she watched me struggle dragging a heavy chair back into the room to do her makeup. ( I'd taken it out for flowergirls) Snapped at me to get her a glass of water and asked me why I wasn't ready for her. I was going to make her late for daughters wedding.
I told her what I'd been told which she said was nonsense and why didn't I ring her. Complained bitterly to me about how late she was because if me (even though I did quickest makeup of my life) yadda yadda. ;/ The drama the mother caused was really upsetting to bride all morning , You'd think it was her wedding the way she was acting. needed to cop on and suck it up if u ask me.

Oh the temptation to do her in clown makeup would have been too much for me!

Stepping Stone

My friend was a BM a few years ago. We were staying with her parents the night before and we were told she was gone at 6am and wasn't home til almost midnight. We were up before 8 the next morning and we were told that she was gone before 6.

She is blonde and was forced to die her hair the most unflattering shade of mousy brown for that wedding. The dresses were awful, the make up was terrible and the hair was not just ugly, it was painful. The bride was blonde, radiant, well made up and generally looked amazing. She had turned my beautiful friend into a frump for the day.

Bridezilla hadn't trusted the hotel staff to get the reception room right so had been there the day before with rulers and tapes fixing everything. She was so controlling and psycho. Her mother was as bad, cancelling cake, flowers, cars, etc. My friend was left to sort it all out (which she did). The other BM was the bride's sister who was just about as unhelpful as she could be. She developed a temporary, almost symptomless illness where she just didn't have the strength or energy to do anything.

You could cut the tension with a knife that day. I will never forget it.

Pistachios & cream

Can we please keep this thread going. I'm getting married next summer and hopefully this thread will prevent me from becoming a bridezilla in case wedding fever hits!

I've been a bridesmaid twice both times for my sisters and neither has been a bridezilla, but its been quite stressful as you want everything to be perfect for them!

MsBubbles

ahayes84 +1 I'm getting married in 4 weeks time. Maybe I should release my inner Bridezilla ;-)

Thoie

ahayes84 wrote: »

Can we please keep this thread going. I'm getting married next summer and hopefully this thread will prevent me from becoming a bridezilla in case wedding fever hits!

I've been a bridesmaid twice both times for my sisters and neither has been a bridezilla, but its been quite stressful as you want everything to be perfect for them!

MsBubbles wrote: »

ahayes84 +1 I'm getting married in 4 weeks time. Maybe I should release my inner Bridezilla ;-)

If you're going to have some kind of special "candle ceremony" and expect your bridal party to have the special candles, buy the candles in advance, and give them to the team in good time, explaining what they're for. I do not recommend asking the bridesmaid mid-ceremony "Do you have the candles?" only for her to ask "What bloody candles?". Replace "candles" with any other fecky/awkward/unusual thing you want to happen in the middle of the ceremony

MsBubbles

Thoie oh no ! I've asked my sister to get the unity candle and I will buy the other candles myself. No bridesmaids or groomsmen for us. My best friend is my witness and hubby to be's best friend is his witness.

We want a very low key relaxed wedding so that's what we're having

ABajaninCork

Neyite wrote: »

That's a terrible receptionist! Whatever about going home at the end of the day or posting on R&R or in here, you dont badmouth other guests to the public! I'd wonder what she was saying about me when I left.

I dont get the one wedding a day thing. I know one bride who did want that in her venue explained that she didnt want to pay so much to a hotel for them to give crap service because they had two massive functions on in the day, and I know that was a genuine concern for her, but I think that its more about a bride not wanting to be upstaged, like your anecdote demonstrates and hotels pander to this (and charge accordingly!)

I totally get the one wedding a day. It's not a case of being upstaged (for me anyway), but you're paying enough for a wedding. You want decent service and the venue to run the day for you. No-one should be looking around for the duty manager who might have gone off to look after the other bride. That was the only stipulation I had when looking for a venue for my own wedding. No way did I want to be 'fighting' to get staff's attention where they might be engaged somewhere else. And there's no way I'd have a venue that caters for more than one wedding a day. Service isn't assured.

Thoie

MsBubbles wrote: »

Thoie oh no ! I've asked my sister to get the unity candle and I will buy the other candles myself. No bridesmaids or groomsmen for us. My best friend is my witness and hubby to be's best friend is his witness.

We want a very low key relaxed wedding so that's what we're having

Just as long as your witness knows there will be candles involved, and isn't taken by surprise! :pac:

Things like that can also dictate the size of handbag the bridesmaids carry. Many bridesmaids/witnesses have 2 bags - a tiny clutch (or nothing) for the ceremony, and a larger one hidden away somewhere that contains everything from emergency first aid kits, to pens, camera(s), phones, spare engine parts, 5 course meal, and a very small spaceship.

I know I was once going to be witness, had asked the bride in advance if my teeny tiny clutch bag would suffice, and was told yes. Then, on the day, was expected to fit the bride's phone, cigarettes and lighter and an inhaler into the teeny tiny clutch.

ABajaninCork

MsBubbles wrote: »

Thoie oh no ! I've asked my sister to get the unity candle and I will buy the other candles myself. No bridesmaids or groomsmen for us. My best friend is my witness and hubby to be's best friend is his witness.

We want a very low key relaxed wedding so that's what we're having

Can you not get the candles together and give them to the venue to set up in advance? We gave our candles to the florist, she decorated them and set them up on the church altar.

MsBubbles

Thoie, The candles will be lit by myself and the groom.
We've all discussed the emergency kit knowing my clever and crafty friend her leatherman will be in the emergency kit just in case which will all be in a bigger bag
discreetly hidden

Neyite

ABajaninCork wrote: »

I totally get the one wedding a day. It's not a case of being upstaged (for me anyway), but you're paying enough for a wedding. You want decent service and the venue to run the day for you. No-one should be looking around for the duty manager who might have gone off to look after the other bride. That was the only stipulation I had when looking for a venue for my own wedding. No way did I want to be 'fighting' to get staff's attention where they might be engaged somewhere else. And there's no way I'd have a venue that caters for more than one wedding a day. Service isn't assured.

I can understand that aspect, which is how the bride I know explained it to me, she genuinely wouldnt give two hoots if another bride was there, it was about the service. And I've worked weddings so I know that hotels are stretched during the service of a reception. Totally understandable to not want two big function rooms going because service will suffer.

What I'm talking about is when you have a regular booking in the restaurant, separate from the function room, where they are eating off the normal menu with no requirements that would set them apart from any other paying guest of the hotel, but one of the group happens to be wearing a wedding dress. Then thats more about two brides in the venue, rather than diluting the service in the function room.

stargazer 68

Neyite wrote: »

What I'm talking about is when you have a regular booking in the restaurant, separate from the function room, where they are eating off the normal menu with no requirements that would set them apart from any other paying guest of the hotel, but one of the group happens to be wearing a wedding dress. Then thats more about two brides in the venue, rather than diluting the service in the function room.

Yeah but if your hotel 'guarantees' and sells their wedding service as only one wedding per day (which a lot of places do) and then you find another one there it's a different story IMO.

Tarzana

wuffly wrote: »

Anyone had mother-of-the-bridezilla?

Shouldn't that be motherzilla-of-the-bride?

Tarzana

tishandy wrote: »

Some that stand out from this year are ...
# Bride wanted her hair down and bridesmaids hair up.

My very non-bridezilla friend had this stipulation when I was a bridesmaid for her. It was her only demand. Don't see the problem, really?

EDIT: Wait read your post wrong!

MsBubbles

ABajaninCork that's the plan to set everything up in advance. I asked my sister to buy the candle but will get it from her before the day.

ABajaninCork

Mumzillas is what I call them!

I had an Asian wedding once. The bride was lovely. The groom was a genuine 24 carat *****. As for Mum? She tried to treat me like a servant. At one point, I was on my hands and knees trying to repair her beautiful silk beaded sari which had got caught on her sandals. So I painstakingly unravelled the thread from the sandal, cut the loose thread and did a running repair on the hem. Fine - she was happy with that.

Then she snapped at me to get a glass of water for her. OK. I snapped when she asked me to fetch her bag, which was right opposite her, whilst I was holding pins for the hairdresser to put up the bride's hair. I calmly told her to fetch it herself, I was busy. She went nuts!! I guess the fact I told her slavery was abolished 200 years ago had something to do with it...

The groom tried to bully me into letting them have fireworks, saying it was all sorted with the Venue Manager. I knew nothing was in the booking and told him that. He tells me he's going to have me fired. OK. But you're still not getting fireworks, and you have to be out of here by 12.30. Nasty little man. Typical 'short man' syndrome...

Dial Hard

NewMrs2b wrote: »

When they were being announced into the reception the hotel naturally called them Mr & Mrs X she didn't change her name and instead of just going with it made the toastmaster correct herself I was RAGING I didn't have my camera to hand!!

I wouldn't have made the person correct him/herself but I wouldn't have been impressed either if that had happened to me. It's not a natural assumption that the woman is going to change her name. My hotel just said "Ladies and gentleman, please be upstanding for your bride and groom", which is all that's required, imo.

happywithlife

Re the one-wedding-a-day thing
I was at a swanky Dublin hotel once and witnessed two weddings arrive within an hr of each other - both were put into different rooms but because it was such a rare nice sunny day, guests preferred to mingle on the terrace and lawn - nobody had a clue which party was which and guests were mega confused - as were staff etc I assume. Nightmare for the hotel to co-ordinate as well

Neyite

Dovies wrote: »

Yeah but if your hotel 'guarantees' and sells their wedding service as only one wedding per day (which a lot of places do) and then you find another one there it's a different story IMO.

Yes, if its another function booked for a wedding. Like I said.

But if its 10 people sitting in the restaurant, totally separate from the function room, eating a regular dinner and one just happens to be wearing a white dress, are you really going to be that person to kick up a fuss with the hotel in the hope of getting a reduction on your bill resulting in them kicking the other dinner party out on to the street and ruining a happy day for another family?

Or what would you do on your wedding day if you saw that happen in your 'one wedding' venue?

Dial Hard

Dial Hard wrote: »

I wouldn't have made the person correct him/herself but I wouldn't have been impressed either if that had happened to me. It's not a natural assumption that the woman is going to change her name. My hotel just said "Ladies and gentleman, please be upstanding for your bride and groom", which is all that's required, imo.

Yeah I know at a ceremony I was there for the rehearsal etc and they did ask in advance how they should announce them after it was over

NewMrs2b

Dial Hard wrote: »

I wouldn't have made the person correct him/herself but I wouldn't have been impressed either if that had happened to me. It's not a natural assumption that the woman is going to change her name. My hotel just said "Ladies and gentleman, please be upstanding for your bride and groom", which is all that's required, imo.

I agree should be just a 'Bride & Groom' announcement,

My point was(which I could have been clearer on!), she never put in a request - and some of the signs she had got made had this title (to tie in with other aspects of the day she had decided on) so the hotel assumed she was going down this road,

I know I have often said 'ah here is the new Mr & Mrs x' and found out later the lady wasn't changing her name and cringed at!

Actually reminded me of a gal a couple of seats away from me in work complained that her name wasn't changed on her email when she came back from honeymoon, the poor IT guy didn't even know she had got married he was mortified when she bailed into the office shouting at him!

Personally I couldn't give a fiddlers hoot what I am announced as just get me to the table without tripping over!

seamus

NewMrs2b wrote: »

I know I have often said 'ah here is the new Mr & Mrs x' and found out later the lady wasn't changing her name and cringed at!

I thought there was never any kind of formality around that, especially when it comes to weddings. I've often greeted new grooms as "Mr. <Bridesname>" for the craic, I thought everyone was far more chilled about that kind of stuff these days.

Actually reminded me of a gal a couple of seats away from me in work complained that her name wasn't changed on her email when she came back from honeymoon, the poor IT guy didn't even know she had got married he was mortified when she bailed into the office shouting at him!

A place I worked in had something of a run of new brides who made a big fanfare of getting their name changed on email, in the directory, on all sorts of systems, as soon as they arrived back from their honeymoon; emailing all their contacts about their new address, etc. Nearly half of them quietly had it changed back 6-12 months later when their marriages failed...

After that it became fashionable in that workplace to continue to use your maiden name in work and married name outside it

NewMrs2b

seamus wrote: »

I thought there was never any kind of formality around that, especially when it comes to weddings. I've often greeted new grooms as "Mr. <Bridesname>" for the craic, I thought everyone was far more chilled about that kind of stuff these days.

I don't want to derail the thread with name talk because everyone is entitled to there own opinion on it, if they want to both change there names to the 'Bananahammocks' more power to them,

I don't think there is a formality it was just how I greeted them for no other reason than it was there wedding day. Like I say I cringed after when I heard either she wasn't changing her name or like you say maybe he is taking her name

Tarzana

seamus wrote: »

I thought there was never any kind of formality around that, especially when it comes to weddings. I've often greeted new grooms as "Mr. <Bridesname>" for the craic, I thought everyone was far more chilled about that kind of stuff these days.

I think you're coming from a male perspective there. For many women, being called Mrs. <Groomsname> or worse Mrs. <Groomsfirstname> <Groomssurname> still carries heavy connotations of ownership over her.

ABajaninCork

Personally, I don't care. Either way, I'll still have a man's name. Either my maiden name (father's name) or married name (husband's name). I answer to both...

daveohdave

Tarzana wrote: »

I think you're coming from a male perspective there. For many women, being called Mrs. <Groomsname> or worse Mrs. <Groomsfirstname> <Groomssurname> still carries heavy connotations of ownership over her.

That's the entire point of seamus' joke.

Tarzana

daveohdave wrote: »

That's the entire point of seamus' joke.

Not really. "I thought everyone was more chilled about it" - for a man to be called that is no big deal but for women, it's not long since that was commonplace so many women won't be OK with it, even if it's a joke, and that is very understandable.