F#*king Flys

sh__93

F#*k off flys!

sebastianlieken

can of deodrant + lighter.

neil_hosey

are they not them ants?

Eircom_Sucks

neil_hosey wrote: »

are they not them ants?

See the size of them basterds , out with my son on his bikes yesterday and loads of them on the ground , they are huge

jellyboy

Mi-wadi is your only ploy against these agents of Satan

After weeks of flustering arms like a giant octupuss in the kitchen ,i despaired
until my son left his undiluted mi-wadi in a cup

Without any planning permission they turned it into a swimming pool
now they just float like litte pins in a sea of mi-wadi

sh__93

neil_hosey wrote: »

are they not them ants?

They look to be just regular house flys in our house. The ones that stop and rub their legs together like they're plotting a dastardly plan.

They're up to no good. I know it.


Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

sh__93

jellyboy wrote: »

Mi-wadi is your only ploy against these agents of Satan

After weeks of flustering arms like a giant octupuss in the kitchen ,i despaired
until my son left his undiluted mi-wadi in a cup

Without any planning permission they turned it into a swimming pool
now they just float like litte pins in a sea of mi-wadi

Thanks for the offer but I don't want yo use up all of your-wadi. Haha. I know, their blatant disregard to rules and regulations has to be the worst if it.

House is full of them sticky ribbon yokes that hang from the ceiling.
They're like dead fly icicles. Ugh.

kneemos

If you pull the wings off a fly what do you call it ?

GoodBridge

You need an a-salt Rifle : https://www.youtube.com/user/BUGASALT

DoozerT6

*flies.

darragh o meara

Might be worth getting the chimney looked at. We had an unmerciful plague of the f u ckers a few weeks back coming down the chimney, turns out there was a nest with a dead Bird at the top. A quick clean and they were gone.

sh__93

darragh o meara wrote: »

Might be worth getting the chimney looked at. We had an unmerciful plague of the f u ckers a few weeks back coming down the chimney, turns out there was a nest with a dead Bird at the top. A quick clean and they were gone.

Cheers, I'll have a look.

anncoates

kneemos wrote: »

If you pull the wings off a fly what do you call it ?

Can'tfly

Duggy747

The worst is when Jeff Goldblum shows up hanging upside down on my ceiling, puking all over my food and talking about insect politics.

Tilly

kneemos wrote: »

If you pull the wings off a fly what do you call it ?

A walk.

fineso.mom

Tilly wrote: »

A walk.

And what do you call a sheep with no legs ?

The Backwards Man

fineso.mom wrote: »

And what do you call a sheep with no legs ?

Whatever you want, it won't come anyway

fineso.mom

Bluebottles.......hate em!

Nolimits

Those door screens from JML that fit over the door frame and close with magnets work really well. It obviously won't stop them coming in windows but you can leave the back door open with no worries.

LizzieJones

fineso.mom wrote: »

And what do you call a sheep with no legs ?

A willing partner?

Maphisto

fineso.mom wrote: »

And what do you call a sheep with no legs ?

Chops

fineso.mom

fineso.mom wrote: »

And what do you call a sheep with no legs ?

A cloud.

Sounded funnier in my head.

Sorry
I'll go away now.

Donkey Oaty

The British Council website for helping kids learn English says:

What do you call a sheep with no legs? Answer: A cloud!

Then they ask:

Do you understand the joke? If not, click here.

If you click there, it says:

Clouds in the sky sometimes look like sheep!

Happy to clear that one up for everyone.

meoklmrk91

Buzzy little ****ers have my head wreaked, on nice days I usually have the door open for the dog to potter in and out of the backyard, doesn't take long before one is in and annoying me.

eamonnq

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

The British Council website for helping kids learn English says:



Then they ask:



If you click there, it says:



Happy to clear that one up for everyone.

Did you use google to search for the answer ??

Donkey Oaty

eamonnq wrote: »

Did you use google to search for the answer ??

I used Google to search for "Our goal is to build bridges of trust and understanding among people around the world" in the hope that it might provide an answer to the sheep question, and - by Google! - it did.

kneemos

Donkey Oaty wrote: »

I used Google to search for "Our goal is to build bridges of trust and understanding among people around the world" in the hope that it might provide an answer to the sheep question, and - by Google! - it did.

Trippy dude.

lazeedaisy

I have one of these a few years now

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Galaxy-HSD-ONLINE-BUG-ZAPPER/dp/B000S8H08E/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1406192697&sr=8-2&keywords=racket+fly+swatter

What's the difference between a fly and a bird?

lazeedaisy

A fly can fly but a bird can't bird.

DoozerT6

lazeedaisy wrote: »

A fly can fly but a bird can't bird.

Haven't you heard....?

wretcheddomain

kneemos wrote: »

If you pull the wings off a fly what do you call it ?

Paul McCartney

kneemos

DoozerT6 wrote: »

Haven't you heard....?

About the bird?

kneemos

DoozerT6 wrote: »

Haven't you heard....?

About the bird?

endacl

Tilly wrote: »

A walk.

What do you get when you pull the legs off a walk?

catallus

What bird?!

endacl

catallus wrote: »

What bird?!

The bird is a word.

catallus

The bird is two words?

minotour

kneemos wrote: »

About the bird?

Everybody's heard that the bird a is word.....

endacl

minotour wrote: »

Everybody's heard that the bird a word.....

Papa ooma mow mow?

endacl

Good thread!

catallus

ski-ba-bop-ba-dop-bop

cloud493

Get a bug light. Amazing things they are.

endacl

cloud493 wrote: »

Get a bug light. Amazing things they are.

Stay on topic.

:mad:

catallus

Why should we be pleasin' any the politician heathens
Who would try to change the seasons if the could?
The state of the condition insults my intuitions
And it only makes me crazy and my heart like wood.

Everybody stutters one way or the other
So check out my message to you.
As a matter of fact don't let nothin' hold you back.
If the Scatman can do it brother so can you.
I'm the Scatman.

B-B-B-Be Bop a Bodda Bop
Bop a Bodda Bop

eamonnq

bird is the word

BeerWolf

Someone invent me a device that emits a burst of air, or something, to stun / kill flies around you - one that you can carry on yourself while out talking through the countryside.

You'd be a Billionaire!

[*Someone will suggest bug spray cans* - No! I'm talking about a single pulse emitted in a radius all around you!]

catallus

Them lyrics need tweaking, beerwolf.

Badly Drunk Boy

endacl wrote: »

What do you get when you pull the legs off a walk?

A raisin?

I'm sure they'd be equally tasty...

irish gent

yes they are flying ants.

kneemos

irish gent wrote: »

yes they are flying ants.

You hearing voices dude?

shruikan2553

BeerWolf wrote: »

Someone invent me a device that emits a burst of air, or something, to stun / kill flies around you - one that you can carry on yourself while out talking through the countryside.

You'd be a Billionaire!

[*Someone will suggest bug spray cans* - No! I'm talking about a single pulse emitted in a radius all around you!]

I could do that. It may kill or damage any other living thing within the radius but its a small price to pay.