What do you do when Mormons call?

Kermit.de.frog

I suppose this could apply not just to mormons but others too.

So I was sipping on a cherry coke of an evening (this evening) when the doorbell rang. I didn't know who it would be before I answered it but it was mormons. They seem to struggle to take "no" for an answer or to leave. I was a little underwhelmed at the strength of their arguments to be honest but the manner in which they kept trying to convert me was as admirable as it was pointless.

I'd rather not have them call again. Is there any strategy I could deploy which ye could recommend as maybe a discouragement to them to call again?

And maybe some future tips if the first line of defence (the front gate) is breached and conversation inevitable.

TY!

Menas

Answer the door naked whist in a state of sexual excitement.
Works for me, except when the Green party call round.

WarOnDrugs78

I tell them I'm not interested and close the door as fast as possible. I overcome the natural instinct to be polite, yet I'm not rude. Don't let them control the situation.

Fr_Dougal

"No thank you".
Close door.

El Guapo!

Just take their booklet thing and say "I'm not really interested but thanks anyway. Have a good day."

I don't understand why people slam doors in their faces etc. It doesn't take much effort to be polite.

umop.episdn

They don't call to me anymore.....not after the last time...

Ruu

Don't answer, an unopened door is a happy door.

Maphisto

We've never had Mormons but then we are out in the Oulou so ...

A Jehovah's witness woman comes round most years, she usually just buys a dozen eggs from us

WarOnDrugs78

Another strategy would be to try to convert them to atheism. But you'd need to be in a good mood to do that. I schooled three Mormon women in Limerick City last summer.

bumper234

Treat them like beggars, chuggers, politicians, etc. Give them a firm but polite no thanks and close the door, if you let them start their "sales pitch" you're ****ed.

AllGunsBlazing

I try and convert them to satanism.

\m/ Hail Satan!

littlelulu

Get some literature on another religion. When they call try and convert them to the religion of your choice. Tell them you will try theirs out if they try yours out first.

Works a treat

kneemos

Do they actually get new recruits that way?must be soul (and sole)destroying.
Surely there must be better more efficient methods of converting the heathen?

Kermit.de.frog

Trigger Happy wrote: »

except when the Green party call round.

i.e Eamonn Ryan?

WarOnDrugs78

kneemos wrote: »

Do they actually get new recruits that way?must be soul (and sole)destroying.
Surely there must be better more efficient methods of converting the heathen?

They are doing it to convince themselves of the "truth" of their religion, as much as they are to convince you. It's how cults work.

pablo128

We had them at the door once when I was a kid. When my mother realised who they were, she roared at them "this is a catholic house. Now fcuk off!"

They never came back.

kneemos

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

i.e Eamonn Ryan?

A man even more convinced that he's right than the Mormons.

Temptamperu

Imagine atheists did this... there would be up roar.

"Hello sir! would you like to talk to me about not jesus?"

bumper234

pablo128 wrote: »

We had them at the door once when I was a kid. When my mother realised who they were, she roared at them "this is a catholic house. Now fcuk off!"

They never came back.

Ha ha you have just reminded me of the time they came to the house years ago.

Dad catholic
Mom protestant
Me atheist

Mormon knocks on the door, dad takes one look and says "there's enough ****ing religions in this house without you adding to it"

krudler

kneemos wrote: »

Do they actually get new recruits that way?must be soul (and sole)destroying.
Surely there must be better more efficient methods of converting the heathen?

with a religion as batsh1t mental (even as far as most religions go) as Mormonism you gotta reach out to everyone. Sure who wouldnt want to be part of a religion where there's magic underpants involved?

WarOnDrugs78

krudler wrote: »

with a religion as batsh1t mental (even as far as most religions go) as Mormonism you gotta reach out to everyone. Sure who wouldnt want to be part of a religion where there's magic underpants involved?

Mormonism is the fastest growing religion.

Lucifer MorningStar

I get them to mow the lawns

beano345

I was sitting in my room one day when they were either Mormons or hare krisnas called to the door and my father answered it I could hear the conversation clearly,they were showing him a picture of paradise and waffling away when he asks them "have you ever been there?" Eh well no they said,come back to me when you have he tells them and closes the door in their face.sometimes ya can't beat common sense

WarOnDrugs78

krudler wrote: »

with a religion as batsh1t mental (even as far as most religions go) as Mormonism you gotta reach out to everyone. Sure who wouldnt want to be part of a religion where there's magic underpants involved?

You're right, they play a numbers game. Talk to 100 people and you will get one or two people in the midst of a personal crisis who will buy the cult bull.

Borderfox

Years ago my friend always loved lying on the couch watching the football scores coming in and he lived next door to me. I have the Jehovahs call into to me to bring the light of Jesus into my life. I told them no thanks but my friend was lost in a life of debauchery and gambling and could they help him.

He couldn't get rid of them

token101

WarOnDrugs78 wrote: »

Mormonism is the fastest growing religion.

No it isn't. Not in Ireland or Europe anyway. Maybe if you're talking percentages, but that's not exactly accurate is it?

The Backwards Man

I invite them in for the evening. Lonely socially awkward weirdos can't be choosers!

Manach

I'm just glad they are not a Labour canvaser - if only for my blood pressure.

gg2

I wonder what would happen if you hit them with "I actually am a Mormon!" ..... Or if you just hit them??

eviltwin

I say no thanks and they go away. They are harmless. Its the charity collectors wanting to sign you up to a direct debit who are hard to get rid of.

SimonLynch

I tell them 'you're OK, I'm Jewish' I'm not but they seem to be geared up to doing Christians, works for me.

WarOnDrugs78

token101 wrote: »

No it isn't. Not in Ireland or Europe anyway. Maybe if you're talking percentages, but that's not exactly accurate is it?

Yes, percentage wise. Their growth rate is way ahead of the other religions. Christianity and Islam had a head start in terms of absolute numbers.

umop.episdn

token101 wrote: »

No it isn't. Not in Ireland or Europe anyway. Maybe if you're talking percentages, but that's not exactly accurate is it?

If they still continue their baptism of the dead practice, we will all end up mormons?

pablo128

gg2 wrote: »

I wonder what would happen if you hit them with "I actually am a Mormon!" ..... Or if you just hit them??

They used to go around my area on mountain bikes when I was a kid/young teenager. (North Clondalkin). We used to jeer at them or whatever, as kids do.
Anyhow, they went into one estate one evening, and got attacked, with one of them being stabbed to death!:eek:
The attackers were locked up. One of them was a brother of a girl in my class at the time.
They weren't seen in the area for a long time afterwards.

SimonLynch

umop.episdn wrote: »

If they still continue their baptism of the dead practice, we will all end up mormons?

But we'll all have magic underpants, I've always wanted them.

umop.episdn

pablo128 wrote: »

They used to go around my area on mountain bikes when I was a kid/young teenager. (North Clondalkin). We used to jeer at them or whatever, as kids do.
Anyhow, they went into one estate one evening, and got attacked, with one of them being stabbed to death!:eek:
The attackers were locked up. One of them was a brother of a girl in my class at the time.
They weren't seen in the area for a long time afterwards.

Cheeky little rascals weren't they!

Antar Bolaeisk

WarOnDrugs78 wrote: »

Another strategy would be to try to convert them to atheism. But you'd need to be in a good mood to do that. I schooled three Mormon women in Limerick City last summer.

Atheism is not a religion, you can't convert someone to it.

I'd politely tell them no thanks and close the door.

WarOnDrugs78

Antar Bolaeisk wrote: »

Atheism is not a religion, you can't convert someone to it.

I'd politely tell them no thanks and close the door.

It's possible to convert someone from belief to lack of belief.

privateBeavis

Just say no thanks "I don't want to waste your time" before closing the door, like you're doing them a favour!

kneemos

WarOnDrugs78 wrote: »

It's possible to convert someone from belief to lack of belief.

It's a belief in other people's mistaken beliefs.

Poor Uncle Tom

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

I'd rather not have them call again. Is there any strategy I could deploy which ye could recommend as maybe a discouragement to them to call again?

They can join the others in the cellar......

rubadub

El Guapo! wrote: »

I don't understand why people slam doors in their faces etc. It doesn't take much effort to be polite.

Not calling door to door expecting people to give up their free time is the polite thing to do, very simple. People slamming doors etc is the equivalent of shouting at a dog or small child, they want to let it be known that they think their behaviour is totally unacceptable, in the hope it will discourage them from doing it again, or at least not have them going off thinking the person did not mind.

How are they do know otherwise? The last thing many people want to do is encourage it. I would like to see all forms of cold calling and unaddressed mail distribution made illegal, its an easy cover for burglars.

Prince, the singer, is a Jehovah's Witness and calls door to door, I might let him in.

WarOnDrugs78

kneemos wrote: »

It's a belief in other people's mistaken beliefs.

= a good working definition of all religions.

Marcusm

Invite them in for dinner and a marathon viewing of The Following.

punisher5112

Kermit.de.frog wrote: »

i.e Eamonn Ryan?

He cycles the wrong way down the road and has a big gas guzzler outside his front door but invented the carbon tax and that that we are now stuck with and increases every year.

Satriale

Only had them here once, i said "No thanks. Bye" and off they popped with a smile and a "thank you".
Now, if only the guys selling carpets, dodgy generators and politics were as fast to take a subtle hint...

NowThatsCool

Take the rosary beads off the peg by the door and falling on bended knees and with hands upstretched in beseeching appellation pray for the divine intercession of the holy virgin for the salvation of their wretched souls and their conversion from the path of perversion and blasphemy and back into the sacred embrace of our dear lord and saviour...

...or not depending on what's on telly.

Cantremember

Tell them I have a Nigerian prince on the phone offering to clear my computer of a virus and I have to go.

catallus

These people obviously want to be your friends and help you become part of their community! Why don't you welcome them with a warm embrace and hear what they have to say? Or do you have something to hide, op?

Reindeer

Come back here again, and you'll be meeting your maker in person.

Pinch Flat

I have Slayer's "South of Heaven" ready in the CD player. Works each time. \m/