Does anybody ring up those sex chatlines?

YellowFeather

Ya know the ones. "Gorgeous girls are waiting for your call right now. Dressed in skimpy underwear. And gyrating on a couch for some reason."

I just saw an ad there on 3e for one for single women to ring up for free. The girl on the ad seemed pretty happy. She kept jumping up and down and stuff. What exactly is the guy saying to her? And what's the point in a free service? Surely they start charging at some point. How good is the call that, after ten minutes, you're hooked enough to start paying premium rates?

I don't get it.

wazky

Yes I do, it's the one instance where my premature ejaculation is a positive.

cml387

And they always use the same dwarf anyway.

Muise...

I knew a woman who worked on one years ago, back when only boastful people had brick-sized mobile phones. She used to enjoy making up characters and stories to tell the callers, but hated it when she'd hear the pips and realise she was assisting in the jizz-splashing of a public phonebox. :eek:

Gannicus

I did once to see what the fuss was all about when I was 19 or 20. Was shíte and added nearly €5 onto me phone bill just to get to the person "to chat with".

Muise... wrote: »

I knew a woman who worked on one years ago, back when only boastful people had brick-sized mobile phones. She used to enjoy making up characters and stories to tell the callers

Is she:

A) Hot
Single
C) Both

If answer is B or C hook me up ha ha ha ha

shopaholic01

Muise... wrote: »

I knew a woman who worked on one years ago, back when only boastful people had brick-sized mobile phones. She used to enjoy making up characters and stories to tell the callers, but hated it when she'd hear the pips and realise she was assisting in the jizz-splashing of a public phonebox. :eek:

What would she say to them? How long would the calls/callers last?

Davarus Walrus

I'd say it's mostly single men in their 50's and 60's who ring these. Full of cheap lager, feelings of loneliness and with a dose of the horn.

shopaholic01

shopaholic01 wrote: »

What would she say to them? How long would the calls/callers last?

"Hey there sexy...I'm so hot I'm burning up...can't cool down...guess where I'm touching myself, and why...."


Translation:

Thank christ you can't see me boi, I'm havin' a hot flush and trying to scratch me back, but I haven't been able to reach that spot in years.

Muise...

Big Steve wrote: »

I did once to see what the fuss was all about when I was 19 or 20. Was shíte and added nearly €5 onto me phone bill just to get to the person "to chat with".

Is she:

A) Hot
Single
C) Both

If answer is B or C hook me up ha ha ha ha

D) Lesbian, only not in a porno "lesbian" way.

shopaholic01 wrote: »

What would she say to them? How long would the calls/callers last?

Her most popular character was a middle-aged, middle class wife, who would get very very drunk at dinner parties she was hosting for her husband's business colleagues, and crawl under the table to suck them all off.

I never asked her how long the calls lasted. Till the callers ran out of 20p coins, I suppose. :pac:

kowloon

I wonder if you could connect two of them in a conference call, how long would it take them to realise?

Cantremember

I tried to buy a sofa off this one that was on the telly a few years ago. Grand sofa it was.

tomwaterford

kowloon wrote: »

I wonder if you could connect two of them in a conference call, how long would it take them to realise?

I would say phone bill would be frightening...they would never hang up:P

Femme_Fatale

I know a woman from West Cork who has worked on them. In fairness, she has the sexiest voice (and no, she doesn't have a Cork accent). But she used to be told to put on a posh English accent for the Irish phone-lines, and keep her unusually sexy Irish accent for the British ones.

YellowFeather

Davarus Walrus wrote: »

I'd say it's mostly single men in their 50's and 60's who ring these. Full of cheap lager, feelings of loneliness and with a dose of the horn.

But, sure in this day and age, would they not just use the internet? I'm still curious about the one for women to ring up though. They must have an audience. But who???

Muise... wrote: »

Her most popular character was a middle-aged, middle class wife, who would get very very drunk at dinner parties she was hosting for her husband's business colleagues, and crawl under the table to suck them all off.

:eek: That's actually brilliant though.

antodeco

Preistchat is where it's at these days.

I looked on Youtube for the clip of Vicky Pollard working on the sex line.

Can't find it though

Menas

kowloon wrote: »

I wonder if you could connect two of them in a conference call, how long would it take them to realise?

There was a recording doing the rounds about 10 years ago of exactly that. Both girls were following the same script with each other. Can't find it now though.

beano345

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nkk_a_XaBc4

I wonder if any of the clients really believes there's a stable of hot girls squirming around in push up bras, twirling their hair around their fingers while they wait for random strangers to call them for session of self love?

Fair amount of suspension of disbelief in play I'd say.

The Backwards Man

It's like the two old farmers waiting for the new AI station to open for the first time.

'Awful quiet for a place of it's kind' says one to the other as he tried to peer in through the window.

Femme_Fatale

Candie wrote: »

I wonder if any of the clients really believes there's a stable of hot girls squirming around in push up bras, twirling their hair around their fingers while they wait for random strangers to call them for session of self love?

Fair amount of suspension of disbelief in play I'd say.

The women can work from home. Watched a documentary about it and it was a middle-aged woman with a headset - attractive woman but sitting on her couch with a cup of tea and knitting and wearing just a comfy jumper for around the house, and slacks, and saying breathily "I'm playing with myself now big boy" - a look of total disinterest on her face.

shopaholic01

Candie wrote: »

I wonder if any of the clients really believes there's a stable of hot girls squirming around in push up bras, twirling their hair around their fingers while they wait for random strangers to call them for session of self love?

Fair amount of suspension of disbelief in play I'd say.

But these hot, single girls are only in their area, it's not a nation-wide phenomenon.

Femme_Fatale

Although there are chat-lines now with the girl (skimpy underwear, writhing around on a bed, making sex faces, dirty talking and borderline masturbating) on your TV screen, and if you phone up she'll speak to you - yes, YOU, personally.

Muise...

Candie wrote: »

I wonder if any of the clients really believes there's a stable of hot girls squirming around in push up bras, twirling their hair around their fingers while they wait for random strangers to call them for session of self love?

Fair amount of suspension of disbelief in play I'd say.

I think any kind of sex requires suspension of disbelief, slowly, from the clasps of a silk suspender belt... or else it'd be weird and you'd be laughing too much to do it.

It's often said men are more aroused by images than women are, so it'd be interesting to see how the line for women gets on. I'd say the whole point of the phone lines is the interaction and imagination, which porn can't provide. And as someone whose hearing is practically an erogenous zone, I kinda get it.

kowloon

shopaholic01 wrote: »

But these hot, single girls are only in their area, it's not a nation-wide phenomenon.

There are hot, single girls in 'unidentified proxy'.

Red21

Davarus Walrus wrote: »

I'd say it's mostly single men in their 50's and 60's who ring these. Full of cheap lager, feelings of loneliness and with a dose of the horn.

Those guys would probably be able pay for the real deal.

I'd say it's mainly 14/15 year old teenagers, who get away with it for a while until the phone bill comes, then their mothers end up hammering them round the house with a frying pan.

Molester Stallone

Red21 wrote: »

Those guys would probably be able pay for the real deal.

I'd say it's mainly 14/15 year old teenagers, who get away with it for a while until the phone bill comes, then their mothers end up hammering them round the house with a frying pan.

Sex lines & then a bit of s&m? I never had it so good when I was 15!

shopaholic01

Red21 wrote: »

I'd say it's mainly 14/15 year old teenagers, who get away with it for a while until the phone bill comes, then their mothers end up hammering them round the house with a frying pan.

No doubt that would be an equally effective horn killer.

osarusan

Cost my parents a bomb on their Telecom eireann bill one month many many moons ago. It was just recordings then (maybe it still is now) - you called, and a sexy voice started telling a sexy story.

My father called the phone company to find out what the big bill was for, and the person mercifully replied with a vague comment about 'entertainment' numbers. I told them I was listening to music - new releases of songs - over the phone. No idea whether they believed me or not.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

There was a programme on C4 a couple of years ago, about the women that work on them. All different backgrounds, early 20s student, middle aged housewife etc. The student was out walking along a canal whilst talking dirty, not a bother on her.

The housewife had her friends over for coffee, and the dude was on loudspeaker, the friends were struggling to hold in their laughter! Nice little earner too, one of them said the longest call they'd received was 110 mins, I think, at £2 a min :eek:

I'd do it myself if I thought there was anyone willing to pay to listen to me!

osarusan

osarusan wrote: »

I told them I was listening to music - new releases of songs - over the phone. No idea whether they believed me or not.

Of course they didn't, but they didn't want to embarrass you either.

Karl Stein

antodeco wrote: »

Preistchat is where it's at these days.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7pGcE7IvCTs

MadYaker

Reminds me of this from the Graham Norton show :pac:

Ruu

A regular caller of this one.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kN-8m2KbJLQ

bnt

Those chatlines cost money to operate, and they're not going away, so I must assume that people are calling them up. Damned if I know who those people are, though. I find the concept incredibly sad. (Emotionally sad, I mean, I'm not calling any person "sad" ).

Galwayguy35

Babestation on Sky seems to be still going strong, so someone must be ringing them.

They must have lots of money though, just watch a porno for free on the net and get the same result (shoot your load).

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

Drehen

Galwayguy35 wrote: »

Babestation on Sky seems to be still going strong, so someone must be ringing them.

They must have lots of money though, just watch a porno for free on the net and get the same result (shoot your load).

I've cracked one off many a time to babestation, just watching, it's a refreshing change from traditional porn. They used to rate pictures of erections that men sent in, and not architectural. I wonder why they discontinued that theme, was quite amusing with tgeir leaderboard

porsche959

antodeco wrote: »

Preistchat is where it's at these days.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7pGcE7IvCTs

Fred Swanson

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Call Me Jimmy

I would never dream of ringing one of these places up because it goes against my religious beliefs.

tsssss

dxhound2005

The TV channels like Babestation are known as Slapper on a Sofa.

Sh1tbag OToole

Femme_Fatale wrote: »

The women can work from home. Watched a documentary about it and it was a middle-aged woman with a headset - attractive woman but sitting on her couch with a cup of tea and knitting and wearing just a comfy jumper for around the house, and slacks, and saying breathily "I'm playing with myself now big boy" - a look of total disinterest on her face.

Any idea why in the almighty feck guys want to call her up? How can somebody get so desperate?

orangesoda

no but i'm a great man for the camming, i wouldn't know what to say on them chat lines, i would scare the lassies off anyway with my culchyness,
'awk aye i'm wan*king surely'
'Jesus, Mary and Joseph you're a filthy wee heure aren't ye?'
'here it's now, aye aye aye, awk Christ'

tomwaterford

Sh1tbag OToole wrote: »

Any idea why in the almighty feck guys want to call her up? How can somebody get so desperate?

I wouldnt think its her on the ads...sure how would they know over the phone??

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

Fred Swanson wrote: »

It is mostly cheating husbands that don't have the balls to see a whore, who want a bit of excitement in their dull sex lives.

Where dafuq did that come from?!? If I had to guess I'd say it's lonely pissheads home from another unsuccessful night on the pull, who ring up babestation for a chat and a tug.

Fred Swanson

This post has been deleted.

Panthro

I was mates with a girl back in the good oul secondary school days. She broke up with her fella because he was a bit of an asshole. He really was not getting the hint.
What she do only somehow managed to divert all his calls to a sex line.
It was frickin' hilarious, he didn't cop for ages.

orangesoda

Drehen wrote: »

I've cracked one off many a time to babestation, just watching, it's a refreshing change from traditional porn. They used to rate pictures of erections that men sent in, and not architectural. I wonder why they discontinued that theme, was quite amusing with tgeir leaderboard

do you remember 'flash the gash' on a friday at 11pm, the women would flash their pussy for a minute or so, it was the highlight of my week as a young fellow

WilyCoyote

Very hard to dial - with both hands going at the same time.